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【凌家動物園 III 小強星人也求愛】爆炸頭不要來
By 喵芭渴死姬
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9-3. 四人行之有黃金！1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9i0zpj9Hto
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「嗚咿——」才跨出纜車塔台，體型單薄嬌小的喵喵仙貝就被強風吹得整個人往外飄移，幸好泰迪熊眼明手快將他拉回來，卻仍嚇得他緊巴住哥哥的腰抖抖哭道：「這、這、這、這風也太大啦！」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5dtIF0m8P
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「寶貝兒到哥這來。」泰迪熊輕拍胸口示意道，喵喵仙貝便立即變回小奶貓，快速鑽進哥哥的衣襟躲好，整個小貓身被包得嚴嚴實實，只露出一顆戴著雪帽的小貓頭，兩人這般互動自是又叮叮叮加了恩愛放閃度與萌物指數。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOg43LZG5Wp
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「真不愧是最高的六十九號峰啊！」個頭也矮小的肉盾，因矮人族先天骨質密度高而穩如八方地站在前方。他抬起反光眼鏡觀望呼嘯的風雪後，就轉頭朝塞倫伸出手，「小倫，哥牽你……」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGAol4okNT
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話未說完，一陣強風襲來吹開他的雪衣連身帽，將又大又綠的爆炸頭吹成刺蝟頭，活像是被打歪的綠髮仙道，緊接著，風雪隨之轉往肉盾直直打去，於是爆炸頭當場進化了。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BRikkATFw
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「喵哈哈哈哈！豬頭登的頭又更大惹喵！」喵喵仙貝用小肉球指著幾乎融入背景的巨型雪人頭，十分沒良心地噴淚狂笑。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuPCZ2HbVYf
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「噗哈！連大自然的仇恨都可以招嗎？」塞倫忍不住笑到肚痛捧腹。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzbNcGGarnV
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「呵。」竟連泰迪熊都微勾了嘴角，顯然十分滿意某豬頭中午講錯話的現世報。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCiXx5DtzRX
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唉，老天不懂欣賞哥的帥頭啊！肉盾的內心淌血了。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zmNuPIn9j
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一片笑聲中，只有育發出不同的意見，「唔，好像冰淇淋。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5UKmn2JNU2
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現場頓時化成無聲的囧。這吃貨能不能有一刻別想著吃啊？1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZMynQaOjMQ
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為免育真的提出吃冰淇淋的要求，塞倫連忙幫肉盾拍掉頭上的積雪。肉盾也趕緊掏出花頭巾，省得雪衣帽又被吹開。誰知，他才要往頭上套時，被凍僵的手指竟不小心一鬆，就讓花頭巾隨風飄去。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKJH7UCZg9
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「糟糕！」肉盾想追回花頭巾，卻見一道風雪又要往自己吹來，便只好慌張地套回雪衣帽，眼睜睜看著花巾消失在遠方。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNfxrdKwKm
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「算了，大不了我把帽子抓緊點。」肉盾一手抓著領口試圖包緊頭，卻也為接下來的路程造成些許不便。在第N隻野生怪被打得只剩幾格血後，肉盾忍不住先收回愛的小手，甩了甩痠極的右手，苦著臉抱怨：「只有一隻手真不方便啊！」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5lwvxUazcW
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「誰叫你笨笨讓頭巾飛走惹喵？」躲在哥哥胸前的喵喵仙貝，揮著小喵掌放出幾顆小火球後，就接著說：「或是尼要頂著雪人頭打群戰也可以喔喵。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7L8yx2Vs7
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「冰淇淋頭。」被勒令跟緊祭司的育再次小聲道。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr6EdiNS2Zw
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「……」四人決定假裝沒聽到。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3uqlHbaMOe
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「我想到了。」等火麒麟把怪滅了後，塞倫從包裡掏出針線和兩條棉繩，半跪在肉盾面前以便行事，「雖然只是初級裁縫，但縫個繩子還行，這樣你直接綁緊就好了。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR81UWJeyKU
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「喔，小倫好賢慧啊！」肉盾頓時感動得激動含淚道：「哥真是世上最幸福的男人了！」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAE9D9mJKI
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「叮！」伴著雪花飄下愛心雨的系統音也歡樂響起，「玩家塞倫貼心幫曖昧對象玩家肉盾阿弗羅縫衣，兩人感情升溫，獲得稱號《秀奸情的曖昧》，曖昧等級在加倍祝福下由7級升至9級，歡迎玩家再接再厲直奔奸夫淫夫的終點唷～♥」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWGMiuiStL
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「……」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡankzWbOcDb
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「哇啊！」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqM0uCIyx5
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「抱歉，不小心刺到了。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1LwBDeB6fa
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「沒關係，這是小倫對哥的愛，哥絕不會生氣的。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppNSK8t9pw
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「……」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsYseMqLKp
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「唉呀！」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUBrZXgD5Iy
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「抱歉，風雪太大看不清楚。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaR3AYcqFAb
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隊友間雖無法以技能攻擊彼此，卻能以純物理方式造成痛感而不失血。因此，目睹過程的喵喵仙貝與育，極有默契地憋笑對視一眼。他們敢作證發誓——塞倫絕非有意手滑刺到肉盾，而是刻・意・的！1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZSuzssbcj
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就在這一路打打鬧鬧下，他們終於來到艾瓦巨洞。一踏入洞穴，濃重硫磺味的熱氣就迎面撲來，不僅瞬間烘乾了身上的積雪，還烘得他們汗如雨下。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpBzhjt1Ru
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「Man！這溫差也太誇張了吧？」肉盾的爆炸頭本就較常人悶熱，此時他更難受得立刻脫下雪衣帽。其他人也紛紛換回平日裝備，恢復人形的喵喵仙貝還忍痛收起最愛的毛茸茸貓咪裝，穿上輕薄涼爽的法師短袍，露出白嫩四肢與纖細腰身。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsiS4gOjWrD
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「窩現在也想疵冰惹啦。」喵喵仙貝舔著有些乾燥的嘴唇，一旁的育連忙點頭附和。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZxHOUcDn7
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「寶貝兒乖，現在吃冰會更不舒服。」泰迪熊立刻拿出幾瓶有清涼降火功效的椰子汁，「先喝這舒緩一下。」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJxR6AVfu0Y
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「以這個熱度來看，裡面的怪應該是火屬性吧。」塞倫收回火麒麟，改召喚冰晶妖與可於五尺內釋放水粒子的水元素，頓時讓他們如吹冷氣般舒爽起來。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAwknMPfNHc
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待一切就緒後，他們才開始往裡走去。興許是這山上多是冰系怪，洞裡的溫度又太熱，因此他們一路順利無波地走到最底的石門前，而這自然也代表了門後的怪獸恐怕不是普通的Boss。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtX626WA3te
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「但這不是重複性任務嗎？這種任務很少要打高難度的Boss。」塞倫忽覺不太對勁地蹙眉。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRTJ6KKs7GO
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「對耶，或只是很多的菁英怪？」喵喵仙貝見育的神情凝重，便偏頭疑惑問：「小育哥者摸惹？」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKdcyPnLCB
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「嗯……有、有種奇怪的感覺。」育緊張地揪住泰迪熊的袖擺，顯然是在對方的不得不順手餵食下，把人家當成臨時奶爸兼保鏢了。喵喵仙貝注意到育的舉動，卻也只能無奈地嘟起嘴，看在這人失憶的份上暫時不計較。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡneBZ1QAB4E
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「放心，有哥在。」肉盾拍拍頂上的爆炸頭傻笑道：「反正兵來將打，水來土掩，沒問題的！」1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBHludKvYC
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「是『水來吐鹽』啦！」喵喵仙貝自認正確地糾正道。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFQfdcL266p
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「喔，是這樣啊。」肉盾抓抓臉似乎又混淆了。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF3azFuFmgW
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「呃……」見泰迪熊仍含笑似沒打算糾正，塞倫便把話吞回去暗嘆，有這樣縱容溺愛的哥哥，那孩子的中文會學得好才怪。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyhDjDv0b8
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肉盾率先小心推開石門，滿室璀璨的金幣山瞬間印入眼簾，差點閃瞎幾人的眼。他們眨了又眨眼，才終於見到一隻不知是狗還是虎的龐然大物正臥在金幣上發出如雷鼾聲，擱在臉邊的爪子比他們的頭都還巨大。喵喵仙貝張嘴似要說什麼，卻在泰迪熊的示意下頓住，於是他們紛紛低頭在隊伍頻道裡開會討論——1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTooRvPacO
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：牠在睡覺耶～OAO』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUiHhbXy5DH
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：不好打。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TtEvo7aMk
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：泰看一眼就知道啦？』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0oeYXDsygr
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：我哥是戰術師啊，可以看到怪和隊友的戰鬥數值。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZ1h9UbqG1
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戰術師？！這是《奧普斯》最高難度的特殊專業，除了需有極高的戳破盲腸度之外，還得通過多種任務考驗才能取得資格，據說全服沒幾個玩家拿到。塞倫驚訝地瞧了眼泰迪熊，真看不出那張面癱臉能識破這遊戲的什麼惡搞真相，但也難怪這人能從容應付暴走怪群的混戰了。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ibhNBn1KA
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：真不愧是泰啊！』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcyaBOd3ET5
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『【隊伍】塞倫：我看看寵物管家有沒有牠的資料。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRumUeJVU8b
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：好！』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpximVOnxB
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塞倫召喚出《寵物管家》往石室內的巨獸掃了下，資料面板上便顯示出掃描結果——1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMNmJBDaCGU
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『【寵物管家小百科】冥界一頭犬：Lv 90級Boss怪。綽號小一，是看守地獄惡鬼的冥獸之一，性格憨萌愛撒嬌，為地府閻王之子的寵物，嗜好是散步、追骨頭、溜主人。有兩個弟弟分別是冥界二頭犬、冥界三頭犬。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWD9zPyBOqJ
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又是地府寵物？塞倫與肉盾皆默了，這不會也是逃出來的吧，那什麼閻王兒子怎麼老是不拴好寵物啊？1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxzGFIbToW
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：這個可以當寵物？OAO』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxWT4ZL4Ti
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：會不會跟兔吉拉一樣，打傷會扣地府好感值？』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsElAmzVjN
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『【隊伍】塞倫：這樣還要打嗎？』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VNHFWopZk
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：要不我們偷溜進去收完東西就閃？』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQiiqZikWw
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：你留在門外等。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAciiz3yuw5
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：Boss不懂哥的帥頭啊～:'-( 』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9MksyH6w6a
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『【隊伍】NPC《育？》：我也在門外等。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9BcizFAbP
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四人不明所以地朝育望去，只見他的臉色比方才越加難看了，猜想大概是膽小所致，便隨了他。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oO27vWmvq
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：共需20顆，我們各拿6-7顆，一起行動別分太開。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZeBCQibRl
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：好～OwO』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ns0RQnaQS
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『【隊伍】塞倫：嗯。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnupxFO1j1M
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既然沒要戰鬥，塞倫便也沒收回寵物管家，僅留著吹冷氣用的冰晶妖。泰迪熊上了團體加速術以降低踏步的聲響後，三人便抬腳跨入室內。半秒後，他們滿臉黑線地一同退出石室。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0USsWuYKYt
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：？？？』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnaz9sB5pB
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：裡面太亮啦！真的被閃瞎啦啊啊啊啊啊啊！！QAQQQQQ』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC2LiXiLzgs
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『【隊伍】塞倫：除了金光就是金光，其他什麼都看不到。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgeI4oKvRW1
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：原來說要有心理準備是指這個嗎？QAQ』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCrpm9Eq8Wj
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：戴眼鏡的試試。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWot1vxhlyw
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：啊！黃金懂哥的帥眼鏡啊～』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEO2tDMaN4X
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打著只要不吵醒Boss就不會招仇恨的試驗心態，肉盾戰戰兢兢地往門內一站，又小小走了幾步路，發現一頭犬果真毫無動靜，便朝他們比了個大拇指，其他三人才放心地跟進室內，只有育依舊不安地表示要留在門外。1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUIzO21IPc
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：咦欸？現在好像不怎麼刺眼了耶OAO』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2yH2Gfz2Oq
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『【隊伍】塞倫：真的比剛才能看見東西了。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFWS3JXomx
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：該不會豬頭眼鏡又有什麼特殊效果吧？』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xAxZKVt0B
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：啊哈！哥的造型真多功能！』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxMoEH4l16
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：花椰菜光合作用。』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSfCWxufTWQ
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：泰……Q^Q』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtZEFJyIR21
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塞倫無語驚悚了，剛那張面癱臉是在開玩笑嗎？雖說不怎麼好笑，但這人難不成其實是冷面笑匠？這想法才起，就見喵喵仙貝乾笑地打出一句話——1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5GHbLDLYUx
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：我猜我哥大概要真相了OwO』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKlggKcJOEw
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不會吧？塞倫才想完下一秒，兩串鮮黃明亮的系統公告就跳入頻道——1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0sHu8rCJp
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『【隊伍】系統：叮！玩家泰迪熊餅乾不戳則已一戳驚人，一語道破本遊戲的高度機密之一——特殊裝備《爆炸頭》的隱藏屬性，獲得經驗值+10000，但由於玩家泰迪熊餅乾的戳破盲腸度已達最高值，故無法再升數值，請玩家再接再厲發展其他指數，勿再戳爆系統的盲腸啦～（By系統負責人）』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCrS4Cubcf
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『【隊伍】系統：叮！玩家肉盾阿弗羅的特殊裝備《爆炸頭》被識破玄機，升級為《超爆炸頭+1》，歡迎玩家再接再厲繼續挖掘各種神奇功能唷～（By系統負責人）』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7Uefg8K9B
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一戳就戳中高度機密真相？這下塞倫總算明白泰迪熊是如何達到戰術師門檻了，果真是惦惦吃三碗公！1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEz8Apptt4Q
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：噗！豬頭的爆炸頭好像又更大惹耶～OwO』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfWV9I0F2wm
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：沒辦法，哥的頭太帥，注定要如此多舛～ (╭￣3￣)╭♥』1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH7NCBlYYkk
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噗呵！望向撥著超Q翹瀏海自認帥氣的肉盾，塞倫忍不住失笑了，這爆炸豬頭還真是樂天的傢伙啊！1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb01qIigzoe
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ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭￣3￣)╭♥ σ ﾟ∀ ﾟ) ﾟ∀ﾟ)σ ლ（╹ε╹ლ）
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後記：
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泰勾都惦惦疵三碗公啦～AWA（誤會到哪去？＃1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvE6oHCM0G
下一篇打Boss囉！1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KN2VAm2wd
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旅行期間得腸胃炎真是苦得要人命qwq1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNr0uUPewVv
拉了一天又發燒一整晚，半夜還爬起來吐OTZ1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuUP5UBuy9s
可惡啊！最好肥肉也有變少！！1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99YPlPccKG
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★【凌家動物園系列】
1.花心豹吃兔計畫 — 付墨X凌小兔 （作品名：小兔不吃回頭草）1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyWUTkUT7jb
2.大貓小貓相親記 — 泰特斯X拉貝爾 （作品名：恃寵而傲嬌）1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt539UMVAC5
3.小強星人也求愛 — 艾登X席倫 （作品名：爆炸頭不要來）1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tkIVQKslR
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歡迎追蹤噗浪和FB粉絲頁>////<1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFDHvls4tcJ
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噗浪：http://www.plurk.com/sakuhyde1123Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuaacR8f7wr
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by 喵芭渴死姬 / 11.24.2015
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