Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3bN9u76KH
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFGSZILWXS
“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfBi9fImN4m
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIjTxR6GqUt
The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWoAusL1hnx
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvuhMzkveWY
“I love you,” he said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXNWPTb78p
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg8IhKxiTVC
“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2DxLhhLYp
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhvFtvLy5en
“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBeop3SAvs
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX1XUvx5rpW
“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡda2UCofxRy
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZAuohSFfX
“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTppKdeapf2
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2I8BOlYkN
“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExwatlepTO
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kZusYUeuL
“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhVUK7Ro9Z
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJwoGKnxpv
She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyfzZUmmDC4
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxPKuXPkfHf
The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbyxsail5S
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkDZ10Hqy9
Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡke03iRwejG
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8WSDqVXJjS
“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqK0yKX4mNm
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqdrv0VWREb
She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwIn9Gj4wNM
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4n8GwuilG
It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBlpwEmSibq
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkuxbAsxdQ
He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxghpdZzyM
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJJXBmnwNo
Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kpb3q8yYW
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHSXrSsZRI
He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3fC80H0Dg8
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKs09ctLfh
He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm9StTyOrwg
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKApQylvbB5
He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQ2MU5mcYI
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpkQZW4zCX
One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH76WBJ8mnK
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv543PVrKOf
“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb0nIVocfXW
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJum8BXYUv2
“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5eJ5XrJbD
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2qF4zcXEi
“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPGULe96B0c
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRA53hAOQQ
“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVuo9Tp0O1k
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsd0X14kwMX
Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpe6fMelS9H
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6UBMc2B0pc
“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxiQDWeqLP
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9VmU0K7l6
“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD9UQWvGLnz
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡygnZNRvOEe
“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzf3O41gI8N
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpPck8uHojH
“Oh, Master’s then?” 436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5xP4rWFJ7
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzSe1iZBpx
“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4SHVWCzrpY
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddCX2JImhV
“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxA65JMoXL
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblCHm2KZ0d
Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqmOr8LDUn
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvCULB7cdI
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05nrbpNRVI
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuFtwxrtu3
Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHSzgLHR1c9
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3T1P6UCLaQ
He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx0kFyL488r
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRDt7UczyOM
He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLdBOijREB
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrI13jsYJu3
He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZxmlH7DZn
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5VGKKX3Jx
He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbjlaEjoTZ
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ994XEJLeGh
It isn’t possible.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQdD5yyZatM
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnQhD1FirSW
He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtBrsgDXGD
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVK6bx3UHKB
He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGADI7OLUP
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPx6zdWL11f
Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1LpsuwYP3
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1NAiysPzj
If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj21UIrDc5c
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtNSzkr8p6m
But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ79u3VgSWET
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NDJ5Emlal
Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUaHrJshRu9
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfRbuwBc26
“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExUr7Xw6tt
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86Wtdw7YA4
“Like what?” he said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUm1iy1ePOH
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYAxvL3tqD
“Getting married, having kids,” she said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6qivTDteC
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpsLJk1kyV
“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoeamQelNbG
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGruv4YSKxM
“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6WPUS8XxXQ
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdg6Rr8pWtJ
Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDVezNbetaa
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACiTmjcTWf
“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODuaELlU6h
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fJAkLY6r6
Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm8DrsdDYLZ
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa79PmpKulT
“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmwhIym7E9a
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Xpnmbm3PV
This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cYwU4WzCw
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DQTrO15XE
Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡonkYJzorVF
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTRGpClRJEe
Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmureepI1J
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQa834Zmo6N
“Who are you?” she murmurs.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxsUuOn6rS6
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEi2eKNhOu
He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8JbWAp1uk
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHm4PQcZplE
“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6ftkYZuF3
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiNs9iVWDvz
“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nDyS8Xh74
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJGq5o5gaY
He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6d8kIIKe0
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGw120hjiQK
“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsV83ReIXN
436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2aU2Qt24ds
He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.436Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXkHFERL6Bv
Penana
search
Loginarrow_drop_down
Registerarrow_drop_down
