It was late in the afternoon when Ritsu had got off from work. He had rushed straight to the College's Dormitory, and ran into Kei's room where he was still asleep.
"Details." Ritsu demanded with a straight face as he looked down at his slumbering friend.
Teff rubbed the back of his neck and sighed, "Look, Asian dude... I'm still not really sure what happened. All I know is that I found that jerk of a jock beating Kei up, and the next thing I know I was giving that same jerk a broken nose."
"Kei was being beaten!?" Ritsu turned to Teff with confused but mostly angry eyes, "Why?!"
"I don't know! I just told you that I wasn't sure! Like I told you he had a panic attack again— “
“Wait. Did you just say again? You mean this wasn’t the first time?!”
“W-well, there was a couple of times inside of the College, but— “
“Teff,” Ritsu breathed in, “I thought that I would be able to trust you with Kei. It looked as if he trusted you too, but I don’t see how you’re able to take care of him. You just can’t.” Ritsu turned away and sat down right next to Kei.
Teff clenched his fists, “What do you mean?”
“You know Teff, it was hard for me to believe that you had one of the highest results in your class, but having investigated it myself I have to. I know you aren’t that dumb.” Ritsu took his phone out of his pocket and showed Teff the pictures that he had saved.
Observing its contents, Teff frowned. “What the heck is your job?” he grabbed his phone and swiped, seeing more and more information that surrounded his background. “Stalking me? Seriously, dude? You can’t get creepier than that.”
“I’m just a normal computer Engineer. It doesn’t take much to google you, you know. You’re not that hard to find on social media too.”
“Cut it, Ritsu!” Teff threw Ritsu’s phone back into his hands, and glared at him, “What are you planning on doing to Kei?” that was a rare moment where Teff actually called Ritsu by his name.
Ritsu squinted at Teff, having difficulty seeing him without his glasses, and said, “You can’t take care of Kei, so I’m taking him away from here. Don’t worry, Teff, you go to the same school, you’ll still see each other.”
“Wait, so what happened the last time is going to become a permanent thing?!” Teff was reminded of the day that Kei had spent the entire day at Ritsu’s place, and the lunch that he had thrown into the trash.
“Would you stop yelling!? He’s sleeping!” Ritsu stood up and shoved Teff.
“You’re the one who’s yelling! Ever since you came here, Kei hasn’t been himself!”
“Oh, and what do you mean by that? You mean that he has been happier?”
“Wha- no! I mean that-… I- that’s not what I meant!”
“Teff, I know that you are very fond of Kei, but just listen to me for a while. You can still spend time with him.”
“I know that!”
“Then why are you so against this? Just think about it, Teff. This way, Kei would be much safer and comfortable. Just let him go! It’s better for him this way.”
“I won’t.” Teff said as he pressed his lips together, glaring at Ritsu.
“Why? This isn’t very mature of you for a college student. You’re not making any sense.” Ritsu sighed exasperated and sat back down on the bed, “You are very complicated to deal with.” He rubbed the back of his neck and closed his eyes, “There’s no stopping me from doing this. Not Kei, not you.”
Suddenly, a small groan came from Kei as he turned on the bed. His eyes fluttered open and his sight was greeted by both Teff and Ritsu.
“You guys are noisy.” Were his first words after waking up.
Teff breathed in a sigh of relief, “Kei! Are you al— “
“Are you alright?” Ritsu leaned in closer to Kei to check for anything wrong, looking into his eyes worriedly. In the back, Teff bit his tongue to prevent himself from saying anything unnecessary.
“I’m fine.” Said Kei, who flinched when he moved just a bit.
“It doesn’t look like you’re alright. We need to get you checked by a professional just in case.” Ritsu stood up and gently took Kei by the hand, “Let’s go, we can take my motorbike. It’s faster.”
Nodding, Kei stood up, wincing when he felt a tinge of pain around his stomach. His eyes strayed over to where Teff was, and he asked, “Is Teff coming?”
Ritsu stopped and looked back at Teff, who was looking at him with a blank gaze. “I don’t know. Is he?”
Teff gave Kei a big grin and gave him a two fingered salute, “Nah, I don’t think I would be able to fit on that motorbike. Plus, it would look very weird for three guys, am I right? When you get back, can I have some of your specially made ice candy, Kei?”
Kei gripped Ritsu’s jacket for support, an act that didn’t miss Teff’s eyes, and said, “Ah… it’s winter, Teff. The Ice Candy shop is closed.”
“Oh, I see. Well then,” Teff jumped in Kei’s bed and made himself comfortable, with his hands locked behind his head, “I guess I’m just going to have to chill over here for the time being! Woo! Kei’s room!”
“That’s settled then. Come on, Kei.” Ritsu helped Kei walk out of the room, not before sparing one last glance towards Teff. The older of the three sighed when he saw Teff stick his tongue out at him. How Kei was able to tolerate the guy, Ritsu didn’t know.
“Kei, I really think that you should come live with me.” Said a worried Ritsu, stationed right beside Kei.
“I thought I already gave you my answer the last time you asked, Ritsu.” Kei rubbed his stomach, which was covered with a brace.
“I know, I know, but Kei, please. This is for your own good.”
“I’m not that weak. I’ve been living like this for the past few years, and so far nothing bad has happened.” Kei blew away his bangs, annoyed they keep blocking his vision.
“Nothing bad!? Kei, I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but you’re in a hospital right now. I think we have very different definitions of ‘bad’.” Ritsu rubbed his temples, “I wanted to respect your privacy, so I refrained from… stalking, but I just couldn’t help myself.”
“Wha- again? I thought you got rid of that habit, Ritsu …”
“Kei, you’re too calm about this! Why aren’t you more concerned?” Ritsu was bordering on frustration. He moved behind Kei and gathered his shoulder length hair into one ponytail, using the hair tie he took from Kei’s wrist to secure it with a tie.
“I’m way past the point of getting concerned over one breakdown after experiencing a thousand others. How long am I supposed to stay here?”
“At least a month.”
“No, I’m getting out now.”
“What- Kei!” Ritsu clenched his fists.
“I have college, Ritsu. I need to study. One month away and I wouldn’t be valedictorian.” Kei pushed the covers off of his body and prepared to get off the bed.
“No, no, no, no, no, no just why!? Both you and Teff are so frustratingly unreasonable that I want to pull my hair out!” Ritsu groaned and buried his face in his hands.
“What about Teff?” Kei paused in slipping his feet in slippers, to look back at Ritsu, “You’ve been talking to him?” he furrowed his brows, meeting Ritsu with narrowed eyes.
“Yes, but Kei, look, I know you and him are friends, but it doesn’t seem like he’s fit enough to take care of you.” Ritsu stood up from his chair, looking down at Kei as he crossed his arms.
“I’m not a child anymore, I don’t need someone to look after me. What did you tell him, Ritsu?” Kei wasn’t yelling, one thing that Ritsu was happy for since Teff wasn’t exactly what you would describe as quiet.
“I told him that I would get you to live with me no matter what, and that he wasn’t doing great in terms of being a friend.”
“Why would you do that?”
“Because I’m your friend, and I will do what it takes to make sure that you’re safe.”
“I appreciate, it, Ritsu, but no, I’m not going to live with you.” Kei slowly walked away.
“Kei!” Ritsu could only yell as he watched Kei close the door. He couldn’t just let him leave, this was a serious matter. With determination, he ran after the stubborn man.
“Kei, why can’t you just understand!? I’m doing this as your friend!” Ritsu grabbed Kei by his arm, forcing him to stop. “Why do you never listen to me!?”
“Let go of me, Ritsu!” Kei didn’t want to deal with him right now.
“Are you mad at me? Well then be mad, just get back in that room!”
“Yes, I’m mad at you, Ritsu. I’m mad because you think that I can’t handle myself, I’m mad because you think that I’m just some crazy nut job who can’t go a day without breaking down and having a panic attack. I don’t need your pity! I’m not that fragile!”
“I don’t think that you are a nut job, Kei. Stop being so overdramatic!”
“I’m not being overdramatic!”
“What are you, a teenager!?”
“Uh, last time I checked, I’m nineteen, so yeah, I am a teenager!”
“Now you’re just being immature. You have to understand that you aren’t well, Kei!”
“What do you mean by that? Physically, or mentally?”
“That’s not what I meant, Kei, and you know it. At least you get to see Frey—“
“Don’t say her name!” Kei was gritting his teeth, his hands closed into a fist.
“—a. Freya, Kei. Freya. Yes, have you forgotten that I knew her as well? We are all sad about her death, stop acting as if you’re the only one! It’s been two years, Kei, it’s time you got over it.” Ritsu spat out those words with venom, something inside of him changing. Maybe it was his frustration, maybe it was his anger, maybe it was because of the situation entirely, but he couldn’t control himself any longer.
“Shut. Up. You don’t know what I had to go through.” Said Kei in a low voice, he was glaring at Ritsu, both of them not breaking eye contact.
“I know exactly what you went through Kei, that’s why I want to help you!”
“No, you don’t know, Ritsu! How would you!? You weren’t there! You didn’t see her die, you didn’t see her get murdered. Hell, you didn’t see her suffer before she died, but I did. I loved her, Ritsu! I loved her so much, I still do! There’s not a single day that I don’t think about her, and it’s not helping that there is a—… A thing that looks exactly like her, using her image to torture me every day!”
“You think that you’re the only one who loved her!?”
Kei froze at that moment, his eyes wide and his mouth open in what was supposed to be another harsh response. That was… that wasn’t what he was…
Ritsu closed his eyes and let out a very long sigh, and said, “She was very beautiful, she was very charming, she was smart, and so, so, kind. How could I not? Heck, I think there isn’t a single guy in our classroom who didn’t have a crush on her. Ryou and Taki were going to confess, but you just happened to get to her first. If you weren’t there, I’m sure either of them would have taken her.”
Kei was silent. He had turned away his gaze to stare at the ground. Freya always had someone around trying to court her, but it never went far, so he never worried about it. He knew that she was liked by a lot of people. He knew, but he never gave it much thought. He knew. He knew, but he ignored it.
“Kei, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. For a while I was jealous of you, I was mad at you, I was close to even hating you, but I accepted it. I saw how much she changed when the both you got together. She started growing her hair out, she started talking more with others, and she just became more loveable. Very, very loveable. You know?”
Ritsu released a shaky breath, his hands starting to shake as memories flooded back.
“When I heard she died… died in such a way that—she didn’t deserve that! I was devastated. I—I knew that you were too. When you came to me about her voice, the hallucinations, I was… couldn’t believe that I was jealous. I wanted to see her too. It’s one of the reasons why I went ahead and skipped a grade. I wanted an excuse to get away from you, and switching schools was not an option for me. I… I’m sorry. I wanted to make it up to you… I’ve been guilty all these years. I’m sorry.”
Kei was silent. He wasn’t sure how to accept all of this. Deep down, he knew about Ritsu’s feelings for her, but he thought that it had disappeared when they had become a couple. He never thought about how Ritsu felt about it. He didn’t really think about it at all.
“Do you want to play a game, Freya?” asked Ritsu, a young thirteen-year-old in seventh grade, cracking voice, pimples, and the same bespectacled look as always.
“Okay. What game?” asked the young beauty who had yet to blossom to her full potential. Short hair that only reached up to her chin, bounced when she had nodded. Her voice was quiet and petite. Something that Kei would never be able to forget.
“We can play Go but in paper form, I’ll just draw a smaller board.” Ritsu went on making the board in his notebook.
“What’s Go?” asked Freya, who was looking a little embarrassed.
“It’s okay, I’ll teach you.”
“Having trouble with that math problem?” asked Ritsu who looked amused. Freya was hunched over her desk making frustrated noises, until she looked up at the sound of his voice.
“Well… yes.”
“Want me to help you?”
“Sure! I could really use it!”
“Alright, now first you need to find out which formula to use. Observe the question, list out the given and find what it’s looking for…” eighth grade math, Freya always hated it.
“Lucky you, Kei! You got a beautiful gem like Freya at your beck and call.” Joked Ritsu who was eating his food right next to Kei.
“Hahah, yeah. I’m very lucky.” Said Kei fondly, his eyes looking down at the contents of his lunch box.
“Make sure to treat her properly, okay? A girl like that shows up once a century at our school.”
“Of course I will.”
“Kei… why aren’t you paying any attention to Freya? She’s your girlfriend, go to her.” Ritsu said with a frown.
“She told me that it’s alright. She said that I can have time for myself, and to be honest I can’t spend every single day with her. I don’t want to lose all my friends.”
“You think that we’re just going to leave you because you got a girlfriend? Come on, man, we’re not that bitter. Right? Taki, Ryou?” the two others nodded. “Now go to her, she’s all alone over there.”
“Alright…”
“Kei? Kei… Kei, I’m sorry.” Ritsu took a step closer and held his arms, “Please…” he begged, his voice close to cracking.
All of the sudden, he was surprised with a hug.
“I’m sorry too, Ritsu… I miss her too… we both miss her… so—so m-much.” whispered Kei, who was sobbing into his shirt.
Ritsu looked on shocked, his eyes wide, until his face expression softened and he returned the hug. “Crying already?” tears started to gather around his eyes, “You always cried so easily back then. I—I’m not crying, by the way.” His breaths started to become uneven, and his grip on Kei’s clothing grew tighter. “Th-this is just eye sweat!”
Kei laughed as his tears soaked Ritsu’s shirt, “That sounds so gross…”
“You’re gross… don’t wipe your—hic—snot on me.”
From the other side of the corridor, Teff stopped on his steps toward where he thought was Kei’s hospital room. A snack of take out French fries inside of a plastic bag, because he knew that aside from tomatoes with eggs, potatoes were the next thing as close to a favorite food for Kei. He had just arrived. He didn’t hear what the two were talking about, but the next words that left Kei’s mouth were loud and clear.
“I’ll move in with you, Ritsu.”
Well, that’s another thing to make the load heavier for him. Teff grit his teeth and began to walk away from them. He opened up the sealed French fries and began to eat them, chewing on them aggressively. Teff wasn’t jealous or anything. He knew that the two of them were as straight as a ruler. No, he was mad. So guiltily mad.
Mad at Ritsu for showing out of now where like the hot glasses guy he is, mad at Ritsu for being a childhood friend that knew more about Kei than he did, mad at Ritsu for trying to take Kei away even though Teff knew that really wasn’t the case, he was mad at Kei for accepting it, and he was mad at himself for feeling mad.
WHY WAS HE FEELING SO MUCH ABOUT THIS? Kei wasn’t the only friend in his life. Teff was a popular guy! He is funny, he is charismatic, he is handsome, he is smart, and so much more.
Teff exited the hospital building, huffing and shoving his hand into the bag of fries and throwing it inside of his mouth. As he chewed, salty tears fell from eyes. Oh great, now he was crying. He was such a drama Queen.
“Um… sir?” asked a nurse who was standing outside of the door. Teff had stopped when he started crying, and a man with tears in his eyes as he’s aggressively eating French fries was not the kind of person you’d want to see when you’re visiting a sick family member. “Are you alright?”
“Hm?” Teff looked around at the amount of eyes that were drawn to him, and then back at the nurse who was looking at him nervously. “Huh? Oh, nothing… j-just… good fries.” He did his best to grin and wiped away his tears with his arm. “I’ll be going now, sorry for the disturbance.” With that, he left.
A/N: 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl5jL21G0De
I'm working on another pet project (I should really stop doing that), It's a prequel to Ground Yourself. It's called Free Yourself (I'm so bad at naming things) and it's about Kei's life when he first met Freya.
It starts with his life back in Japan at the start of seventh grade and ends with her rape and murder during the ninth.
If you guys are curious, feel free to check it out when I've already posted it (which I probably won't do until I finish this story, because I'm working on disciplining myself to stop writing new stories when I haven't finished others)
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