Doctors' offices have always made me immensely uncomfortable. You never get through immediately; there's always a fifteen minute and up waiting period.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGr2kCprrqW
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiipDvqmjhl
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1RBb1RRoJ8
In that amount of time, someone as imaginative as myself can think a vast number of ways in which something could be severely wrong with me, because you're never at the doctor if you're alright.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMq4yWRS4IL
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOd9cywRf8
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvXzH6v9R7
Today, however, I'm at the doctor's office and I'm almost sure that there's nothing physically wrong with me.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlawft61G84
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsOAIJfozch
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZkMcPF5Tlq
It's what's inside of me that's the problem.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODgXl2fXvk
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVa4rca4OF
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwaSIeOLJz
You see, I made the brilliant decision to have unprotected sex, which has landed me here, in a doctor's office, wanting to "make sure" that I'm actually pregnant, as if three positive pregnancy tests aren't proof enough. 868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGBnaEELl8O
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ743xQu19y8
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKG43DP8ZQ
Despite the knowledge that it is highly unlikely that I am not pregnant, I still hope; and with that hope comes nervousness.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9LC9vlfDT
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqg1cmHxeR8
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjHvBrZ8t3
My palms are clammy and I'm constantly alternating between bouncing my knees and tapping my feet against the tiled floor. The receptionist is looking at me with a concerned expression, as if expecting me to have a full blown panic attack, and to be honest, I'm somewhere pretty near to that.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DysgDJfbT
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ61yO5nySkA
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYRkKVJ0sN
In an attempt to calm myself, I pull out my phone and play Candy Crush. It doesn't help. 868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsN5RDPbwtI
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbS5QMa8ttV
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJKDQibxRV
I plug in my earphones and try to listen to some music, but after two minutes, I realise that I don't even know what the hell I'm listening to; it could be classical music, or rap music. I wouldn't know.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHu4YbK0XvM
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FU0ugmdm4
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhAEEiBn8HW
I rip out the earbuds in frustration, and lean back in my chair, closing my eyes.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GNrtHDpTo
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WXnsEvYSK
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcr2KIPht0
"Miss, would you like some water?" the receptionist asks, startling me.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlF6nvx1ckV
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBUVVGEMXPH
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfvXIfimDH
In my fit of irritation, I forgot that she was there.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc6E2DmM6yx
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4R2cxwK3Um
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PTMahzO89
"Yes, thank you," I reply in what I hope is a calm voice, but even to my own ears, it sounds harsh.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJA440wyI30
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCqZufomeY
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGNbaR18Vv
She dips below the desk and comes back up with a small unopened bottle of water.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQODnyVd3mL
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtwO7fBhsM
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vrxQdIueb
"Thank you," I say to her, as she passes me the bottle.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOGbYWbVJb
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccIiVC3aYQ
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqiFUNEBZG
"You're welcome," is her reply. She looks as if she wants to say more, but she's cut off by the ringing of her phone.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLYnt6PWCw
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcI3LOWpt4
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFA3XK3x39
She picks it up, and has the briefest of conversations, before saying, "Dr.Davidson is ready to see you now.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCjEIiagJR
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVg9jp6Nvz
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyW8q7xErcS
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO2GiKjcMph
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vRb1DNQCl
*•*•*•*868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡir1usTeaqn
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1mzjrZOUr
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96rXaidOMl
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6zbtyh632
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszRxX2KDKN
I'm shaking like a colt trying to walk for the first time.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeV1Rpv0PFZ
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgl4bVatK7
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ms62R5XJY
"Sit," the doctor insists, pretending not to notice my nervousness.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxy82rumHvn
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBiowyQxwnt
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrUf35sdGe
"So, tell me exactly what's going on," he says, looking me in the face.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBAxocEhSp
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDEwIYLXiLz
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHByOGRFvd
"I fucked without a condom, and now I think I'm pregnant."868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblk5eVQlel
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Zdpo5NFpR
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjzGLjF9ASm
"Okay," he replies, completely unfazed by my bluntness. "Lets find out," he says, sounding like Dora the Explorer.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGhlvgNYmq2
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAgFnuUAdS
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSCbCFSZweq
And for some reason, on some level, I don't want to explore this, because it feels as if not investing it will make the problem sublime and diffuse, but I know it won't.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2SFD3suscC
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8gD8Q1k6I
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBnZVXB5va
"Put this on, and change," the doctor tells me, handing me the gown that patients use to cover themselves.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0766C0AaL
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGPYXCfbSPl
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡouwtPaQzNf
He does an overall examination before the test, but to be honest, I'm not there; I tell him "no" when he asks if I'm experiencing pain during the breast and pelvic examinations, but apart from that, I'm gone.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY1mbx8nItw
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKRoZNTFYq
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEHhAgHZJ7
"Okay. It's too early to see the baby doing an external ultrasound, so I'm going to have to do a trans-vaginal ultrasound."868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1qBMLNprXr
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQBnRVpftv
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GREQdTz0Z
All I hear is the word "ultrasound"; my heart beat skyrockets.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkUMYTQIVZu
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWK233DiIN8
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0iVh0LKJr
He must be misreading my expression, because he suddenly try's to reassure me.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJxY5bEy9AC
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGp01FD8LrI
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheTYJ6J6Ml
"It won't be painful—"868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs6jj7atBMy
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡga3ygcHB0j
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Jk2IKCPel
"That's not it. I don't want a baby,"868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXliN0zRZk
I reply, and god does it feel good to finally say those words out loud to someone.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKIiTiJgkN
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW4H3QkOEfd
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkoBJfgNztz
I've thought them many times, but there's this sense of release that comes with saying it out loud, like taking a shit after holding it in for an entire day (if you're one of those people who finds shitting in public to be absolutely terrifying, such as yours truly).868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLeW6zQX9x
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBlXYskaZzO
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE6QKMuTC3e
He gives me a sympathetic look, but says nothing, and for that I'm grateful.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyhsq3BAU8D
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhAOIOTmgjo
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoYRF2hN6W
What would he say? 'It's okay'? 'You'll be a great mother'? 868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYQ00LRB7r
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfPXHaIxDlR
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Ra87WO2Bc
I hate it when people know absolutely nothing about you, but suddenly become your personal counsellor once they hear a sentence of your life. If I were the kind of person to divulge my personal information and feelings, then maybe, I'd take their advice, but since you they nothing about me, it's just annoying.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3q57SKpCnw
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPP9N7wlATu
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq6YGjNRsrP
He's talking to me now, preparing for the ultrasound and telling me what will happen, but I can't concentrate on what he's saying.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjUeSvJwXRU
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6HwCPQdjh
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPBqN8FixU
However, as I feel the cold probe enter me, it feels so... final. Like the final nail to my coffin.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAHxdRJYj4E
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoTVvzP7MwB
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq00mx3D3Dc
This is it.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGp0mbHQDk
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBDEZINyff
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWR5L5YkZRJ
He turns off the light so that he can see the image on the ultrasound screen, and that screen is now the only major source of light in the room, begging to be looked at, but I can't do it.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxRlsrLN6V
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJTOXzRe40
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaTnAyIuk1
"Well..." Dr. Davidson says, sounding surprised, but not in a good way.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEkjdXb9ot
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEbqdsnBYQ6
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogNXn6AJGG
I start to shake, trembling so hard that the paper covering the cot on which I am laying begins to rattle loudly.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlx4TXyPw6
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWnXhC6VR2
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlrqFwLmEl
"Miss Quinn, the good news is, you're not pregnant", he says.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcskl3KiINy
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbpmOQNddzH
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpvK2EujuG
I freeze.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi30Hdz84sF
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBeqx4VfA8
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHsXgpHTepp
Then I breathe.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwciCMoYGr
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpTWBWqnMp7
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6m7hr0wk4
I let out a loud breath of relief, as relief is my automatic response to hearing something like that in a situation like this.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs3vOpWKPQY
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrUDfS9YcS
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMs0DuwCip
However, as soon as that breath is released, I 868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExWt3YhDAC
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqKkZdFVq8Z
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡam6RA88V91
1) remember that Dr. Davidson seems unpleasantly surprised, 868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9CJOguXYAe
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfesbr3GuMH
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdd0MQI5DXQ
2) realise that he said "the good news is"; that means that there's bad news, too, and868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTDzQPZrIG
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2amQ8YDRJ
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPmJmL7sM5
3)realise that he is still inspecting my insides with the probe, frowning at the screen.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR1KoFc3Lqc
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG6tZqHt44z
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvd5acJ5eI
Something isn't right.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5UrOoRVWO
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwJ61PQQKx
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gtUbGeepF
"Dr. Davidson, what's wrong?" I ask, sounding like a nervous wreck all over again.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpHuT9rAlq
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfl0AgpA4Uc
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBrIocpima
He continues to look at the screen, and I can see that he knows exactly what is wrong with me; it's just one of those moments in which you try to figure out how to phrase something in the best way possible so as to lessen the blow.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMO3xAiSLrY
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGe81qzuK2e
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ywxUDCrtk
He sighs, and pulls the probe out, then switches off the machine.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4roeg3X47
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwQnMT3odk
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0cVfqDuzj
"Your condition is in no way life-threatening, Miss Quinn," he states, it might just cause complications in the future."868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcQDRnG1ms
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKERJMuZGc
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMNwY1CkgU
"Do you mind telling me what my condition is, before I shit myself?" I snarl as he turns on the light and hands me a wad of tissue paper.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKw8buLIxV
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2AdtXmPgq
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSkacdyDp1
His lips twitch. 868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bNE63AmxL
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtFN2ILFH0
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRZVEnPLph
"You've been nothing but nervous since you stepped into my office. I said that so that you wouldn't shit yourself."868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp5NFuGVgk1
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaXNI9LVhpz
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokkSXtX08t
Through my nervousness I have to smile at him.868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEW4Ueuzk0m
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ604ZjGCwzE
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDRW5axsPyb
"Okay so what do I have?"868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJciv2KJCO
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PAImNqg5U
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV831pvNr0k
"Miss Quinn, you have fibroids."868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbWpbRgmqZu
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmdNVPr1R8E
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Snpj8CFZ5
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeuMvyL2mpn
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWNNRz3Ai7l
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNKdSBvl9D
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIuYMCRPlg
868Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKWyl5C3Wn
