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Three years.
Three years with Nova Rae Blackwell—the only woman I ever wanted to be something better for.
The one girl who made me want to slow down, fix the broken parts, be a man worth holding onto.
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But man, the pressure?
It’s like carrying a weight made of glass.
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Every day, I try to be perfect for her—perfect in the way she deserves.
Not the angry, broken guy she met.
The guy who snaps, who pushes, who’s got all these scars she never asked to see.
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But the harder I try, the more it feels like I’m just digging myself deeper.
Like there’s this voice in my head whispering: You’ll never be enough.
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I started lying to her.
Little lies at first—late nights at work, meetings that never happened.
Then the big ones.
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The first time coke touched my lips, it felt like control. Like a way to silence the noise inside my head—the expectations, the fear, the self-doubt.
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It was a mistake.
A dark, twisting mistake.
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But the harder I fought, the more I fell.
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And the cheating… God, the cheating was worse.
Not because I didn’t love Nova—because I do. More than anything.
But because I was broken, and I didn’t know how to say it.
So I ran.
Ran into someone who didn’t know the weight I carried.
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The nights I came home late, smelling like sin and regret, I watched her from across the room.
Trying to convince myself she’d never see the cracks forming in the man I was supposed to be.
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She deserved better.
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I deserved better.
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But right now?
I’m just a man lost in the chaos of trying to hold it all together.
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And I’m scared that when the truth comes out—when she finally sees what I’ve done—it’ll all be gone.
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The love.
The trust.
The us.
She walked in too quiet.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAqkcpC8jZ
Too steady.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5c5bonozhp
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Nova’s never been the silent type—unless she’s loading a bullet behind her eyes.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFFRbpme7Ic
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She didn’t sit. Didn’t yell.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRC1d92AAWa
Just stood there in front of me, her jaw locked like she was keeping herself from screaming.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0K3a4bEhPu
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She placed her phone on the table between us, screen-down.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7GegL5ukx
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“You been cheating on me, Saint?”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8HkqmOcNG
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I leaned back on the couch, like that could put space between me and what I already knew was coming.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEX0I8rthD
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“What?” I let out a low laugh. “Nova, c’mon. You really believe that?”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimbx92bujL
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She didn’t blink.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡATRjNMBXcP
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“Tell me again.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKC3ViDxlC8
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“I’m not cheating. You’re being insecure.” I shrugged. “You overthink everything, and now you’re dragging this sh*t up outta nowhere.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5oe87W0fo
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She slid the phone across the table and tapped the screen.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50IgA9KxIw
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“Play that.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlbhGyQ8kc4
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I hesitated.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0r70NcDMx
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“Play. It.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMareEUfJhF
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I picked it up. Tapped the audio file.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RpHV36PyI
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And there it was—my voice. Clear as day.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQ6QhbPx8X
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“She’s wild, but I like it. Keeps things interesting. Like, she’s beautiful, sure—but it’s the chaos that makes it exciting.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGldYKMCfyh
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Then laughter.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGoErzuv3t
A woman’s voice, smug and flirty.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDprd8W5nsc
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“So you stay with her ‘cause she’s crazy?”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHOSycYdnV
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And me again.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKCOqIZkST
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“She needs me. That’s the thing. Girls like her always crash eventually—and I’ll be the one she runs back to.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsawILfyr38
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I locked eyes with Nova. My heart hit the floor.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxtl4fy7UCT
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“It wasn’t like that,” I started, throat dry.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTd5pjZ9qcM
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“No?” she asked, voice shaking. “Then what was it like, Saint?”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9GiqaZLTP
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“I was just… talking. Trying to get her to leave me alone. You know how people twist things—”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwV5FCH9Ney
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“Those were your exact words. I didn’t twist a damn thing.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RiiirA62b
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I stood, hands clenched. “You’re overreacting—”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV15haAEsW2
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“No, I’m reacting exactly how I should.” Her voice cut like glass. “You let another woman lie next to you and feed off pieces of me—our relationship. You didn’t just cheat. You degraded me.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVP1OTAb8Z
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I stepped closer. “Nova, please. You know that’s not what I meant—”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ31d7T6Fv7M
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“But it’s what you said.” Her eyes were glassy, but not from tears—just restrained fire.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TzZ87rJrG
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“You called me wild. Broken. Chaotic.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvWm7aEgG7
She paused. “And you said you liked it. Like I was some kind of pet project that makes you feel alive when your own soul is dead.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoHXGdciX2
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I shook my head, heat rising to my ears. “I messed up. I know that. But you don’t get to paint me as a villain for one slip-up—”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXOQA4hq5FS
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“Slip-up?” she whispered, stepping in close.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kCtsNi3tf
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“You don’t get to tell the world I’m a beautiful disaster and expect me to still hold you like you’re my peace.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMqkpRoEjDT
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“I love you, Nova.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwuxQBUapW
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She flinched. Just a little. Then:25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxXjUg1Rjd
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“No. You love the control. You love the idea of me needing you.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9BHn74jIX
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I reached for her wrist. She pulled away.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQsSCRciSu
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“I loved you like you were oxygen. You loved me like I was fire—you liked the burn, but never wanted to get too close.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVdc9wr7yE
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The silence hit harder than any slap.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzS7nRJTGOK
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She turned to leave, but stopped at the door.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSekg67PY9R
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“Next time you lie to someone about me, Saint—make sure they don’t record it.”25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNhrZ6l58OH
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Door slammed.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNWyqNC3NB
And I was left with her voice echoing in my head.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKalT7t0u1i
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Not the one on the tape.25Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGSMYduD1V
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The one that finally decided she was done.
