1、假设御天迷路了，然后遇到了漂流。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogrTFpwRuq
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3VJGtmQiYJ
漂流：又迷路了吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Kh4MRUmS5
御天：切，我只是在闲逛，你滚远点，风景里有你都变差了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1PvgKx6Cg
漂流：要去哪儿啊，我送你去呗。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4skh4T0ZD7
御天：都说了你滚滚滚滚滚！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07I8Hj3D8Z
漂流笑而不语，一会儿道：我跟剑鬼消息了，他说你们在小雷酒馆集合，这都差了大半个城了，你怎么能迷到这儿来的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7ML27VPv4
御天：要你管！我跟公子要卷轴过去。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡco9mQR8xSG
公子（消息）：卷轴5000金。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡal8jqM3UQ7
御天：QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65EnQtCPev
漂流：你看，所以说还是我送你过去吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJREYActWOI
左手&右手一齐点头。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQkRCIaC5V
漂流：今天的风景挺好的，我们走走看看过去好了。反正你已经迟到了，也不差再晚一点。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVyzuT4LqmT
御天：……你他妈走就走！拉我手算什么！给我放开！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGnDk7IIkv
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0NMl79dQUc
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGBNLOzmf8
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi2qa5shmVr
2、有一天，大家一起在小雷酒馆喝酒。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡauphmptmZh
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnD2VyiizW
公子：小雷，这酒不错，再来两杯。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡscjRI3Or5y
小雷：好~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fpoDXUVUJ
御天：公子好像已经喝了好几杯了，怎么还要喝啊。酒有那么好喝吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWIm5HN2Qy
战无伤：这是大人的爱好，小孩子你就不懂了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwYJQZpKPc
御天：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcNI2WZWb1
佑哥：不过公子喝了那么多……我算算，大概得有5000金酒钱了吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh638m5h1e9
战无伤：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1kCtk77j3
剑鬼：重要的是，待会儿我们好像有任务，他喝成这样我们还能做任务吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtMn2aYjKS
众人：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQXFGbDeCm
公子已醉，面色红润，东倒西歪。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsEeOjISvg
佑哥：那个，要不谁来阻止一下他？（小声）反正我是不敢……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsD8QqtYhW
战无伤&御天：我也……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzLozqkZWC
剑鬼笑而不语。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1D42PO6sS
千里：一群人婆婆妈妈的是不是爷们啊，我来！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowqfQwSHXF
众人：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ej9pXOFvt
千里（一把夺走公子手中的酒杯）：公子，别喝了，要做正经事，赶紧的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvCub47BWH
公子（媚眼瞪来，看似秋波暗送，实为横眉冷对）：还来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9b4PG5vICC
千里：别喝了，这都几点了，做完任务我还赶着下线呢。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDsuiABqZh
众人：切~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDi3MfCBAzB
公子（不断往千里身上靠，伸手去捞酒杯）：还来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3PuRU0hnw
千里（慌乱状）：喂，你别乱来啊。大庭广众的……你给我下去，下去。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmQag8Mz48L
公子（整个人都坐到了千里的身上，蹭来蹭去）：还来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuX46nL2eVZ
千里：擦！你们别光顾着看，帮忙啊！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYyyjhH49Nc
众人：你爷们你自己搞定。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjSm7yQJNU
千里分身无术，只得趁乱自己把酒给喝了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmIPtBGg67b
千里：好了好了，走了走了，做任务去。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wNj1b7lfX
公子：嗯？这里好像有酒的味道，是藏在这里了嘛？（摸着千里的唇）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfSZiAnFwm
佑哥&剑鬼默默看向两边，战无伤蒙住御天的眼睛。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6uq2C6Pf9U
御天：干嘛蒙住我，我要看，我要看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSKWRH98rd
公子按住千里的脑袋送上香吻一个，千里瞪大着眼睛看着公子妖孽的面容近在咫尺。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ynrB4WR8T
系统：您的心跳过快，为了您的身体健康，系统将在十秒后强制离线，现在开始倒计时，十，九……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYv8BFZfyQR
于是只见白光一闪，千里从酒馆消失了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GYYsEZofO
公子：切，怂货。小雷~再来两杯酒。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdclQHZ1Ux
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVw4dVx7zOX
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCYIn7etro
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9xVAvy3da
3、和漂流一起做任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4MxKzFWFc
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp5P6oMHOKR
御天：为什么这个家伙会在这里！！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMP5Q3ITBX
剑鬼：咳，漂流是过来帮忙做任务的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFInWaFIhV
御天：强烈要求把这个家伙踢出队伍！他一定是来当奸细的！奸细！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaapSdyaHYn
剑鬼：好了，我们来谈一下这次任务怎么分配。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6u4tL6sld
御天：……QAQ（被坐在旁边的漂流微笑着顺毛）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoOvINutN6
公子：这一次的任务是千里弄来的，啧，又是一个越级的奇葩任务，线索也不是很明确。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UZt6xPBKJ
千里：嘿嘿。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUR7uVm3wc4
公子：首先是主城沙漠古城的北部有一个教堂废墟，根据任务提示，里面应该会有线索。剑鬼和千里去那边调查一下，随时在频道里报告情况。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAcS8ZtcIdo
千里&剑鬼：好。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufwtrqWp02
公子：接着是所谓城外有关海市蜃楼的传言，那是我们最终要去的地方。佑哥和战无伤一起去打探一下，找一下有没有入口。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlONS6372P
佑哥：包在我身上了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCFGyaDG7vt
公子：然后是那个强盗寨子，剩下还有谁？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cvWzV9WRB
御天：我，我。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu8LAxDqkNJ
公子：嗯，那你和漂流一起去打探一下情况。左手也去，右手和我留在城里做接应。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKk2tTF9Or
御天：我反对！我不要和这个家伙一起行动！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxeXpiMEK2
公子：反对无效，你能自己找到寨子的位置吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGOTVIi4hb
御天：……QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0o3qc6mlm
公子：好了，那就出发吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopfLNBsxbB
公子掏出卷轴，白光一闪，众人便从小雷酒馆里消失了，随后九个人便一起出现在了主城沙漠古城里。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriAjZdzsQD
御天：公子，可不可以我和佑哥去查海市蜃楼，战无伤跟着你，让右手和那家伙去寨子，反正他们三个人经常一起行动。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGh3Wzbf6M
战无伤：我去！我难得一次不当保镖我容易吗，别跟我抢啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGX7y9riSlz
公子：漂流他们都看不到佣兵团频道，联络起来不方便。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhge3kpK0Bc
御天：那，那我就跟战无伤换，让战无伤跟着那家伙好了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQC5scGl8W
佑哥：别啊，带你去，到时候我是找入口还是找你啊……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQHCv9u6nE2
御天：……QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58Y84CPwiS
于是漂流开开心心地搂着呆滞中的御天出发了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUekaDeBcP
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrOrP4tLKj
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwris6ngph
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRigTWeRDp
4、和漂流一起埋伏。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8WAuIggls
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZkqASx8tN
御天：……我们为什么要在草堆里埋伏……我们不是来跟NPC打探消息的吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3ccU8Ubys
漂流：这里的NPC比较特殊，都是强盗，指不定一见面就直接化身开怪，所以我们要先观察一下。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqF0fSmFlN
御天：那左手为什么不来埋伏？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjMiin73og
漂流：全部都埋伏了，就没有人和NPC说话了啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8f00eB3toJ
御天：我可以去，你和左手埋伏观察好了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynQpQoocVk
漂流：可是那样的话我会不放心啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaAtN9Kr61
御天：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0Awj4f0fs
左手和第一个NPC说话，没有被砍。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKjFGE1ijD
御天：好像没什么危险，要么我们也出去吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNmamv2vbqG
漂流：不好说，等等再看看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc2KXX0kR52
左手和第二个NPC说话，还是没有被砍。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1eQVNiZPi
御天：好像真没什么危险，我说你是不是太胆小了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OD09BaTDT
漂流：不是胆小是谨慎。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡboczSbys5V
左手和第三个NPC说话，依旧没有被砍。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtUGaH1csy
御天：好像真……………………TMD你在摸哪儿！你敢吃我豆腐！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlt29ojxqGN
漂流：我只是怕你蹲久了身子麻，帮你揉一揉。乖~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMJpNlDHO8
御天：滚！蹲久了也用不着揉【哗——】啊！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fvMgaCW6m
（佣兵团频道内）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOEu1E4NoEb
御天：我抗议！我正在被那个家伙性骚扰！QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05ukKxDudx
众人：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesTXqNxTRJ
公子：啧，漂流眼光真差。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIx7RbNrq2v
千里：就是。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8UHClGN0pY
众人：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjXMYEFZ0L
御天：靠！你们这对狗男男。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNJYylFxu5
御天决定自救，遂掏出家伙对着漂流。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQcD4iI1vo
御天：信不信我现在就砍了你。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡICmARF7xQs
漂流：距离太近了，你射不到我的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xKLpbbXMf
御天：靠！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflY2ihdu7Y
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPevOpwu56
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOpqlQnyBYg
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyFaSoVMcas
5、又到了一年一度的情人节，游戏里也举办了活动。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmVtA7nF5Q
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMURppOj5b
剑鬼：系统通知都收到了吗？情人节貌似有特殊任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYu5BIbuk48
战无伤：情人节任务关你什么事，你连对象都没有。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPleQ9cSoon
剑鬼：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5kOmO3gpBg
佑哥：根据我的情报，貌似也不是只有情侣才能做任务，还有单身的任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkBpCiTr77
御天：啧，你们这群光棍就去做光棍任务吧，我去找葡萄妹子陪我做情侣任务，哈哈。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6A8WDDeg2r
众人：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH7JsWKaIZz
御天欢天喜地地奔去找葡萄妹子了，剩下的三人结伴来到街上，打算去接任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvE8xysCDN
剑鬼：任务怎么接？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWNVBfeRPt
佑哥：听说是找城里的NPC接，具体还没有打听到，但听说一看就明白。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7O2Fw31ibk
战无伤：是指那个吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpSG7dp0wsd
战无伤指着不远处一排卫兵，只是与平时不同的是，几乎每个卫兵头上都戴着一个写着“死”字的头巾。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPD4YW65JJ1
佑哥：大概……走过去看看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkyZGMjRwy
三人走到一个戴着“死”字头巾的卫兵面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4CIb6WpHj
剑鬼：情人节任务怎么接？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJi263x0dWg
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！拿好这根火柴，去烧掉10对“隐秘的情侣”就可以成为我们的高级团员，我在这里等你消息。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWmkuXhUeQ
系统：是否接收道具“光棍之棍”？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHp8RTe6z1n
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkbWuy7yVr
战无伤：怎么样怎么样，我看卫兵好像给了你个什么东西？武器？加什么的？啧，一上来就发东西，真大方啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bd5cCrDuV
剑鬼：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhG2O1hj9h
战无伤：嘿嘿，我也去领一个，你们等着。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKNE6uxZ6f
过了一会儿，战无伤领好任务回来了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmPIN825gbi
战无伤：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavd17ChQrj
过了一会儿，佑哥也领好任务回来了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvjtRECqTYw
佑哥：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJsBiFVRKbc
剑鬼：不知道没有带头巾的卫兵有什么区别？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9oL3P8p12v
佑哥：再去试试看呗。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFrmArgt1w
三人走到没有带头巾的卫兵面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjfNjwPa8C
剑鬼：情人节任务……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9IcS9ujLhi
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……咦？你是去死去死团的！！不要烧我啊！我没有女朋友！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGK35rZypcV
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDc4jlX9PN
（与此同时，同城的另一个角落）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DlkjuOl56
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……你们看，我连礼物都买好了，是她一直想要的项链，你们可不可以帮我送去给她？这对戒指就当做酬劳送给你们好了，上次买来被她嫌弃难看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNjBGf83Ih
系统：是否接收道具“情侣戒指”？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46tOWx9Np8
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0ysxayGNO
剑鬼&佑哥&战无伤千辛万苦终于烧完情侣回来了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ125d7m0SCm
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！干得好，你们真是去死去死团的楷模！这个礼盒是成为高级团员的奖品，里面的东西你应该用得上。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcFFcILk73
三人打开礼盒后，发现都是自己职业用得上的装备。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9Q8FGxCRb
佑哥：还真是普通的奖品啊，不过属性还不错。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVRsN2o1za
剑鬼：我这个没什么用，还没有我现在用的那个属性好。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwT31P261x
战无伤：奖品算什么，烧情侣才是重点。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdj5snscTKy
佑哥&剑鬼：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQ68gVgGpt
这时，三人突然看见御天气势汹汹地从远处走过来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJis006tJL
佑哥：哎，御天，情侣任务的奖品是什么啊？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjfajOOA9W
御天：…………………………漂流在哪里！！让我烧了他！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7v1mvpoYF
然后御天又气势汹汹地踩踏着红尘滚滚地离开了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHOh4M1KKf
佑哥：御天怎么了？吃火药了？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohv6orRmJD
公子：他只是被漂流坑了，不能和葡萄一起做情侣任务了而已。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuT37qbT7Ui
佑哥：这样哦。哎哎？公子你来了？咦？千里也在。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3JV57xDUK
公子：想知道情侣任务的奖品？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAi7aNt5H2j
佑哥：是呀，是呀，公子你知道。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHJnUDYotZ
公子：就是这么个玩意儿。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1zCSs6GnO
公子从衣服里掏出了一枚戒指，随意地扔在众人面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCCnBCCFUg5
佑哥：我看看。情侣戒指，任务物品，不可交易，火法抗性+20%！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrz74XBwz99
剑鬼：数值挺高的啊。不过火法抗性对你没什么用吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6vs8APGf6
公子：活动的噱头而已。一开始发任务时候就给的，任务完成后可以永久持有。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLzk2Lts39
战无伤：等等！公子你和谁一起做的任务！难道是去重生紫晶借的妹子！这样的好事怎么不叫上我啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkvaOaZY6m
公子：和千里做的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8KL6zLJZez
战无伤：原来是和千里做的啊……神马！和千里！男人也行！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRiJCLTecKW
公子：谁跟你们说过情侣任务只能男女做。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj4a5qaHcto
战无伤：靠！无耻！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2U9tIRx5R
（N个城外的某个角落）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUzeYxzLKHc
漂流：我说，你总是这么追杀我，我都没法去找那个谁的女朋友了，任务完成不了对我们谁都没好处。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE331NuAqnb
御天：去死吧！谁要跟你完成情侣任务！完成不了最好！去死去死去死！！！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0GQBL0IRGr
漂流：都说了这么近你射不到我的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPdbt41hMo
御天：那就滚远点！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdd558TnNKX
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZ5kSZ14TX
* 补充：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dPAfYrJpx
如果不是两个人去找非去死去死团的NPC：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWOg5duwoU
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……对啦，我有女朋友的事情可不要跟我旁边的兄弟说，他们是去死去死团的，我怕我会被烧掉。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrOrqz2PgK
如果领好了情侣任务再去找去死去死团NPC：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaVSMQc3JJ
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！神马！你们是情侣！烧掉！！（受到卫兵火法攻击，不过情侣戒指的火法抗性针对该NPC是100%的，记得带好就不会挂。）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2mpyyxGJWV
关于情侣任务里的卫兵的女朋友：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGc4jI9WOfC
看起来貌似找到就可以了，不过其实是个boss需要打一打。把项链交给女朋友后，女朋友会很快注意到情侣玩家身上携带的情侣戒指。虽然是自己曾经嫌弃的东西，但是看到戴在别人的身上依旧会暴走。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTY24D1sMK6
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1cVFO8IF3
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgzRGPTMuBt
6、佑哥在练级区泡到一个妹子。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdpUnP0mQI
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwblptVazw
妹子：哎？你真的是佑哥？那个无所不知的佑哥？（星星眼）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbJfDL7MaB
佑哥：是啊，你有什么想知道的尽管问我。（自豪状）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJcXbgpCeu
妹子：那你快告诉我双鬼谁攻谁受！我纠结这个问题好多年了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHZiO5dnYZ
佑哥：额，公子和剑鬼？不是啊，公子和千里才是一对。咦？妹子你要去哪里？等等我呗〜51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRE6goQsw1
妹子：小晴！我的CP被拆了！酒鬼大大居然跟那个叫千里一醉的是一对！我的双鬼啊！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxDgXgXpTr
小晴：哦，我无所谓啦，反正我是公子总受派的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNGTfwL3JWl
佑哥：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqrND2fdAJ
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGIrQPAoipE
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhySu1ARXG0
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1skvQLuzH
7、有一天，御天在三次元里碰到了漂流。（私设）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHfAkbDCki
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEANEdZhk9s
御天：QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUFuCRgKev
战无伤：怎么了？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzsL7NtjJW
御天：我今天遇到漂流了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKUF0SKjcE
战无伤：你不是天天都遇到他么。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkM779kWLs
御天：不是说游戏里，是在电梯里遇到的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6bZaYnUWl2
战无伤：哪儿的电梯？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NmY4NDCDA
御天：家里的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwjVRKKW3c2
战无伤：哟，你们还是邻居啊？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyx1xc7Uqd
御天：对啊，我也不想的！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHEwC1RMXH
战无伤：[蜡烛]51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZNtiPT8g7j
（过了几天）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgViw8wM3ej
御天：漂流你给我滚出来！有种你跟我单挑！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZvSYz5kR13
战无伤：他又怎么你了？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4GRdquLkG
御天：他守我电梯！现在每天都得跟他搭同一部电梯下楼，真是生不如死！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa62snR7mYJ
战无伤：[蜡烛]51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOtg08jbMQB
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7H6rmRYCH
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4ZzdCOxtX
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDUx1vFuSW2
8、小雷又研究出了新的酒。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡof7xeKUIhB
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFmCsM0K9c
小雷：公子，这是我新弄的酒，系统酒馆都没得卖呢。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxs0FM6qwK
公子：哦？不错，来一杯尝尝。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDK0cINhoNn
于是小雷很开心地跑进去把新酒端了上来，然后小心翼翼地看着公子品尝。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR56RKLSS20
小雷：怎么样？还不错吧。我觉得公子会比较喜欢这种口感，所以特地配的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HJLqxBmcG
公子：嗯，不错，知我者小雷也。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuyJ6TRhxK
小雷：嗯嗯。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE0JtgM7dJ8
公子：小雷，我突然发现，你才是我生命中最重要的人。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0NTP0Oojpc
小雷：公子！（泪花闪闪感动状）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Ub992sV7W
公子：小雷！（泪花闪闪感动状）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdi0tGwsndn
千里突然有了深深的危机感。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeP5onpvytO
佑哥：嘿嘿，新酒不错啊，小雷也给我们上一份吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvmpkCWqrc
小雷：你们？哦，做这个酒挺费时间的，我做了好几天才做出几杯，都要留着给公子呢。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡseyuBEGq11
佑哥：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TpnRO3Ssk
小雷：不过倒是可以给你们喝点别的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uPUNIU6Ml
过了一会儿，小雷又端上来几份不属于系统酒的不明液体，一人一杯地放在众人的面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaCKyMPV2u
佑哥：……这是啥？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6RbEgq4LtM
小雷：研究过程中的副产品，看在你们是公子的朋友的份上就免费给你们喝好了。用的材料也很贵，倒掉怪浪费的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vvP19iBss
佑哥：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiO42TbiVQD
众人突然有了深深的危机感。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡky9OEyKFUv
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ70SSM17Aw9
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5UFjklpOL
FREETALK51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8xCuP33L7
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEkQfyxNrC
感谢收养这份……没什么意义的段子集XD。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpIqg6vpVST
看完近战以后就很HAPPY地各种脑补，并弃无数坑于不顾地来写近战的段子。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLSKbQt2jRH
近战里一直很很很很很喜欢漂流，直到他黑掉，我惊悚脸啊！御天也非常可爱，每次碰到漂流都一副炸毛的样子，我于是便当机立断这是一对XD（神马逻辑！）。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZZOjgWCv5
韩家公子也是我超喜欢的类型，智慧型美男啊~~~~~然后每次公子指点江山，我都会很YY地想着，公子你果然不愧是贤内助。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrKKzKfg79
然后是御天和战无伤，万年泡妞无果二人组，这两个人一老一少一搭一唱总觉得也很有意思~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV2gtCTVOHI
剑鬼是最最最正直的真汉子！所以脑补他每次被众人的各种欢脱弄得无语到麻木，于是笑而不语。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOv8YiOFlJD
至于佑哥的话，情报王嘛~ 情报=八卦（不对！）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWWbxuSdJx
总之，如果以后还有机会也会在写近战的段子~欢迎大家来我微博或者博客上看哦~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjL8dcV205B
以上~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHpsBiRhBu
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjrPPObRuf
2013年11月
ns3.137.189.49da2 51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3VJGtmQiYJ
漂流：又迷路了吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Kh4MRUmS5
御天：切，我只是在闲逛，你滚远点，风景里有你都变差了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1PvgKx6Cg
漂流：要去哪儿啊，我送你去呗。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4skh4T0ZD7
御天：都说了你滚滚滚滚滚！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07I8Hj3D8Z
漂流笑而不语，一会儿道：我跟剑鬼消息了，他说你们在小雷酒馆集合，这都差了大半个城了，你怎么能迷到这儿来的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7ML27VPv4
御天：要你管！我跟公子要卷轴过去。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡco9mQR8xSG
公子（消息）：卷轴5000金。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡal8jqM3UQ7
御天：QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65EnQtCPev
漂流：你看，所以说还是我送你过去吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJREYActWOI
左手&右手一齐点头。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQkRCIaC5V
漂流：今天的风景挺好的，我们走走看看过去好了。反正你已经迟到了，也不差再晚一点。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVyzuT4LqmT
御天：……你他妈走就走！拉我手算什么！给我放开！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGnDk7IIkv
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0NMl79dQUc
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGBNLOzmf8
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi2qa5shmVr
2、有一天，大家一起在小雷酒馆喝酒。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡauphmptmZh
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnD2VyiizW
公子：小雷，这酒不错，再来两杯。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡscjRI3Or5y
小雷：好~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fpoDXUVUJ
御天：公子好像已经喝了好几杯了，怎么还要喝啊。酒有那么好喝吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWIm5HN2Qy
战无伤：这是大人的爱好，小孩子你就不懂了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwYJQZpKPc
御天：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcNI2WZWb1
佑哥：不过公子喝了那么多……我算算，大概得有5000金酒钱了吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh638m5h1e9
战无伤：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1kCtk77j3
剑鬼：重要的是，待会儿我们好像有任务，他喝成这样我们还能做任务吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtMn2aYjKS
众人：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQXFGbDeCm
公子已醉，面色红润，东倒西歪。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsEeOjISvg
佑哥：那个，要不谁来阻止一下他？（小声）反正我是不敢……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsD8QqtYhW
战无伤&御天：我也……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzLozqkZWC
剑鬼笑而不语。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1D42PO6sS
千里：一群人婆婆妈妈的是不是爷们啊，我来！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowqfQwSHXF
众人：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ej9pXOFvt
千里（一把夺走公子手中的酒杯）：公子，别喝了，要做正经事，赶紧的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvCub47BWH
公子（媚眼瞪来，看似秋波暗送，实为横眉冷对）：还来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9b4PG5vICC
千里：别喝了，这都几点了，做完任务我还赶着下线呢。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDsuiABqZh
众人：切~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDi3MfCBAzB
公子（不断往千里身上靠，伸手去捞酒杯）：还来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3PuRU0hnw
千里（慌乱状）：喂，你别乱来啊。大庭广众的……你给我下去，下去。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmQag8Mz48L
公子（整个人都坐到了千里的身上，蹭来蹭去）：还来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuX46nL2eVZ
千里：擦！你们别光顾着看，帮忙啊！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYyyjhH49Nc
众人：你爷们你自己搞定。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjSm7yQJNU
千里分身无术，只得趁乱自己把酒给喝了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmIPtBGg67b
千里：好了好了，走了走了，做任务去。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wNj1b7lfX
公子：嗯？这里好像有酒的味道，是藏在这里了嘛？（摸着千里的唇）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfSZiAnFwm
佑哥&剑鬼默默看向两边，战无伤蒙住御天的眼睛。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6uq2C6Pf9U
御天：干嘛蒙住我，我要看，我要看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSKWRH98rd
公子按住千里的脑袋送上香吻一个，千里瞪大着眼睛看着公子妖孽的面容近在咫尺。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ynrB4WR8T
系统：您的心跳过快，为了您的身体健康，系统将在十秒后强制离线，现在开始倒计时，十，九……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYv8BFZfyQR
于是只见白光一闪，千里从酒馆消失了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GYYsEZofO
公子：切，怂货。小雷~再来两杯酒。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdclQHZ1Ux
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVw4dVx7zOX
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCYIn7etro
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9xVAvy3da
3、和漂流一起做任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4MxKzFWFc
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp5P6oMHOKR
御天：为什么这个家伙会在这里！！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMP5Q3ITBX
剑鬼：咳，漂流是过来帮忙做任务的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFInWaFIhV
御天：强烈要求把这个家伙踢出队伍！他一定是来当奸细的！奸细！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaapSdyaHYn
剑鬼：好了，我们来谈一下这次任务怎么分配。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6u4tL6sld
御天：……QAQ（被坐在旁边的漂流微笑着顺毛）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoOvINutN6
公子：这一次的任务是千里弄来的，啧，又是一个越级的奇葩任务，线索也不是很明确。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UZt6xPBKJ
千里：嘿嘿。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUR7uVm3wc4
公子：首先是主城沙漠古城的北部有一个教堂废墟，根据任务提示，里面应该会有线索。剑鬼和千里去那边调查一下，随时在频道里报告情况。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAcS8ZtcIdo
千里&剑鬼：好。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufwtrqWp02
公子：接着是所谓城外有关海市蜃楼的传言，那是我们最终要去的地方。佑哥和战无伤一起去打探一下，找一下有没有入口。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlONS6372P
佑哥：包在我身上了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCFGyaDG7vt
公子：然后是那个强盗寨子，剩下还有谁？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cvWzV9WRB
御天：我，我。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu8LAxDqkNJ
公子：嗯，那你和漂流一起去打探一下情况。左手也去，右手和我留在城里做接应。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKk2tTF9Or
御天：我反对！我不要和这个家伙一起行动！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxeXpiMEK2
公子：反对无效，你能自己找到寨子的位置吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGOTVIi4hb
御天：……QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0o3qc6mlm
公子：好了，那就出发吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopfLNBsxbB
公子掏出卷轴，白光一闪，众人便从小雷酒馆里消失了，随后九个人便一起出现在了主城沙漠古城里。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriAjZdzsQD
御天：公子，可不可以我和佑哥去查海市蜃楼，战无伤跟着你，让右手和那家伙去寨子，反正他们三个人经常一起行动。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGh3Wzbf6M
战无伤：我去！我难得一次不当保镖我容易吗，别跟我抢啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGX7y9riSlz
公子：漂流他们都看不到佣兵团频道，联络起来不方便。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhge3kpK0Bc
御天：那，那我就跟战无伤换，让战无伤跟着那家伙好了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQC5scGl8W
佑哥：别啊，带你去，到时候我是找入口还是找你啊……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQHCv9u6nE2
御天：……QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58Y84CPwiS
于是漂流开开心心地搂着呆滞中的御天出发了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUekaDeBcP
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrOrP4tLKj
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwris6ngph
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRigTWeRDp
4、和漂流一起埋伏。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8WAuIggls
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZkqASx8tN
御天：……我们为什么要在草堆里埋伏……我们不是来跟NPC打探消息的吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3ccU8Ubys
漂流：这里的NPC比较特殊，都是强盗，指不定一见面就直接化身开怪，所以我们要先观察一下。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqF0fSmFlN
御天：那左手为什么不来埋伏？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjMiin73og
漂流：全部都埋伏了，就没有人和NPC说话了啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8f00eB3toJ
御天：我可以去，你和左手埋伏观察好了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynQpQoocVk
漂流：可是那样的话我会不放心啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaAtN9Kr61
御天：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0Awj4f0fs
左手和第一个NPC说话，没有被砍。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKjFGE1ijD
御天：好像没什么危险，要么我们也出去吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNmamv2vbqG
漂流：不好说，等等再看看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc2KXX0kR52
左手和第二个NPC说话，还是没有被砍。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1eQVNiZPi
御天：好像真没什么危险，我说你是不是太胆小了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OD09BaTDT
漂流：不是胆小是谨慎。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡboczSbys5V
左手和第三个NPC说话，依旧没有被砍。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtUGaH1csy
御天：好像真……………………TMD你在摸哪儿！你敢吃我豆腐！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlt29ojxqGN
漂流：我只是怕你蹲久了身子麻，帮你揉一揉。乖~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMJpNlDHO8
御天：滚！蹲久了也用不着揉【哗——】啊！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fvMgaCW6m
（佣兵团频道内）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOEu1E4NoEb
御天：我抗议！我正在被那个家伙性骚扰！QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05ukKxDudx
众人：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesTXqNxTRJ
公子：啧，漂流眼光真差。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIx7RbNrq2v
千里：就是。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8UHClGN0pY
众人：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjXMYEFZ0L
御天：靠！你们这对狗男男。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNJYylFxu5
御天决定自救，遂掏出家伙对着漂流。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQcD4iI1vo
御天：信不信我现在就砍了你。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡICmARF7xQs
漂流：距离太近了，你射不到我的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xKLpbbXMf
御天：靠！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflY2ihdu7Y
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPevOpwu56
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOpqlQnyBYg
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyFaSoVMcas
5、又到了一年一度的情人节，游戏里也举办了活动。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmVtA7nF5Q
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMURppOj5b
剑鬼：系统通知都收到了吗？情人节貌似有特殊任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYu5BIbuk48
战无伤：情人节任务关你什么事，你连对象都没有。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPleQ9cSoon
剑鬼：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5kOmO3gpBg
佑哥：根据我的情报，貌似也不是只有情侣才能做任务，还有单身的任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkBpCiTr77
御天：啧，你们这群光棍就去做光棍任务吧，我去找葡萄妹子陪我做情侣任务，哈哈。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6A8WDDeg2r
众人：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH7JsWKaIZz
御天欢天喜地地奔去找葡萄妹子了，剩下的三人结伴来到街上，打算去接任务。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvE8xysCDN
剑鬼：任务怎么接？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWNVBfeRPt
佑哥：听说是找城里的NPC接，具体还没有打听到，但听说一看就明白。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7O2Fw31ibk
战无伤：是指那个吗？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpSG7dp0wsd
战无伤指着不远处一排卫兵，只是与平时不同的是，几乎每个卫兵头上都戴着一个写着“死”字的头巾。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPD4YW65JJ1
佑哥：大概……走过去看看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkyZGMjRwy
三人走到一个戴着“死”字头巾的卫兵面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4CIb6WpHj
剑鬼：情人节任务怎么接？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJi263x0dWg
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！拿好这根火柴，去烧掉10对“隐秘的情侣”就可以成为我们的高级团员，我在这里等你消息。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWmkuXhUeQ
系统：是否接收道具“光棍之棍”？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHp8RTe6z1n
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkbWuy7yVr
战无伤：怎么样怎么样，我看卫兵好像给了你个什么东西？武器？加什么的？啧，一上来就发东西，真大方啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bd5cCrDuV
剑鬼：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhG2O1hj9h
战无伤：嘿嘿，我也去领一个，你们等着。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKNE6uxZ6f
过了一会儿，战无伤领好任务回来了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmPIN825gbi
战无伤：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavd17ChQrj
过了一会儿，佑哥也领好任务回来了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvjtRECqTYw
佑哥：擦！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJsBiFVRKbc
剑鬼：不知道没有带头巾的卫兵有什么区别？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9oL3P8p12v
佑哥：再去试试看呗。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFrmArgt1w
三人走到没有带头巾的卫兵面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjfNjwPa8C
剑鬼：情人节任务……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9IcS9ujLhi
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……咦？你是去死去死团的！！不要烧我啊！我没有女朋友！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGK35rZypcV
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDc4jlX9PN
（与此同时，同城的另一个角落）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DlkjuOl56
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……你们看，我连礼物都买好了，是她一直想要的项链，你们可不可以帮我送去给她？这对戒指就当做酬劳送给你们好了，上次买来被她嫌弃难看。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNjBGf83Ih
系统：是否接收道具“情侣戒指”？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46tOWx9Np8
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0ysxayGNO
剑鬼&佑哥&战无伤千辛万苦终于烧完情侣回来了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ125d7m0SCm
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！干得好，你们真是去死去死团的楷模！这个礼盒是成为高级团员的奖品，里面的东西你应该用得上。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcFFcILk73
三人打开礼盒后，发现都是自己职业用得上的装备。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9Q8FGxCRb
佑哥：还真是普通的奖品啊，不过属性还不错。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVRsN2o1za
剑鬼：我这个没什么用，还没有我现在用的那个属性好。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwT31P261x
战无伤：奖品算什么，烧情侣才是重点。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdj5snscTKy
佑哥&剑鬼：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQ68gVgGpt
这时，三人突然看见御天气势汹汹地从远处走过来。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJis006tJL
佑哥：哎，御天，情侣任务的奖品是什么啊？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjfajOOA9W
御天：…………………………漂流在哪里！！让我烧了他！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7v1mvpoYF
然后御天又气势汹汹地踩踏着红尘滚滚地离开了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHOh4M1KKf
佑哥：御天怎么了？吃火药了？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohv6orRmJD
公子：他只是被漂流坑了，不能和葡萄一起做情侣任务了而已。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuT37qbT7Ui
佑哥：这样哦。哎哎？公子你来了？咦？千里也在。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3JV57xDUK
公子：想知道情侣任务的奖品？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAi7aNt5H2j
佑哥：是呀，是呀，公子你知道。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHJnUDYotZ
公子：就是这么个玩意儿。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1zCSs6GnO
公子从衣服里掏出了一枚戒指，随意地扔在众人面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCCnBCCFUg5
佑哥：我看看。情侣戒指，任务物品，不可交易，火法抗性+20%！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrz74XBwz99
剑鬼：数值挺高的啊。不过火法抗性对你没什么用吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6vs8APGf6
公子：活动的噱头而已。一开始发任务时候就给的，任务完成后可以永久持有。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLzk2Lts39
战无伤：等等！公子你和谁一起做的任务！难道是去重生紫晶借的妹子！这样的好事怎么不叫上我啊。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkvaOaZY6m
公子：和千里做的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8KL6zLJZez
战无伤：原来是和千里做的啊……神马！和千里！男人也行！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRiJCLTecKW
公子：谁跟你们说过情侣任务只能男女做。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj4a5qaHcto
战无伤：靠！无耻！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2U9tIRx5R
（N个城外的某个角落）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUzeYxzLKHc
漂流：我说，你总是这么追杀我，我都没法去找那个谁的女朋友了，任务完成不了对我们谁都没好处。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE331NuAqnb
御天：去死吧！谁要跟你完成情侣任务！完成不了最好！去死去死去死！！！！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0GQBL0IRGr
漂流：都说了这么近你射不到我的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPdbt41hMo
御天：那就滚远点！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdd558TnNKX
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZ5kSZ14TX
* 补充：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dPAfYrJpx
如果不是两个人去找非去死去死团的NPC：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWOg5duwoU
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……对啦，我有女朋友的事情可不要跟我旁边的兄弟说，他们是去死去死团的，我怕我会被烧掉。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrOrqz2PgK
如果领好了情侣任务再去找去死去死团NPC：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaVSMQc3JJ
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！神马！你们是情侣！烧掉！！（受到卫兵火法攻击，不过情侣戒指的火法抗性针对该NPC是100%的，记得带好就不会挂。）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2mpyyxGJWV
关于情侣任务里的卫兵的女朋友：51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGc4jI9WOfC
看起来貌似找到就可以了，不过其实是个boss需要打一打。把项链交给女朋友后，女朋友会很快注意到情侣玩家身上携带的情侣戒指。虽然是自己曾经嫌弃的东西，但是看到戴在别人的身上依旧会暴走。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTY24D1sMK6
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1cVFO8IF3
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgzRGPTMuBt
6、佑哥在练级区泡到一个妹子。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdpUnP0mQI
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwblptVazw
妹子：哎？你真的是佑哥？那个无所不知的佑哥？（星星眼）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbJfDL7MaB
佑哥：是啊，你有什么想知道的尽管问我。（自豪状）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJcXbgpCeu
妹子：那你快告诉我双鬼谁攻谁受！我纠结这个问题好多年了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHZiO5dnYZ
佑哥：额，公子和剑鬼？不是啊，公子和千里才是一对。咦？妹子你要去哪里？等等我呗〜51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRE6goQsw1
妹子：小晴！我的CP被拆了！酒鬼大大居然跟那个叫千里一醉的是一对！我的双鬼啊！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxDgXgXpTr
小晴：哦，我无所谓啦，反正我是公子总受派的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNGTfwL3JWl
佑哥：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqrND2fdAJ
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGIrQPAoipE
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7、有一天，御天在三次元里碰到了漂流。（私设）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHfAkbDCki
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEANEdZhk9s
御天：QAQ51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUFuCRgKev
战无伤：怎么了？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzsL7NtjJW
御天：我今天遇到漂流了。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKUF0SKjcE
战无伤：你不是天天都遇到他么。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkM779kWLs
御天：不是说游戏里，是在电梯里遇到的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6bZaYnUWl2
战无伤：哪儿的电梯？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NmY4NDCDA
御天：家里的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwjVRKKW3c2
战无伤：哟，你们还是邻居啊？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyx1xc7Uqd
御天：对啊，我也不想的！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHEwC1RMXH
战无伤：[蜡烛]51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZNtiPT8g7j
（过了几天）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgViw8wM3ej
御天：漂流你给我滚出来！有种你跟我单挑！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZvSYz5kR13
战无伤：他又怎么你了？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4GRdquLkG
御天：他守我电梯！现在每天都得跟他搭同一部电梯下楼，真是生不如死！51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa62snR7mYJ
战无伤：[蜡烛]51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOtg08jbMQB
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8、小雷又研究出了新的酒。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡof7xeKUIhB
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFmCsM0K9c
小雷：公子，这是我新弄的酒，系统酒馆都没得卖呢。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxs0FM6qwK
公子：哦？不错，来一杯尝尝。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDK0cINhoNn
于是小雷很开心地跑进去把新酒端了上来，然后小心翼翼地看着公子品尝。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR56RKLSS20
小雷：怎么样？还不错吧。我觉得公子会比较喜欢这种口感，所以特地配的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HJLqxBmcG
公子：嗯，不错，知我者小雷也。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuyJ6TRhxK
小雷：嗯嗯。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE0JtgM7dJ8
公子：小雷，我突然发现，你才是我生命中最重要的人。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0NTP0Oojpc
小雷：公子！（泪花闪闪感动状）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Ub992sV7W
公子：小雷！（泪花闪闪感动状）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdi0tGwsndn
千里突然有了深深的危机感。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeP5onpvytO
佑哥：嘿嘿，新酒不错啊，小雷也给我们上一份吧。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvmpkCWqrc
小雷：你们？哦，做这个酒挺费时间的，我做了好几天才做出几杯，都要留着给公子呢。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡseyuBEGq11
佑哥：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TpnRO3Ssk
小雷：不过倒是可以给你们喝点别的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uPUNIU6Ml
过了一会儿，小雷又端上来几份不属于系统酒的不明液体，一人一杯地放在众人的面前。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaCKyMPV2u
佑哥：……这是啥？51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6RbEgq4LtM
小雷：研究过程中的副产品，看在你们是公子的朋友的份上就免费给你们喝好了。用的材料也很贵，倒掉怪浪费的。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vvP19iBss
佑哥：……51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiO42TbiVQD
众人突然有了深深的危机感。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡky9OEyKFUv
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FREETALK51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8xCuP33L7
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感谢收养这份……没什么意义的段子集XD。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpIqg6vpVST
看完近战以后就很HAPPY地各种脑补，并弃无数坑于不顾地来写近战的段子。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLSKbQt2jRH
近战里一直很很很很很喜欢漂流，直到他黑掉，我惊悚脸啊！御天也非常可爱，每次碰到漂流都一副炸毛的样子，我于是便当机立断这是一对XD（神马逻辑！）。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZZOjgWCv5
韩家公子也是我超喜欢的类型，智慧型美男啊~~~~~然后每次公子指点江山，我都会很YY地想着，公子你果然不愧是贤内助。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrKKzKfg79
然后是御天和战无伤，万年泡妞无果二人组，这两个人一老一少一搭一唱总觉得也很有意思~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV2gtCTVOHI
剑鬼是最最最正直的真汉子！所以脑补他每次被众人的各种欢脱弄得无语到麻木，于是笑而不语。51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOv8YiOFlJD
至于佑哥的话，情报王嘛~ 情报=八卦（不对！）51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWWbxuSdJx
总之，如果以后还有机会也会在写近战的段子~欢迎大家来我微博或者博客上看哦~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjL8dcV205B
以上~51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHpsBiRhBu
51Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjrPPObRuf
2013年11月
