十、42Please respect copyright.PENANA3tLVjcEUdD
42Please respect copyright.PENANAKDVcLw2Fit
42Please respect copyright.PENANAbxPiiBynAI
42Please respect copyright.PENANANM8BTDrsDP
42Please respect copyright.PENANAez7Tw3NPfS
42Please respect copyright.PENANAqnFQzGqFYN
開春後,街市逐漸恢復了以往的車水馬龍,轂轆隨著馬蹄,混出馬車特有的聲響,最終停在黎家門前。42Please respect copyright.PENANAPRcI0MHWTX
42Please respect copyright.PENANA4Vf8MAzvMU
等待已久的黎絳洵上前將車中的父母扶下車。42Please respect copyright.PENANAIaTvQTYb8N
42Please respect copyright.PENANAqzHZcfpImz
自那日以後未曾再與黎絳洵說過話的言曇岫早已張羅好洗塵宴,餐桌上母親說著旅途中的見聞,言曇岫配合著母親誇張的說詞,即便只有他們兩人在對話,仍是歡聲笑語不絕。42Please respect copyright.PENANAcsgbfyd6wL
42Please respect copyright.PENANANZwcOLnqgY
「不過,洵兒都沒說話,是不是有什麼事情想說啊?」母親關切地探問著。42Please respect copyright.PENANArW6tjMDFF3
42Please respect copyright.PENANAlVXpmHc1Ht
黎絳洵闔上書,一個眨眼過後,他才說:「娘,我想明……」42Please respect copyright.PENANAUIHwNdGdhj
42Please respect copyright.PENANAFfaHc8srEw
言曇岫忽然一陣咳嗽,甚至手肘碰掉了杯盞,破碎的聲音淹在茶湯裡。42Please respect copyright.PENANAmCmIh8Ot2c
42Please respect copyright.PENANAChP6m6DrBb
「是不是染上風寒了?最近乍暖還寒,要是病了,你也別勉強,要請大夫來看啊。」42Please respect copyright.PENANArQwTJ7LMxR
42Please respect copyright.PENANAn5HWEXSvTq
「謝謝夫人。」言曇岫摀著嘴點頭,剛離開椅子,黎絳洵便走過來,拉住他的手腕,不讓他蹲下。42Please respect copyright.PENANAThfCRbxiOw
42Please respect copyright.PENANAjbxX7lfEt1
言曇岫維持著原本的動作,黎絳洵換上笑臉後說:「娘,我想先送曇岫回房好了,你也知道,他沒人盯著的話,根本不會好好休息。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAhkFChBWTD4
42Please respect copyright.PENANAg8Z5D15cqV
得到母親首肯後,黎絳洵扣著言曇岫的手腕,邁出門檻,沒多久就走到了燈火無法照亮的陰影中,言曇岫停下後冷冷說:「可以了,鬆手。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAo3ilyq73Hr
42Please respect copyright.PENANAIx4NZdJTEy
「你……」42Please respect copyright.PENANAWNhDrTImPP
42Please respect copyright.PENANAah5g9XcyhW
言曇岫定了定神,而黎絳洵只是放開手,卻沒有回頭的打算。42Please respect copyright.PENANA33a7cartRz
42Please respect copyright.PENANAMuwrpaUiaB
呼吸在驟冷的空氣裡變得吃力,且刺耳。42Please respect copyright.PENANAvxVnnwKnoV
42Please respect copyright.PENANASH7ZhllmnA
言曇岫盡可能讓自己完全面無表情,「我明明跟你說過了,不要做讓你會後悔的事。即便你真的放心讓我照顧父母,你又打算怎麼向他們解釋?無論你用什麼理由,他們都不會信你會在父母在的情況下出門太長的時間。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAy1pryUTyEU
42Please respect copyright.PENANAcAUF8tkXEI
「但我還是要走。」黎絳洵微微側頭,即便眼角餘光、也瞥不見言曇岫衣角。42Please respect copyright.PENANAZOstNKeM5L
42Please respect copyright.PENANAGX4Y8hNiXR
言曇岫忍著胸口不適,強迫自己說:「你要為了這件事情,擔不孝罵名嗎?原就是沒有必要的事,何況你根本不擅長瞞你父母。」42Please respect copyright.PENANA2lHaC3FUdE
42Please respect copyright.PENANANArASf6edf
黎絳洵收回原本就什麼也看不見的目光,「你不明白……」42Please respect copyright.PENANAoWt6tMPhPp
42Please respect copyright.PENANAE769G3eC1r
言曇岫打斷他,質問道:「你覺得我不明白什麼?你分明最清楚,你遠行的理由,無論是避開我,或者尋人,都不能真正解決問題。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAFdyrasqf0k
42Please respect copyright.PENANAhHUS3sXHjz
黎絳洵的聲音像從喉頭硬生生壓出來一樣:「你知道那無法說服我。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAG3wVBizlTA
42Please respect copyright.PENANAR5QddvEhsR
「就如同我看得出你說謊時的小動作,你的父母,真的看不出來嗎?」言曇岫伸手扯住黎絳洵的袖子,苦澀道:「算我求你,別離開,我不會再踰矩。你不是想知道我許了什麼願望嗎?我只求上天讓你得償所願。絳洵哥哥,別離開。」42Please respect copyright.PENANA1hF7e1Sfx3
42Please respect copyright.PENANA5oy7LP5590
黎絳洵沉默了很久,才說:「那樣做,你會很痛苦。」42Please respect copyright.PENANA9fUQtUy9uN
42Please respect copyright.PENANA40nLg5jWsU
「無論你如何做,我都會痛苦。」言曇岫的鼻子一陣發酸,用乾啞的嗓音說:「人總是作繭自縛,可解鈴還須繫鈴人,只有我能讓自己出去,而不是你。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAKwJXREuD1w
42Please respect copyright.PENANAQGU47ECKnv
言曇岫知道對方的緘默是動搖了,於是他鬆了手,「你早些休息。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAQq1zPbGZah
42Please respect copyright.PENANA6gmTvs4h9W
在所有人都應當深眠的時辰,言曇岫睜開毫無睡意的眼,濃重的夜色讓視力失去作用,他翻身面牆,縮著身子,好沒容易才緩過呼吸,哽咽過了許久才成為語句:「是我貪求。」42Please respect copyright.PENANA9SJouTmE7C
42Please respect copyright.PENANAcu2Jg60iH8
當言曇岫將黎絳洵在這段期間打點好的行囊卸下時,黎絳洵沒有開口阻攔,自此而後,他們之間隔著一汪無法越過的涼水,沒有人再提起這件事,只是也無法回到原本的位置。42Please respect copyright.PENANA4cTDJj2SpH
42Please respect copyright.PENANAXNiqRnq5R7
就這麼渾渾噩噩地過著,也許一生……就能毫無波瀾地結束了。42Please respect copyright.PENANAkvdtemFNba
42Please respect copyright.PENANAxaJOUNwIt1
言曇岫臥病在床時,一直緊抓這句話不放。42Please respect copyright.PENANAAX834Co5Nv
42Please respect copyright.PENANAYWIUaNWd8n
黎家長輩憐他怎麼忽然就病倒了,言談岫卻慶幸如此,因為他已經失眠太久,寧可就這樣一直昏睡下去。42Please respect copyright.PENANAS9izXcRjGb
42Please respect copyright.PENANAHwF4WNI1ui
都說大難不死,必有後福,或許此番重病後,他能看淡,或有不同際遇。42Please respect copyright.PENANAHjGBcKqv67
42Please respect copyright.PENANAAJHD39ko5a
再能清醒時,言曇岫第一眼就望見黎絳洵趴在床邊的睡臉。42Please respect copyright.PENANAfOjHtp2BPA
42Please respect copyright.PENANASKM51d5Mv4
儘管想伸手觸碰,言曇岫還是壓抑下來,只有目光始終貪婪,無法撤離。42Please respect copyright.PENANAfolL3SGZH2
42Please respect copyright.PENANAIzQ9S8nXG0
朝陽的光點點墜落在黎絳洵身上,言曇岫聽見他夢囈著:「別再走丟了……」42Please respect copyright.PENANAXgQiDAsy8o
42Please respect copyright.PENANAtrwFBF6bTh
──願你得償所願。42Please respect copyright.PENANAt8k5ZUmG2h
42Please respect copyright.PENANAYp6GVJKsDL
言曇岫默禱著。42Please respect copyright.PENANAhcOLRtI6wD
42Please respect copyright.PENANAfBZ6SJOLk7
病癒後的日子,和過去並沒有多少不同,會在寒涼的夜裡壓上被衾的貓也許久未曾進房,成年後的言曇岫不再每次拒絕有花娘相伴的應酬,只有接待他的清倌知道,言曇岫在秦樓楚館也不過是在等待天明,踏著濃重的霧氣,走過清寂的街。42Please respect copyright.PENANAkkMMDC9gc0
42Please respect copyright.PENANAUhvQCDfye0
時而他會前往頗負盛名的寺廟求神明保佑黎絳洵實現心願,時而他只是在香火繚繞中愣神。42Please respect copyright.PENANACgcIhzWjbU
42Please respect copyright.PENANAf6RygLiOiM
黎絳洵那邊,似乎也與往常無異,尋覓多年的人始終沒有線索。42Please respect copyright.PENANAoCucklHTGk
42Please respect copyright.PENANAuufEmfev4o
轉眼已是夏末秋初,言曇岫去給義塾送一些生活物資,請夫子在秋分前代為轉交給孤苦無依的學童後,正在門前告別,驚馬掠塵,他沒多想,才將反應不及的孩子扯開,不料塵煙中,有馬車追至,言曇岫在失重中,受了點輕傷。42Please respect copyright.PENANATNDNAsnx2y
42Please respect copyright.PENANAlPrzxJfhii
他從甫因護他而摔倒的人懷中起身,還沒從漫漫塵沙中辨認出面容,已先聽見熟悉的聲音,緊摟著他的懷抱陌生,他卻捨不得掙開。42Please respect copyright.PENANAhLbXx4ugnK
42Please respect copyright.PENANA1S21m9qTf5
「你怎麼這麼難讓人放心?」黎絳洵無奈地說,忽然定住不動。42Please respect copyright.PENANAEqCyNQzyMJ
42Please respect copyright.PENANAI5g8wCB3dA
言曇岫原本打算站好後再問黎絳洵為何在這裡,黎絳洵卻沒鬆手讓他起身。42Please respect copyright.PENANApku1mKflU6
42Please respect copyright.PENANACu9sVW1dy3
為了佯裝沒事,省去尷尬,言曇岫勉強自己開口說:「你救了我很多次,我能做的只是希望,將你的善意延續下去,或許這世間緣法千萬,也能讓你在找的人得到溫柔對待。」42Please respect copyright.PENANA5F2sAcBsrN
42Please respect copyright.PENANAKRlLhT7VDp
不知為何,黎絳洵一直沒有說話,言曇岫本想確認黎絳洵是否受傷,卻被叫住。42Please respect copyright.PENANAdPm93FpfjV
42Please respect copyright.PENANAaiPs7AZsi5
言曇岫抬眸,原先相熟只是前段時間被贖身嫁人的花娘朝他走來,擔憂地問:「言公子,你還好嗎?」42Please respect copyright.PENANAfdScr64qmv
42Please respect copyright.PENANADv3AGBUVJc
言曇岫定了定神,正要接受對方的好意,隔著手帕藉她身過來的手起身,手腕霎時被制住,言曇岫困惑地沿著看過去,黎絳洵已拉著他起身,並把他掩在身後。42Please respect copyright.PENANAoni87FJdMj
42Please respect copyright.PENANAw4r6MUFg6P
「這位是……」言曇岫正欲介紹,黎絳洵用力一握,言曇岫低頭望自己被勒紅的手腕。42Please respect copyright.PENANARwlXwQDXvW
42Please respect copyright.PENANAbRrftwIjbK
黎絳洵和那位姑娘客套幾句,也沒讓言曇岫開口,就拽著人上了來時的馬車。42Please respect copyright.PENANAbfqRwkguLD
42Please respect copyright.PENANABQj1kZa8Cs
言曇岫幾次偷覷黎絳洵,黎絳洵彷若未覺,直到將至黎家,言曇岫推窗望向逐漸熟悉的街景,黎絳洵突兀地開口問:「那是你心上人嗎?」42Please respect copyright.PENANAZvWEG6Zzmi
42Please respect copyright.PENANA8wHDV2mByN
「她嫁人了,我們只是認識而已。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAKSubBsreyP
42Please respect copyright.PENANAtGHTs6IvYN
「你……」42Please respect copyright.PENANAiT113m6Gxy
42Please respect copyright.PENANAhO4Rqf8x0Z
言曇岫沒聽見黎絳洵後面的話,正要回望黎絳洵,馬車已停。42Please respect copyright.PENANAzQrV29i3Az
42Please respect copyright.PENANAESgFcjwXBg
言曇岫先下了馬車,將手伸向黎絳洵,直到言曇岫意識到黎絳洵可能並不樂意讓自己協助,正要收手,黎絳洵忽然緊攢言曇岫的手指。42Please respect copyright.PENANA0vVBROXGuK
42Please respect copyright.PENANA1mcsm7m8gO
「絳……」42Please respect copyright.PENANA3tPHnhwY6C
42Please respect copyright.PENANAKHH4LdbaAY
黎絳洵下了馬車,逕自將言曇岫拉入自己房中。42Please respect copyright.PENANANupOKMkEUg
42Please respect copyright.PENANAyaQpRUpJ0J
言曇岫侷促不安地望著黎絳洵剛闔上門的背影,他們之間的空氣中有浮塵和著光。42Please respect copyright.PENANAsy6j9B1feM
42Please respect copyright.PENANAk9BvhqkpL4
「我一直在想,我很可能只是裝得太像常人,其實已經瘋了很久。可是你……你一直擾亂我的記憶,這讓我很混亂。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAl78UhSKrKq
42Please respect copyright.PENANAPOewvq5kPG
「絳洵哥哥,你怎麼了嗎?」42Please respect copyright.PENANAYKt2puk5IE
42Please respect copyright.PENANAaeGHgZwdnj
黎絳洵轉身與他錯肩而過,取出藥箱後說:「衣服脫下來,我替你上藥。」42Please respect copyright.PENANA0kPr3KyaUP
42Please respect copyright.PENANAAr8v0KOQbp
「我可以自己……」42Please respect copyright.PENANAnTC51evBXb
42Please respect copyright.PENANAJy9XtBfHJF
「你碰不到。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAoN7Xxbhhhb
42Please respect copyright.PENANANwgMn5ss9D
言曇岫第一次看見黎絳洵露出這樣鄭重的表情,他只能遲疑地背過身,脫下塵土與裂痕遍布的衣衫,直到上半身的衣著盡數褪下,他將所有髮絲撩至肩前。42Please respect copyright.PENANA7V2xxgSJxR
42Please respect copyright.PENANA86b7cbMGiM
黎絳洵似乎一直沒有動,言曇岫轉頭瞥向傳來貓叫聲的窗,裸露在外的皮膚只有不歇的寒冷侵襲,雖然不曉得黎絳洵怎麼了,只是貓叫聲越來越響亮,言曇岫直接走過去開了窗,冷風拂面,迫不及待的貓立刻跳了進來。42Please respect copyright.PENANA0xjd789MI2
42Please respect copyright.PENANApyQ9rxz9qz
「你背後的、不是,你知道你身上有奇怪的傷疤嗎?」42Please respect copyright.PENANAcA4hnHpMzZ
42Please respect copyright.PENANAewBtfXtC0q
「傷疤應該很多,只是我看不見,也不曉得你說的是哪一個。不過娘親說背部靠近腰的位置,有一塊胎記,附近應該有一個像是言家家徽的疤。小時候,言小姐覺得胎記和印泥的顏色一樣,偷拿了家主的印信玩,少夫人說是我帶壞小姐,把印信過了火,按在那附近。」言曇岫說這些的時候,視線一直跟著貓,反應過來時,黎絳洵已經緘默很久了。42Please respect copyright.PENANA5fQlbkaOXn
42Please respect copyright.PENANAxviuY57EBW
言曇岫拿起原本的衣服說:「牠開始咬人了,應該又餓著了,我先去餵牠。」只是還沒將衣服穿上,冰涼的觸覺忽然在後腰暈開。42Please respect copyright.PENANA9S52NIZ00E
42Please respect copyright.PENANA9iIvmLjAi7
原本下意識要躲開,想明白是黎絳洵在替他上藥,言曇秀才將衣服整理好、掛在手臂上。疼痛的感覺並不明顯,那種摔法,表皮的傷不會很重,如果傷到比較裡面的肌肉或骨頭,也是明天才會真的痛起來,言曇岫對痛楚原就十分習慣,反而是黎絳洵的手指更讓他在意,他只能專注在不斷咬著褲腳的貓,以免再次讓黎絳洵察覺他還沒完全走出來。42Please respect copyright.PENANAAEr6d1LjwG
42Please respect copyright.PENANAns8IIKgJPL
因為不能動的關係,言曇岫又忙著物資支援給義塾的事情,逐漸犯睏起來。42Please respect copyright.PENANATsHtCXVxyS
42Please respect copyright.PENANAG8oixBAhZp
「你有心上人了嗎?」42Please respect copyright.PENANAze0REaWMQo
42Please respect copyright.PENANAsbl9ZVQAWc
言曇岫想假裝沒聽見黎絳洵的問題,歛眸任由倦怠感散往四肢,作勢打了呵欠。42Please respect copyright.PENANA1hkFUj3I1f
42Please respect copyright.PENANAFtm8mNSDxf
也不曉得自己是真的無法思考,還是不願意思考,黎絳洵話後面的意思,對他來說始終很難懂。42Please respect copyright.PENANA1bUHtHqvCe
42Please respect copyright.PENANApz1twfMkWI
「若你,有了想雙宿雙棲的對象,也不一定要留在這裡,」一次漫長的氣流過去,黎絳洵的聲音彷彿從很遙遠的地方傳來:「要是你想離開,這次,我不攔你。」42Please respect copyright.PENANAaxyCZWD6UZ
42Please respect copyright.PENANANdWJJmkbIQ
42Please respect copyright.PENANAGyAiksgAJi