A/N: This is part one of a two part piece of poetry. They're separate poems, but carry the same influence. I originally posted this on my journal entry piece here, but I've changed it into a letter and/or journal entry in verse. It's up to the reader to decide who "_______" is, but I had an idea in my mind when I wrote it. I'd love to hear other opinions though. As always, thanks for the patience, I've been incredibly busy with work and my lab assistant to my Advanced Creative Writing teacher. I've been majorly stressed out with a lot of work for class and trying to set up a connection between my work and LA stuff for a book signing. I'll also be doing a podcast with the author I'm building a connection with, so that should be interesting. As always, enjoy the piece, and please give feedback, it helps so much!186Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36uNk9zuOf
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Dear “____”copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡblNl02kJy0
Dear _____,copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡKnjJsjrD9u
I expressed all of my hopes and dreams to you. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNwwecs4nF
As my confidant, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡUy0IU1KeKj
I trusted that you would handle them copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡevGxf9RGM0
With care. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡbkNHR2Uj7h
I was always starving copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ2Q0KK1vZM
For your validation and encouragement. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡOdhvLwFCds
You knew how I hated it copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡDoMr5Dt0XA
When someone told me copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXC8XnSZTR
I wasn't good enough. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡLI52eQzTtM
Your words kept me breathing and creating. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡl7a8ygM1gK
You left me torn into pieces, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyHfGECyEw
Just like that poem I wrote for you. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpfwstm1nQ
Remember? copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJXXRweExu
The one you said wasn't good enough? copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡoa35pJK2io
I write for myself, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIOOeghBhF
But because you were so selfish, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5oq3gWhUt
I tried to dedicate every page I wrote copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡMjEPo4y97Q
To what you wanted. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGzmuOCMqU
When you were satisfied copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡrSZQi26ek1
I felt whole. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6knVJruSy
I wanted--copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqfVNKJpw9
no, needed--copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡkY2jOkmVzG
your praise. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡWiNgFJZ6dS
That smile, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzjUu6Edwb
Paired with telling me what to write and how copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡnQ9paYKxUk
Made me swallow every bit of resentment, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡdQC07hJ7oX
Any bit of pain I felt for my suppressed imagination, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ3wjX1qBfW
And I did it. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡMDNW2YVNvP
I did it for you. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IFKJN2tUq
In the end, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUtYdqZD2f
Even when I followed every direction I was pointed in, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡAPSnMVlHIR
It was never enough. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRAcBjZDNT
You wanted more meaning, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eOxd1YcF0
More eloquence, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡsfQkDCfZjY
More emotion, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQPq2rK14y
More, more, more, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8MJF0LDdr
Always needing more. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFHvZl7ekr
I don't know how to measure up to those expectationscopyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbi2Cktnmy
Because I don't have the strengthcopyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡViHI1mIN0V
To keep my chin up when I struggle. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡeFAWaAhiPC
I don't know how to keep writing copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2N25qmzNJ
For your sake copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8J1Pr3caRd
When you're never satisfied. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ56SG22hjl6
No matter how hard I try, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡV59J7fauOY
Will this ever be enough? copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡdXHfM9jZja
Will I ever be enough?copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpg46j7nDs
I can't find anything to reach for now that you leftcopyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡuyxDiFSt9H
And at some point copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnF9DriWrC
I lost my drive to keep going copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6D2nI8HPwk
Toward what I want instead of you. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0TQEbvxEF
You knew having an impact on someone's life was my dream, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡf62UfFmyCN
And that writing was my way of doing that, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJrc79lOZS
But even when you knew about that fragile dream, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8hT18xdD5R
You told me it would never happen, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡikYled1AMD
So I believed you copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWmP9tZviY
And let myself fall into the clutches ofcopyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqggroOE2T
Grief and hatred copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkduGsIH3v
For myself, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡlrsIhBcg7u
For you, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡevUuMmTA1V
For my future.copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxgI2WaLEe
I kept coming back to you copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0GIIXkVds
For my daily fix, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsXkXKHQlI
That feeling of being complete. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPg2yjYI5D
But you left me, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡXmDD5mAqhO
And I'm writing this, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHgQ2dBK4W
Trying to find something in me copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPLJRk2Q38
Other than this emptiness. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0u8Dzue0M
I've become numb to the world copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2SujJxwkhA
Because maybe if I'm numb enough copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡhKq3tinw9q
Nothing will break through and hurt me copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDq9L4JgiJ
Like your absence does.copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lCyEm5aHm
You lulled me into a feeling of comfort and trust,copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡLY7b1Auo6D
Then screamed words of defeat into my ears. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLhfV3kEkC
And those words worked into my braincopyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡonX0WCm2N4
And under my skin. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡoy2wK46esd
They slid under my skin copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡShZ9xUdRyx
And lodged themselves under the surface like acid, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWVsXR4kTR
Burning me deeper and deeper. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡoiqrOavVpX
Your venom slowly killed all of my happiness and passion. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8if7rN2FEA
That spark burned out copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9x7BvZFPT
And the one thing I could rely on, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡxebXF08aVx
My ability to express myself with a pen and paper, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ84PochceWR
Was murdered by your verbal abuse. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡP90nhBSghI
You destroyed my sanctuary, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OXlMDmUOi
lit it up like a bonfire copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡrWmhlzyxNv
And watched as my life's work turned to ash. copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDEo0V0Tch
With every strike of your tongue, copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡCm6zISc4M1
My soul was broken a little more copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡmeXJvjj4R7
Until there was nothing but dust left copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfKeEL9FFm
And I no longer cared or had any drive.copyright protection182ＰＥＮＡＮＡXhI3RqW4vI
A/N: That's the first half of a two part poem thing. Thank you so much for reading, lovelies! I've been a little slow updating things, so I'll hopefully post a little more before the school year gets too chaotic. I also have to apply to colleges (oh my goodness I'm going to be in college soon I'm not ready to adult) so that'll take up a good amount of time too.186Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQLwzPoZLtv
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