惡名之下
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致不想回想起的記憶
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我不是那種「一般」的孩子372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRInT4mYGRS
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxVAOoH0pC
但特殊得來，又不叫人驕傲的特別372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMMQU6ZgOv
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO6OJrlmEWm
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOWcj3Nostz
童年、成長、至今，我深知自己和其他人的不同，正因如此，我也因為這份特殊與我該在的地方、該有的身分道出分離宣言
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5BVfuM2WEP
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBHBjg14Q0F
不是我害怕372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLB00cHSrG5
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO4DLlXErD5
是害怕自身
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372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjntGYFrMf6
世界很奇怪，只是不一樣的，所謂之「特別」，往往引人恐懼，危險的出現372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiX4UobrExQ
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtFglSeqqS
因為不同，意味改變372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAYM33YBgPs
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6R1ZPwwNyS
縱然沒人希望遇上困難，但又想克服，就只能待困難自己解決、或是自身忽然學懂如何去使吹灰之力的程度372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3QLpYCRYZ
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcBWYNVTs0U
卻現實中，是沒有可能發生此種事，萬物不由己生，正如沒有不勞而獲，其之獲的勞，純粹不是由自己付出而已372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgUWrzgdHFm
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTz24tUDsOs
這道理372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIxXPeGDHC
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSFckSrw6gs
我是明白的372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡREZoFZLcgg
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRLFKdl4HEw
但又現實中，我做不了什麼，我無法展現自己在這方面的認知372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNnmSPoUCnJ
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzDThZAPo8q
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl3BNhjbq7j
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPg6SXj0LUZ
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡarKcOozrji
—— 啪喇 ——372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdI6GDRWCs6
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZmGPVVhv7
「廢物！」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv3gcPoDRkp
「您是吃撐沒事幹嗎？！」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFYjHFEgdxW
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmMdqhic8T
見玻璃零碎散落，深紅沾在純黑的地毯，清脆響亮的聲響堪比硫磺一發，暗中的深紅滿滲若如蚊餐一地，儘管而言並非直對此方，隱約可見利片刺中了自己372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuoddhQRti
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn1gdaQPyMv
「現在有毛有翼曉升天了，作反了哦？！」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANFbn9O9V3
「您究竟是不是真的弱智哦？！」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0uYHd7MFfK
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWgXujaog8
「麻煩製造者⋯您可真是⋯⋯可不可以有點自知之名？」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIw2LDx2HK
「該死⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFmzWKYK9t
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使力擦著額，短棕髮的她伸手到黑木桌子，「咻」一聲扯開櫃門，反手便伸入其中，撥開文具，翻走書本，往當中內最深處伸去372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObGTjcoiDz
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡePscbZuMnn
數聲粗魯的物品碰撞，還有其後那響亮至耳窒的拍門，女性在視野外掏出一白中漂黃的東西
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaoTF7cDXJT
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFPQR3zONW8
象牙製煙斗
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372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20xO40rsnq
勾在嘴裏，同時從胸前口袋中拿出小圓盒，像口紅的造型，倒是金屬製，畢竟說到底才非打份用372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhtvzlaG53h
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGx5VNAbrt
熟練地扭開蓋鎖，拇指彈上開蓋，倒轉在煙斗的填裝位，一滴372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa9sZdWsehE
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fPirpHiCy
「⋯呼⋯⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKHfngw6Tm
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGy6MaFRNR
雜草味，燒靑草的氣味，少許攻鼻，但並不濃，再者也未到刺激的程度，單純是蠻有葉綠味而已，連漂出來的白煙也幾乎不存在，室內散佈最強烈的，唯有植物的味道
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLAuSMESRxk
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCfJfeN9KK
背對自己，她抽著煙斗，看往窗外
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjJWX18ITC
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXvmLHv4K8
不是特別高樓層，當然整座大廈也是己業前提，地方必是自己選址選樓層
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPM0AocqbJA
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FGxw9xGT3
若是較高的位置，是可以看到海景，朝向東邊的海藍天，以及遠方一帶沿海的密集，高樓大廈又有，不起眼的小方塊亦有，熊本縣的各沿海城市，整個一起，掃望而入眼內372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwoxLvAoqV
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBPxmm7xTYt
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3oTNLpd2P
但她不同，她的選擇往往比任何⋯一般人，自己所想的奇怪，然而又有其論點，要說的話，就是她擁有著不同自己，過於複雜而與別不同的想法372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4Z5dNpoT5
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0bropAABgh
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO4Ro5USlYG
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYaVsvHXQXo
作風不一，思考的模式不一樣
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAdAf8Pc3m
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrD8YjviyS
就好比她不打算把辦公室置於上面，而是這兒，這層，剛好不高於窗戶所面向，商店街的頂蓋，的一層
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfh22HIUck3
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNHoUKQ9vZ
看到車站、酒吧街街頭、商場門口，各種
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCp7ekqL5W
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKCrr0bTqIv
因為她要真正的「全景」
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372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpfykjB59b
我真的搞不清楚，嘛，無法理解
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtm06CbQhTu
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3eiahpf3C
好比她究竟是怎樣看待自己一樣
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQs3mjwfbdw
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTWw6w4AVWP
我知道，我也明白自己現在可是搞出大麻煩了，不但引起了刑警的注意，還有引致本地一眾不良、暴走族的騷動，現在回望，嘛，還真是想也想不到自己有這麼的能力372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvtFLMh2zc
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDWj5aaJal
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeo35IR99ry
抑或說，是我一直以來，低估了老姐她的聲譽及影響力372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi20gs0frFS
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxJgOJtHno
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUcZlX3EdH2
山松組的力量372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbEfkaafdn
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmZV4ZAxTe
「您到底⋯什麼時候才會學乖呀？混帳⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqMGgrEgBV
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfJaPhRUcE
回神過來，她已經坐了在那辦工椅上，左腳放右腳膝頭，口中濃吐淡煙，即使口氣稍安定，放大的瞳孔凶剎不爾372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbfcfNg78L
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUllCm0rWTp
她是我的姐姐372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsAiPWl0Um
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRMhbiES4g
山松組的老大372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSZ4JxFNCot
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjw8amsFi7G
大和英加372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnM41ViFDvF
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6T7Q7hgSv
「說話啊」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fhy1auLuN
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSfaJZeyCa0
央百花372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡafp1o5hIhX
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOzDkDLs8n
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YUKChRsnp
我努力地站在原處，就這樣一聲不吭，但是視線一交上，就看不了更多，看不到，尋找不到視線可聚落之處，可是呢，她可還生氣著，直對自己372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuhRgTx7nW
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqqezKpKL2
「⋯我可不會當你啞的」
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgEM0xf87Ac
「⋯⋯你要是不說話⋯那好⋯⋯好⋯」
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdR6CMiXU4N
「就讓我倆在這，一直⋯一直在這」
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIU9XOMB30w
「在這一起浪費時間，反正⋯ 我 · 很 · 閒 」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7anXxWGMOB
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tE3zLTet4
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmgndzqhcO
「⋯⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9T2U40WhpT
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXKsTdD0vv
呼吸聲由緊縫的唇瓣洩出，曾有再多的話，希望反駁、說理，又說不出，不在她面前372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRhi91IdVq
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDenBkEp3Qu
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCvjd7QJEYO
我不只是害怕，畢竟目前為止，一生中最敬重，亦最不喜歡的，也是她，我的姐姐372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHk4vBblenG
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsBVKba5oUT
她為我做了很多，太多，甚至我了解，自己所認知的，只是整幅拼圖的一小塊372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMD5qRUAKp
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvnVEHYaBy5
理應我該做好自己就好了，對她來說是最好了372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvPl6t0GMf
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLomZxpF90j
所以說，我到底做了什麼？372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDX8U0T83G
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtq4cGsKJqh
我在反叛嗎？可能372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfbWJqGPeL
為了什麼？
為了什麼⋯？
成為些什麼的身分？
為了她的認同？
⋯⋯
我不知道
我自己也搞不清楚
回去一開始談到的地方
我選擇了前者
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42pDcpeEtO
讓困難自己解決372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1eBHFP072h
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrwfghtQYLF
但困難就是自己372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5ppd99IFs
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbKs0RVY2i
所以才裝模作樣，卻又成了反效果，或是說，我從來也沒有想清楚任何事情，而衝進去做372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwPiNMiY68
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDiUgWXDBOd
我做事沒腦根、理性，是後來的事情，日益嚴重，動不動就動氣，感性行事，這樣子便不用想了，不用想太多了372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyVZ6YAw8l
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9oENcLSVSH
不用去想更多平時的負面了372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwN3eGH9WMV
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJh7rc7HZk
單憑感覺行事372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBCNHE7uh3
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XqjQfXWN3
這樣子便不用去研究他人的目光、想法，自己的得失，將來的後果，麻煩的各種372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlI7l9EUtRs
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IUvMGUzui
反正本身裏頭已經積累了太多372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFADMVMUxcE
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdmZnlC1U1
確實地問我，是不是很想孤立自己？372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQ0wAxYjMA
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdo5s3DhKe
別開玩笑372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmocXklxZum
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIoedCWwAPw
但我有選擇嗎？372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2xVjagMQOb
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr08SWztbF6
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN458z2oyC8
注定無法「正常」地生活的我，注定混混噩噩過日子的自己，大概⋯本身已經叫姐姐她傷心了吧？372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNlixrDOUtq
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4Zg28P6MV
不過單是自己也是372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRTmyd6rgz
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXO49W2op3N
我不想這樣子372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofRdH0yUX3
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dczevspwn
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUZY7RNOITq
我不希望這樣子的「特別」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINoQY9wdJh
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9czhNWqwik
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2xENueQkG
但對自己來說，所謂的「未來」已是注定的
不能做到什麼
不能實現什麼
那怕是已經放棄得崩潰、討厭自己
也不能有什麼改變
我看不到明天，也看不到昨天
但⋯有分別嗎？
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡICtgFbLMFc
當初的命運已經被注定，因為自己是大和氏，因為和那混帳有關係，因為⋯因為372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxBcct95n5p
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡglU5Pmyyid
我根本沒有能力去保護自己372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz164sgI45v
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGYrfwWuQF
沒有能力372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQf3XrvRgII
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuJdi1MaI3
一直以來也是372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvfoLxiih6
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUReKzbTXu
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8aAFbL9dUO
我⋯⋯372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhKJsyZ5Lv
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDWM1zgpx9
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我372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFJAkw6Dg8
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6KjcRb73Lb
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KQ1hk3fsm
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372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvuPIdTO2N
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxaBR8S6lIN
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我根本沒有選擇372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5oiI6Lkea8
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLjAbGOuHz
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTp3CReOve5
現在的話，選不選擇也沒差別吧⋯372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6L4bIgKrTm
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFJlzYSzpOt
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算啦⋯372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6E5NuR0Ey
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8t3QjZrH5Z
就讓我自暴自棄吧
將我棄之不理吧
但一定，一定
一定會被反對為結果吧
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5hwanx4Io
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNQMjFv0bS
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「⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7xqkSrQml
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怎也沒所謂了372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt6ILnpYDWt
372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8PcaOCuSsY
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「⋯算了」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK52Rlhoths
「我要出去食晚飯了」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPI3urB3knX
「你打算怎樣子呢」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWyjkxMykd6
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「⋯⋯嗯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwptosX3K74
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沒所謂了372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd5mY8cvETK
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「⋯⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUXpdJSaxKl
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反正我就是生下來那刻開始被詛咒了372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYCVqJIeR74
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反正是我自己弄到自己得如此下場372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0qUK2TCG7N
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反正372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnr0t4DjTY5
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「⋯」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jWYCNIGl2
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「笨蛋」372Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXgQlc7yaM
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