I'm a horrible person.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVhv1lGdCL
Anti-hero, my ass. If I was a person reading this, I'd think that anyone who'd support the writer of this diary would be crazy. Despicable.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCjjsiiEPJ
After all, I've ruined many lives. Broken up families. Hurt an unfathomable amount of people. There are even people that have taken their lives as a result of my actions.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBY5FgWe5IQ
But I don't feel anything for them.
It was fun at first, you know.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxoYKVnw2Gu
It's nerve-wracking. Exhilarating. The echoes of screaming. Distorted faces.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfuFfCVKlGv
Projecting the faces of people I know onto the victims.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuyZk4w1yn6
Seeing people beg for mercy. A power trip, you might call it.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDhlMDv6O4
Have you ever had someone at your complete mercy? With their body under your foot, telling you to spare them at any cost. They would do anything.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vx4FcB7BG
Feeling your fist connect with someone's gut. A crowd of people watching you, yet powerless to do anything.
It was my life. I would spend most, if not all of my spare time planning how I would be able to rise up the ranks. Get more media on me. My character.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmxUpOYP9gy
I can't help but grin when I overhear people talking about me in person.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLUrrjaoAP
When I read the comments under compilations of my appearances.
But it's tiring.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd49h0kKwdK
The constant hate. The fear of being watched. The fear of being discovered.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJgqVh2xfql
I don't usually say much, but when we're talking about something I'm passionate about, I won't stop.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hb7aGk5M9
Naturally, I'm grateful they put a curse on me so that I don't accidentally blabber confidential information about villains.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtuI1Edr8I
But as heroes and villains are common topics of discussion, it's easy for me to get carried away. And after that happens, the anxiety hits.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMECYEvhMmU
What if they figured out my identity? What if they realise how despicable I am?525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNPi5Q7TNS6
I can't talk to them again. It's too dangerous.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGb78u3IrBR
Call it an irrational fear, but I can't help it.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7YF4PdabC
Sometimes I wonder why they picked me when I knew what I was doing was wrong. Well, I guess it's better than those who flaunt their crimes.
And gradually, I numbed myself to humanity.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMdOFXswBx
Those aren't humans. They're disgusting lumps of meat. They don't have a will of their own. Look, how they're squirming beneath my feet, promising to disown their children in order to stay alive. How one leaps in front of the other to finally die and be remembered as a hero despite living a life that can only be described as trash beforehand.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lS2FKOpgY
If I hated humans before, I came to despise them with all my being.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKadNJiogH2
Hope for humanity? Don't be ridiculous. Heroes don't exist. They're just garbage, like you and me, parading as luxury goods, made to capitalise and give false hope.
I'm tired of all this. Of being reminded of how revolting humans are.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV2R01zah50
Of being lonely.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElyzH6Ci5G
Pathetic, right? Even though I think like this, I'm lonely. It's not something I'd like to admit. I'm always alone, so you'd think I'd be accustomed to it. And in most cases, I prefer to be alone. But I can't help but feel lonely sometimes.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCgklzKugs
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDPCTu1ohBs
So I take comfort in my own world.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGumubMttL
If the Organisation doesn't want me, then no one would want me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDhlO9AnF6
I joined hoping that I'd be of some help to society despite being a loser, only to lose what little faith I had left in the world.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrjrSvXdr0
Truly, I deserve to be called a villain in all aspects.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbQR1SU9Mv
I hope you're happy. I hope the heroes are happy. I hope the higher-ups are happy.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZH0VBerdd
Or maybe I hope that the world ends tomorrow and we all get what we deserve.
The power of friendship, the happy life that's always being portrayed in mainstream media doesn't exist. It's all lies.
I tried, you know. I tried hard. I had perfect attendance in school. I did well in tests. In sports. But why? Why can't I bring myself to try hard for anything now? All that's left for me is to be the villain. With no one on my side my whole life.
You don't need to pity me. The families I've ruined sure don't.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBiVFn3c8e
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDkN8Ka2IFN
I can't keep doing this forever. I'll have my memories erased, and then what? I'll just keep being unwanted. I'll barely pass my studies. Get a mediocre job that I despise. A quiet life that made no impact. I was raised to be "special", but I'm not even special to one person.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ08hBkUXBPg
Why does a part of me keep screaming to be recognised?525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCB8P4OOkUj
If only I could have been more dedicated. If only I could work harder. If only I had a dream.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnuGydfeaSq
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3QEqknfpr
What would it be like as a hero? To have people not looking up to me from beneath my feet, but from respect and admiration? To have cheers whenever you walk by instead of when you're defeated and humiliated? But I can't even handle the expectations of my parents, much less the expectations of the whole public.
I can't even be a proper villain. A villain wouldn't have thoughts like these, right? They wouldn't even be writing something like this in the first place.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnaZ3QBjLi8
I can't be a normal human being. I can't be a hero nor a villain.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ81ifObxP4Z
I shouldn't even have been born.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡewnyO4pDGQ
The Organisation didn't even need to pick me; surely there are so many people out there who're better at being the villain than me.
Ah, well, whatever. It doesn't matter anyway.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53T5makeWz
....525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwG2nBbozg
[Deleted passage]525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNmG5cGplkX
