Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3VmOGfdGO
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yXyoWT9gz
“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡURqzAgRrf9
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFVAY3pEyB
The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxN6lg2zlTI
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi05lSmzI1Y
“I love you,” he said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLK4ib5Lcby
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6UgDl4XBig
“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2nodDLGVM
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcd6iQYOtg
“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexqzqmnlHZ
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Xrwj3eHPu
“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqKRvWgRAK
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdmYLwO1QVC
“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHdJNPXWGJ
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5uTQBn3dw
“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgyDB6fzUe
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Zh393Mfga
“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gv8FYdQQ6
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She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6c4Hssl8i
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4e92Fjbmjt
The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrBXs1Wjtq
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLKF2nbvkQ
Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzlajWU1hK
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FGel5Pp4x
“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuiS1I5pGg
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOflSzjULD
She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIF2NmBVfZ
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrD029JpfaC
It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWG5Z68EfRo
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZBxxeiULq2
He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVWngwz2sZG
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsyO9hPlQIv
Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1N7EHX6fXm
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRmPWppYwG
He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX4fhx0KQI4
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzLaC7DNIBs
He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgFf4Wu5W4
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPaooWvdrbt
He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpS7cKbFK0
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7NPX63Zxp8
One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rgRP0dzvt
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeow8T1EAbu
“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyYBj3mJT9N
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4TeKOCw7k5
“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjwGHQjhtWk
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnxXpZKxn8
“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYESRkeMwL
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72HSFTKf1P
“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgzivrbz6y
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmv1K15YbD
Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKFjdSP7X3
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuRYrwtmJr
“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUDhocoX0O
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4DYtNRGs9T
“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIArqY9KkoA
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHF8mb1gg0R
“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeb9wtESQpU
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLL3fHHc4G2
“Oh, Master’s then?” 829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡydgMsyUm5Q
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRegZFV5gVn
“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcAzPB7KuJo
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkPBBFHaFE6
“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMdvxztoIG
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBYmmSjGhu
Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6mpvrxgYka
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGnXn4g725
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxP2PS8wQiQ
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5euB124u0
Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO6ZQiV2amI
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Qrq682ehy
He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsSkgoiyNT
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusCTRX7WmN
He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbe8glIrBh
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4yAkcVAR3
He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpPfFrcX7zi
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4jhZMTRo6
He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkNgP78KMK
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtucqvTG5J9
It isn’t possible.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXIwMQhoQv
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQA3BLSKw8
He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc4iJvYRcjk
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dFJHPj8Km
He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlG41K8orF
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIpxiMMAqm
Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOwgOHTQQe
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡraFqYfyl7j
If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44igZWkIc2
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzHfgEZQyz
But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHyxTgqQen
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcRUZBnkBoB
Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMO8fAgmYxx
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZZC09jn9l
“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC0EmLNl71R
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6TD64Mg4u
“Like what?” he said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBBCuYcMdT
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“Getting married, having kids,” she said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepwUnihw4K
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ77mbultbib
“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNnEE3xgab
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlSdRrLtpim
“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWMEdRse2Y
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq18xPSCNwZ
Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmcMRxPnETe
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwEuT36xhR
“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNaOiP5fNN
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxJZubxhWS
Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQmB8f0pws
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorZsaIhcBV
“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡErjNZNDGoE
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9C8m6lu0eU
This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Ffw5f0xzV
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6NlzJ1vIn
Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFtjenLNtrh
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cMpVcG559
Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQ5Tj7KDIu
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS0aONsU7uP
“Who are you?” she murmurs.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3ijBwsTaD
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjwDFFhbW1
He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60DozDNQYr
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1FsqhodB8
“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8QAsQNgLkW
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfiXMmoz1O0
“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5Z2BuZSm5
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOnQ2vTzDlL
He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWAlL0FHjD
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xvdx8ybWN
“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYZGvw2Fe4
829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKaGrnurXZC
He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.829Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuL6nuHA2oK
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