向菱出教室,來到走廊上,突然就覺得南雨鎮的三月不存在春天。104Please respect copyright.PENANAuzUKIyYV3m
104Please respect copyright.PENANAibb5PHnmA7
據說祁小波感冒了,所以向菱那天沒有陪她出去玩。104Please respect copyright.PENANA5CE036ZI26
104Please respect copyright.PENANAjmnAi1jRFI
這事是祁澈先和她提的,那時他像是隨口一提,她點點頭,表示回應。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAOdgyyDbLAi
104Please respect copyright.PENANA0AOzKzHwNv
她原本和祁小波約好要一同去公園溜滑梯的,但因為此事,也只好之後再說了。104Please respect copyright.PENANAe7ZIdXuRec
104Please respect copyright.PENANA3L4t411mWV
海邊小鎮的春季多雨,多雲又帶點悶熱,海浪拍打得更加兇狠,雨下得更為頻繁。104Please respect copyright.PENANAyEfyz92eEB
104Please respect copyright.PENANABO5unXgTAw
用一個字來總結就是——躁。104Please respect copyright.PENANAZ4O7JmTNGd
104Please respect copyright.PENANAEW8S0UcjaN
高二下學期的春天,學生們到了適合思考自己生涯的年紀。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA0mhkp0BUTB
104Please respect copyright.PENANAPZOfO7yhI1
台上的教師總會在講課時有意無意地提起,同儕間偶爾也有討論,引起不少人開始規劃。104Please respect copyright.PENANApwCMmd6WGF
104Please respect copyright.PENANA4IwebhzFoF
楊宛和向菱聊到這個話題時,楊宛提起了她的志向。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAcz2vKSllqF
104Please respect copyright.PENANAQjnSsLE8BI
「我故鄉那所大學的服裝設計系!」 104Please respect copyright.PENANAEsWLAX8L4u
104Please respect copyright.PENANAZ9eg9xftPz
幾個同班同學也跟著提出了各自的目標,似乎已經充滿鬥志。104Please respect copyright.PENANADLt39h3CA3
104Please respect copyright.PENANAUIMWWOklNm
某個女同學說道:「我想去北渝市!」104Please respect copyright.PENANAyjQukDlmOM
104Please respect copyright.PENANAgWS4HOnj9C
另一個男同學順著她的話建議,「我也是,要不我們結伴吧?」104Please respect copyright.PENANAcex4Bx0bDl
104Please respect copyright.PENANAuVXS9bEtLl
「哈哈哈哈你們倆還真是般配——」104Please respect copyright.PENANAKMZREsDlsZ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAXHa94MSWEC
眾人笑鬧成一團,那對男女被同學們說得臉紅了。104Please respect copyright.PENANAuPq31vPPOg
104Please respect copyright.PENANAI41OHSoQBy
十七、八歲的年紀,本就應該意氣風發,昂首挺胸,耀眼熱烈。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA2RAwaI4hqq
104Please respect copyright.PENANArQUKxjGGjb
向菱卻是在此時變得心不在焉,默默退出了討論。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA3SiblkGC2r
104Please respect copyright.PENANABxkP1xhl9l
她一直以來,都有些迷惘。 104Please respect copyright.PENANALafzlcY1gm
104Please respect copyright.PENANAPSD1Cjuw6P
少女悄然離開剛才嬉鬧著的人群,沒有目標的閒晃,直到她莫名其妙地抵達了教室外稍遠偏僻的走廊。104Please respect copyright.PENANALzLZQEEqzI
104Please respect copyright.PENANAon9OPTIn8N
那裡是安靜而沒有人煙的地方。 楊宛問了她不少關於將來的問題,她卻經常回答不上來。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA6htQIHDLeK
104Please respect copyright.PENANAwwlAEsyKQs
「北渝市不錯啊,而且你已經是文學界的大人物了,感覺很有前途嘛。」104Please respect copyright.PENANAK6ObgZ4nuN
104Please respect copyright.PENANAIDH6DKmPmw
向菱不知道怎麼回應這種話。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAYnvwZaa6mJ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAyywy4Jr5T5
因為她當初會步入文學,只是為了躲避身後的經濟、心理壓力,她只是想遠離。104Please respect copyright.PENANAaqVO7mqMAi
104Please respect copyright.PENANA53q4UVxk7B
那時候,鄭娟因為向里的過世而開始出現異常行為,經濟困頓,她沒有專長又未達可以打工的年紀,於是只好拿出自己的興趣。104Please respect copyright.PENANAzbWVBD7LHq
104Please respect copyright.PENANA6jLWGPl6wM
結果最後越走越遠,她已經看不見家庭了。104Please respect copyright.PENANAjLSvsw5mG7
104Please respect copyright.PENANAGzAK1ALxzX
自那以後,她逐漸把寫故事當成了工作,而不是原先最純粹的興趣。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA0vidbhXYNm
104Please respect copyright.PENANAb2dLUgKRyf
思考大綱成為習慣,那麼提筆寫作就是例行公事。104Please respect copyright.PENANAhPJRcn3PSA
104Please respect copyright.PENANApF6XKmSaTH
她仍然喜歡文字,仍會從故事裡得到快樂,不過她好像成為了一個工作狂,也對這樣的現況感到迷惑。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAFEmwiA1oeY
104Please respect copyright.PENANAubagGDRphh
向菱覺得自己還挺矛盾的,遲遲想不通。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAdn7P7FPvmu
104Please respect copyright.PENANAVHw9V5fiKX
她想起前陣子,室友王曉認真問過她的話。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAsFa7HCYUzn
104Please respect copyright.PENANAOQAfqsImtQ
「你有想過未來嗎?」104Please respect copyright.PENANA60wO1a5aT1
104Please respect copyright.PENANAXsXdDYhQiz
——怎麼想?104Please respect copyright.PENANAntdy8bs7ai
104Please respect copyright.PENANA92njn1sMmB
要怎麼想,才是正確的? 104Please respect copyright.PENANAaLuxF4FpJ5
104Please respect copyright.PENANADaSVDTmU7p
她那時候沒有回應,只是勉強扯了扯唇角,以示附和。 104Please respect copyright.PENANALy6CMH4AMN
104Please respect copyright.PENANAYH8Zee4Dmn
大家都具有計畫,擁有目標,唯有她卻像是迷路的小孩子似的,不知所措的站在交叉路口。104Please respect copyright.PENANAmQrZ99xiF6
104Please respect copyright.PENANAIC0rT372Mz
向菱不知道有沒有人可以來拉她一把。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA2b7xU4prED
104Please respect copyright.PENANA8WJMtWFNBx
後來,大概又過了一段時間,文壇裡的朋友言恬,她說的話迫使少女開始直接面對另一件事。 104Please respect copyright.PENANATQsgKh7uF8
104Please respect copyright.PENANAOHHPh4nxGr
——她似乎喜歡上一個人了。104Please respect copyright.PENANAvGnE9knqrF
104Please respect copyright.PENANAgJWeYj1r3y
原來不知不覺間,她也抵達了,會因為學業和愛戀煩惱的年紀。104Please respect copyright.PENANAOn50wdRjAC
104Please respect copyright.PENANAMdku6rJyDv
那些事讓她愈來愈困惑,無法立即下決定但又無法乾脆割捨,陷入一種無止境的內耗裡。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAL7JCDWwjfh
104Please respect copyright.PENANAEaa5tf1mx9
這很不像向菱以往的風格,不乾脆,而且拖泥帶水。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAlfkiEm7SYE
104Please respect copyright.PENANAOfIUY7E0FP
她覺得越來越看不懂自己了。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAzwJh83qHAb
104Please respect copyright.PENANArQxvCi8hhm
_ 104Please respect copyright.PENANA1qukC7l3Li
104Please respect copyright.PENANAUNLPSlKVz9
這麼稱呼似乎有點矯情,只不過她喜歡的人……算了,還是稱呼全名吧,祁澈。104Please respect copyright.PENANAhrdowfK7xu
104Please respect copyright.PENANAqBTGHn5mPn
——她喜歡的人,祁澈,從中午那節午休之後就消失了、再也沒回教室了。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAe5kSp88Jfm
104Please respect copyright.PENANAQFybMatxG8
這種事不是第一次發生了,下午時向菱問過沈中奕,對方一臉莫名的丟給她一句——你第一天認識祁澈嗎?104Please respect copyright.PENANAePctjY18hi
104Please respect copyright.PENANA256LBPYj7V
…… 話雖如此,向菱還是有一點想找他說話。104Please respect copyright.PENANA26C6idNlG4
104Please respect copyright.PENANAOBCKvF6wPT
放學後,她打開手機,讓螢幕畫面在對話框裡停滯,一邊思忖著她應該說些什麼。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA1ZoHCibfdn
104Please respect copyright.PENANAmGrpb2Ip0Y
「祁澈。」 104Please respect copyright.PENANAkyyMUBOTAT
104Please respect copyright.PENANATXf9KXyucz
無意識的輸入了這個名字。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAvpcKT1u77J
104Please respect copyright.PENANARxTlYxp1Kr
彷彿肢體比她先記住,這個人的身影。104Please respect copyright.PENANAzP2nlebV5M
104Please respect copyright.PENANAK48zXTCpdL
奇怪了,她又不是失戀,只是和他說話的機會減少而已,自己在發什麼神經。104Please respect copyright.PENANA3SeTut6s6j
104Please respect copyright.PENANAa9Hb1F9Kb3
半個下午都過得魂不守舍,難道這個人是她過活必須的能量嗎?104Please respect copyright.PENANAhYqSm6vU8P
104Please respect copyright.PENANAoDhtynukDf
她腹誹了一會,手動刪掉輸入框的文字,重新輸入。 104Please respect copyright.PENANABG0YDgEF0L
104Please respect copyright.PENANAHqC46SL4Ce
——「在嗎?」不對。104Please respect copyright.PENANAMHaGiURqaS
104Please respect copyright.PENANABuriRk72bh
意圖太明顯了。104Please respect copyright.PENANAMG711Lin1y
104Please respect copyright.PENANAGM7fRAGr1b
——「你在幹麼?」也不對,這樣未免太故意了點。104Please respect copyright.PENANAIIAy7E3OgU
104Please respect copyright.PENANAWuLkJrpBmc
她猶豫著要發什麼訊息,最終還是沒發,盯著那個對話框框發怔。104Please respect copyright.PENANAk0ctcQbNXO
104Please respect copyright.PENANAcYoRAIdhiu
幾分鐘後,向菱挪動指尖,點按幾下手機,忽然突發奇想決定給他取個名稱備註。104Please respect copyright.PENANApq6e0LLUJo
104Please respect copyright.PENANAIMdQ5zThwc
指尖在空白的名稱框裡停頓了下。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAKkPQIvz3a7
104Please respect copyright.PENANAsqR994ipH8
然後,她沒什麼猶豫的從手機鍵盤裡戳出一個「?」,想表示神秘又行蹤不明的意味。104Please respect copyright.PENANAA2QPAUmDeZ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAkLGJr7Ret3
三秒鐘後又迅速刪掉,默默改成了別的內容。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAdpbDLlukAm
104Please respect copyright.PENANAL1wu2qWRg0
她怔了幾秒才按下確定按鈕,看著新備註,她突然覺得心裡樂得不行,唯一美中不足的是她有些羞恥。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAy8zKshZFgB
104Please respect copyright.PENANAGIE4DVcJpJ
新備註:「我才不喜歡他」。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA2PMndlmLZi
104Please respect copyright.PENANAZ6XvWB34xq
看著新取的備註,少女的唇角壓抑不住地往上翹。 104Please respect copyright.PENANALYjzSdWH5X
104Please respect copyright.PENANAH50oWSGE4X
她還在傻笑,一則新訊息突然從底部彈出,對方的訊息竟然主動來了。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAo1yMNpYsoA
104Please respect copyright.PENANAPhIA3ENu47
祁澈極少主動找她,所以向菱有點驚訝又有點愉悅,她點擊訊息閱讀。104Please respect copyright.PENANAaExjqqeLio
104Please respect copyright.PENANA9Nf1toLN9A
那封簡訊,簡單直接而且很有他的風格,只有一句「在嗎」,甚至沒有附上標點符號。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAcfm8mmLnWJ
104Please respect copyright.PENANACfKh6nAPxj
向菱本來打算秒回,但突然想起言恬的話,於是便退出聊天框,刻意延遲了幾分鐘才回覆。104Please respect copyright.PENANA3RR4YuthCJ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAJyKxWrJXAQ
……意義不明的舉動,大概只有這麼傻的人才幹得出來。104Please respect copyright.PENANAJUNVb5Ylux
104Please respect copyright.PENANADAhAYiqtNS
向菱:「在。」104Please respect copyright.PENANARAgd0AfKLL
104Please respect copyright.PENANAkz14jxogfy
突然有些好奇對方給她取什麼備註。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAf6xmf3NEOL
104Please respect copyright.PENANAn2N9yZOJVP
對面的訊息停頓了幾秒,像是在斟酌怎麼開始,然後才發送過來:「你在男生宿舍嗎。」104Please respect copyright.PENANAKjYNlu55J8
104Please respect copyright.PENANACuKY2T3Hxu
教室換座位之後,向菱還是經常找祁小波玩耍,熟悉之後變得像姊妹一般親暱。104Please respect copyright.PENANAHpTFfYriGG
104Please respect copyright.PENANAo6o6b9n0OH
——只是,她很少在宿舍碰到祁澈。104Please respect copyright.PENANAgYqEVfyYkb
104Please respect copyright.PENANACDmRtUrDsj
想想也對,他似乎極為頻繁的打工。記得某天她路過魚市,碰見他在那裡幫忙一個老人將新鮮的魚隻裝進大袋子。104Please respect copyright.PENANA3PMFWdpKyf
104Please respect copyright.PENANALOykSWyZdO
她知道他每天固定蹺掉的那節午休,都是去給祁小波帶飯的,但這不為其他人知道。104Please respect copyright.PENANASY5f2G4Qp3
104Please respect copyright.PENANAsNAPG8nfjc
向菱回覆:「祁小波感冒了啊,你早上說的,所以我今天沒過去。」104Please respect copyright.PENANA7FGNcljmwk
104Please respect copyright.PENANAUKs0UpD1aO
「怎麼了嗎?」她敲下這行,然後送出。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAcZHxPXvH4s
104Please respect copyright.PENANAl3WLcztkpQ
訊息傳送到網路彼端,很快已讀,接著對方的文字沒幾秒又傳過來,「明天也別去那裡。」104Please respect copyright.PENANArTEnnINW0g
104Please respect copyright.PENANAhBfNngfpL4
——向菱不懂他的意思。 104Please respect copyright.PENANASOLh9oyFww
104Please respect copyright.PENANAMscbsh8qPR
她用一隻手指戳出單個符號:「?」104Please respect copyright.PENANAkyINmGBiLt
104Please respect copyright.PENANAigp7ZZamH2
這一次,祁澈的訊息許久沒有傳來回覆,久到她差點以為他網路掉線了。104Please respect copyright.PENANACsuchIiYTM
104Please respect copyright.PENANAxGdfEjkyoy
從以前到現在,還是第一次出現這種情況。104Please respect copyright.PENANAVTeS0o8a8L
104Please respect copyright.PENANArefHIl0MIJ
她常和祁小波玩,他沒阻止過。她經常去男生宿舍遛達,和小女孩一起亂翻他的東西,他也沒拒絕過。104Please respect copyright.PENANAT3SKuIbiSX
104Please respect copyright.PENANA7zSBxLByc9
向菱有點錯愕,心想這人的態度轉換得有些過快。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAHylQ31snlj
104Please respect copyright.PENANAfcjlwuA8mG
她故作玩笑的發送,「你是被盜號了?」 104Please respect copyright.PENANAJdjtIhoWvc
104Please respect copyright.PENANAt4s4B2QBue
「沒。」否認得倒還挺快。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAFf900a0j02
104Please respect copyright.PENANAWa31gkkGnE
「那是怎麼了?我和小波約好明天要去公園盪鞦韆的。」 104Please respect copyright.PENANAc9zwp3hHhv
104Please respect copyright.PENANAw0Wh05ToMp
「抱歉。」 104Please respect copyright.PENANAdBvOWhNsrv
104Please respect copyright.PENANAcncAdiEKNq
少女打字的手驀地僵住了。104Please respect copyright.PENANAWSXVayc3KB
104Please respect copyright.PENANACbfNz8IN70
其實她的第一反應是——這傢伙居然會道歉啊?真稀奇。104Please respect copyright.PENANAstROCiAN8r
104Please respect copyright.PENANAr46G5zQvkf
緊接著她的思緒是這樣運轉的:等一下,他真的在道歉嗎?靠,好像是認真的,不對,他幹麼道歉?104Please respect copyright.PENANA3sOYZLlwWF
104Please respect copyright.PENANAynlhgJXXqu
為什麼要和她說抱歉?104Please respect copyright.PENANARZdWdU3a6f
104Please respect copyright.PENANAJMRuaaYf5K
一瞬間,她的腦子像是過載了,運轉不過來,甚至倏地空白。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAbJqr7p9iOL
104Please respect copyright.PENANAR3Mlf3KvHn
這算什麼,變相拒絕還是撇清關係? 104Please respect copyright.PENANAiL92Smkzdx
104Please respect copyright.PENANAtIk41S7msF
她首先聯想到的是電視上的八點檔連續劇。104Please respect copyright.PENANADqmctCe4t3
104Please respect copyright.PENANALPUrQx8ILS
對不起我們不要再打擾彼此了、就這樣結束吧、再這樣下去也不會有結果……為什麼她滿腦子都是這種沒梗的俗濫台詞。104Please respect copyright.PENANA72d4Dcijov
104Please respect copyright.PENANAEo4EN6ioNi
突然就慌亂了起來。104Please respect copyright.PENANAmd5aUr4v4m
104Please respect copyright.PENANA4aZicyd6YV
但是喜歡一個人的心思,本來就是很敏感的,她知道自己反應不應該這麼大,因為一句抱歉。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAPtjsPLbGI1
104Please respect copyright.PENANA6AhV3q1m06
又或者因為失去了一種可能「巧遇」他的機會。104Please respect copyright.PENANAABtq0McCxZ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAijFrlxhxZx
少女開始胡思亂想,腦袋一團暴亂。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAznUJrdHFJs
104Please respect copyright.PENANAUxNcXIjW3B
難道他已經意識到她的喜歡,於是決定開始疏遠她了嗎? 104Please respect copyright.PENANAD7o7UcKFwQ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAWeo4QtnzYG
她陷入一種莫名的恐慌裡,像是憑空懸浮於半空中,踩不到地板,像是失重。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAQxdQu3fDGM
104Please respect copyright.PENANAttU82GIhvg
這種感覺,一點都不踏實。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAL85XYBpZyn
104Please respect copyright.PENANA788R9ACMIq
_104Please respect copyright.PENANAJpYQFoUlRm
104Please respect copyright.PENANAigQ5HRJcVX
窗外陰雨綿綿,烏雲潛伏在暗色裡,連消失都悄然無聲。104Please respect copyright.PENANA3n1kTNgqPp
104Please respect copyright.PENANAP2x5UgKcmJ
隔天是周休,但向菱絲毫開心不起來。104Please respect copyright.PENANAF7VkSomPvp
104Please respect copyright.PENANA2mkK4z4aj6
她一旦變得鬱悶,就經常直接倒頭就睡,因為現實讓她覺得很累,睡眠做夢反倒是最好的去處。104Please respect copyright.PENANAyAl8KvRUTh
104Please respect copyright.PENANAi0Iq5o4OkE
室友們見慣了她假日睡長覺的習慣,都見怪不怪,放輕了動靜,不驚擾到少女。104Please respect copyright.PENANAfvbx63BKtJ
104Please respect copyright.PENANAUrUADo1qwT
她睡得比平時更晚了一點。104Please respect copyright.PENANAjJthNL5VcS
104Please respect copyright.PENANAZvKp0G1mWi
下午起床時,她覺得胃臟空得發慌,腳步沉重虛浮,囫圇拆了幾包糖果餅乾了事。 104Please respect copyright.PENANAR4fKOOoZwJ
104Please respect copyright.PENANA0Si4XU0B2G
過了一小段時間,向菱才打起精神訂外賣。104Please respect copyright.PENANAnTzk9OVONg
104Please respect copyright.PENANAcR2iea58LO
簡單而隨便的向室友們打了招呼,她覺得自己的話音有氣無力。 104Please respect copyright.PENANA08kHo4PrXj
104Please respect copyright.PENANAOAtBif6hDm
半小時後,她坐在床上吃著外賣便當,一邊打開手機給言恬發訊息。104Please respect copyright.PENANAnQjsTZ6gQF