440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhKXLiwiaN0
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rWwU4cDeV
The next day, Jessy doesn't show up to school all day, nor the next day. I'm worried to death for him. Also at the end of class, I will question Amy in order to obtain his address. She gives a little smile which immediately makes me think that she is going to rush to find Chad and tell him but, honestly, I don't care. At this moment, I don't care about my reputation, all that matters is this boy who has already indelibly marked my life and for whom I worry so much. I have to struggle for a little while and make up a crazy story, but in the end, I leave the school with the coordinates in my pocket. Immediately, I went to his house. He lives in an old two story house which has retained its incredible charm, despite the renovation work it has undergone. The paint, a light yellow, was redone recently. It’s just the kind of well kept house my dad likes. This thought makes me smile. A covered terrace, where a bench and two armchairs have been installed, shelters the entrance to the house. I climb the three steps and ring the bell. I don't have to wait long before the door opens for Jessy.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9LmXO8pO6
— I’m not in the mood to worry, he told me point blank.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KJtNexcHO
He looks tired, preoccupied. Despite his obvious bad mood, I'm happy to see him. These last two days without seeing him seemed like an eternity. His mother comes up behind him. I can only glimpse it briefly.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡundFYwhj8z
— It’s for me, mom, he tells her.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfSuYZ5zR0
Understanding that he doesn't want to talk to me in front of her, I decide to play on it and, leaning towards him, I whisper to him : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNI0dCLHZId
— I'll stay until we've talked, and it's too bad if your mother asks me what I want.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhF3xmwD0j
His green eyes stare at me, trying to see if I'm bluffing or not, finally, he gives in.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCU8pC30zWL
— Very well, I’m coming.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZAZtGyWr3
He grabs a denim jacket before following me down the street.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkeM2UdCOd
We walk aimlessly, following the roads that pass before us in complete silence. I don't know how to start the discussion, I'm afraid of offending him, or of upsetting him if I question him too much.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxN1mZW4GPF
— So ? You wanted to talk to me, go ahead ! He says in a bad mood, as we arrive near an abandoned factory.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaThRML0ym
Intimidated, as always by his presence at my side, I take it upon myself to get started : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRi7RYYkE3
— You haven't come to school for the last two days...440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBno8MJ09EH
— Oh yes, you noticed, well done ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMnBchKOszZ
— Don’t be sarcastic, please. But you let me down for the presentation ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgvz6ekkuif
— Oh, and you probably want an apology ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6FMoxeQOhn
— No, I don't care about this duty.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡggF6MkfEyj
I use a calm tone so as not to annoy him further.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrElV9LrHb
— Why did you come to see me ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ59KxQiRZoR
He stops walking.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtOFJ7n7dIq
— I was worried about you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9rfp78aLx
— Well then ! Instead, admit that you want details so you can tell your friends everything afterwards ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8UfiNqgLq
— I don't plan to tell anyone about it.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYq2Idg9xn
He examines me for a long moment, seeming to search deep in my eyes if he can trust me.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKOivfM1qB
— How long have you been HIV positive ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGyaGdBIS2e
— It's been about a year now.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmbb2fLT3V
— And how did you catch it ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvC6jJChJA0
— One evening at a friend’s party, I met a girl…440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjoO5RFEkbn
— And you slept together ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAG6eIHBsHA
— No, we watched cartoons ! He said, really angry.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03B0j1oTxx
— She didn’t tell you she was HIV positive ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbi3DqZ0Wlk
— She didn't know at the time... A doctor called my mother a few weeks later, Haley had taken a test which came back positive. She had informed the doctor that I was one of her partners. I had to go get tested myself and that’s how I learned that she infected me.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySwfoDzVl2
— Just for one night you spent together.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpkmyQJXMOw
I whisper this sentence as if to myself.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51IBnZ1Xsy
— Not one night, just a short moment and a lack of condom and this is the result. A word of advice Meg : When you decide to do it with Chad, don't forget the condom otherwise you'll end up like me, a walking corpse ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cBQIBuvT0
— Jessy, stop saying that ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5hRUffyxkb
— For what ? It's the truth ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZiPfdeOWCU
— No, you are in good health, it doesn't even look like you have this virus so you have to be optimistic.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksSycttinD
— As if that could cure me ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftI0xi3KHT
— Yes, it can help you hold on until the doctors find a cure.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnq5o8reYt
I spoke more firmly than I wanted. Jessy looks at me, surprised.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhO5icXh3Pe
— You're right, you have to be positive and enjoy life, right ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3sPxgln5K
Suddenly his gaze changes, it becomes darker. He approaches me and takes me by the waist, holding me tightly against his body. I pull away from him immediately, not out of fear of illness, but as I would with any boy who did it this way.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhcANfvT7Eh
— Hey, weird ! You don't want to kiss me anymore ! This surprises me greatly ! Go find your fantastic and healthy boyfriend and leave me alone ! he shouts as he walks away.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvdwtwEXmYJ
— Jessy, you’re wrong, that’s not it ! Come back ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhEgVJaNwKv
My words are lost in the silence.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAilkdDVYss
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The next morning before classes, which start later today, and where Jessy will certainly still be conspicuous by his absence, I am sitting in a corner of the snack bar. It’s a café where all the young people from high school like to meet for a drink, listen to music and chat. The room is quite large, with its light green imitation leather benches, its silver metal tables and its fifties decoration all in pink and blue. I found Chad there, who is having fun around a pinball machine with his friends a little further away, while I read Jessy's book. In fact, this is the third time I've devoured it since he lent it to me. The story of this man who fights alone against everyone to obtain his freedom after having been condemned in advance by public opinion now takes on a whole new meaning for me. Between these lines, it is Jessy’s life that I see. I can't stop thinking about him, and it drives me crazy. I'm dating Chad, I like Chad. So why do I only think about Jessy's lips on mine ? Why am I so worried about him ? How come I miss him so much ? I have already gone several days without seeing Chad, when he went on vacation with his parents, without ever feeling this emptiness in the pit of my heart. Yet I am in love with him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiBYz9A64P7
Do I like Chad ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMSjgzyWMy
Ah, I'm going to go crazy if this continues ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUMwAoHvmx
I raise my head and look at him, he looks at me and gives me a smile that I have trouble responding to, before he turns his attention back to his friends.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxEuDTFUP80
Why don't I feel anything when I look at it ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr7wNOcNt3R
Putting my thoughts aside, I carefully dive back into my reading when Amy approaches me. That day, more than ever, I had no desire to talk to him. As I expected, she reported my comments to Chad and, as always, I had to justify myself. Luckily we have this talk to give, it gave me the perfect excuse.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1aTaNLcEoE
Amy lifts the cover of my book and whispers : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo7Ic4BWjpC
— Put down that book ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaI2HXrfBPd
— It’s a great book ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36uxStZIGW
— I will never understand how you could want to read outside of class, there are so many things440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBB65ziFsMc
much more exciting to do…440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUXRExrtB97
— Excuse me…440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yzDkqIuxn
I get up quickly after seeing Jessy passing in the street.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFgrktaSHW
Hurriedly, I leave the café.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUaBoFPZ6b
— Jessy ! Wait for me ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZl1PYVnOy
As usual, he hears me, but continues on his way.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz10QQA1aF3
— I have your book ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7t2AwA6UM
This time, I manage to catch his attention, he stops on the sidewalk.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSw9EhH9bD
— What do you want from me ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEzDu59lQh
— I just wanted to give that back to you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNICuTRL0I
I hand him his paperback, staring at him, my heart rate increasing.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RL3AkeLhG
— And then, I wanted us to talk.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxoiWpUzZi
— I think we said everything. You should go back to your boyfriend.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6aJIgbm3OT
— I don’t want to talk with Chad, but with you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwycKTls0ov
— Thank you, that’s a pleasure, says a familiar voice behind me, making me jump.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfIYKalurs
I quickly turn around to see my boyfriend.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡceFxleqU5l
— It's not what you think. But I need to talk to Jessy.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBZcJipJcv
— We have nothing to say to each other, he repeats.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINw5v0T77n
— Glad to hear you say that ! Stop hovering over my girlfriend ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKCJJthJ49
— Hey, I’m here, Chad ! You don't have to speak on my behalf and even less tell me who I can talk to or not ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjboiQ8T7W
— There, I agree with you, replies Jessy.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYLX58VXdX
— We didn't ask you anything ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKghB1VStYE
— Leave him alone ! It’s me who wants to talk to him ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbbOdLIXnbu
— Are we having a threesome now ? Chad angrily grabs my arm.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9FZ8qxNAN
He squeezes it tightly and takes me with him towards the snack bar.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HEMkU6sKB
— Let me go, I demand, trying to get out of his grip. You're ridiculous ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJOHu7ebuK
Chad tightens his grip further.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUSTU8v93v
— I just want to talk to you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRCRO3hNWrP
— So let go of me, you’re hurting me ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2IHFvtlxe
— Let her go ! Jessy demands, interposing.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8lmV2S7V1x
— Don't get involved ! My boyfriend shouts, finally releasing my sore arm before pushing Jessy along the wall of the establishment.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3wBPAKGwx
— Don’t hit me, Jessy warned.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhG8SjwhNTa
— Ah, Monsieur gives more orders, says Chad angrily, putting his fist in the young man's stomach.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡipzXispAjg
In shock, Jessy doubles over, dropping his book.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7m8TcodA60
— Chad, stop ! I scream in the middle of the street.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdTco2Gkte
Jessy, still hunched over, rushes at Chad and knocks him to the ground. He finds himself straddling him, trying to keep him on the ground while asking him to calm down. But you don't know Chad very well to think that he's going to let himself be controlled so easily. Soon they are rolling on the sidewalk, almost falling onto the road. Chad finds himself on top of Jessy and punches him in the stomach again. Then he stands up, waiting for Jessy to get up. When he gets back to his feet, he spreads his hands in a sign of appeasement, but Chad rushes at him again and hits him in the cheek.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJdfPdmUdv
— Chad ! Leave him ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡayw3qpPjzV
Jessy picks up his book and walks away, but Chad comes at him again and hits him in the back. Jessy falls to his knees as Chad walks around to face him and grabs him by the collar of his T-shirt.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeztvxrJhW
No matter how much I beg him, Chad doesn't listen to me. I am about to betray my promise when, fortunately, two police officers intervene to separate them, surrounding them.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06QtipHym2
Jessy immediately regains his calm while Chad continues to struggle in order to continue the fight.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmAMpBWlUro
— What is happening here ? Asks the officer holding Jessy.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GYq0t54nT
— This guy is hitting on my girlfriend, Chad shouts, still annoyed.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpHLGbu4yo
— Anything ! I shout angrily. Jessy is a friend and there’s no way you’re going to forbid me from talking to him ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrP3CNVurw
My boyfriend stares at me in astonishment while I think I see recognition in Jessy's eyes. This has the gift of calming Chad who lets his arms fall while blowing.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1UM7uq0N6W
— Can we let go of you ? Asks the second police officer.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJ6SR3WF75
Both boys nodded weakly.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLvZd2rZO5b
— It’s not over yet, Chad says, staring at Jessy, before heading back to the snack bar.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDchfPjlROO
— It'll be OK ? Asks the other agent. He hurt you, do you want to go to the hospital ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1rXJdaLT6
Jessy's complexion suddenly turned pale.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOPp8mv0zx
— No, it’s okay.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lbMqwUZj0
— I’ll take care of him, I intervene, moving closer to him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxqhMVC2NDJ
With a knowing look, the two police officers walk away.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJfHfILTCm
— Thank you, Jessy sighs.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6vuepTRMa
— You seemed panicked at the idea of going to the hospital.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzlDQa5MOb6
— Yeah, I'm not a big fan of it. I've already just left my doctor's office, I'm not going to spend the rest of my day on a stretcher.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aRxSBA2S7
I pick up his book and give it back to him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpL5s1hLF3
— Do you want to talk now ? I ask.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7w3ZVVOXTY
Jessy purses his lips.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiS1HHPusW6
— You never give up ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZkpsV6dTi
— It depends on the subject but when it’s something important to me, no, I never give up.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18exb3FkZX
Jessy seems touched by my words, he lowers his head and nods, pursing his lips.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFLsWBe09nN
Without even asking him if he plans to go to class this morning, we head towards his house.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHS91QNs8Uu
— Did you like the book ? He finally asked after a long silence.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnFSWbLLlO
— I devoured it ! I'll have to buy a copy.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSPvtvgs8rC
His smile is radiant when he tells me : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOkGlLXPfW
— I'm glad you liked it. You're the first person I've told about this.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhdMZa6Z9ZH
I take advantage of this confidence to try to learn more.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqhJizUrwo
— You told me you went to the doctor, are you okay ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2VwaA8mst
— My doctor told me that apart from being HIV positive, I am in great shape. She will do regular blood tests to monitor how the virus is progressing and has also encouraged me to join a support group of people who have the same problem as me, he tells me as he stops walking.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKfBuxClQt
I meditate on his words for a few seconds, I know how important the subject is and I definitely don't want to focus on it.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjIeKONKhHy
— I think you should try going to one of these meetings. After all, what are you risking ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8SkrdHTqkp
He raises his face to the sky and observes a cloud which moves slowly, pushed by a light wind.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5L2JyPfSNB
— Maybe you're right.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOLMRnUc1f
Satisfied with his answer, I leave him in front of his house. As I head back home, I'm torn between the pleasure of being closer to Jessy and the anger that overcomes me when I think of Chad. I know this situation has gone on for too long.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zd3aBQYrk
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ8Bj1NgXaj
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I had barely crossed the threshold of my house when my mother told me that Chad was waiting for me in the garden.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeFQH62GMKi
— Neither of you have been to class and Chad looks upset, she said. What's going on, Megan ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡap9ix9gUBz
— I'm sorry, mom. I should have warned you. Chad and Jessy fought before we went to high school. Chad crossed the line, Jessy is hurt, and believe me, he really didn't need this.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIpnVrTA8g4
My mother examines me carefully. I'm not going to lie, along the way I thought about how events unfolded and the more I think about it, the more my anger grows.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlAbfASlh4
— And this fight happened because of how you feel about Jessy ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXr8ggmtSv
I agree, nodding my head.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NYbl2vfVr
— Now, do you know what you are doing ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡotbQ03Scsp
— Yes, even if it is painful, I can no longer hide my face.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2clyxVSWtM
My mother gives a little knowing smile.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5c44mLP3I
— GOOD. I don't like it when you skip school, but this time, I'm giving up. You will go to class this afternoon. In the meantime, go and sort this situation out. Good luck.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCNOkGnyGsc
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL4riwuG4ZJ
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Chad is pacing around the yard when I open the back door of the house to join him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn77lMdQh8F
— Finally you're here ! Were you with him ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWPZadwxnGt
The tone of his voice is icy. If he thinks I'm going to let him talk to me like that, he's sorely mistaken.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSxJBv3h0Y
— Remind me, when did we get married ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNXrFwOXgj
— Pardon ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmFfP41LSLt
— No, because the reason you're acting like an incredible asshole is because we've been married for years and you think I'm your property, right ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcip0J45Vt1
Chad puts his hand to his forehead and bursts out into mirthless laughter.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZcQz7XPWo
— I should have known you were going to take his side. Damn, Meg, you don't realize this guy is manipulating you to separate us ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsB9CLBiLD
If until now I had managed to keep calm, his words made me lose all control.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDPj9btvCzH
— But you are completely delusional ! I'm not your thing, I'm free to do what I want ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuJ77Fgj7l
— Like sleeping with him ! ? He writes to himself, clenching his fists.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEt8rETNV3v
— I'm not going out with him ! I scream. And I'm not going out with you anymore ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlb6FNKoERM
In shock, he takes two steps back.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIaFZ4HsC6Q
— What ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLN9MrHSPLd
— You understood me very well. It's over Chad.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOnzBUO4ZyF
— He succeeded then ? He wanted to separate us and you become his accomplice.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScoZEsa6N8
This time it’s me who’s in shock. Where did he get such an idea ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfN1m7TMyEK
— No, but do you hear yourself ? I'm talking to you about us, not Jessy. He never even suggested that I break up with you, even after you hit him earlier.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDuU3lZTCG
— You're not going to make me believe that it's enough for you to realize that you don't love me anymore.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡozYLev4w6U
— Since we have been together, I have asked myself a lot of questions, I admit, going to sit down on a chair in the garden furniture. We have nothing in common. I know that I annoy you when I talk to you about literature and you annoy me when I try to share a moment with you and you are so captivated by a match on TV that you don't care.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmAecH9mw6v
Chad opens his mouth to respond but remains silent.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSsMAFeDT47
— You know I’m right, I insist calmly. You and I have known each other since we were kids, we have always been friends and I think we should have stayed that way.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWz6h0JSpeO
He takes a deep breath as his eyes water.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7xTHxXT1g
— So you don’t love me anymore ? he whispers.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcl2Krhhjk
— Yes I love you but, contrary to what I thought, I realized that I am not in love with you. I love you as a friend, not as the man of my life.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bFeN8flWt
— And did you realize how you felt, before or after falling in love with Jessy ? He get angry again. It’s not over Meg ! I'm sure this guy is hiding something and trust me I'll find out what it is ! You will come back to me Meg ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHn7NgycKRY
— Chad ! Chad ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBrZhSkZd3
But it's too late, he's already slammed the door behind him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOIuyoxHWA
I feel relieved to finally have been able to put into words what had bothered me since the beginning of our story, but I am also worried at the thought of Chad discovering Jessy's secret. I hope his threats are out of anger and that after he calms down he will realize their stupidity.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlT9dFk1iMf
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmV68PwKjh
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HbiX2LVFW
In the afternoon, I head back to school and smile as soon as I see Jessy arriving in the main hallway.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54B5n20ymH
— You’ve decided to come back, I comment.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcP97UPlviL
— Yeah, I don’t want Chad to think he’s got the upper hand on me, he replies as we walk down the hall towards our class.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfr19ttAF9
— Good choice. But I need to talk to you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIwFrgdwgvZ
Without waiting, I pull him by his jacket away from the crowd of students and lead him into a corner near the boys' bathroom. I don't want anyone to hear our exchange.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbcif66fibQ
— What is happening ? He asks me, frowning.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqK7bhrAZvF
— Chad was at my house when I got home.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQCJ92CeJ9
— Okay, he says slowly.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcP63Vo93IN
— I broke up with him, I admit abruptly.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfcflnh4Hd
His already piercing gaze locks on mine and never lets go. I wish I could drown in it but I only have a short time before the bell rings.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6pzTWLgGZu
— He is very angry with you. He thinks you made me dump him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIOPIUBA15
— I have never done that ! He writes to himself, shocked.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaWWcz1OXjE
— I know that perfectly, but I think he's looking for someone to blame for our breakup, when there's no one to blame. We're not meant for each other, that's all. Anyway, he told me you're hiding something and he's going to find out what it is. So be careful, okay ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAWHwbvmkf
— Yeah.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQzFWzoAIN
He leans against the wall behind him and whispers, with tears in his eyes : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYrC5iWFzM
— I don't want it to start again like in my old school, I couldn't stand it.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrzU1sI80p
Seeing him abandon his armor in favor of sincerity upsets me beyond words. In these moments of fragility, I meet the real Jessy, not the one who takes a cold attitude to send me away but the sensitive boy who has suffered too much.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrOARbDeop
— That won’t happen, I reassure him. You are not alone here, I am your friend, I will always be here no matter what happens.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9SlN0YNLr
— Thanks Meg. I thought about what you told me earlier, about the support group for HIV— positive people. I called my doctor to ask for the contact details of the center.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHT0ZfoPtH
— Great, I smile. It will help you to talk with people who have the same virus as you, you will certainly be able to help each other.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyb1gapX2D0
— I don’t really believe it, but I’m going to try to go to a meeting, he said, resuming a distant attitude. So maybe you'll let go of me a little ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrraIQ5ym9
The bell which announces the resumption of classes interrupts our discussion.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3f5xn5RDaL
— Here, I said, handing him my notes. That way you'll be up to date on math.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXEk1qMzZV5
— Thanks Megan. Sometimes it’s good to have you in my life ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdiSMNnEqsJ
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOC6SReamf
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The last bell announcing the end of the day has barely sounded before a rumor invades the establishment. I'm putting my things in my locker when I hear whispers about Jessy. I turn to him who is standing a little further away in front of his locker. He lowers his head, shoulders hunched and lips pursed.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcI0DTHnMv
Around us, the students murmur among themselves, stunned. At the time, AIDS was still a little— known disease; we were only in the early stages of medical research. There are lots of rumors about how and why this disease spreads, but the truth is that people still know very little about it. The only things we know for sure are that AIDS is scary and deadly. All eyes are fixed on Jessy, those who pass behind him move aside to make sure not to touch him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR7ESFAkNL9
A student I vaguely know passes in front of me, I intercept him to ask him what this new rumor is.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN8tlmFwjaH
— You are not aware ? Jessy Sutter, the new student, he has AIDS and what's more, he's homosexual ! He announces to me proudly. Above all, don't go near him, you never know.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNv7dYa6ld
I don't have time to send him away, he's already moved away.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ607kCwPj1f
I look at Jessy again. He raises his head, fixes me with a burning look of anger before leaving the school as quickly as possible.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJGaPRUQO7
I do not understand anything. How can everyone know ? One thing is certain, given Jessy's fury, he thinks I betrayed him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtOVDgO7WH
I rush after him but when I get outside, he has already disappeared.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCvejHSWb1
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGVIsMHKVox
440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvPWKRpptJ
After looking for Jessy all over town for what seemed like hours, imagining him alone, depressed, I gathered up my courage and went to his house. The door opens to reveal his mother.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpekgyYCPZN
— Hello, she greets me kindly.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7mjGxGr7Te
From the first glance, I feel that she is an understanding woman. Her long blond hair and green eyes identical to those of her son reflect the gentleness that I also detect in Jessy.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehpCNUC8Ob
— Good morning. Is Jessy there ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBmJDmXmXeo
— No. You're Megan, right ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhdkEDmiGWE
I nod in agreement.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡacNm9yvapb
— Jessy told me about you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv38Yb05C2i
— I've been looking for him everywhere since school ended, hasn't he come back ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRal1XtuKD
— No, I have not seen it. He must be walking somewhere now that everyone knows Jessy is infected.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb5lAXLg8FF
I look at her, surprised that she was able to guess, she continues : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX97Drp6sVI
— I received a call from the school. Apparently, parents of students learned of the rumor and immediately reported it to the school administration. I am called this evening to talk about my son's state of health and to see if he can continue his education in this establishment.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcAwBY5TY2w
— My God, this is nonsense ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgzU3SYEf6
— Unfortunately that's what happens when people know Jessy has AIDS. Everywhere he goes, he is rejected. This has happened before in Allentown, and it's happening again here. Everyone is afraid of being contaminated by simple contact, even my husband can't stand living under the same roof as him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQe7f1qd1F
Mrs. Sutter shakes her head as if her thoughts could evaporate with that gesture.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lfgec6SaK
— It is so unfair. I need to talk to him. Contrary to what he thinks, I did not betray him. I don't know how his secret was revealed. You don't know where he might be ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPjOM1vrsF
— He sometimes leaves alone for hours.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ64MXRWFv9U
— You are never afraid that he…440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUAYxMkZ69G
Mrs. Sutter looks at me as if to say, “Would that be worse than what awaits him ?”440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZL1yduA5c
I thank her and go home, totally dejected. Not only do all students now have to know about Jessy's condition, but even the administration is threatening not to keep him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1HFNYaJrUy
When I walk through the door of my house, night begins to fall. I hear my parents talking.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGXTj4kHBqf
— Meg, it’s you ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZPi4OZGVv5
— Yes Dad.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlspCbuYPnc
— Can you come ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQCXcvrQVI
I walk down the hallway and into the kitchen, where my parents are sitting around the table.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzFzRMOBI5
— Nina told us what is being said around town about Jessy. Is it true ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRHwM2LUpX
I nod silently.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ygskD73NN
— How long have you known that ? Ask my mother.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeFfwH4cHDd
— Since the other evening, when he stayed to eat. He admitted it to me when I took him home.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT51qnoC9Cw
— You could have told us about it ! My father points out.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaGAj8hhPTa
— I told him I wouldn't tell anyone. I didn't want to break my word...440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡefUXcGB4mK
— Then how…440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofbBw14kiq
— You can believe me mom, I keep asking myself that question. I only see one answer : Chad. This afternoon, he was very upset with Jessy and promised to find his secret. However, I don't know how he found out about it.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7NdA1ZqyaU
— Is it true that Chad fought with Jessy because you wanted to talk to him ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡujutLy9umz
I nod.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ScdQRd6Dy
— Chad wanted to force me into the snack bar, Jessy intervened to defend me.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgtdO2tpCEf
My response makes my father clench his fists and he says : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAGvbwc1dy
— He loses nothing by knowing what I think of his way of fighting like that and the rest.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqNx86vNZm
— Are you aware that Mrs. Sutter has been summoned to high school ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx4HBRqrG8Z
In front of my parents' questioning looks, I tell them the words of Jessy's mother.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcwoZG4WdV
My mother makes a few phone calls and tells us : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GYnJKXCY3
— The parents’ council is meeting this evening with the administration. Officially, they can't fire Jessy because he's sick, but they can send a report to the academy who will judge what to do in such a circumstance.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BGI7xJwkw
Seeing my dismayed face, my father said to me : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfVsuwUDLFc
— Don’t worry, darling. We will go to this meeting and we will support Ms. Sutter. It will be fine.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgFBkCSnSOs
Less convinced than my father, I go into the garden and sit on the swing. Alone with my thoughts, I realize that I have suddenly aged. Before I met Jessy, I was a carefree kid with few worries, but now I see life differently. And to think that it’s only been ten days since Chad’s party. I wanted to become an adult, I'm served ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOq9kMp5W3R
Jessie, where are you ? I sigh, mulling over the latest events. I don't hear Nina open the back door.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFZiqUeGS57
— I was wondering where you were, she says, making me jump. The parents are out, Chad is there. He wants to see you.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGdyIqjolu
I sigh again. After what happened this afternoon, I still don't want to talk to him. But he doesn't wait to hear my opinion before following my sister who, feeling the storm brewing in the sky as much as with my ex-boyfriend, slips away.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfu21cU1jCo
— I came to apologize for my behavior this morning. If I had known Jessy was gay, I wouldn't have been jealous of you talking to him.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmH6N2Q914
I huff, exasperated. Chad looks at me, I see the incomprehension on his face.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaIorcEXKAc
— He is not homosexual. It was a girl who infected him ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKjLb2przcj
— Sorry, but how could I have known ? You don't tell me anything anymore ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZgqCCJTrY
— Sorry, but when someone tells me a secret, I do my best to keep it. Were you the one who revealed Jessy's illness to everyone ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5HGTPhYqH
His false innocent appearance betrays him even before he confesses. I think I see a little boy having done something stupid with his hands in his pants pockets, squirming for words. Even when we were children, he behaved this way. His attitude makes my anger explode.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡInqzdAv0wH
— It's about time you grew up, Chad ! You are so immature at times ! Do you realize that now everyone knows about their state of health ? That he might be kicked out of school ? That you're ruining his life ? But no, you don’t care as long as you make him pay for my breakup ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRoNCocxNRK
Annoyed, he lowers his head. This attitude annoys me even more.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QY6oUDmK8
— I know, I screwed up. But if you had told me everything...440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTjnmljACF
I give him a murderous look. He's old enough to know how to behave.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERHtIdOMjM
— Don’t ever ask me why I broke up with you again ! If you want to have an answer, look at yourself in the mirror... That is, if you can ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wtnYVa79V
— You don't even realize that since he arrived in town, you have completely ignored me ! Chad gets angry in turn.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡproOFcvh0G
— It’s nothing to do with it ! I'm the guilty one, the one who understood that we are too different. Jessy had nothing to do with our relationship ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6SDNnJttOc
— I know, he whispers. I heard him say it this afternoon.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZufKUv1qM
My eyes must be as round as saucers because Chad continues : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXMzcdkygs
— I was behind the bathroom door when you were talking. I heard your conversation, that’s how I knew.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8JBVHCSXh
— Oh my God ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYFJ1Q1FuR
With tears in my eyes, I place my hands over my mouth.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CzbrQTZ2u
— I’m sorry Meg. I didn't want things to go this far.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOND7GQ37o
— And you rushed to repeat it to the whole school ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQVeCyGnwE
— I only told a few friends but it spread quickly. I really blame myself.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZ0OVF3hb6
My eyes filled with tears, I whisper : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72XA1Wmosp
— You can.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuPwhVFNyP
— You’ll never want me again after this, will you ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgT2H60Apzo
I shake my head.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAgFbJO00g
— You disappointed me a lot, Chad. You are still my friend but I no longer trust you. I'm sorry.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObouazzkfk
— You don’t have to be, it’s my fault. I went way too far. The role of the jealous boyfriend doesn't work for me, he smiles sadly. Do you want us to remain friends ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNx9WZKipoF
I nod in agreement. I know that after digesting these events, I will forgive him. I can't not have him in my life, he's been part of it for too long.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BvoUzvuK7
Chad is about to enter the house again when, turning around, he says to me : 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtUcxSEeVl
— By the way, if you're looking for Jessy, it seems he hangs out near the bridge over the highway.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJqOIpSQoW
As soon as Chad leaves, I put on my black parka and head in the direction he told me. Night has now fallen, the air is heavy, the storm threatens to break out at any moment. I hurry the three kilometers, running half the way. I arrive on the bridge, out of breath, but happy to see Jessy there. It is a narrow bridge, reserved for pedestrians, it allows us to reach a corner of the forest which encircles the city. Jessy paces along the steel guardrail, watching the cars and trucks speeding by on the dual carriageway just below. His face is half lit by the streetlights placed all along the highway. He turns to me as I approach.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5AxYtXwAca
— What are you doing here ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSTgGbb7Is
His tone is dry.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQCJ08OmkD
— I've been looking for you for hours.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSCtm5MFGmo
— Well, you found me. You see, I'm still alive, you can go back now.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3s23Xlchi2
— I'm sorry for what happened. I discussed it with Chad, he was the one who spread the rumor.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6R3II2FcBk
— So you came so that I could forgive him ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk8pmNRV8hE
I look at him, incredulous; However, I have to admit that he is not entirely wrong. I wish we could all be friends, but I know that is a utopian vision of our friendship. However, even if she is often embarrassing for his interlocutors, I like Jessy's frankness.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2jRAwBFep
— I came because I'm afraid for you. It's late, come home with me.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzuyHvGUTl
Jessy looks at me with a disillusioned look but doesn't answer. He starts walking along the railing again, moving away from me. He seems hypnotized by the vehicles passing beneath our feet.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMwrWN5ETDL
— Ever since I’ve known you, you’ve spent your time moving away. Why are you running away from everyone ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBZQ2SbEYK
I shout to cover the sound of a heavy truck passing below.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqv9tH1oVN
Suddenly a lightning bolt tears through the sky. Jessy turns around angrily.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSkd8MJWTT
— I'm not running away from anyone ! It's the others who never want me ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpowEXlebX
He sits on the railing which is only a few centimeters wide, passes his legs over the air, wraps them around the metal bars. A new flash of lightning illuminates the sky. Despite the heaviness of the night, I tremble and move closer to him to hold him by the back of his jacket.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5nn5drmfHX
— Jessy, please. Come back ! You're scaring me ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKLhVsx5bJ
— I'm a danger to others, Meg ! I'm just on reprieve from this crap ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRI8o3TgdV
The tone of his voice is no longer charged with anger, but full of despair. It squeezes my heart.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1voKwPurW
— No ! You are not a risk to anyone ! And you are still here, alive and well ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN2MNFJYJ0T
Thunder suddenly cracks, startling me. I move closer to him and tighten my grip.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfeGmvH16v
— Do you want to know what brought me here ? He says to me, letting go of the railing with his hands.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCm8BSFAiUW
He opens his arms wide, closes his eyes and falls forward, screaming in rage. Despite my efforts to hold him, his leather jacket slips through my fingers and I let go.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yEsc2kRM4
— Jessy, no ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmpevJxfwm
I scream as loud as I can as I see him fall into the void.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1CIQ5Bbf5s
I put my hands to my mouth while closing my eyes, not daring to open them because I am so sure that he has thrown himself under the wheels of the vehicles passing underneath. And then I suddenly realize that I care about him much more than I wanted to admit to myself until now. Yes, he's HIV positive, angry at the whole world and he spends a lot of time telling me off and yet, without knowing why yet, I can't help but think about him every minute. Suddenly, I hear him scream again at the same time as thunder cracks near us. I slowly open my eyes to see him hanging by his legs above the void. With a quick movement, he manages to stand up, then sit down again on the railing before coming back to my side. I admire his flexibility as I breathe with relief. He rushes straight towards me angrily.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvInAw4EoC
— I'm going to die, Meg, my life expectancy is so low that it's not worth living ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnYcZxfbIcO
His voice is thick with anger and despair.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCg9TOe7ZyF
— No, I said, crying. You're not sick and you may never be sick, but you have to keep breathing, keep fighting this shit ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLsFjjtNKS
— To do what ? What awaits me in this cursed life ? Everyone will start turning their backs on me again, whispering in my way, being afraid of me.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK5MD3IQrUc
Do you think that’s what it’s like to live ? 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNf66C2speE
He points to the highway.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmRw6KS4Eq
— AIDS has already made me fall into a void, vehicles have already crushed me. And none of your prayers or hopes can save me ! he shouts.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNQ5EpUSrP
My tears increase in the face of my helplessness. Jessy is going to die, it's just a matter of time and, in this second, I am fully aware of it.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpCtgjrDGoX
— This virus is circulating inside me and nothing anyone says or does to me will make it go away ! I will have to live the little time I have left carrying this burden alone ! I can't, I can't take this anymore. Reliving what I experienced in Allentown is beyond my strength ! 440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJNs7N1ZJmB
He lowers his arms, weariness written on each of his features. Cries that he has had to repress many times flood his face. I go to snuggle up against him, immediately his arms embrace me.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKfFrgTpUm
— I’m here, you’re no longer alone. I'm here Jessy, I repeat to him several times, hoping that my words penetrate his bruised heart.440Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9pOoGMQmQk
Above us the storm calms down as the rain unleashes, mixing our tears with those of the sky.
Penana
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