A/N: This is part one of a two part piece of poetry. They're separate poems, but carry the same influence. I originally posted this on my journal entry piece here, but I've changed it into a letter and/or journal entry in verse. It's up to the reader to decide who "_______" is, but I had an idea in my mind when I wrote it. I'd love to hear other opinions though. As always, thanks for the patience, I've been incredibly busy with work and my lab assistant to my Advanced Creative Writing teacher. I've been majorly stressed out with a lot of work for class and trying to set up a connection between my work and LA stuff for a book signing. I'll also be doing a podcast with the author I'm building a connection with, so that should be interesting. As always, enjoy the piece, and please give feedback, it helps so much!72Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUXGbJ5WAkN
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Dear “____”copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡCG2MiR0LDp
Dear _____,copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbZbJ8MJlS
I expressed all of my hopes and dreams to you. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHmqgaX70f
As my confidant, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCWMpeDp0h
I trusted that you would handle them copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLsPXcYJVj
With care. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡB81Yyh8wo8
I was always starving copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8LIUaXyAX
For your validation and encouragement. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqJifGudqq
You knew how I hated it copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1zy07P8Ee
When someone told me copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrm29gc7PN
I wasn't good enough. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4EdOWsvrGV
Your words kept me breathing and creating. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡReWqMXyC5d
You left me torn into pieces, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmEcoOtBVi
Just like that poem I wrote for you. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0XCOT5jlM
Remember? copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡec0bDM8cpe
The one you said wasn't good enough? copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡqfA4sZTWBO
I write for myself, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0PcCD5HXr
But because you were so selfish, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcEuohhxuG
I tried to dedicate every page I wrote copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUVmZnmSjX
To what you wanted. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyXwKAaQi8
When you were satisfied copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLkWgJexgI
I felt whole. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡd2D9oCxKvR
I wanted--copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdpGKagU1y
no, needed--copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jkofB7t8n
your praise. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmqPvOs2zX
That smile, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡTibjYVufQv
Paired with telling me what to write and how copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTP8h4JpyS
Made me swallow every bit of resentment, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKedzJ21MC
Any bit of pain I felt for my suppressed imagination, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGUb0T6u8X
And I did it. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WRQ59VPyt
I did it for you. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡHmeVzNFBPs
In the end, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡdP881917E9
Even when I followed every direction I was pointed in, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5E6Wub6q0F
It was never enough. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡTH17DAVjcL
You wanted more meaning, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqBUyC3zKH
More eloquence, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡJPmPMR1Sh1
More emotion, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡybJzinaeGm
More, more, more, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsMBmldqVX
Always needing more. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ENvuzmvsE
I don't know how to measure up to those expectationscopyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡx0PhA8FKmm
Because I don't have the strengthcopyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6mOTXbfbCa
To keep my chin up when I struggle. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8KPVfjvCPX
I don't know how to keep writing copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnY6EyfjiC
For your sake copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpZujWGy8i
When you're never satisfied. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡJg2yciSHVH
No matter how hard I try, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡFc4DjJcy3u
Will this ever be enough? copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJU9de6TMe
Will I ever be enough?copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwve4HxWps
I can't find anything to reach for now that you leftcopyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡE4FIIYrUwu
And at some point copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHdkRryYll
I lost my drive to keep going copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxRJLWrjSQ
Toward what I want instead of you. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwVqfDpHyW
You knew having an impact on someone's life was my dream, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYDpivRRuc
And that writing was my way of doing that, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHJ4qv0ROT
But even when you knew about that fragile dream, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡIApD1FhqmQ
You told me it would never happen, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡmyO0Y7wPY0
So I believed you copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bIMf9hg16
And let myself fall into the clutches ofcopyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9JGznHeE8B
Grief and hatred copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡvu9jv7r1Xq
For myself, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20CKMRT48U
For you, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡahEQR1y6GG
For my future.copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡHcbQvGYXIW
I kept coming back to you copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKXZuJRoO0
For my daily fix, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡjYhYP90nfG
That feeling of being complete. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WSeNoVMmD
But you left me, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡIKnGJSpBhd
And I'm writing this, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡBAcTy12yoi
Trying to find something in me copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡfse8H2xCOU
Other than this emptiness. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxEDdovDZM
I've become numb to the world copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡRBn3uW4xvt
Because maybe if I'm numb enough copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡQLV5UC7sfV
Nothing will break through and hurt me copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡmut07GoDko
Like your absence does.copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡqbZOeuLi2g
You lulled me into a feeling of comfort and trust,copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡLS2HXXk5pz
Then screamed words of defeat into my ears. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1M4uMbbbPv
And those words worked into my braincopyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgGA4V5Pe7
And under my skin. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6008HY523v
They slid under my skin copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4hFz4RLgG
And lodged themselves under the surface like acid, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQWYr1TwQ7
Burning me deeper and deeper. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡDX7E6PCcRG
Your venom slowly killed all of my happiness and passion. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtLZ8k306k
That spark burned out copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnaDlBFe8w
And the one thing I could rely on, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLtupzj2Lb
My ability to express myself with a pen and paper, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡItEtsNOwNU
Was murdered by your verbal abuse. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuh18CDNRL
You destroyed my sanctuary, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡjdxNHXn1Z8
lit it up like a bonfire copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡdICRc5E0Br
And watched as my life's work turned to ash. copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡVsWct4P6SH
With every strike of your tongue, copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbVpZDmmEm
My soul was broken a little more copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡvR47JgcohO
Until there was nothing but dust left copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcgMpKQeRI
And I no longer cared or had any drive.copyright protection68ＰＥＮＡＮＡVJUQ9Ttwf8
A/N: That's the first half of a two part poem thing. Thank you so much for reading, lovelies! I've been a little slow updating things, so I'll hopefully post a little more before the school year gets too chaotic. I also have to apply to colleges (oh my goodness I'm going to be in college soon I'm not ready to adult) so that'll take up a good amount of time too.72Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgxd7H7Bdn
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