Legend of Linkle: Chibi Great Adventures 6
Riddle of the Master Sword
Zelda wandered the Lost Woods for what seemed like hours, when she finally reached the end, "So, this is where the legends are born." she mused.
Taking one step she felt a resounding, timeless echo of great significance. These were the very steps that Hero after Hero took, the land itself steeped in the same timeless power, even though there hadn't been millions of Heroes, even though there had always really been one, if she read the legends correctly. One spirit bound to fight evil.
"But it always seems the same...as though the evil is somehow connected to the blade within the Sacred Grove." Zelda stopped and looked down at her hand and slid her glove off. There she saw the strange birthmark she could never figure out, a dusky gold color that made her think it was tattooed to her at a young age, but she knew that wasn't it.
It was a curious mark, one she hid by drawing attention to the other hand or by wearing gloves, luckily she was a bit of an adventurer, so why she wore gloves wasn't something that crossed people's minds, they just accepted that they were part of the job.
Lately she'd been having nightmares, they were foggy at best, but always featured the Master Sword, which now stood before her, it too was steeped in history.
"How many wars have you seen, or villains that you've undone?" Zelda got an eerie feeling from it, as though it was the source of some unseen evil. Suddenly a loud humming echoed through the woods, and blonde girl with a green hood skipped through the woods, a compass dangling from her neck, "Are you studying the legends, too?"
"Huh? Me...I am a legend!" the girl proclaimed, "I'm the Hero reborn!"
"The Hero...then maybe you can tell me about this blade, how is it returned to this very same place time after time?" Zelda inquired.
"So...the next guy gets it?" the young woman scratched her head and crossed her arms, "Maybe because only whoever's the Hero can pull it out, and if it's already out you can't prove you're the Hero by pulling it out?"
"I thought as much, all the way out here, in a remote woods...it's the perfect setting for a fantasy come true." Zelda opened a book and flipped through some pages, "See, this is in Ancient Hylian...something about seals? It doesn't make sense, why would you pull out a sword if it's a seal, unless that's how you seal some great evil? But if that's true, then what if pulling it out has the reverse effect? What do you thin-"
Zelda shouted in alarm as the green garbed young woman tugged at the Master Sword's hilt, promptly letting go at the shout, "Don't worry, I'm not going to throw out my back!"
"That's good, too, but we don't know what this does yet!" Zelda exclaimed, holding the wing shaped hand guards of the sacred blade, "Okay, um, how to put this...what if it does more than just one thing, like—a wand, what if it was a sword, but it was also somehow a wand? Or a key? What if this...key goes to something, like a box, and say, that box has some sort of demon in it? Why here, in this place? Why always here, without fail?"
"Because...I don't know, it's not like they make a lot of swords and shields, in fact, do you know how hard it is to find a sword these days? Or a shield!" Linkle gestured to the Master Sword, "But somehow this thing goes through battles and never needs to be repaired, it's like magic...plus, it's the only thing that can slay that legendary demon in the fairy tales."
"From what I've read, there were heroes who've slain that monster without the Master Sword, other fairy tales that hold as much truth as the more well known ones."
"That's a good point, I guess, but I read that the Hero always wears green, that was after I got nicknamed 'Grasshopper', I didn't know there was some trend."
"I wasn't aware of this...is that a recent development?" Zelda read reports of red garbed heroes, so was mystified by this news.
"I don't know, I read about it once, and figured if my grandma and a storybook says it, then there's not a reason to sit around and wait for Canon to show up...or whatever that demon guy's name is."
"Hey ladies, what's up?" the two turned to find a man in green clothes, sword and shield strapped to his back, grinning with his arms crossed. Suddenly a bright blue fairy floated out from behind him, "Is what Link says. He also say 'Speak of the demon king' and also says 'That you have a lovely green-'"
"Back off!" the four turned to find an angry red headed girl charging though the woods, "Back, I say! I saw that unrealistically white toothed grin, I know that cliche! The 'I never brush my teeth, but they shine like a pearl wrapped in a diamond bathing in the sun' smile!"
"Gasp!" Link shouted, jumping back at the outburst, then pointing at the little blue fairy.
"He says," the blue fairy began, "'Savi told me'—hey, I did not! Don't believe him! Don't believe a word he says! Oh, 'also,' he says, 'this is my annoying fairy, Savi', hey! Did you just call me annoying?!"
"Everyone's been after you, Linkle, Zoras and Hylians alike! What about that girl, Rutilah? I saw how she grabbed your face!" Malron's eye twitched in her rage, "That face is mine to clutch! Mine!"
"Um, Malron, it's okay, she wasn't herself...uh, I don't think." Linkle gasped as Link walked up to the Master Sword, "Oh, hey, guy, you better not do that, you might unleash some kind of crazy some-"
"No, wait, Link," Zelda cried, "it's a trap!"
"-thing." Linkle finished her sentence as thunder ripped through the sky.
"Ah!" Link stomped his foot and everyone looked around to see what happened.
"He says 'this is bad!'; I agree." Savi announced, "First time for that...it's the end of the world for sure."
"Yes, it is the end!" Ganondorf laughed from behind them, "Finally, I'm out of that annoying sword...well, call me in seven years, one for each Sage, I've got a kingdom to subjugate!"
"No you won't, I'll stop you here! Spirit Shot!" Linkle pulled her crossbows off her boots and started shooting at Ganondorf, but Link had silently sprinted to Ganondorf, and with his Pegasus Boots, he managed to catch friendly fire in record time, "Hey, warn me when he runs out like that!"
"What do I look like, an announcer?!" the blue fairy screeched, "'Oh, and now Link's running down the left field, but Linkle made a home run—on his noggin', is that what you want me to say?!"
"Uh, no, just before he runs out, thanks." Linkle winced.
"Oh, my, she winked at me!" the blue fairy exclaimed, "Whatever shall I do?! Swoons."
"Ah, Linkle!" Malron cried, "Tell me-"
"She's lying, so many lies!" Zelda yelled, as she turned a fairy loose on Link's fallen form, instantly bringing him back, "Why are you always lying, Savi?!"
"Whew...so, you didn't wink at her." Malron sighed, relieved.
"Malron, I would never," Linkle promised, "Because...I well, I li-"
"Who wants sleepy mushroom stew?!" Talron hollered.
"I must say, after a hundred years of being stuck in the Sacred Realm, I find this all very entertaining." Ganondorf suddenly frowned, "I have but complaint...your dad ruins this, red headed farm girl."
"What, you mean the romance," Malron furrowed her brow, "or-"
"Everything." Ganondorf whispered, dangerously, "And so I shall kill him, so my ship can sail without impediments!"
"Wait, what?!" Linkle and Malron cried in unison.
"Even a villain can see truth...and I...I see that Linron must sail."
"No, about the whole killing her dad part!" Linkle corrected.
"Right, just because he gets in the way, it's no reason to hurt him!" Malron stepped forward, "I'll stop you myself if I have to!"
"Ha, I would never hurt him," Ganondorf smiled, gesturing for Talron to approach, "if I did, you two would just get upset."
"Dad, stay away from him, he's not someone you can trust!" Malron warned.
"Oh, you can trust me," Ganondorf grinned, "but really, this guy's a pain in the neck!"
Talron screamed as Ganondorf held him up by the neck.
"Why I ought to...Linkle, can I have an arrow?" Malron held out her hand and Linkle gave her an arrow and a rock, "You know me too well."
"Huh, is Linron stuff hap-" Ganondorf turned to fine Linkle staring pass him, but then Malron redefined "pain in the neck", and Ganondorf fell on the ground.
"Link says he wants to-" Savi raised her voice suddenly, "finish him!"
"Ugh!" Link's eyes widened in disbelief.
"I realize you didn't say anything yet, but you were thinking it awfully loud!" Savi defended.
Link nodded and turned the Master Sword underhanded, but before he stabbed Ganondorf through the heart as though he were a vampire, Linkle shot Ganondorf—who was trying to stand up—in the forehead, causing him to fade, "Ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh!"
Redi and and Zelda shared a glance, the former preparing to speak as Zelda blushed furiously, "H-he, um, he just lost speaking privileges."
"Huh, what did he say?" Linkle inquired.
"Can you not tell from the awkward air with which Zelda and regard what he just said that he said something that you shouldn't repeat in the temple or in front of elderly people?!" Savi demanded, "He swore, okay? Cursed!"
"Anyways, Link should put the Master Sword back now," Zelda advised, "besides, that hazy phantom of Ganondorf is standing on the pedestal, the Master Sword must have been holding him in place there! I feel like this was an educational experience for everyone."
"I'll say! Zelda just learned some new words!" Savi laughed, "Huh, what's that? Link says he can't draw the Master Sword, it must be that blue aura around him, skull monsters have that effect, I hear a good rainstorm will clear you up...too bad Ganondorf seemed to be the root of that downpour, though."
And so the awkward group of people who hardly knew each other waited until Link could put the Master Sword back where he found it, and Zelda—secretly a princess—wrote specific instructions on several large tablets scattered about the towns and temples and all around the Master Sword itself, the instructions included an explanation on why.
The first warning was that if they weren't cleaving darkness off someone or breaking a barrier keeping them out of an area, to not draw the Master Sword, this, of course, may be completely ignored in the future, or forgotten altogether, it's quite likely that the Hylians will immediately use the tablets as drape holders as soon as Princess Zelda is laid to rest.
Mini Author's Notes: I don't know where Savi came from, or where she's off to...it's a secret to everybody, myself included...but if you're going to have a fairy for a mute guy who breaks pots, leads Peatrices on, and terrorizes cuccos (R.I.P. Whoever Tried That), then give his fairy an ironic name, especially if she's not so savvy herself!
Syrup was angry. No one made her angry. She was so angry, she didn't know what she was going to do with herself, but she did know one thing, that roof was going to get fixed. It was such a simple thing Maple, Linkle, and Malron had forgotten, there were three of them, yet no one remembered to send for a carpenter, even Mutoh and Sons, a carpentry group stationed in Kakariko, would have done, and they weren't just second rate, they were second second rate.
"Let's see, what's a good curse?" Syrup flipped through the pages of her book, "Hex-a-Decimal a Day", where she complied all sorts of wondrous spells that were, by all counts, perfectly legal...she kept the illegal spells closer to her heart, in case she had to step in to protect her varied and balanced agendas.
Now for her evil-but-not-really plan to come into play.
Which happens just as Malron and Linkle are having a moment, instead of Talron showing up, as Linkle and Malron leaned forward and gaze into each other's eyes, Malron turned into a puppy and fell into the picnic basket. At that time, Maple crashed nearby.
"What else is going to fall out of the sky?!" Linkle cried, "The moon?! Oh well, at least Malron is basket sized, maybe I'll take her to a Great Fairy's Fountain."
"Or Syrup, she probably has a cure for Malron," suddenly Malron emerged from the basket, barking happily, "oh, but why would you want to cure her?"
"She is, cute, isn't she? B-but, she's probably tired of being a puppy right now, so...we should definitely cure her!" Linkle stood up and pulled her hood up, "To Syrup's-"
Linkle stared silently as Malron fell through the bottom of the basket, "Well, there goes that plan, Dot." Maple laughed, "I'll inform the witch of our situation."
"Y-yeah...and don't call me Dot! Why are you calling me that?" Linkle lifted Malron up and sighed, "I never know what to think of that junior witch."
After getting back to the village, Linkle ran into Maple, who had started flying back to where she found Linkle earlier.
"Hey, watch it!" Maple shouted, "Oh, Linkle, it's you! Syrup told me we had to go and grab some things from the woods!"
"Well, let's go get them, then!" Linkle cheered.
After returning and running back several different times, from the Snow Peak Summit to the Gerudo Desert, they finally had all the ingredients Syrup wanted.
"There, now you can change Mal back!" Linkle cheered.
"Yes, yes...ah, looks like you're insufferably gleeful even when you're running around doing quests...why?!" Syrup demanded.
"Because, it makes me feel like maybe I am the Hero, that one day I'll save Hyrule and...I don't know, I guess that's it." Linkle scratched behind Malron's ear, much the red puppy's delight.
"So...that's why...you do it for the warm and fuzzy feeling...I'll hurl after you leave." Syrup leaned over the counter while Linkle held her hand like a bowl for Malron to drink the antidote from.
"Yep, I just feel so encouraged when I complete a quest!" Linkle confirmed, "Oh, hey, where's Maple? She said she'd meet up with-"
Suddenly Maple fell through the roof and rolled into the door, and laughed dazedly, "I just need two seconds, I'll be fine, ha, ha, ha."
"O-okay, Maple's being weird!" Linkle pointed out, "What if she has a concussion?!"
"She's fine, she has a potion on hand just in case."
"Huh?" Malron leaned up and fell into the hero's shoulder, "That was a weird dream...you were in it."
"U-um, good weird?" Linkle asked, "Like how mint tea is good but weird?"
"Hmm, not quite." Malron groaned, holding her head.
"So, how was it bad?"
"It wasn't bad...just weird."
"O-oh...because I was in it?" Linkle was rather crestfallen, Malron was featured in many of Linkle's dreams, so she had hoped Malron did as well.
"Because Syrup was in it...you kept going back to her place to make me a potion, she cursed me or something and...Maple crashed into a door...and then a thousand Stalchildren started dancing...or is the plural Stalchilds?"
"That sounds like a pretty crazy dream, there, Mal." Linkle replied rubbing her back, "But Syrup didn't curse you, and Maple crashes all the time, and I'm pretty sure there are no Stal...things around."
"You carried me, Linkle."
"Of course I did, Mal...I'd carry you any day." Malron turned her head to smile at Linkle, then sat up. As expected by everyone but Maple, Talron kicked in the door, smashing the mage into the wall.
"I ordered pizza!" Talron screamed.
"Dad, can't you see we're...in the middle of...Syrup's place?" Malron turned a suspicious gaze to Syrup, "You would never curse me to be a dog, though, right?"
"Ha, ha, of course not!" Syrup lied, "Now you two go so I can throw up...before I get cavities."
The pair leaved with a dazed Maple following, leaving Syrup to her darkness.
"I don't know why she dreamed of monsters at the end...but that was hauntingly accurate for a dream...somehow she was at least kind of conscious the whole time." Syrup rubbed her hands together as she considered the next curse she should use.
Mini Author's Notes: The title sounded like a spell Syrup would cast.
Enthused Antics: Girls Reply to Ganondorf.
Malron didn't know why she was summoned, neither did Linkle or Rutilah or Dargun or Impa or Savi or Zelda or Maple, but they did know one thing, Ganondorf's smile was freaky.
"Welcome to 'Girls Reply to Ganondorf!'" Ganondorf yelled, "You're goal is to view one Ganon or Ganondorf, and name the first thought that comes to mind!"
The girls exchanged glances and "I don't know" and "seems suspicious; we should investigate" and then turned to Ganondorf, "Okay, let's do it!" Linkle shouted.
"Begin!" Ganondorf roared, and suddenly they were sitting at their own panels. Ganondorf was surrounded by a tornado and altered his form, "First, OoT Ganondorf! Zelda, what's on your mind?"
"Hide...hide, hide, hide, run, run, hide, so hide, much run." Zelda ducked behind the panel, but was somehow short enough that ducking was unnecessary for hiding, "Why am I short and so...s-scared?"
"Hey, you made the poor kid cry! I call foul!" Maple slammed her hand into the table and was about to yell about hexes and decimals, when a buzzer went off.
"Out of turn!" Ganondorf shouted. "Next, Impa! OoT Ganon!"
Impa watched as he transformed into a boar type monster, "First reaction is to seal you...second is that I'm hungry. Anyone got any bacon? I want bacon...is that weird?"
"Linkle!" Ganondorf morphed into himself, except he had hair curlers, "TP Ganondorf!"
"Um...excuse me, Princess?" Savi coughed, then sputtered, and fell to the floor, laughing, "I-I just want to say—ha, those hair curlers...is this a bad time, Lord Ganondorf? I was hear to fight you, but if you're trying to fix your exotic red hair, I can come back another time!"
"Out of order...also...you're off my friend list." Ganondorf replied gravelly, "Maple! Here's...TP Ganon!"
"Wow...I found Impa's bacon." Maple sighed, bored, "That'll make a lot of bacon."
"Now I want rock sirloin!" Dargun shouted, "Why am I even here, this is a girl's only game show!"
"Quite right, but you're a Goron." Ganondorf noted, "So...you were a loophole...also, out of turn...and out of character...but since you're technically not a girl or canon...next! Wind Waker Ganondorf!"
Dargun shrugged disinterestedly, "I want to know why you don't wrestle, I mean, you have two swords...why? Why two swords that long? Hey, two samurais called, they want their katanas back."
"Moving on! Rutilah!" Ganondorf shouted, "Wind Waker Ganon!"
"I can't say anything if you keep changing form." Rutilah groaned, "Besides, Zoras are gone by then."
"Malron!" Ganondorf turned to Malron, who was staring at him, entranced, an arrow in one hand, and a rock in the other, "AU Ganondorf!"
"I-I want to...oh, man...oh, man, oh man! O-oh...man," Malron shook as she bounced the rock in her hand, "that neck...I want to stab it so much...c-can I stab you? I-I want to stab you!"
"Uh, ha, ha, no, thanks, I like being not stabbed—h-hey, get away from me!" Ganondorf jumped back as Malron rushed at him, meanwhile Linkle twiddled her thumbs.
"You guys reckon she can get him?" Linkle crossed her arms, "He seems pretty fast."
"In the meantime," Maple began, walking over to Impa, "there's a bacon to be had...considering she's a puppy mutant, I'm surprised Malron isn't getting in on the bacon."
"More for us!" Impa replied with a smirk, "After this, pancetta!"
"And a salad with bacon sprinkled over it!" Maple cried.
"A Triforce of cholesterol." Savi groaned.
"You misunderstand, we're having small servings...we're being careful." Impa assured, "So it's a Triforce of bacon and hog harmony!"
"Why doesn't anyone want my opinion?" a green haired girl asked, walking in behind Aryll.
"Yeah, what's up with this?" Aryll demanded, "I'm kind of tired, it's been a long day, and then I see my sister on the most famous game show ever! I ran over here to find the party ended...oh, look..Malron's trying to stab Ganondorf, let's go play pin the arrow through Ganondorf with her!"
"Okay, anything to keep him from spreading chaos!" the girl replied, skipping close behind Aryll.
"Now I want to stab Ganondorf." Savi cried, "Too bad I'm so small."
"Don't worry, Savi, I'm sure you'll be able to aid Link in stabbing Ganondorf...where is he, anyways?"
"I don't know...Fi got assigned to him this time I think he's asleep or in jail...I swear, if it's not one thing, it's another!" Savi sighed, "I just hope he isn't smashing the pots in an angry person's home."
Meanwhile, in a Gerudo prison, Link was playing the ocarina in what his fellow prisoners liked to call, "The Gerudo Blues", about how they all got locked up without a hookshot. Unfortunately, nobody thought to climb the window or use Farore's Wind or reload their game...whatever that was.
Mini Author's Notes: So, one night a made this title...then the story...IDK what I was thinking, except that I needed another mini chapter and wanted to parody Malron stabbing and YouTube videos about reactions, and to start a series of Enthused Antics, but I will say this that I know to be true: The Unplanner's story "The Shipping Wars" was awesome and I like it a lot, and I read it recently, but I read it a little while back, so the idea of a bunch of girls competing was still fresh in mind, so uh, yeah...that's why a bunch of girls are...competing...Dargun was a very fun exception...I almost threw Ghirahim's fabulous self in there, too, though! Maybe in the next Enthused Antic?