向菱出教室,來到走廊上,突然就覺得南雨鎮的三月不存在春天。185Please respect copyright.PENANAxucLnVB61B
185Please respect copyright.PENANAaajrS4cxFo
據說祁小波感冒了,所以向菱那天沒有陪她出去玩。185Please respect copyright.PENANAXd0xgVQh0c
185Please respect copyright.PENANA4RG0lF98Eg
這事是祁澈先和她提的,那時他像是隨口一提,她點點頭,表示回應。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA9EJOwTgmzo
185Please respect copyright.PENANAhw6XS7ycGk
她原本和祁小波約好要一同去公園溜滑梯的,但因為此事,也只好之後再說了。185Please respect copyright.PENANARbXTlLaXPu
185Please respect copyright.PENANAHHb59yqfu9
海邊小鎮的春季多雨,多雲又帶點悶熱,海浪拍打得更加兇狠,雨下得更為頻繁。185Please respect copyright.PENANAu8w4C2d3ll
185Please respect copyright.PENANAPKOKyEsUi8
用一個字來總結就是——躁。185Please respect copyright.PENANADPcZUL9Jcf
185Please respect copyright.PENANAukhzxCE2Ze
高二下學期的春天,學生們到了適合思考自己生涯的年紀。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAnS3os5QcWZ
185Please respect copyright.PENANA70g4KMtQQk
台上的教師總會在講課時有意無意地提起,同儕間偶爾也有討論,引起不少人開始規劃。185Please respect copyright.PENANAFva3HTiwWz
185Please respect copyright.PENANAXmFoqlHUcg
楊宛和向菱聊到這個話題時,楊宛提起了她的志向。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAdL3zfzV4aX
185Please respect copyright.PENANAyrAoqlJE4W
「我故鄉那所大學的服裝設計系!」 185Please respect copyright.PENANAkgWiDO5Gqm
185Please respect copyright.PENANAlCK3fuHzyR
幾個同班同學也跟著提出了各自的目標,似乎已經充滿鬥志。185Please respect copyright.PENANAqJDdmrlrJg
185Please respect copyright.PENANAeBaspUdNp2
某個女同學說道:「我想去北渝市!」185Please respect copyright.PENANAC5qWai7Nin
185Please respect copyright.PENANAnmLG2k8aRj
另一個男同學順著她的話建議,「我也是,要不我們結伴吧?」185Please respect copyright.PENANASU0yWDk3dD
185Please respect copyright.PENANAiiRf8k9d43
「哈哈哈哈你們倆還真是般配——」185Please respect copyright.PENANADgeWqyGVHo
185Please respect copyright.PENANAI3k2lPFeyw
眾人笑鬧成一團,那對男女被同學們說得臉紅了。185Please respect copyright.PENANAGyXbqbAwDy
185Please respect copyright.PENANA8OzAoU0grL
十七、八歲的年紀,本就應該意氣風發,昂首挺胸,耀眼熱烈。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAEoIVEkbOfw
185Please respect copyright.PENANAgpY24q0Mxc
向菱卻是在此時變得心不在焉,默默退出了討論。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAIRgC4sR0L5
185Please respect copyright.PENANABJIZPOFh4s
她一直以來,都有些迷惘。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAKU2KnHbCQg
185Please respect copyright.PENANA16UGpJjy8T
少女悄然離開剛才嬉鬧著的人群,沒有目標的閒晃,直到她莫名其妙地抵達了教室外稍遠偏僻的走廊。185Please respect copyright.PENANAFdGSlSSPsd
185Please respect copyright.PENANArl486kDynr
那裡是安靜而沒有人煙的地方。 楊宛問了她不少關於將來的問題,她卻經常回答不上來。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAAr8YFkY68P
185Please respect copyright.PENANA30heYcGzIH
「北渝市不錯啊,而且你已經是文學界的大人物了,感覺很有前途嘛。」185Please respect copyright.PENANAl0mW3Y71tM
185Please respect copyright.PENANA9qKs6hFlqE
向菱不知道怎麼回應這種話。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA4q7B4CMfWU
185Please respect copyright.PENANAoNwLyQKeWu
因為她當初會步入文學,只是為了躲避身後的經濟、心理壓力,她只是想遠離。185Please respect copyright.PENANADqVzf1cXSz
185Please respect copyright.PENANAGud8SkeMS7
那時候,鄭娟因為向里的過世而開始出現異常行為,經濟困頓,她沒有專長又未達可以打工的年紀,於是只好拿出自己的興趣。185Please respect copyright.PENANALLja4IC6HZ
185Please respect copyright.PENANAl9XBimN1bn
結果最後越走越遠,她已經看不見家庭了。185Please respect copyright.PENANAhCf3MEA9V7
185Please respect copyright.PENANAfpZY0u9fYy
自那以後,她逐漸把寫故事當成了工作,而不是原先最純粹的興趣。 185Please respect copyright.PENANApRImtzHkyT
185Please respect copyright.PENANAsh1hsjixzk
思考大綱成為習慣,那麼提筆寫作就是例行公事。185Please respect copyright.PENANASOEtgCtuDa
185Please respect copyright.PENANAx9GouZvTdz
她仍然喜歡文字,仍會從故事裡得到快樂,不過她好像成為了一個工作狂,也對這樣的現況感到迷惑。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA1EijNzNn0D
185Please respect copyright.PENANAB1xQMu6gV4
向菱覺得自己還挺矛盾的,遲遲想不通。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAXW57XPVz8F
185Please respect copyright.PENANAfs1HEZ2EhR
她想起前陣子,室友王曉認真問過她的話。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAvXUqYGpW0U
185Please respect copyright.PENANAjW5KZECtJb
「你有想過未來嗎?」185Please respect copyright.PENANA1BrqW8od5W
185Please respect copyright.PENANAMqJe0O8kFr
——怎麼想?185Please respect copyright.PENANAUUKmMrVPKD
185Please respect copyright.PENANAlnB0ZXE29z
要怎麼想,才是正確的? 185Please respect copyright.PENANAIJoTcuyyuu
185Please respect copyright.PENANA3wg8dBhIKN
她那時候沒有回應,只是勉強扯了扯唇角,以示附和。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAXxK1x3eDoZ
185Please respect copyright.PENANApKILrNEkmx
大家都具有計畫,擁有目標,唯有她卻像是迷路的小孩子似的,不知所措的站在交叉路口。185Please respect copyright.PENANA3auCeSBLUs
185Please respect copyright.PENANAZcZhNDCg2L
向菱不知道有沒有人可以來拉她一把。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAa7aNgcydWA
185Please respect copyright.PENANACCn7w3UMhV
後來,大概又過了一段時間,文壇裡的朋友言恬,她說的話迫使少女開始直接面對另一件事。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAEUEdL9EbsX
185Please respect copyright.PENANAdJ6Ygamsi3
——她似乎喜歡上一個人了。185Please respect copyright.PENANAggtK4xYjlu
185Please respect copyright.PENANAp9jzmygsIS
原來不知不覺間,她也抵達了,會因為學業和愛戀煩惱的年紀。185Please respect copyright.PENANAYjQcmPrNi8
185Please respect copyright.PENANAoquNtW7iWS
那些事讓她愈來愈困惑,無法立即下決定但又無法乾脆割捨,陷入一種無止境的內耗裡。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAWOub98rPo7
185Please respect copyright.PENANAIvFOvIhmEE
這很不像向菱以往的風格,不乾脆,而且拖泥帶水。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA0jY66dYp3i
185Please respect copyright.PENANAAxs7WRq5V0
她覺得越來越看不懂自己了。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAwmbjESZYfG
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_ 185Please respect copyright.PENANAiHa6vyFVvb
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這麼稱呼似乎有點矯情,只不過她喜歡的人……算了,還是稱呼全名吧,祁澈。185Please respect copyright.PENANAQMSwll7VRq
185Please respect copyright.PENANAKaix8MAfdV
——她喜歡的人,祁澈,從中午那節午休之後就消失了、再也沒回教室了。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAFBURumUDZq
185Please respect copyright.PENANAXXVPScFc4X
這種事不是第一次發生了,下午時向菱問過沈中奕,對方一臉莫名的丟給她一句——你第一天認識祁澈嗎?185Please respect copyright.PENANArdnv2QAs0P
185Please respect copyright.PENANAs15DfwezBi
…… 話雖如此,向菱還是有一點想找他說話。185Please respect copyright.PENANAUpj4lseMxk
185Please respect copyright.PENANABL9zPHQaQl
放學後,她打開手機,讓螢幕畫面在對話框裡停滯,一邊思忖著她應該說些什麼。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAGpmT9ixC7p
185Please respect copyright.PENANAYrYJABSSI4
「祁澈。」 185Please respect copyright.PENANAhMju2suJCe
185Please respect copyright.PENANAOweJko7jwW
無意識的輸入了這個名字。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAvOsBQOypR6
185Please respect copyright.PENANAZ1IgIE0GQP
彷彿肢體比她先記住,這個人的身影。185Please respect copyright.PENANAZPci2d4RCp
185Please respect copyright.PENANAdywzRYObNN
奇怪了,她又不是失戀,只是和他說話的機會減少而已,自己在發什麼神經。185Please respect copyright.PENANAiE4uv9QMbQ
185Please respect copyright.PENANAjBkgyvT9z1
半個下午都過得魂不守舍,難道這個人是她過活必須的能量嗎?185Please respect copyright.PENANANHhkF7nfFl
185Please respect copyright.PENANADBHvROSuHH
她腹誹了一會,手動刪掉輸入框的文字,重新輸入。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAA7ummrIJ84
185Please respect copyright.PENANAyr0nR2RUp0
——「在嗎?」不對。185Please respect copyright.PENANAp2Gi3S5OCg
185Please respect copyright.PENANAzPFL5lE2aK
意圖太明顯了。185Please respect copyright.PENANACkud0oAp29
185Please respect copyright.PENANA67DztGzDjY
——「你在幹麼?」也不對,這樣未免太故意了點。185Please respect copyright.PENANASmJYPrT7se
185Please respect copyright.PENANAPUfi2fMqsU
她猶豫著要發什麼訊息,最終還是沒發,盯著那個對話框框發怔。185Please respect copyright.PENANAkyWNlW3M9F
185Please respect copyright.PENANALIUF2ddSjU
幾分鐘後,向菱挪動指尖,點按幾下手機,忽然突發奇想決定給他取個名稱備註。185Please respect copyright.PENANAUBIHW4KB2l
185Please respect copyright.PENANAm0c8QHkB8b
指尖在空白的名稱框裡停頓了下。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA6Xy1blHsrB
185Please respect copyright.PENANA71A55qIdYT
然後,她沒什麼猶豫的從手機鍵盤裡戳出一個「?」,想表示神秘又行蹤不明的意味。185Please respect copyright.PENANAIXaKdhfYEU
185Please respect copyright.PENANAZG5JLQL7Ed
三秒鐘後又迅速刪掉,默默改成了別的內容。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAsmCxtnk7eV
185Please respect copyright.PENANAsMmD4q2HEC
她怔了幾秒才按下確定按鈕,看著新備註,她突然覺得心裡樂得不行,唯一美中不足的是她有些羞恥。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAcaIRzy902K
185Please respect copyright.PENANAylyk2Gmzq6
新備註:「我才不喜歡他」。 185Please respect copyright.PENANApwn3JHlDwh
185Please respect copyright.PENANAPVRPlERe4H
看著新取的備註,少女的唇角壓抑不住地往上翹。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAsSLE5ryyUN
185Please respect copyright.PENANAH8xs69khCF
她還在傻笑,一則新訊息突然從底部彈出,對方的訊息竟然主動來了。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA17oiosvyE5
185Please respect copyright.PENANAwUJou8suGv
祁澈極少主動找她,所以向菱有點驚訝又有點愉悅,她點擊訊息閱讀。185Please respect copyright.PENANA3yGvTuuWEw
185Please respect copyright.PENANAz1mhdf1Bct
那封簡訊,簡單直接而且很有他的風格,只有一句「在嗎」,甚至沒有附上標點符號。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAbglxv0h5Lu
185Please respect copyright.PENANA1KYB8vLWKN
向菱本來打算秒回,但突然想起言恬的話,於是便退出聊天框,刻意延遲了幾分鐘才回覆。185Please respect copyright.PENANAnNB5tCoszb
185Please respect copyright.PENANAxWjvh4L9V2
……意義不明的舉動,大概只有這麼傻的人才幹得出來。185Please respect copyright.PENANAoH8v08XiME
185Please respect copyright.PENANAjknkquBLZV
向菱:「在。」185Please respect copyright.PENANAJWC9yG99cK
185Please respect copyright.PENANA7N7cTKtbbT
突然有些好奇對方給她取什麼備註。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAbkP7YgsIMI
185Please respect copyright.PENANA7smP6GJu8s
對面的訊息停頓了幾秒,像是在斟酌怎麼開始,然後才發送過來:「你在男生宿舍嗎。」185Please respect copyright.PENANAX7wmSNEZNj
185Please respect copyright.PENANAlB8x53EJ1X
教室換座位之後,向菱還是經常找祁小波玩耍,熟悉之後變得像姊妹一般親暱。185Please respect copyright.PENANAjDxLduYOoS
185Please respect copyright.PENANArBwGCv8s5x
——只是,她很少在宿舍碰到祁澈。185Please respect copyright.PENANAy5b1Yb11hm
185Please respect copyright.PENANAkXB2wjXoWg
想想也對,他似乎極為頻繁的打工。記得某天她路過魚市,碰見他在那裡幫忙一個老人將新鮮的魚隻裝進大袋子。185Please respect copyright.PENANAz88lnKfvC9
185Please respect copyright.PENANA8UaSdEdrzI
她知道他每天固定蹺掉的那節午休,都是去給祁小波帶飯的,但這不為其他人知道。185Please respect copyright.PENANAZt0MykT5MQ
185Please respect copyright.PENANA1yKjnQSvaS
向菱回覆:「祁小波感冒了啊,你早上說的,所以我今天沒過去。」185Please respect copyright.PENANAGk7t7KkV46
185Please respect copyright.PENANAMEr8kCbe8h
「怎麼了嗎?」她敲下這行,然後送出。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAZ2f38thvQi
185Please respect copyright.PENANAYHMhfoOwm4
訊息傳送到網路彼端,很快已讀,接著對方的文字沒幾秒又傳過來,「明天也別去那裡。」185Please respect copyright.PENANAOO4rGaGRZO
185Please respect copyright.PENANAB6cPEk8A4C
——向菱不懂他的意思。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAELRXgIf59U
185Please respect copyright.PENANA8ZYg8DBi2s
她用一隻手指戳出單個符號:「?」185Please respect copyright.PENANAAjHTBq3nnx
185Please respect copyright.PENANADCNOFEkKo2
這一次,祁澈的訊息許久沒有傳來回覆,久到她差點以為他網路掉線了。185Please respect copyright.PENANA6NHMs4GbNR
185Please respect copyright.PENANAnYg80a0RqI
從以前到現在,還是第一次出現這種情況。185Please respect copyright.PENANAMr4hLmcw4o
185Please respect copyright.PENANAbU0C7kZbHV
她常和祁小波玩,他沒阻止過。她經常去男生宿舍遛達,和小女孩一起亂翻他的東西,他也沒拒絕過。185Please respect copyright.PENANAOq0BPmNSaB
185Please respect copyright.PENANAW9vIXMJarD
向菱有點錯愕,心想這人的態度轉換得有些過快。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA5ufMOulH4u
185Please respect copyright.PENANA4DshnpJFYb
她故作玩笑的發送,「你是被盜號了?」 185Please respect copyright.PENANAl96HJYDBlY
185Please respect copyright.PENANAxLFIRLJXx5
「沒。」否認得倒還挺快。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAXFtVchRb9H
185Please respect copyright.PENANAy6UAq3WbxN
「那是怎麼了?我和小波約好明天要去公園盪鞦韆的。」 185Please respect copyright.PENANAbmBNeSvVma
185Please respect copyright.PENANAxK34EVLX93
「抱歉。」 185Please respect copyright.PENANARsRXmwkxDE
185Please respect copyright.PENANAUJP3l9TrOI
少女打字的手驀地僵住了。185Please respect copyright.PENANABw3K7KsB1s
185Please respect copyright.PENANAsSEaIUpQet
其實她的第一反應是——這傢伙居然會道歉啊?真稀奇。185Please respect copyright.PENANA6aQJ6jNhVj
185Please respect copyright.PENANAja5uGYx5Jg
緊接著她的思緒是這樣運轉的:等一下,他真的在道歉嗎?靠,好像是認真的,不對,他幹麼道歉?185Please respect copyright.PENANAmgUFF7o2UW
185Please respect copyright.PENANAPE9KCiiB5N
為什麼要和她說抱歉?185Please respect copyright.PENANAK0elBaQrF9
185Please respect copyright.PENANA2Hzvliog9k
一瞬間,她的腦子像是過載了,運轉不過來,甚至倏地空白。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAgiiaV5tA6d
185Please respect copyright.PENANAQIiz01COTT
這算什麼,變相拒絕還是撇清關係? 185Please respect copyright.PENANAfAfbx9RNVE
185Please respect copyright.PENANAXdJ5fmWPDL
她首先聯想到的是電視上的八點檔連續劇。185Please respect copyright.PENANAOBS8ndllEQ
185Please respect copyright.PENANA1wZiAWrFig
對不起我們不要再打擾彼此了、就這樣結束吧、再這樣下去也不會有結果……為什麼她滿腦子都是這種沒梗的俗濫台詞。185Please respect copyright.PENANADtxdb1HHwc
185Please respect copyright.PENANAtsVDFptvIz
突然就慌亂了起來。185Please respect copyright.PENANAzFEZ6Nbu9M
185Please respect copyright.PENANA4qn6qZgjUg
但是喜歡一個人的心思,本來就是很敏感的,她知道自己反應不應該這麼大,因為一句抱歉。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAL1VRdKBkZ4
185Please respect copyright.PENANAivuIXYG5gn
又或者因為失去了一種可能「巧遇」他的機會。185Please respect copyright.PENANAxKPBKwCvZ2
185Please respect copyright.PENANAUTfCNIytpp
少女開始胡思亂想,腦袋一團暴亂。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA7yfwj27kQb
185Please respect copyright.PENANAKZT9VGW8d0
難道他已經意識到她的喜歡,於是決定開始疏遠她了嗎? 185Please respect copyright.PENANARzDKJTow9O
185Please respect copyright.PENANAN9qtSzODfv
她陷入一種莫名的恐慌裡,像是憑空懸浮於半空中,踩不到地板,像是失重。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAiQy14cKhyF
185Please respect copyright.PENANAImhAPNxvUM
這種感覺,一點都不踏實。 185Please respect copyright.PENANA3cH1zz4H4K
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_185Please respect copyright.PENANAJQaUDuzC5I
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窗外陰雨綿綿,烏雲潛伏在暗色裡,連消失都悄然無聲。185Please respect copyright.PENANAtTvrvYV84F
185Please respect copyright.PENANAaQAV7cEmTo
隔天是周休,但向菱絲毫開心不起來。185Please respect copyright.PENANAlaOQuRjT3I
185Please respect copyright.PENANARZBSHBpyiU
她一旦變得鬱悶,就經常直接倒頭就睡,因為現實讓她覺得很累,睡眠做夢反倒是最好的去處。185Please respect copyright.PENANAdsCJiYHCeR
185Please respect copyright.PENANAmU8GJQxmw2
室友們見慣了她假日睡長覺的習慣,都見怪不怪,放輕了動靜,不驚擾到少女。185Please respect copyright.PENANAxV3VFeiVZx
185Please respect copyright.PENANAoUtHwMDDxM
她睡得比平時更晚了一點。185Please respect copyright.PENANA6i8Ejv8NB4
185Please respect copyright.PENANAxmHL4KfnwL
下午起床時,她覺得胃臟空得發慌,腳步沉重虛浮,囫圇拆了幾包糖果餅乾了事。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAJrHPtIR0j7
185Please respect copyright.PENANAiyCsmSc7CA
過了一小段時間,向菱才打起精神訂外賣。185Please respect copyright.PENANAwnz8Rk8oYY
185Please respect copyright.PENANAkpWvrGnhuo
簡單而隨便的向室友們打了招呼,她覺得自己的話音有氣無力。 185Please respect copyright.PENANAHAweBaCqN4
185Please respect copyright.PENANA0v13LT0Wlz
半小時後,她坐在床上吃著外賣便當,一邊打開手機給言恬發訊息。185Please respect copyright.PENANArFx3ibuqI7