->>>一發愛神箭,CP又一對。
【凌家動物園 III 小強星人也求愛】爆炸頭不要來
By 喵芭渴死姬
897Please respect copyright.PENANAynozV2MuM1
16-2. 小強也求愛897Please respect copyright.PENANAhBE8uaPV0a
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「嘎嘎嘎!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAFtsu8rJuWS
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「呱呱呱!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAerlf86zsdc
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一隻白晃晃的大肥鵝追著一隻鴨,在綠意盎然的翡翠森林裡啪搭跑過,後面一群嘰喳亂叫的小黃鴨,亦邁著小腳丫搖搖晃晃跟著,好似驚見媽媽被壞人抓走的小毛孩們。897Please respect copyright.PENANAK9vvA72o7e
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這意想不到的畫面,令兩人目瞪口呆地立在小橋出口張望,眼前的一草一木、一花一葉,乃至方才跑過的生物,都極似童話繪本裡圓潤可愛的Q版模樣,若非微型地圖顯示此乃月宮分殿副本,他們真會以為穿越到迪士尼世界了。897Please respect copyright.PENANAWUvKvJsmX9
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從古風仙境忽轉Q版童話,這前後格調也差太多了吧!感到無法適應的塞倫,不得不閉上眼揉著眉間暗嘆,真不愧是以惡整玩家為樂的奧普斯,要轉換視覺刺激也不給個緩衝時間,這不連那個聒噪鬼都說不出話來了?897Please respect copyright.PENANAf5iuxYZnOr
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豈知,肉盾的思維也跟奧普斯一樣難捉摸,只見他在一陣無語的驚呆後,就激動地握拳大吼:「嗚喔喔喔喔!這個空間設計的嫁接藝術實在太有哲理啦!從唯美浪漫到清新活潑,從飄渺幻境到平易生動,讓我體會到一個人生大道理——不論追求多麼崇高的夢想,最終仍要回到樸實,這正是所謂的反璞歸真啊!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAASvnTolXgu
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塞倫徹底傻了,「你在說笑吧?」897Please respect copyright.PENANApbuO8bQRJG
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「嗄?」沒聽懂意思的肉盾,揚起好大好燦爛的笑容看向他,「哥領悟這麼重要的道理,當然是笑著說話啊!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAjU9xKqxRaD
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「……」塞倫的腦袋當機好幾秒後,才終於擠出聲音吶吶道:「算……算了,繼續走吧。」897Please respect copyright.PENANADtwAwtkZSS
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根據聖誕老人的指示,他們要以落地的羽毛來找尋邱比特的房間,而以剛才那群小鴨追鵝、鵝追鴨的陣仗來看,大概也能推估那些羽毛是怎麼來的了。於是,他們沿著追逐方向走去,果真在森林小徑看到各色羽毛散落與獸禽爪印凌亂遍佈。897Please respect copyright.PENANA1jV8Zg46SD
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這裡發生過森林大戰嗎?兩人疑惑地互視一眼後,紛紛掏出武器進入備戰狀態,肉盾的觸角也似在偵測什麼地抖了抖。897Please respect copyright.PENANA0CbcZ4YkSG
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小心翼翼地走了一小段路,便遇上先前的鵝鴨大追逐,大白鵝終究跑得較快,一下就追上了鴨子,他們本以為是這鴨幹了什麼事惹怒鵝,豈知在一陣拍翅撲騰後,白鵝竟雙翅扒住鴨的屁屁騎上去做起前後運動,而總算趕上的黃色小鴨們則圍觀似地站成一圈呱呱低語。897Please respect copyright.PENANAnn8e68eYoF
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等……等一等!這是什麼狀況?897Please respect copyright.PENANAL8zyVMKsxs
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這下不止塞倫,連肉盾也愣了。不是他們不接受這種跨種族的禽禽交,而是除了這一對鵝鴨戀外,再稍往前一點的路上,還有好幾對羊鹿配、松鼠抱貓頭鷹、猴子撲倒孔雀、蛇滾鱷魚……897Please respect copyright.PENANArLuTsT2V7Y
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「我有種感覺,這個邱比特……」塞倫吞了個口水,有些看不下去地別過頭,「好像不簡單。」897Please respect copyright.PENANA7uQ9V1qZNc
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一聽心愛的美人這麼說,肉盾立馬拋開滿頭黑線,仰起小強觸角爆炸頭,展現了他自稱「倫夫」的風範,「老婆不怕,哥保護你!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAUtlGrv4Nka
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「就說不准這樣叫我!」塞倫立即怒巴那顆頭。897Please respect copyright.PENANAF6q7urV8YR
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於是,肉盾委屈哭哭地摸著頭,「喔,那老……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAbkOR7EN2BI
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「老公也不准!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAwF6m3E9p6z
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「嗚喔喔!小倫對哥叫老公了耶~」897Please respect copyright.PENANARm2n30nKxb
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「……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAetgepwpOJH
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他到底給自己挖了什麼坑啊?這下換塞倫委屈想哭了。
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其實,這個副本不需要打怪,只是得挑戰生態圈大交合的視覺極限吧?897Please respect copyright.PENANA6sLdLalOCf
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好不容易熬過各式跨種族亂象,一棟立在前方小丘上的磚瓦小屋總算印入眼簾,架在屋頂的粉色愛神箭顯眼得像怕別人看不到似的。正當他們要踏上小丘之際,愛神箭忽有感應般轉向他們,「咻」地射出一根散發金色光芒的箭。897Please respect copyright.PENANAyePfGqVgLq
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「小心!」以為是生人勿近的防範攻擊,肉盾連忙要拉著塞倫避開,誰知那箭並非對著他們,而是往他們頭頂上方飛去,又「啵」一聲似擊中什麼,一黑影便直直落在爆炸頭上。897Please respect copyright.PENANAqvg6BE4vX9
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「什麼東西啊?」肉盾說著就往頭上抓去。897Please respect copyright.PENANAUQp6RQPiC9
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「啊!等……」因身高差而看清爆炸頭現狀的塞倫,想阻止他卻沒能來得及。897Please respect copyright.PENANAjfyt262Qe1
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「怎麼?」肉盾不解瞧了眼欲言又止的塞倫,再望見手中掙扎的一團黑物,頓時愣地大叫:「Holy crap!這是什麼啊?」897Please respect copyright.PENANAhJjxyAMs7n
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「什麼什麼?沒禮貌的臭矮子!沒見過蝙蝠嗎?」897Please respect copyright.PENANAc2g2mGaPhy
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手中的東西居然開口了!不足掌心大小的黑圓球揮拍著不成比例的小翅膀,一對疑似眼珠的黑光點投出含怨怒視,隨著話語露出的尖牙又小又白,倒成了辨認正反面的唯一特徵。牠見肉盾依舊傻呼呼地望著自己,便又怒地炸毛大叫:「還不快放開我?醜八怪臭矮子!別妨礙我跟阿娜答約會!」897Please respect copyright.PENANA79kpAS0N2W
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「嗄?喔,抱、抱歉。」腦袋還沒轉過來的肉盾,直覺地放開蝙蝠任其啪啪啪飛走,也沒注意對方嘲弄了自己,半晌才又疑惑地問:「什麼阿娜答?」897Please respect copyright.PENANA7xz6TLV9IG
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話才說完,上方就傳來蝙蝠嬌滴滴的嗲聲:「阿娜答,人家飛回家途中,見你長得高眺苗條,皮膚又黑又亮,真是好個絕色美人兒,就忍不住多瞄幾眼,誰知命運就將我倆牽在一起了……啊,原來阿娜答也喜歡我嗎?嗯~人家好開薰唷!」897Please respect copyright.PENANATQl4jcmkiq
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「……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAHBGTMG2mAY
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察覺頭毛的騷動不斷,肉盾不可置信地指著自己的爆炸頭,「蝙……蝙蝠跟小強觸角?」897Please respect copyright.PENANA7Jr0y10xir
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「是啊。」塞倫掩著快憋不住的笑聲點頭道,待笑意稍緩後才解釋:「聽說被邱比特的箭射中,就會愛上第一眼看到的人……呃,生物,看來這森林的動物都中箭了吧。」897Please respect copyright.PENANA4NtQgtdis5
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其實,仔細想一想,邱比特就是個沒包尿布的小屁孩,以心智年齡來說,的確會喜歡童話世界多過美輪美奐的仙境,也難怪空間轉換會如此極端;而且,根據神話傳說,這個小愛神同時也是個愛搗蛋的小惡魔,在天庭因亂射箭而造成無數誰愛上誰、誰又愛上誰的惱人風波,再加上奧普斯的惡趣味,這童話森林的動物們自然就成了邱比特的玩具、愛神箭的犧牲品了。897Please respect copyright.PENANA1lThpJSHWE
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不過,說到生物……塞倫看了眼正逗弄小蝙蝠的小強觸角,想起昨晚喵喵仙貝在冷靜下來後幫忙做的鑑定——897Please respect copyright.PENANAqPcYFTp0Y9
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【飾品】《小強觸角》(已鑑定)897Please respect copyright.PENANAQ5SWCyKhK3
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等級:絕世大奇葩(橘色)897Please respect copyright.PENANAr5Yd6ECCop
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進化方式:♥♥897Please respect copyright.PENANAHSJaTNKGwx
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功用:防禦+40%、敏捷+40%、迴避+40%、生命力+50%。897Please respect copyright.PENANAVo1zz2JTFW
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特殊功能:897Please respect copyright.PENANAlPcTvRgG18
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與任兩套奇囧裝備搭配:有隨機機率原地復活。897Please respect copyright.PENANA0L7j9qvg2j
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與奇囧裝備之髮套搭配:非戰鬥狀態可抑止仇恨值,戰鬥狀態則反之,有隨機機率被隊友的技能打到。897Please respect copyright.PENANAqvblpY64PU
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注意:此乃以《超級賽亞小強》的靈魂精華打造的《特殊活體裝備》,請用愛意灌溉使其茁壯。897Please respect copyright.PENANAfOvjQ3F0vM
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本來他們還不解何謂《活體裝備》,如此看來,小強觸角也算是生物囉?那肉盾等同是收了個特殊寵物吧。塞倫失笑地望著小強觸角與小蝙蝠間的粉色愛心,「我大概能猜到你那觸角的進化方式了。」897Please respect copyright.PENANAakiuvo7GmZ
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「真的呀?老婆……我是說小倫好聰明啊!」肉盾緊急改了口,好奇追問:「是什麼?」897Please respect copyright.PENANAMbC4iVvQet
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「以後就知道了。」輕哼地收回那一瞪,塞倫挑眉賣了關子,就轉身朝小丘走去。不知所以然的肉盾,只好頂著一頭小愛侶趕緊跟上。897Please respect copyright.PENANA1KlB9a5jJs
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愛神箭依舊隨機往四方發射,但興許是偵測到來人已是情侶關係,沒再朝他們射箭。兩人一路順利爬上小丘頂,便見一隻大野狼嬌羞柔弱地倒在三隻小豬懷裡。對此,他們已見怪不怪了,僅默默快步走過這組攻受逆轉4P團,來到小屋門前敲了敲。897Please respect copyright.PENANAugTcePiewy
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一陣乒乒乓乓的碰撞聲後,屋內才傳來明顯是在裝病的虛弱童音,「誰啊?」897Please respect copyright.PENANArhOZVRh8Sw
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「你好啊,邱比特,我們是來探望你的玩家。」肉盾客氣地拉開嗓子應道,結果卻遭到拒絕。897Please respect copyright.PENANAuT2p8GgdRk
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「我不認識什麼玩家,媽咪說過不可以給陌生人開門。」897Please respect copyright.PENANAgQBsJasaP1
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怎麼維納斯也來了嗎?塞倫暗自吐槽了句,就接著說:「是聖誕老人讓我們來的。」897Please respect copyright.PENANAZ0Ua2EqQxj
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誰知邱比特更不爽了,「那個變態戀童老頭就更不用說啦!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAYNheVPWHu7
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兩人默了。原來聖誕是……不對,邱比特你怎麼知道的?該不是也被……897Please respect copyright.PENANAtM1JTpF00G
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為了讓童年回憶還保存一點點美好幻想,他們不敢再往下想像,決定先退到遠處商量對策。897Please respect copyright.PENANA2je3PBXOPb
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「按照童話定律,難不成得爬煙囪?」肉盾摸著下巴望向屋頂正飄煙的煙囪,立馬就搖頭了,「不對,按照童話定律,煙囪下面一定有鍋滾水在等……啊,聖誕老人好像也是爬煙囪的?」897Please respect copyright.PENANADcxq3vlwpb
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「別再提聖誕了。」塞倫欲哭無淚地掩面低嘆,要知道他小時就是靠童話讀物打發獨自看家的寂寞呀,被奧普斯這麼一搞,他情何以堪?無奈地瞥了眼爆炸頭上正打得火熱的愛侶,他便伸指戳了戳小蝙蝠,「這隻剛不是說要回家?」897Please respect copyright.PENANAnHM7X1XkDw
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「已經到啦!還有,人家已經有對象了,就算精靈你是個美人兒,也不可以隨便摸我!」小蝙蝠不滿地扭扭圓球身體想閃躲手指,卻被肉盾一把抓了下來,便怒地齜牙咧嘴道:「臭矮人你又想幹嘛?」897Please respect copyright.PENANAK5tVCIl5R8
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「這是阿蝠的家?」肉盾指著邱比特的屋子,隨口就給對方起了小名。897Please respect copyright.PENANAHF9rabHmxa
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果然,火爆小蝙蝠這下又炸了,「什麼阿蝠?小爺我這麼英俊瀟灑,怎麼會叫這種狗才會有的名字?死爆炸頭矮人沒文化沒教養!小心我叫我主人亂箭射爛你屁股!」897Please respect copyright.PENANARIwtp31Xky
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「那你叫什麼名字?」塞倫好奇問道。897Please respect copyright.PENANAoaQyckKf9l
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於是,小蝙蝠驕傲地挺起看不太出來的小胸膛,「小蝠,帥氣吧?」897Please respect copyright.PENANACQ76k47nix
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「……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAUsUblNUJBb
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「……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAnW27QS2T14
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兩個有差在哪裡嗎?兩人靜默一秒,才呵呵乾笑地點了頭,繼續回到正題。897Please respect copyright.PENANA0xCwaKO6AM
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「看來我們撿到邱比特的寵物了。」肉盾摸著下巴思忖道。897Please respect copyright.PENANA3skgRwYkFE
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「嗯。」塞倫盯著彎下身桿觸碰小蝠的小強觸角,若有所思道:「小強好像很喜歡牠。」897Please respect copyright.PENANAQwTYa35Bvw
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瞥及視野上方不斷飄出的愛心,肉盾推了下反光眼鏡,難得笑得有些腹黑宅,「嘿,哥有法子了!」
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ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭ ̄3 ̄)╭♥ σ ゚∀ ゚) ゚∀゚)σ ლ(╹ε╹ლ)
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「你這個笨蛋蝙蝠!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAD7urABxYVe
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在一番鼓誘後,小蝙蝠興高采烈地為他們引薦,卻讓聞聲衝來開門的邱比特氣炸了。897Please respect copyright.PENANAU8H9c03clR
897Please respect copyright.PENANAUl50RQz1tb
「不是說帶很重要的人來見我嗎?怎麼會帶顆花椰菜和……」裸飛金髮屁孩怒氣衝天地指著肉盾罵完,視線一落在塞倫的臉上時,語氣便忽然一轉,沖天炸毛恢復飄柔金燦,討好的諂笑嗲音中有疑似賣萌的跡象,「漂亮葛格,我頭暈~」897Please respect copyright.PENANAjXfKbtNmXt
897Please respect copyright.PENANAGfX5YkRGhp
邱比特說完,就眼睛一閉全身一軟地往塞倫撲去,背上的翅膀也不動了,擺明在跟人求抱。897Please respect copyright.PENANAq8Aqxyd3pG
897Please respect copyright.PENANAEygcSHDNvY
「呃,這個……」本就怕小孩的塞倫一驚,卻礙於對方是任務NPC,只好硬著頭皮接住這隻小豬哥後,就迅速塞進肉盾懷裡。897Please respect copyright.PENANAnXZXdXgQqk
897Please respect copyright.PENANARjRRbbOx2t
明顯有妻奴傾向的肉盾,則自動接收塞倫丟來的一切問題,更不禁得意地傻笑感慨了,啊!哥真有小倫的人夫風範!897Please respect copyright.PENANAqdW5ogGVze
897Please respect copyright.PENANAHWt3FKe1Nt
「我的確是帶很重要的人來見你啊,就是我的阿娜答強強。」小蝙蝠嬌羞地蹭著小強觸角,毫無出賣主人的羞恥感,更無視主人面子地直戳真相,「主人,你別見一個愛一個,這臭矮子有對象了,搶人家老公可是不好的喔。」897Please respect copyright.PENANAIiQqjQ6bx6
897Please respect copyright.PENANAUzqlkBuhL2
塞倫很想回嘴「誰是誰老公」,卻又怕中了系統陰招,便只好緊緊抿住嘴,以眼神發出無聲的抗議。897Please respect copyright.PENANA2CK2ppg3KN
897Please respect copyright.PENANA0v3LOfOADH
聞言,正拼命揉蹭的邱比特,這才發現自己吃錯豆腐了,便連忙拍拍小翅膀鑽出來,嫌棄地一腳踢開肉盾,「啊呸呸!我最討厭吃花椰菜了!」897Please respect copyright.PENANAxM6i8ZV29U
897Please respect copyright.PENANAyvvfH6Dpuz
「討厭花椰菜?啊,哥知道了!」沈浸思緒的肉盾沒意會過來,便一臉了然地揉著邱比特的頭髮,開始長篇大論了起來,「難怪你這孩子會頭暈啊,一定是太挑食啦!花椰菜可是很營養的綠色蔬菜喔,它含有豐富的胡蘿蔔素、維生素B1、維生素B2、維生素C、維生素A,特別是維生素C,不過這些都是水溶性很容易流失,所以煮的時候……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAQGhznKeDT0
897Please respect copyright.PENANAPNHLzHyYmb
囧!不要這麼認真地歪題啊!897Please respect copyright.PENANAZFe1BzHpi0
897Please respect copyright.PENANAqytTaC6rGJ
見這兩個刁蠻型NPC都當機似地呆住,塞倫真心黑線了。不知該說這豬頭太有辦法制服AI系統,還是太狀況外讓AI程式轉不過來?897Please respect copyright.PENANABXBUjNpPU8
897Please respect copyright.PENANASSxlA938GX
眼見兩分鐘過去了,肉盾竟一路扯到白、綠花椰菜的口感差別講個沒完,邱比特的腦袋上方甚至跳出重啟倒數計時,他只好戳了戳肉盾的肩膀送上甜甜一笑,才終於讓矮人版唐僧陷入癡迷傻笑再言語不能。897Please respect copyright.PENANA62x02QzKUo
897Please respect copyright.PENANAzlTYBOeeQN
呼,這傢伙的話嘮絕對跟阿全有得比,阿全囉唆歸囉唆,起碼還言之有物,這肉盾根本就天馬行空毫無章法,真要跟這種人在一起,他絕對要準備超隔音耳塞!897Please respect copyright.PENANAUUrc36vNpn
897Please respect copyright.PENANA9iS4MMxex2
「咳!」他咳了一聲清清嗓子,決定在肉盾又話嘮前搶先開口,「我們可以繼續任務了嗎?」897Please respect copyright.PENANAcl44b1EcHB
897Please respect copyright.PENANAILgCN8SyDX
重啟恢復運作的邱比特眨了眨眼,就苦著一張小臉飛回屋內,氣奄奄地往床上撲倒,唉聲嘆氣道:「唉……沒心情沒力氣沒辦法……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAGjSjfAzDtP
897Please respect copyright.PENANAsVi2stob5Z
「聽說你生病了,到底是什麼病啊?」肉盾不解問道。這小鬼一下活繃亂跳一下委靡不振,擺明跟感冒無關,肯定有其他原因。897Please respect copyright.PENANA1fUfEPXY22
897Please respect copyright.PENANABujtliB9mq
果然,邱比特立刻雙手摀住紅撲撲的小圓臉,嬌滴滴羞答答地一扭光溜溜小屁屁,嗲聲說:「相・思・病~」897Please respect copyright.PENANAHs7YpntwrC
897Please respect copyright.PENANAYtG7qp8pu1
「……」897Please respect copyright.PENANAIM8x1MD3Jw
897Please respect copyright.PENANAmX2tq732lA
「……」
897Please respect copyright.PENANAzIkQ5UGK9h
ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭ ̄3 ̄)╭♥ σ ゚∀ ゚) ゚∀゚)σ ლ(╹ε╹ლ)
897Please respect copyright.PENANABOAONvcmlT
後記:
897Please respect copyright.PENANA6MplavVrhB
想摸邱比特光滑小屁屁的舉手AWWWWA(#897Please respect copyright.PENANADDt9viiAZL
897Please respect copyright.PENANAla2hmee5wt
即將入隊的新NPC寵物出來囉!897Please respect copyright.PENANAoEkVzOqAdc
897Please respect copyright.PENANA73ydwYefc8
897Please respect copyright.PENANASb8jdDuOWi
【下篇預告】《手牽手釣魚去》:接到愛神任務,兩人一同出海遊玩,小倫要吃悶醋啦!字數約六千多字,估計禮拜天早上發。897Please respect copyright.PENANAczDRIMeAcj
897Please respect copyright.PENANAUWuW4ebhgC
897Please respect copyright.PENANAYFMlfyXqjc
★【凌家動物園系列】
1.花心豹吃兔計畫 — 付墨X凌小兔 (作品名:小兔不吃回頭草)897Please respect copyright.PENANAjqoQ0ba0kk
2.大貓小貓相親記 — 泰特斯X拉貝爾 (作品名:恃寵而傲嬌)897Please respect copyright.PENANAL16o5POmdM
3.小強星人也求愛 — 艾登X席倫 (作品名:爆炸頭不要來)897Please respect copyright.PENANATZl8llpHpy
897Please respect copyright.PENANAa8YYbZel6C
歡迎追蹤噗浪和FB粉絲頁>////<897Please respect copyright.PENANA9uACJEXiWb
897Please respect copyright.PENANA4nerboRACh
噗浪:http://www.plurk.com/sakuhyde897Please respect copyright.PENANA2ZYmPPdnNe
FB粉絲頁:https://www.facebook.com/meowbarksky897Please respect copyright.PENANAwcsohKDtNz
by 喵芭渴死姬 / 01.07.2015
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