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I am quietly installed in my office. This is my own place, in this family home. Far from the adventures of my children, I appreciate being able to breathe calmly from time to time. There, I decompress and take the time to think, to drown myself in my thoughts, in my memories.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhOJqvdJJmc
Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I quickly slip the photo I had been looking at for several minutes into the pocket of my blouse, and pretend to be concentrating on a file. I barely have time to say, “Come in” when the door opens to reveal my daughter. At seventeen and a half years old, she has behaved like a real tornado since the start of her adolescence, four years earlier. However, in her face framed by long brown hair, childhood can still be seen.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdHeE5pUE7
— Mom, I need to talk to you about something super important ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡII3pztXoYx
I suppress a smile. With Orlane, everything is always mega important ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwHkZpxqUx
— Ok I hear you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaMcdEP873V
— With Alexandra, we would like to get a tattoo ! She says, excited, as if it’s the best news of the year.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqm83CK8ytm
— A tattoo ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPGhdbcaSB
She nods energetically.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrli130c9hM
— While you are still a minor ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRaKxleWGMW
— Soon to be an adult.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzKFgLWg6F
— Yes, so seventeen years and counting.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlpRwv1rpDi
— If you say so. So, is it yes ? I need parental consent to do this.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT6djeEVDiq
— No way ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSwpilZBoIC
As I expected, my daughter's face turns an angry red, while her light eyes darken.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCcIEXBARd
— You never let me do anything cool ! She shouts, slamming the door behind her.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJ39bLKAwQ
Another of these great classics is to avoid any discussion by taking long strides. I hear him scream.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHtqRWvRJV
— She always forbids me from everything ! She’s never there for us ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY41uHWkdRN
— You exaggerate ! Mom is always there whenever we need her, tries to calm my son down in a paternalistic tone.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHkLX2a1IU
Calm, thoughtful and very mature in nature for a young man of sixteen, my son has a character that is the polar opposite of that of his sister.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEM6ztdDJnh
— She’s not a cool mother ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IWY06XN7Y
I decide to join them in the kitchen.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnNFdGKEU5N
— If being fashionable means letting you drink alcohol, do drugs, let you date anyone, or allow you to get tattoos, then no, I'm not cool...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe58ah9dnc9
— But why don’t you want to ? After all, it’s just a little drawing on the skin, adds my daughter with a pout.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbubQeaoMe
My God, how tenacious she is… Like me ultimately.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6g0GqA382
— Orlane, the day you want to get a tattoo for a good reason, I will accept, but not to be like your friends.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfX3dnXkQth
My son looks at us, imperturbable.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnGlEeTsX4
— You definitely have a tattoo ! She accuses me, angrily.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3o9V7quASF
I look down, weighing the pros and cons, and end up telling them : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WdPK1W4gj
— Follow me to the living room, both of you. I need to talk to you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcP99iWzyU4
Without a word, they accompany me, and each sit in one of the large armchairs, facing mine.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9oOtaOBZ5
— You are both old enough now for me to tell you a story. And please don't interrupt me. The story I am about to tell you is personal to me, but it is important that you know it, because it has made us who we are.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8isiO4Iq7F
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It all started on September 26, 1991 : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJNqQrKZuj9
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Autumn has not yet arrived although the leaves of the trees are starting to turn red under the less intense rays of the sun.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZ7LiYI62o
I detail my reflection while doing my hair in front of the mirror. I don't think I'm pretty, although many people tell me otherwise. I'm not very tall, I don't have the figure of a top model, in fact, I find myself rather ordinary. Not to mention this damn hair that refuses to stay styled the way I want it ! Giving up trying to tame them, I abandon my hairbrush and go down the stairs of the house. I'm so happy to be in high school where I'm now one of the big guys. Sixteen is the age where my real life begins, the age where my parents finally treat me like an adult and no longer like an immature child. The age when all dreams are achievable and desires possible.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgaYdjAFh2
My mind escapes for a moment to fly towards Chad, my boyfriend of several months. Chad is young, handsome, athletic and intelligent when he manages to stay focused long enough on his homework instead of thinking about sports, which is hard for him. He's not very tall, but built like a sportsman : all muscles. I like his black hair in a crew cut, and his hazel eyes. We have known each other since childhood. I had been secretly in love with him for years. In high school, I was known for being the type of serious girl, always top of the class, which did not attract boys, much to my despair. Chad is the most popular boy in school, so there was no chance he would be interested in me until a teacher asked me to help him with math. When he finally asked me to go out with him, I couldn't believe it anymore.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Pg0liTBkC
For six months, Chad and I have been in perfect love...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU11mcj0Cfc
Okay, we only exchanged chaste kisses, we don't go out much, instead spending our time watching movies at his house. I also admit that contrary to what I had always imagined, I don't feel this passion that romance novels boast about, perhaps this is due to the fact that we have few things in common. When Chad kisses me, I have the horrible feeling of kissing my best friend but I’m sure that with time, our story will become more intense, passionate and that this feeling will disappear. After all, he’s the one I always wanted so everything will work out in the end.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsNjoO4NbG
Letting out a romantic sigh, I enter the kitchen. Almost my entire family is gathered there : Ashley and John, my parents as well as Nina, my younger sister. The only thing missing is Nicolas, my big brother who recently left for New York University and who only comes home for the holidays.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr8UOAGQP9l
— My little Megan… The more I see you, the less you look like my baby, my mother laments, staring at me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZhp95eO9NO
She isn’t very tall, she has a face with soft features that charms most people she meets. I get her brown hair and blue eyes from her. She always expresses herself calmly, but with conviction.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknShPv5lTh
I act as if his rantings don't matter to me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpu4U4YpA3u
— Mom, I’ll always be your daughter. And then, you have Nina as a baby…466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVS7DvpmM6J
My sister makes a face. At thirteen, she sees herself more as a teenager than as the youngest member of the family.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDN5VM6R8wD
— Are you still planning to go to Chad’s party tonight ? How many will you be ? Asks my father before swallowing his coffee.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2N2cNdguqC
— Yes I’m going. There will be about fifty of us.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1glXpRkFe
My father coughs and chokes.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKTadCk0D3
— That much ? Ask my mother in turn.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAb3AblRe6e
I nod yes.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKEk93lGXDX
— There will be the whole class as well as Chad's friends, that's a lot of people, he's very popular at school.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lUPAZCNlb
— That’s true, my father agrees with a touch of pride.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoZBCV9Gdx
Even though he tends to be overprotective, I love my father very much. I find him a handsome man for his age. At forty, his dark brown hair begins to take on gray shades at the temples and expression lines slowly creep into his angular face, further marking his smile and his frown.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfgqPk6FTaH
My father works in construction, his specialty is facade maintenance. He judges each house by the quality of its exterior paint ! My mother is a secretary in a real estate agency, which doesn't excite her, but she has fixed hours, which suits her perfectly. We are a middle class American family. We live in a residential neighborhood in the small town of Millisky, Pennsylvania, where almost everyone knows each other, if only by sight. The town has around five thousand souls. We have a hospital, shops, restaurants, cinemas, and even a large shopping center, so we never get bored. In addition, our town is surrounded by a beautiful forest which allows for long walks, we also have a lake about five kilometers to the south. To the west, a hill overlooks the city, it is the chic district where all the local bourgeois have built their beautiful homes, which most often only serve as second homes. To the north, a highway takes us to Pittsburgh, the nearest major city, a two hour drive, and to the east, Philadelphia is a three hour drive.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5Ezf6biP4
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A little later that day, I'm in the main hallway of the school. It is a large white building, some classrooms have faded walls, originally cream-colored, and the same goes for places of frequent passage. The central corridor has on each side of its walls, two rows of gray lockers stacked on top of each other. I take some books from mine when, turning around, I see a boy of average height, with brown hair and light eyes, walk past me. He looks at me furtively. When I meet his gaze, I feel like I'm falling from a ten- story building. It's a strange thing I've never felt before and it only lasts a few seconds. Coming to my senses, I tell myself that I must be going crazy.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KALSN5O1q
— Not bad, admires Amy, my best friend, who followed my gaze.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ974kO3LVdt
— New student ? I'm asking perfunctorily as I'm sure I've never seen it before.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGAp3UMa91
— I’ll find out, says my friend, narrowing her eyes with interest.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgP8K4ynrEx
— In any case, he’s very cute, I can’t help but point out.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqV5JYT73Oh
— You're the one who says that, even though you're dating the hottest boy in school ! She exclaims, shocked.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo7leR5me3i
I smile, remembering that Chad never wanted to go out with her. He preferred me. It's so rare for a boy to reject her that I know she harbors a little resentment towards me. She has never told me openly but sometimes, like this moment, she throws a little barb at me. Without being mean, it gets heavy some days. However, she has been my friend for so long that I don't see myself falling out with her over such a small matter.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQBT44RRcf
Later that day, in history class, I am fascinated by the documentary that the professor shows us concerning the liberation of Europe during the Second World War. This is not the first report I have seen on the subject but each time, I am caught up in the violence, the abomination of this conflict. When the images of the concentration camps appear on the screen, I look away. This is too hard for me, so I concentrate on a completely different theme. Since the start of the course, I have had the strange sensation of feeling observed. As I turn to scan the class, I see the new student sitting two rows behind me, his eyes fixed on me. When he realizes that I have noticed him, he returns his gaze to the screen. I imitate him but after a few seconds, I turn around again.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyDZJMhuku
Grid ! I thought, giving a hint of a smile as he refocused on the documentary. For long minutes, I no longer dared to move. It's stupid but this boy intimidates me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3swF0XRNL
When the film ends, I turn in my seat to follow the teacher as he walks around the class summarizing what we just saw. The newcomer is still staring at me. His look is indecipherable.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZKqL1H7Nd
— Imagine these families separated during endless years of war, imagine their suffering. If you had been in their place, would you have chosen resignation in the face of the invader or would you have opted for resistance ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7tstjOjkn
I raise my hand, certain of my answer.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Kjy2lU0DE
— Yes Megan.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkKt9SSTPS
— I would have chosen resistance. Faced with injustice, I think I would have been incapable of looking at the situation without taking part in the fight.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBVvbYlcnVi
— Good. Someone else's opinion ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIxfREROG1
Many raise their hands including the new one.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriL7BanaRO
— And you, what do you think ? Asks the teacher, addressing him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLstlMOWYf
— I believe that with hindsight, it is easy to give your opinion, but at that time, people who engaged in the resistance ran enormous risks, not only for themselves but also for those close to them. All this must be taken into consideration.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxHh9bMaZsZ
— Perfect, Jessy ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5xPDss4ith
Jessy… 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmM9f1AZ2Ea
I have a hard time taking my eyes off him even though his name resonates within me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZnJd6Qpkw
— For the next class, you will write me a presentation on this subject, continues the professor.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡilGGdydVHp
The bell announcing the end of classes rings, the new guy immediately picks up his things and leaves, bowing his head. It makes me feel like I'm running away from the whole world.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzhfROaEZt
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I head to the bathroom to put some gloss on my lips and find my friends Amy and Pearl there.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUJIVyMvdN
— So, Meg, where are you with Chad ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKr2UZYpkiI
My cheeks immediately turn red.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9svQKfT5Jg
— There is nothing to say.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7l1xbL3EKC
— Don’t tell us you haven’t done it yet, Amy insists.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdjX8wDmOh
— Well no… Well, I mean, do you feel ready ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF22wkvcP7E
Amy shrugs. I know she hasn't been a virgin for some time.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRNUPpDMCgr
— There’s no reason, Pearl assures. You're with the boy you've always wanted, so why not go all the way ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwj2JwJIbj
These words make me think more than they should. I've been dreaming about Chad for years, so why do I feel this stuck ? Why don't my feelings push me to open up completely ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtqmTloL3I
I feel lost and I know perfectly well that it's not my friends I could confide in. They would immediately judge me, thinking I'm crazy for asking myself a thousand questions when I'm dating a great guy.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRAoItrwtVk
If only Nick were here, I thought with regret.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaE47pkcrW
My brother would be able to advise me perfectly. It's crazy how much I miss him. Looking forward to the next vacation so he can come back to see us.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EGABVW8KA
— By the way, have you seen the new one ? Pearl continues, arranging her brown hair in front of the mirror. He is too beautiful ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAM6QOM97Kh
It’s true that he is beautiful ! A finely sculpted body without being skinny and a face with fine features that I find refined, piercing green eyes lined with long eyelashes, slightly messy light brown hair... I also memorized the little chain with at the end a cross that dangles from his left ear giving him a little rebellious side that I find sexy.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJJ09Y7poU3
— I learned a few things about him...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTwmoKpe0PU
This simple sentence from Amy focuses all my attention.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEDOypJzQE
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A few hours later, at the end of classes, I found my father in the high school parking lot. This day is important to me. I pass my driving license. I am confident, because for several weeks, Chad has been teaching me everything there is to know and, according to him, I am ready.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYK8n9gaP5
— Megan, we need to talk, my father begins.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTj13I8PQT
Already knowing that I am going to be treated to a moral lesson, I hold back a sigh.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGTHEcGm3zQ
— It’s about that party at Chad’s. You know I trust you, but... knowing you with him until late...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4t831NjfKT
When I don't answer, he continues : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡosLtt83DAI
— Will you be… serious this evening ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvmyZhmuEMU
— Dad, I'm still a virgin and I don't plan on that changing tonight.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xfFeC6g2M
— Thank God, he breathes with relief after grimacing.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yhv28ODok
Shortly after, we return home, me with my license in my pocket and my father with the certainty that I am still innocent.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBnhlblWh3
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In the evening, I found Chad at his house. He lives in a large, modern and chic house, close to the city center. Their villa includes three bedrooms with an independent bathroom, a games room, an office, a fully equipped kitchen and a gigantic living room which, that evening, easily accommodated fifty guests. Outside, in a garden, in which my entire house could fit, is a heated swimming pool. As the girlfriend of the owner of the house, I make a grand entrance. I'm wearing a pretty black silk dress, perfectly fitted, which suits me perfectly. I turn heads as I pass, especially Chad who only has eyes for me. The party is in full swing, the whole class has gathered there.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1JY41p5D2
I'm chatting with Amy in the corner of the room, when I spot the new student, Jessy, standing a little further away. He observes me while chatting with Stanley, a friend of my brother. He stares at me and gives me a small smile to which I can't help but respond.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHuyxDe4jg
Why am I blushing ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUqRT2NrVtq
— This guy is so hot. I'm going to go and get to know each other, Amy said to me, scrutinizing Jessy.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7d7Kddv9qu
Without knowing why, my heart sinks.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNxesafkdfK
— Amy…, my reaction is stupid. You look very pretty with this dress.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6W4xFXX2c
She smiles. I see her approach Jessy, Stanley quickly walks away while Amy launches into a tirade, pointing out several people in the room. She must inform him of the gossip that is circulating. I can't help the pang of jealousy that creeps into me when I see her place a hand on Jessy's arm. At this moment, he looks up at me, his expression is indecipherable. I have to look elsewhere... But I can't do it.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOETmcBLQf2
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're having fun ? Chad appears in front of me and places his hands on my hips.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeF9c0Z1Rdp
Finally I take my eyes off Amy and the new guy. I have to think about something other than his green eyes which make me feel like they are penetrating my soul.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYQQ5UdEPC
I place my lips on my boyfriend's in a brief kiss.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiSCVwmxe4C
— Where were you ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsdTa3uGgV
— I was walking around the house. Haven't you noticed that some people look like they've been drunk ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJla7FlnFSH
— Yes, I met Matt earlier, he reeked of alcohol.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AoB1V7Ees
— Great, Chad breathes, annoyed. If my parents find out about this, I'm dead.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡscyAqGIS3c
I glance in Jessy and Amy’s direction. He has disappeared while she returns to us, blowing : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrCXiwV55u
— This guy is weird ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZvqdrh4ke
— What happened with Jessy ? I said, trying to contain my relief.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfbHiwLISz
— I don’t know, I was talking to him and, suddenly, he went out to get some fresh air. Who invited him anyway ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9JPLjhLnyu
— It's me. We had a class together, I told him it would be the best way to meet people.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGvLiJxWiYW
How nice Chad is ! That's why I love him, my heart reminds me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZPFisgPMdn
— I’m going to try to find out who brought the alcohol, he continues.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWLKScvHQAS
— I am coming with you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlB5mnZZ1RA
We leave Amy in the living room and head towards the kitchen. A group of American football players, of which Chad is the quarterback, are seated there.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDuPTn6jOV
— Damn, you guys are annoying ! I warned you though : no alcohol.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOA2ye1USDB
My boyfriend raises his voice.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3idJ6Hwoyl
— Relax, Chad, it's just beers.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82xyjh9TM3
— Beers or not, if my parents find out I'll be in big trouble, get rid of it ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKbKrp9zoFH
The five young people take their bottles while complaining and drop one which spills down the front of my dress.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHAudpIxczi
— It’s clever ! Chad exclaims as I gape.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZeGR2Gqv8
I grab a roll of paper towels and try to wipe the alcohol off, to no avail.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAcDpVoYgO
— Come with me, my boyfriend said, taking me by the hand. I don't mean to be offensive, but you stink of alcohol. We're going to have problems with your parents if you leave like that again.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqITIFPwbf
— I know, it’s because of your stupid friends ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBolSitiYL
— I'm sorry. I have an idea. Go take a shower, and in the meantime, I'll wash and dry your dress and off you go, neither seen nor known ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OGcQdpVJz
Having little choice, I accept.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvgDVnrEoC
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Several minutes later, which seemed like an eternity, I found Chad in his room. I am in my bathrobe and my boyfriend is holding my clean dress in his hands when there is a knock at the door. Neither of us has time to make a move that Amy and Pearl are already initiating. They stand in the doorway, look at us and mutter an apology before closing the door, giggling.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjC4m86DAN9
— Great, they’re going to think anything now, I mutter angrily.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrIRshlPowp
— But no, they are your friends. You just need to explain the situation to them when we get down.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQe4LD6Ach
I'm not convinced, but Chad is right, they are my friends, they will definitely believe me. And then, I have nothing to reproach myself for.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRumqCN95v
Clearly, this evening is far from being the evening I dreamed of ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmoXHFLzse
When we join the guests on the ground floor, I immediately feel that they are staring at me with eloquent little smiles. I'm going to pour myself a glass of non alcoholic punch when Amy and Pearl come to talk to me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU7G2dSNnww
— So, Meg, how was it ? Is Chad as good a shot as he seems ? Amy asks me, with a spark of curiosity in her eyes.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSB0ElqiN8
— What are you talking about ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRZtSqqk9K
— Of you and Chad half naked in his room ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA6VUsAMfy1
— That’s not at all what you think ! Nothing happened ! Some idiots had spilled beer on me. I had to take a shower while Chad cleaned my dress and he was dressed in case you didn't notice ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACBl4XMhmX
It annoys me to have to justify myself as if I had committed a crime.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFxgoiDyg5
— But of course ! Pearl replies, giggling with Amy before walking away towards other students in our class.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahXK8O242J
This story is crazy, and the worst part is that no one wants to believe me, not even my best friends, at least the ones I thought were real friends. The looks that I already found embarrassing became even more insistent, and shame invaded me. It’s a shame to feel this ! Sensing my discomfort, Chad comes to join me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZKj72Z9MiY
— I'm going back.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKvX8PKXJd
— But no, stay, you're not going to let these idiots ruin your evening ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZO96787nP
He hugs me tightly to reassure me, but466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmdqcNZk4L
I gently push him away. There are already enough comments as it is, there is no point in adding more.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoiX82JpHBZ
— No, I'm going back. See you tomorrow ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvVwP7U7vC
Disappointed, he acquiesces. I kiss him on the tips of his lips as we usually do.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKd6ikj4luy
— You don’t want me to take you home ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyo3SexWhTD
— I need to walk...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3nHcXianeg
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfuV5316hzi
It feels good to be alone and to be able to enjoy the peace and quiet of the cool night. The moon just makes a crescent in the sky. Looking up, I admire the stars which, far from everything, don't care about the gossip that runs on Earth. Tears burn my eyes, I feel more alone than ever on this Earth which is definitely not running smoothly.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4h39FwhHk0
— Did you need to get some fresh air ? A soft voice nearby asks, bringing me out of my reverie.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKik3ARvbh
Jessy is by my side, looking up to the sky.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnweB1qTH7j
— Yes. Exactly. You too ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRw7QkBC2SL
This is the first time I've seen him up close. Immediately, my heart races. A small diamond shines in his ear, replacing the cross he wore during the day. Two locks frame his forehead, falling in front of his eyes when he lowers his head. I know I shouldn't stare at him like that, but I can't help it. I feel like an insect attracted by a light that hypnotizes it. He looks at me, gives me a smile. Why do I feel so intimidated around him ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGwcuI8flB
A breath of wind rises, making me shiver. Jessy takes off his black leather jacket and hands it to me, I put it on and thank him. Does he notice my trouble ? I don't know, but from his piercing gaze, I suspect he's enjoying the situation.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68E8NRlKlb
— Yes, I needed to get some fresh air too, I don’t really like crowds. I saw you leaving, I thought maybe you’d like some company ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKVEVR8Iia
— If you want, I shrug casually while being happy that he noticed me. Jessy, is that right ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyq1DFHhJxX
He nods with a smile.
— I'm Meg...
— Megan, I know.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnte5ZcoJCJ
I look at him, surprised.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtpwORw1IOq
— Good. What else do you know about me ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnO9qUf8Wr
— Let’s see… You’re the best student in class, and you’re dating the star player of the football team.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBbjg6Kmv0A
— You're good ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTQnAONI1W
— I guess you must have heard something about me too ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTindYdVMNV
— Not much, actually. I just know that you are seventeen, that you have just arrived in Millisky and that you are repeating your school year.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHQgfBaqZE
— Everything is true. It's not that serious ? What upsets you..., he adds to my astonishment.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jt7P4kQ07
— No, there are much worse things in life. It's nothing, just nonsense.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNG7f5VKiw
— If it’s so harmless, then why did you leave your boyfriend’s party ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcLEmdUeO7m
— Maybe because, this evening, I saw the true faces of my so called friends. My confidence in them melted like snow in the sun.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrjoqdJape
Jessy sighs as she looks up again to look at the starry sky.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmLr2CWsVt
— I know this feeling of disappointment well.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡChnfSN1Bv3
— Did this happen to you too ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCNLmvEHM7
He seems surprised that I am interested in him and turns to me, burying his hands in the pockets of his pants.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckUBF6z841
— To be betrayed, disappointed ? Oh yes ! Although I don't understand why your friends would turn their backs on you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaOtqTEGTs
— Haven't you heard the gossip spread by Amy and Pearl ? They told everyone that I slept with Chad. Even though I told them that this is not the case, they did not believe me, and worse, they preferred to continue to denigrate me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTl6891a189
As I tell him this, I search his eyes to check if he is sincere or if he is making fun of me like the others.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbspf0o44p
— I have learned to no longer listen, and even less believe, what people say out of pure malice or jealousy. I am convinced that you are telling the truth.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfJTVPhmM8
— You seem very sure of yourself for someone who doesn’t know me ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSi18nGA25
He locks his gaze on mine before responding : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN031iD1tt7
— I see in you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5P3aqpJYh3
This response leaves me speechless and upsets me more than it should. Faced with him, with his words, I feel lost. Fortunately, we arrived on my street and I just want to be alone to try to analyze what I feel.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJfvyNbj6p1
— Thank you, I said, handing him back his jacket. And thank you for taking me home.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5h8bKebG1n
— At your service, he says, turning left while I continue straight.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4SxVUCau76
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6uw9eLRNw
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtnsaM7QlgC
The following days, nothing erases this attraction which pushes me towards Jessy. This makes me feel so guilty that I try to focus on my relationship with Chad, without really succeeding. As for Jessy, I feel like he's been running away from me since the other night. He looks away as soon as I look at him and doesn't speak to me anymore. I don't know what I did wrong for him to ignore me like that, but it pains me a lot. Perhaps he also ended up believing the nonsense that was circulated about my relationship ? If that were the case, I would be extremely hurt.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWA8zQwUpG
It was during history class that the teacher gave me the opportunity to get closer to him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEj4UvK9X3J
— I asked each of you to write a presentation on the last lesson.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhp5Y9niAs
At these words, several students point to their copy on their table.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcB7gd3LqA
— Jessy, can you pick them up ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXPvziUVuCW
This one executes. When he reaches my height, his gaze finally anchors on mine. I feel like seconds are becoming minutes. At this very moment, I realize how much I've missed Jessy these past few days. His hand brushes against mine as I hand him my paper, making me want to grab it and never let go.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrcBTfiwaFq
As if reading my thoughts, Jessy narrows his eyes slightly and purses his lips. Then he turns away towards the next table, breaking the spell that united us as the professor continues speaking : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrptUUEJXPh
— To find out what you have learned from this course, I have prepared a written quiz for you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzuqrPG1ew
Immediately, boos are heard.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42I6po8cHH
— Yes, I know, I'm not nice. While you answer the questionnaire, I will go through your presentations and form teams of two. For next week, you will have to refine your different points of view, compare them, in order to share them in front of the whole class.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGd9u8exUSx
Although I am a good student, I don't particularly enjoy being on the board in front of everyone else and am already worried about who I will have to work with. As long as it's neither with Amy nor with466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7AJ4diLbR
Pearl. I haven't spoken to them since the party at Chad's.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2NgTFkiNL
They tried to come see me on Monday but I totally ignored them. Even if I find myself alone most of the time, Chad does not share all of my classes, I prefer that to being poorly accompanied.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKqpOAjCcY
For long minutes, I put these thoughts aside to concentrate on the questioning.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbk7V6zrzS
When I finish, I raise my head and look behind me, towards Jessy who finishes a few seconds after me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKWUXvQhaU
The teacher notices us because he tells us : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjz9GHK3RwX
— Alright. Megan and Jessy, you'll be teaming up next week. You can go.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP3WBeeVv7w
At the same time, we get up and put our homework on the teacher's desk before leaving the classroom.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lhn0KRTU1
I thought we were going to be able to discuss this project but already Jessy is quickly moving away.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe763E5gn6O
— Jessy, wait ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGoGvsBHc4
He slows down, but doesn't stop.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMlCOOhAMNc
— We need to discuss how we are going to approach this presentation.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT6WQWmNdOQ
His shoulders relax and he exhales.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJVUidgzoZ
— I don't like working with others. So I suggest you do your part on your own, I will do the same and we will meet again before the next class to compare our points of view.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK89q9Rquto
— Thank you for your proposal but I refuse. There's no way I'm going to get a bad grade because you're antisocial.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fzo1rqTEE
— I'm not…466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC530aLfCIw
Before he finishes his sentence, I raise an eyebrow which interrupts him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhyBXZTYCW
— Okay, maybe I am a little, he admits with a little smile. Alright, you win Megan.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfZBqV4cPw
Feeling like I need to take advantage of my advantage before he changes his mind, I quickly scribble my address on a piece of paper and hand it to him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzaXIGhDUs
— Come to my place at the end of classes, we will be quiet to study.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc4DEldsGNB
— Thanks for the address but we could just as easily meet up after school and go to your house together.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yWjsik6L6
Why didn't I think of that ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzvCauGqCT
I refrain from slapping myself.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGZrmJvMfi
Embarrassed by my stupidity, I smile shyly. Jessy leans towards me, slips my address into his pocket and adds mischievously : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡireGdQbDnA
— I'm keeping it anyway. You never know, you might get lost along the way.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfcZhIUJbs
I don't understand why just looking at him, talking to him, puts me in this state. I feel my cheeks on fire and I am certain that when I open my mouth, nothing but nonsense comes out.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpXc8t6zeYf
But what is happening to me ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjaPNt9Fag
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ23m9uhhE4X
During the next class, I feel Chad's gaze, sitting at the desk next to mine, weighing on me suspiciously. I do my best to appear comfortable and innocent until he hands me a paper.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9RW0S1NRe
What's going on with Jessy ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3c9MXJIQzB
Astonished, I wrote : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRHHeSe2w9
What ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1oep3Xb492
Chad's response was quick : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT16gmswERx
Amy told me you two seem close and that I should be worried. It's the case ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kdDu3aprP
Anger replaces disbelief. What the hell is his problem ? Is she not tired of taking care of my life, of making up stories for me ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0EPJFQizB
No, not at all. We just have a presentation to make together. 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqTlJPLazPY
A smile lights up Chad's features. I managed to reassure him, yet I fear I may not have been completely honest with him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4gMiSrYfs
As I look at his profile, I have to recognize that my boyfriend no longer inspires in me the feelings that inspired me just a few months ago. I feel myself detaching myself from Chad, I come to wonder if I was only in love with him one day or if I have always confused love and friendship. Slipping my hands through my hair, I breathe deeply. The only thing I know for sure is that I am lost in my emotions.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEKZnmn6QUD
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWjaXC3CU8
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtW75oS8HNc
At the end of class, Jessy comes to join me, backpack on his shoulder and a book in hand.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoC44Nz56nO
— I love this book. I must have read it about ten times since last year, he tells me. I thought you might like to read it ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAC9dMjt3r
While walking the streets, I quickly skim a few pages.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEopEsE2uVB
— Do you mind if I save it to read tonight ? I'll give it back to you tomorrow.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJljYXzARH
— On the contrary. It’s so rare that I meet people who like to read something other than comics.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCUXYVszAd
— I understand you. Comics are Chad's favorite reading.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSpfalobEM
— I'm not surprised, Chad seems more of an athlete than a cerebral one.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYv09iBhjYi
I am left speechless.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazmoOLPUt0
— Are you always this frank ? Can't help but ask him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPn0kkuEp1
He shrugs his shoulders while responding : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiVHGJYApKk
— Very often. I hurt you ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡES8brSs0fq
I thought for a few seconds before answering him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92Cnmsh6s3
— No. I must admit that it is the truth.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyz5olGiibM
His smile widens, making me melt a little more.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIOFIIGm5C
Arriving home, we sit in the living room and chat about the homework we have handed in. We both think we'll get good grades. My mother comes home from work and walks into the living room, surprising us. I suddenly feel uncomfortable being with a boy other than Chad under my parents' roof. I jump up, followed by my guest.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIkvrZQQb0S
— Hey, Ch…, it’s not Chad, she smiled.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIUPJJ86gv
— Mom, this is Jessy.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ844ViwJMUb
They greet each other.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfYhiQhQPx
— We have a presentation to give to the whole class about the Second World War.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0l7mGYGwq
With a nod, Jessy confirms my words. Since my mother arrived, he hasn't said a word, and seems intimidated. This adds as evidence : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDswZa4o0Q
— Jessy, are you staying to eat with us this evening ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOUzmesOQ97
He shrugs his shoulders.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbktfdWNQ0J
— I don't want to bother you…466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1jbocU1lrP
— Don't worry, I still cook too much since Nick left for college.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoAKWFwnnw
— Nicolas is my older brother…466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHoLx5WOdyT
— It would be a pleasure to have you with us. My husband is tired of being surrounded by girls.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBL1hNmyiSF
— Okay then, Jessy said, smiling. Thanks ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoKYSiDLFzH
A little later, he met my father, then Nina. When it was time to sit down at the table, without anyone telling her, Jessy naturally took a seat next to me. I control myself so as not to let my disorder appear in front of those close to me. I feel myself vibrate every time his arm brushes mine. From time to time, Jessy looks at me sideways and gives a little amused smile, and I immediately blush ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQV8F3trO3
The meal passes in a good atmosphere until Nina, as usual, says out loud what she is thinking : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8vWPS4iLA
— You're not bad, Jessy, but I prefer Chad. It is awesome ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufVA9WGFwV
— Nina ! We don't say that kind of thing ! Reprimands my mother.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQ9HWuV1h8
— For what ? I tell the truth.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXZIpMfree
— Chad is nice, Jessy responds politely.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8wSzR4ouw5
— And he’s strong ! Nina continues, making me want to throw myself over the table and strangle her.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQoDxCWtPv
— It’s true, Chad is a great athlete, adds my father. He also taught Megan how to drive. Considering the number of guests at his party the other night, he's also very popular. He has everything going for him, this boy, says my father, whom I would like to strangle at the same time as my sister.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlpQ8FzVinf
— It’s true that he’s really lucky, Jessy whispers, looking at me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡixBZBbi1wK
I stare at him, not knowing how to react. I have a sudden and insane desire to throw myself into his arms to kiss him, this idea scares me as much as his words made me happy. Also, I'm left speechless, which makes him smile more.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxTZWt5PUgS
At the end of the meal, Jessy helps me clear the table, then asks me where the bathroom is. I tell him. My mother then approaches me and gives me a little smile.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbnsRdW8Vj
— This boy is very nice, she comments quietly so that only I can hear. And very cute at that.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJKswEq19t1
I glance at him sideways, smiling.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2nGse1G7qL
"I suppose you know what you're doing ? "466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlCSpiALLH
— Not really.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwscO6dIp1
— Meg, you’re sixteen. You didn't make a lifelong commitment to Chad. You are all young, you have the right to be carefree. I was, at your age, and I didn't know your father until much later, when I decided to settle down.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKr7U457AFL
— You know very well that I am too serious to let myself be guided by my emotions without having first thought for hours.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrh8pThA3pz
— Yes, I know, my mother sighs. And at first glance, I would say that Jessy seems to be just like you.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Zs7I8avsk
— You think that…466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFfFV9lkuZ
I want to ask her if she thinks Jessy is interested in me, but I leave it hanging when I see him coming back to us.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ42wTpG1th
— Thank you very much for inviting me to your table. It's getting late, I'm going to go home.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxaQCTUkwXg
— Wait, I'm going to walk with you for a while.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmLIedzjPE
Jessy nods before going to grab his jacket hanging on a hook in the entryway.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9uRE5AAUT5
— Thanks again ! Have a good evening everyone, he says as he leaves.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvMuFBTRs0
— Megan ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxedMQWCRv
I turn to my mother who is standing in the hallway, at the entrance to the kitchen.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvaM1G70P9
— I am sure of it ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvgODufs9V
I give him a big smile.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuBCwuVFwF
— She is sure of what ? Asks Jessy who heard everything from the porch.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4e8TClOmTb
— Oh, you're welcome, just something I asked him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxPGeJzF8Lg
Fortunately, he doesn't insist.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV3onxqnlvI
We walk down the sidewalk in silence.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡayTWsqA7ef
My neighborhood is a quiet place, where all the houses466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8O7rA4Yfw
look alike with their little white fence surrounding the garden. Only the colors of the houses vary from one to another, sometimes white with blue shutters, sometimes brown with red shutters. Our family home is cream with green shutters. My father makes a point of maintaining it well, repainting it as soon as the paint shows signs of age, and mowing the lawn regularly. This corner of the city is not known for being the richest, but at least its inhabitants ensure that nothing can damage it. I love this quiet little town which seems to live as if in a cocoon where nothing serious ever happens and where the smallest event, like the arrival of Jessy, is experienced as big news. This thought pulls me out of my reverie and, turning back to my companion, I decide to question him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6FF1R6zqY
— Did you move here alone ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDOOzEUbo4b
This seems incongruous to me since he is only seventeen, but I never see him with anyone, not even in town.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhFIf9UfBN
— No, I live with my mother.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUo4QyJxvtv
— And your father ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIilZYbNnL
— My father died when I was a kid.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiGiepIY50F
— Sorry.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhYFdxfCgSn
— It's nothing. My mother remarried and I have a little brother, Jason, who is now seven.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRkOt8anLaB
— So your father in law and your brother live with you ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSCdAey1ogA
Jessy grimace. 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRtsvWr5sj
— No, they stayed in Allentown.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBpc9LSsgw
— For what ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ASCdSuJiC
Jessy gives me a big smile while answering : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqPqPiH0So
— Joker ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUNPTsuGEx
Preferring not to insist, I move on to other questions : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQMw91rrNi
— Why did you leave Allentown ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaN7l8edrha
— Re joker ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkdwhFz4uKh
— OK. I always see you alone... but you must have friends ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQXTHUKZwuE
— You know, I just arrived and I don’t know anyone yet, except you. In Allentown, I had friends, or so I thought, but..., he interrupts himself, purses his lips, shaking his head : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUez79Lniae
— I don't want to talk about it... Let's just say, sometimes you think you know people and you're wrong.
— Like me the other night...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqjSqEcCRA
Looking serious, he nods.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHypf7unZ9
— So you’re from Allentown ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibUGGSe8zj
— Yes, I lived in a small neighborhood where everyone had known each other forever, a bit like this one. (He looks around.) Except that in town, we couldn't see the stars as well.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj3mbRyVBoR
I follow his gaze, staring at the sky illuminated by hundreds of sparkling points that no cloud hides. I feel very small and fragile in the face of this immensity. It's strange to find myself next to this boy to whom I feel close and who, at the same time, intimidates me so much.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheossc6Yax
— Your family loves Chad very much, he said suddenly, breaking this magical moment. How long have you been together ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVD8JM77tyL
I sit on the low wall bordering a house for sale.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVycvFwAYKy
— My father was a big athlete in high school and I think he recognizes himself in Chad. My mother finds him cute and nice, and my sister is in love with him, I think ! (I smile.) He and I have known each other for a very long time, since kindergarten in fact…466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbGwCtFklt
— And you’ve always loved him, Jessy adds, sitting down next to me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFAgQkDM2Tk
I blush and lower my head.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCvip9n11Mk
— It’s complicated… But let’s talk about you instead. Did you leave a girlfriend in Allentown ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkwwYvg9UR5
Jessy turns to me and raises his eyebrows, visibly surprised. I stare at him, both impatient and dreading his answer.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMnPLy7k5Ui
— Your question is strange...
— Why ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2weryvHpn
— Because you're dating the perfect guy according to everyone around you, so I wonder what your questioning is hiding.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUj2lirsgt
— It wasn’t you who told me that you shouldn’t necessarily listen to what others say ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAllYBHHMLt
— Touché, he smiled. Let's say I had a girlfriend.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiIBSFeUcz8
— You still have ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1qGdJYh09
— Well no, we split up...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVq9vn7jgsz
I don't give him time to finish his sentence as my lips are already on his. Immediately, he kisses me back.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtpMB9mzgfb
His lips are soft and warm on mine, I feel him slide a hand to my waist, pulling me closer to him until, as suddenly as it began, he pushes me back forcefully before standing up abruptly. jump, visibly annoyed.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6piPxsXOpT
— That’s not true ! Why did you do it ? He writes to himself while standing in front of me, hands on hips waiting for a response.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEj6d2dk15
— I don’t know, I said as sincerely as possible. Since I met you, I have felt lost. I don't know why but I feel like I've known you forever and this feeling totally upsets me. I was hoping you felt the same way I did.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2vWWgoOWR
Far from calming down, Jessy walks away from me, walking as quickly as he can. I get up and run after him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NRu3kvOXW
— Jessy, wait ! What is happening ? Please don't tell me that kiss was that bad ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfCBaKA0DfJ
He doesn't stop though. I grab him by one arm, forcing him to stop his way.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BjoImFZBT
He glares at me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjKKQErlFHF
— I'm sorry if... I shouldn't have kissed you, but I honestly thought you wanted to too.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOde2SJnOtS
— It is, he whispers, staring at me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPbnnOGAAN
— So where is the problem ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFQdv934bU
— I can not do that.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdcWopupjFw
— But why ? I know that compared to Chad it's a bad thing but...466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5D0Hne76s7
— It has nothing to do with him. The problem is me. I'm not made for love, he gets angry again. I gave too much, now that is forbidden to me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0TPwTG2Up
He frees himself from my hand before continuing on his way. Staying there, I say to him : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡug0lBJmkMO
— I don't understand ! You can't pretend to want to kiss me and then run away like that a second later. It's not me who made you suffer so why should I pay for what others made you endure ? I'm not your ex ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsBKgrPvOAS
Abruptly, he stops his running, turns around before coming back towards me. His features are distorted by anger but I also read a form of pain there.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMp7acLqzl
— No, you are not the one who changed my life and I in no way wish to become the one who changes yours in the same way ! My life is ruined Meg, I'm already at the end. I'm going to die, he adds when he sees that I don't understand his words.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuj9aHR846
— Wh... What ? I stammer, in shock.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZ7rm945Ut
He gets closer. His face is only a few centimeters from mine.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡakfdmor7ns
— Meg, I'm HIV positive. I have the AIDS virus, he admits quietly so that no one else can hear him, although the street is deserted. So stay away from me, believe me it's better ! 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX2xslquyP7
He leaves as quickly as possible. Soon night envelops it completely. For a long moment, I stay there, dismayed, unable to make the slightest gesture, no longer knowing what to think. His words seem to spin in my head like a wild merry go round that no one can stop. I don't know how long I stand on that sidewalk looking in his direction long after he's gone.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmidHakPBOC
466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8sNDnmaPl6
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When I get home, I try not to let anything show and lock myself in the kitchen. I thought I would be safe, but as soon as I closed the door, my mother opened it and stuck her head in.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zx4Qy91C4
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're very pale, aren't you sick ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5cBen6ujP
— Everything is fine. I miss Nicolas, I would like to talk to him.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztojcoR17I
Understanding the message, my mother nods and closes the door behind her. Immediately, I grab the phone and dial my brother’s number. Luckily he answers after two rings.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXYdeUFnnQ
— Hello ? he says, happily.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4BDOAkmDL
— Nick, it’s me.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQXFA2klHY
I'm having a hard time keeping the tremors in my voice at bay.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmdn6GTtsk7
— Meg, what’s going on ? He worries.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRWmv6ATDp
The day I met Jessy, I told my brother that same evening. He seemed happy that a boy other than Chad was messing with me. For some reason, Nick always grimaced at my relationship with Chad. 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiIYDuKtfOZ
— Jessy came to the house for dinner this evening... 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsq9fJd7VV2
— Oh, he sighs, he threw you away.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUNrK0m3SD
I think about the way I kissed him and feel myself blushing again. If I had known how he was going to push me away, I would never have let myself be carried away by my desire.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaG5UFfUd3l
— Yes, but that’s not the worst, I sob. Jessy admitted to me that she was sick.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJkdRi89hR
Realizing the horror of the situation, I fall to the ground. I am not afraid of AIDS, I know that I risk nothing. But I am terrified for Jessy, for his future which is likely to be short. My brother doesn't speak, he gives me time to calm down. When my sobs dry up, I continue : 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1TSvM5yyDG
— Jessy is HIV positive, I blurt out in one breath.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIkDGk2FmaK
A gasp of surprise escapes my brother.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUXEkIkz7n4
— Okay, he breathes, making me understand that he’s thinking about the situation. What are you going to do ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pQ7FQq4WQ
— I don't know. Nick, I need to know your opinion.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnYpnxstBy3
— I admit that I didn't expect that at all. Do you see yourself turning your back on him ? 466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JynoSWyBx
— I wouldn't be able to.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYj4LaIjFxC
— Meg, I know this probably isn't the kind of relationship you imagined, but based on what you've told me so far about this guy, I think right now he especially needs support and friendship. Don’t reject him because he doesn’t match your ideal.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJF9oomZyx
— Exactly, he corresponds to my ideal and the fact that he is ill changes nothing. If I am devastated it is because AIDS is an incurable disease. I don't want him to die, Nick, I'm crying again.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMpfFPLkxP
I am aware that I have only known him for a short time but, without being able to explain it, he has already marked my existence.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8Wwcuiw8I
— Come on, little sister, don’t cry. For now, Jessy is alive and, even if he keeps you at a distance, I'm sure he would be happy to have you in his life. Try to make him smile while he's here. He must need to think about something other than this crap.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBo46S2EIk
— You're right. Nick, what I confided to you must absolutely remain between us. No one should know.466Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqln9fg9fZ
— Finally you know me ! Come on now tell me how he dumped you ! He laughs as I bite my lip in shame.
