A/N: This is part one of a two part piece of poetry. They're separate poems, but carry the same influence. I originally posted this on my journal entry piece here, but I've changed it into a letter and/or journal entry in verse. It's up to the reader to decide who "_______" is, but I had an idea in my mind when I wrote it. I'd love to hear other opinions though. As always, thanks for the patience, I've been incredibly busy with work and my lab assistant to my Advanced Creative Writing teacher. I've been majorly stressed out with a lot of work for class and trying to set up a connection between my work and LA stuff for a book signing. I'll also be doing a podcast with the author I'm building a connection with, so that should be interesting. As always, enjoy the piece, and please give feedback, it helps so much!50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDnjNRm7RJ
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Dear “____”copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡxVmOuF40Vl
Dear _____,copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7bjfA6ag8v
I expressed all of my hopes and dreams to you. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6zU6newqi
As my confidant, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3YeqNI5RJ0
I trusted that you would handle them copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQcv6NCh3K
With care. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCRlxXJMua
I was always starving copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4x8jXV12NK
For your validation and encouragement. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30BgvH38Z7
You knew how I hated it copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMKK7hIR3c
When someone told me copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18J9rH5sKT
I wasn't good enough. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡdNTO3ow7xv
Your words kept me breathing and creating. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqhYapgTgj
You left me torn into pieces, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5hsPrUwxng
Just like that poem I wrote for you. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡqA4jo8IVff
Remember? copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtFIsQ7IJo
The one you said wasn't good enough? copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1PGuE7oaFL
I write for myself, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5mvpLD7GS
But because you were so selfish, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7m3POTXwD
I tried to dedicate every page I wrote copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡlys1279riO
To what you wanted. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJUzfjkSr0
When you were satisfied copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡLO78RXWLUt
I felt whole. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡpf2Sg5Zqwh
I wanted--copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJ18jgrD9S
no, needed--copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡEVHM3yJ0kE
your praise. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡtKTwCaBCA7
That smile, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡUORVXacpOl
Paired with telling me what to write and how copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡhshZfkyYlS
Made me swallow every bit of resentment, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPCwlfHWSi
Any bit of pain I felt for my suppressed imagination, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4M7VI46UtU
And I did it. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLnxKCRiBc
I did it for you. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡbe1OKn3sjV
In the end, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡKnIRjqVqko
Even when I followed every direction I was pointed in, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡkBaI8Uk0cV
It was never enough. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡdn9fbUCfmW
You wanted more meaning, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡb6kTYDjT3E
More eloquence, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡiofs6omroz
More emotion, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡnCWwR8rtnO
More, more, more, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyVJsTnLNr
Always needing more. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5QGyX5Upt
I don't know how to measure up to those expectationscopyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡuM5rjXzKrX
Because I don't have the strengthcopyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRvuBXnYJa
To keep my chin up when I struggle. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡqaggQOeVJD
I don't know how to keep writing copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdpvEItetU
For your sake copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2LHwmFUlo
When you're never satisfied. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Lzl2q9hmT
No matter how hard I try, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡUM6khL3KZw
Will this ever be enough? copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡEbzqS6My17
Will I ever be enough?copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6TwrWWBdi
I can't find anything to reach for now that you leftcopyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡu84Bsmnv7n
And at some point copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2MyCcrIZZJ
I lost my drive to keep going copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7WQ1siXpTb
Toward what I want instead of you. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡIojN0M9oig
You knew having an impact on someone's life was my dream, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡLk3kXfLFfL
And that writing was my way of doing that, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmHfnaykzr
But even when you knew about that fragile dream, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡviQP5RBefT
You told me it would never happen, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0eylbO6R3
So I believed you copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhpzxNK58j
And let myself fall into the clutches ofcopyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡxECotHf5Wv
Grief and hatred copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡZrwd0RpPYh
For myself, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡSPzip659bd
For you, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡtJR57lMnqI
For my future.copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡSpapDbg30e
I kept coming back to you copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡlT4Ubt0hDc
For my daily fix, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6Wnb3IYr9
That feeling of being complete. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡHkzRJc30g3
But you left me, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBWjv8Nwqq
And I'm writing this, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡIVwEiII1G9
Trying to find something in me copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡbnuKfdXjdd
Other than this emptiness. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡmsPjMkszQS
I've become numb to the world copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zNwd6eW8V
Because maybe if I'm numb enough copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6jjA4zN1S1
Nothing will break through and hurt me copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡffu4zho1Qf
Like your absence does.copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQOHn2NCZW
You lulled me into a feeling of comfort and trust,copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5fRFkqtli
Then screamed words of defeat into my ears. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAyZF7g487
And those words worked into my braincopyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡj2Y8JmbxYa
And under my skin. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡtwfJnU3Nop
They slid under my skin copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TZESFL9JU
And lodged themselves under the surface like acid, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3WgbGCmdA
Burning me deeper and deeper. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡwH6MqtHuh5
Your venom slowly killed all of my happiness and passion. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡTnYT2RyO1h
That spark burned out copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡIilFywlbTy
And the one thing I could rely on, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqfRcGlTaC
My ability to express myself with a pen and paper, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡY30XW2OvQP
Was murdered by your verbal abuse. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡMz88eHEzSy
You destroyed my sanctuary, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8DYovb4R5e
lit it up like a bonfire copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3it0fwPKm
And watched as my life's work turned to ash. copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxVNF9ujJn
With every strike of your tongue, copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡSR1Rgw2kn7
My soul was broken a little more copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRbRlc6S1Q
Until there was nothing but dust left copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHoau3kZn3
And I no longer cared or had any drive.copyright protection46ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfVn6bU9wi
A/N: That's the first half of a two part poem thing. Thank you so much for reading, lovelies! I've been a little slow updating things, so I'll hopefully post a little more before the school year gets too chaotic. I also have to apply to colleges (oh my goodness I'm going to be in college soon I'm not ready to adult) so that'll take up a good amount of time too.50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbeZ7C5jweP
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