每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5taMcLDr2
輕嘆一聲。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtjfnraVlt
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZiVnMMAfxe
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0NwHzAUw0i
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0DEbvhqtsk
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsnMEevwnep
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTO98Q6hmq
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JwlAafZad
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdiChZcG57E
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH2BJRsFf7B
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWthW8DBgOp
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzu80deMz3p
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnlwaARpqUe
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgARQKcMnJN
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡndYnMvndml
他百思不得其解。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhvIr1vhtX6
再聲輕嘆。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjhU8mDoSKy
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0sba6yCSH
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Xw1pBhrhi
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT9u7Pc3ARR
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbaE69IHHyc
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ462IPdj7Vp
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpiKqHNaK3
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvc11kF4PA
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOGDoX3csA
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Dljq3hrM0
緣起緣滅，不由自主。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfP8CuhKbk0
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw6Mxykd74X
既要緣滅，何必緣起？411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlbdPrng71c
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWXPEtUvY7
他百思不得其解。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrhDUVPms8A
輕嘆有三。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe5pPDy3gTg
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUb5zHvLyry
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFadT6sZBP
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKqSyuR8bPP
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8D7ZsVt7aw
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdvrkv6iGuN
鬱悶。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBb9EFp4qkP
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLdKKjuTReN
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrcpkPlSwwQ
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7wdjDUKKM
去抱！去奪！411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcU18KOSQ9U
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抱甚麼？腿已不在。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7teMuzml9x
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0Y2yeShbc
奪甚麼？球已不在。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPupoFcoYK7
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn9dO3k4FLL
為何不在？為何統統不在？411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjfYfMwkx4
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那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpemp8CzDeY
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQ7a7kjfDn
停下來！411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fhcEo9M8l
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWHiHLkb6s
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzd0Sk3wp2z
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAq2L8YDs8p
慢下來！411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiGrNksMAoG
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7PgNP82PpG
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5Ate1Rff5
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTORHN9tjnK
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc1rpJ5R6nY
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWjRIcFsIk0
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUWrMgtwlA3
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9QLsUtqiD
昔日的他，今日的孫。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQXanO5W4Q
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmEN140uiw
永劫，輪迴。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb8qRlijeje
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC92IwdmpdQ
不敢思，不求解。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSIj0dfBox
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGp3xSmMwQ5
嘆，嘆，嘆。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKw5PU4t7ys
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqFlPuqBwe
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0mFZu0WTo1
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZtgIM23zs
他搖頭。411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6y0L5lw1e
411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKSUvJrTkj
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9wMi49squ
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