It was a VERY strong wind that day, and I absolutely swear to god that none of it was my fault. Seriously, guys. It was the WIND that knocked my umbrella into that dork's face. And his coffee fell too, rolling away. I explicitly articulated my most SINCEREST apologies and how I was just as much publicly humiliated as him.
"What is wrong with you-- I'm Gabe by the way--," he took my gloved hand to shake before returning to his nuclear meltdown. "--And what is wrong with you, coming out of nowhere, a ninja slash cat monkey assaulting my vulnerability, battering me to a pulp, leaving me struggling within in an inch of my life. I have asthma, you brute. Precious people like me die from wheezing. How dare you."
"I am MIRANDA," I shrug at Gabe. "Guess I am TOO MUCH of a woman for you."1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZWTMnhu3K
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpxV3P5Csi
With the last word, I STRUT away. A minute later, it grew apparent he won't let that happen. He ran to my side, stammering and BLUBBERING like a fool.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHRRE4xHj2
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkTdjR6R2t
"Now, just wait a gosh-darned second here!" Gabe raised a finger. I kept a straight face when inside I just wanted to LOL. "You still owe me coffee-- and for mangling my face-- who knows if I ever see you again."1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwe8Juqh8nS
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVRLYxUdH7
"I did not MANGLE your face! The wind did! Your face is not mangled, your face is perfectly FINE!" I huffed, realizing we stood outside the cafe. "I am being blackmailed and entrapped. I am not okay with it!"1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnl4G87HPnK
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeX2DfFC8KE
The clouds roared back, and rain shattered. I fought with the umbrella.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvdq2AobO2
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8JOWZV60i0
"So it's a date!" Gabe shouted over the hysteria. 1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvP3G5det2K
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqucBRSoQY6
"NO. GOODBYE FOREVER." I stormed off into the storm, wrestling with the umbrella and the wind. It took until the stoplight when Gabe ran up at the moment the wind grew VERY strong again. I swear to god, it was NOT ME the first time and it was STILL not me the second time. SMACK.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGioH9am35
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWL7fDEa6vf
The umbrella slapped Gabe ... again. I SHRIEKED in horror.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA5458QCImj
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOESYzlXm4X
"What is wrong with you-- ," Gabe said as the pedestrian sign lit up and chased me across the splashing street. "-- I think I'm bleeding! Am I bleeding? My poor mangled face. You may rob me of my coffee and my dignity but you can't get rid of me that easy, infernal murderess. A menace to society, I say! We are all in danger!"
"Then stay FAR away from me!" 1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡchiiwltr4O
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MQQEHK0Vb
Gabe took my gloved hand, and at that moment our hair rose. White lightning struck -- shocking us both. We keeled over, tased and jolted in waves until it was over. We glanced at each other with fresh and cooked eyes. Smoke steamed from our bodies. Boots were knocked from our feet. We marveled that we were electrocuted and somehow miraculously survived. I nodded, "Okay... Coffee sounds good right now..."1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEN3bTCgPEl
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjd5UR3ijEA
"So it's a date, Miranda," Gabe said, pleased. "That is spectacular."1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2L0Fj9ITBJ
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAG1Gqt5BX5
"It is NOT a date," I insisted. "This is strictly normal and boring. People get hit by lightning all the time, Gabe."1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEt8y5CqTI
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3CCmmQPINQ
"And you're buying!" He pointed an accusing finger.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd2GD30Xryf
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72JggP1gxk
"No, if anything it is YOU who are buying," I bickered. 1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2x6mILMu2
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50fdpLaDr6
"If I'm buying, ergo it's a date."1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjnwxKFMYc
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5K2JiFJv8
"NOPE. WRONG. Regardless of someone buying, it is NOT--"1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCn6KqUHWUf
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwuwVyLmdSe
We got struck by white lightning twice and wound up in the hospital, in the same room, with a curtain drawn between us. We spent hours staring at the ceiling arguing whose fault it was and how awful the coffee were here.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKMXcNEOemO
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQfEYqmtsDs
Then his voice stopped. I looked at the curtain, hearing a droning flatline. I tore the curtain back. He was off the machine, leaning in for a kiss.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzc3oppblne
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Vy1czczyB
"Kiss me?" 1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9ke3Be96t
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvrabjhxg9
It was so OBVIOUS he was going to be my husband.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLeFNCmlJlC
So OBVIOUS he was going to be the father of my child.1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6D0bDapoB
Gabe. That sweet dork. How can I not love him? 1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3uEJUiUzTb
1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAm3YNfLWQ
"No, you kiss me," I said. His eyes closed, as if to melt.
In our hospital gowns, we locked lips. And the rest?1142Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVpLx57eKq
The rest was, as they say, a WEIRD love story.
