Revision: Anxiety!Dark
P.O.V: First Person
(A/N: Before reading this, if you don’t know anything regarding this song, please take note that it details many aspects of depression and suicidal thoughts and behaviour. This chapter and hopefully this chapter only will contain such as well. If you are okay with this, do enjoy.)
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There was a boy I met in kindergarten
My head hurts...
He was sweet, he said that I was smart
Another visit from Dr.Panic and Nurse Anxiety.
He was good at sports and people liked him
I miss him,
And at nap time once we shared a mat
I miss the old days:
I didn't sleep I sat and watched him breathing
When we’d stay up till Dawn just fooling around,
Watched and dreamed for nearly half an hour
I miss those times,
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
But it was all a fantasy, a dream, a SICK nightmare.
Then he woke up
I dont know whether to be happy or sad that I woke up.
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmdYt4MyFEY
He pulled a scab off one time playing kick ball
Bumps and lines of dark, velvete maroon decorate my wrists like a christmas tree.
Kissed me quick then pressed it in my hand
It hurts but I dont say a word.
I took that scab and put it in a locket
I let my hair down, jagged strands and uneven chunks dangle and flow in the cold night wind.
All year long I wore it near my heart
My heart sobs with an agonizing stinging.
He didn't care if I was thin or pretty
Screaming at me to just end it.
And he was mine until we hit first grade
But I just let a tiresome sleep consume me,
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
Falling into the same nightmare again...
Then he woke up
But I cant escape reality.
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyw2j7tXAeM
Last night I dreamed a horse with wings
Mascara drizzle down my eyes in hopes of a rebirth from their black and sorrowful stain.
Flew down into my home roomOn its back there he sat
I shakily toss circles and ovals in my mouth, generous amounts.
And he held out his arm747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAo4xSSwg4F
So we sailed above the gym
Suddenly my hands stop shaking and Im back on my feet.
Across the faculty parking lot747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZTCi1mqoSe
My kindergarten boyfriend and I747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMbdCuYJgk
And a horse with wings
My heart high on today’s ‘breakfast’.
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwT5USC6P2i
Now we're all grown up and we know better
I just want to get it all out...
Now we recognize the way things are
But...
Certain boys are just for kindergarten747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBne96BOEfl
Certain girls are meant to be alone
I guess Im all alone..
But I believe any dream worth having747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhigfd7SRGA
So today's the day.747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiIh0Hh39ND
Is a dream that should not have to end747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ryhBEHC6J
So I'll build a dream that I can live in747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnTCMjpvDg1
I sigh heavily, holding my arms out in despair.747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExiP5cF8gl
And this time I'm never waking up747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1A5hholUm
My body swings dangerously, 747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NEYPttlAU
And we'll soar above the trees747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnCdMEzFxm
Back and forth..747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcaEbv53SCJ
Over cars and croquet lawns747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxozviHS6Mx
Back...and...forth...747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHbLYfnuNn
Past the church and the lake747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI9ArR6bbES
And the try-county mall
Suddenly, a new found fear dissolves into my dangerously unstable mind.
We will fly through the dawn747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCx0sqvhPWp
To a new kindergarten
I shake it off, tears blurring my vision;
Where nap time is centuries long
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
I let myself fall forward...
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIQH2pqHC8
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
The thumps echo up the stairs, Soon falling in sync of the throbbing headache I have.
Ooh ooh
”NO!! DONT!” Wait—!
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