Okay, here's some background knowledge. I post dad jokes daily (well, almost daily), and I finally can put them to good use. I hope it's okay that I just lumped basically all my jokes into one entry.
Why did the ghost use the elevator?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoj8juJOvH0
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To lift his spirits.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpExYLRkCk
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What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ23lm8H7Vo2
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYD1iqKePbV
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxl7J023v9Z
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Claude.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYe88bGzdf
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Why did the number of parking tickets spike when Persephone was carried off to the Underworld?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9LHsk4FOTn
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nPvwhlXuE
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Demeter wasn't working.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMwsR868tc
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Yesterday I was washing my car with my son.
He said, "Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh7coyArA7u
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Genie: What is your final wish?
Kid: I wish I were you.
Genie: Weurd, but alrught.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPShtY2J2M
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What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoBIYht71dv
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡizuS4nDueD
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWRmKRKN0A
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"Bison."562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwH0KuMcCeq
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Bread is like the sun.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2AypY3J9u
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5qn2mPXYG
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg8kVUMdJ2X
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It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhAQ3B88f2s
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A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
"You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!"
The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0CtFBGfhhZ
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What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12oYeGrjuZ
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM4F3DQtD45
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8z3CseKY76
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Its butt.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34KqClIwlo
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Two windmills are standing on a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9EE2eFKmwY
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How do you get a farm girl to marry you?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIqcAgK55Xl
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLpzLDrNlw
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQn2Pt6Rwp
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First, a tractor.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2gQBRbqk0
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Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. But if you remove it, you get...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zbP5K8bKK
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Gravy.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5WBPj3nOW
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Medusa caught the eye of a street musician.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZjyEfpXv6A
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Iul4XC0z4
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb65ihXTJKC
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Now he's a rockstar.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5xTxwVr6JL
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A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after almost 6 months. She asked the doctor about her baby.
The doctor said, "You had twins, a girl, and a boy. They're both fine. Your brother named them for you."
The woman said, "No! My brother is an idiot! What did he name the girl?"
The doctor replied, "Denise."
The woman said, "Oh, that's pretty. What about the boy?"
The doctor let out a deep sigh, and said, "Denephew."562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCa3lSduoDl
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Do trees poop?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg9FY3YnYpz
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...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMAHa9Q9Ww
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Of course they do. How else would we get #2 pencils?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ZN95vT8u0
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What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXtbeiLlqKD
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkcsWqrXAu9
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlOlzcb7u7P
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZihXlKzMY
A "do-you-think-he-saurus."562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzOvSeKRwPk
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Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBvG0wwBgI
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg4fHmpWx49
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3IOBotCLO
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She couldn't control her pupils.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtu5AFrH4Eb
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What do peppers do when they're angry?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyske8U2nE
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFyILZZEUPb
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBWgJKsRrW9
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSckIvcRBbm
They get jalapeño face.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BEuDAvOxo
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Today someone told me I am average.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTem3dhFg2
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfR9xB6neZb
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKp8jnKEFI
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I told them that's just mean.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIb9rwTEAX
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What do you call a pencil with two erasers?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOixOnPhYzw
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPTyanQT6N
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NwUKAYNLt
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8RepXhDRx
Pointless.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8HArelBSgt
---562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3SFofmrgsI
Dude 1: "Hey bro?"
Dude 2: "Yeah bro?"
Dude 1: "Can you hand me that pamphlet?"
Dude 2: "Brochure."562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0UdDk5CcrE
---562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmeWEcB7fyw
Did you hear about the racing snail who got rid of his shell?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfGCxA3pXhM
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RQaViP49t
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡovn0DUDHt7
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡozgH4vSHRe
He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCNVAhNS5a
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Have you ever tried to catch fog?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFN7jtnT5J
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfoeUZ0ms3
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAH9RQoNlBD
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I tried yesterday but I mist.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4d4YtwGf8b
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Why can't you ever run through a campsite?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQ3jWTsBiG
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfNMCeP5xX
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxAACrXKTTK
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS1DrGrmowB
You can only ran—it's always past tents.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGlzLxzCFVF
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What country's capital is growing the fastest?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI40jcEBeUb
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHlCwQRNXE
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbfWHzbcnL
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ28o9UOvzVl
Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp09xhViHad
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What has four wheels and flies?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaRCnQNRxu
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfEqEnvcXc
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqr3ZAbusoA
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A garbage truck.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRcF7CXI5h2
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I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4h1NxlF5Jm
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJqWu84atN
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrJIVv4RG4
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofUEjjXjjq
...so I pushed her over.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4HdG9uP8s
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMj0jqyyav1
562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mLseueff5
...562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNts286u3wx
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If they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiKEzczVd3
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562Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxmHVahWEJ
Uh, yeah. That's all I got.
ns216.73.216.94da2
