942Please respect copyright.PENANAPXb7CXObcm
942Please respect copyright.PENANATEHrF6Paix
緊接著韻味主播的報導是現場訪問,首先的受訪對象是在三樓被老酒保打敗的長髮肌肉白鬼,他正哭得像個女人一樣,走哂音地說出以下這番話:942Please respect copyright.PENANA0CFDTcEWgf
942Please respect copyright.PENANABJ9waohbSO
「那個中國人非常邪惡!他懂得用暗殺拳法……居然……一腳就將我的朋友踢死了……嗚嗚嗚嗚……(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANADY4at5Vw1X
942Please respect copyright.PENANAFaEm9gu2BW
這種反應實在讓我非常驚奇,肉體強壯到這個地步的男人,內心居然會如此脆弱,實在非常搞笑。大概是懷著過份的自信,所以承受不了失敗吧?942Please respect copyright.PENANAzDx3WDWrLF
942Please respect copyright.PENANAicZ2voX0nF
接著訪問,是白車送被我爆袋的肌肉白鬼入院的畫面,男聲以旁白解說道:942Please respect copyright.PENANA3v27zupCiN
942Please respect copyright.PENANAuWs8yNJTlk
「下體受傷的病人今晨被送到醫院時已經昏迷,經搶救後證實不治……(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAQrCkWjKneE
942Please respect copyright.PENANA2WQd9N2Gre
下?死撚左?我個心即刻寒一寒,踢一下個春袋就死鳩左?有無搞錯?我以前都踢過唔少人,但從來無踢死過人!942Please respect copyright.PENANAf3eGSg4unM
942Please respect copyright.PENANAZfSjHTUbXt
「病人的XXXXX與XXXXX受到不能修復的重創,相信下體當時應該受到一下非常強大的衝擊。(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAI3RG8hit69
942Please respect copyright.PENANAH71I1vpKhX
畫面轉到一個醫生,專業地解釋爆袋白鬼的死因。942Please respect copyright.PENANArbcOTW2ilr
942Please respect copyright.PENANAmpqexlfb7h
起初我非常懷疑爆袋白鬼是否真的死於爆袋……但見個醫生努力保持冷靜,但依然因為雄性本能難掩心中的恐懼,一路講一路標冷汗。我就知道爆袋白鬼個春袋應該真係爆得好徹底,所以話唔定我應該真係踢死左人。942Please respect copyright.PENANAGGRszJ4OEa
942Please respect copyright.PENANAXgMBPp4tFw
另一方面,我終於知道剛剛怪錯了長髮白鬼,他如此傷心的原因不是因為打輸了,原來我真係一腳踢死左佢個Friend。942Please respect copyright.PENANA48alFzbWH0
942Please respect copyright.PENANAUyOBL0mxdc
不過可能之前殺死首領的時候已經驚夠,所以而家話我聽原來殺多左個人,我心又面都無乜特別淆底的感覺。942Please respect copyright.PENANAVjWRqi68Si
942Please respect copyright.PENANA2F7O23YdSQ
畫面一轉,一名男性記者站在被警察封鎖的3K黨大屋前報導:942Please respect copyright.PENANASqpZdlDrIW
942Please respect copyright.PENANAkERq9kEMFS
「另一方面,於頂樓的死者頭部中槍,即時死亡,經確認後,死者是該3K黨的一名頭目。(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANA9cQmdwe9Mg
942Please respect copyright.PENANAcGar3WX5qp
然後記者又訪問了幾個人,首先是哭到不似人形的大富翁三人組其中一人:942Please respect copyright.PENANA49ztdz0zXJ
942Please respect copyright.PENANAJxgg8vaqLi
「首領對我們很好啊……嗚嗚嗚嗚……(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANA5fn8JjGCOE
942Please respect copyright.PENANApjLjFWG9O9
之後是一個我未見過的光頭白鬼,他眼有淚光在老酒保的酒吧裡,非常感性地說:942Please respect copyright.PENANA7IFvyRpqUB
942Please respect copyright.PENANApzkHebuuIL
「當時我們被一群黑人追打,是首領為我們解圍的,毫無疑問,他是個好人來的……(英語)」我還見到老酒保在他後要抹杯……942Please respect copyright.PENANACTs8VQz6GK
942Please respect copyright.PENANAbZ3MMNBBdR
我即時有個疑問,其實點解得我一個比人通緝,老酒保就無事!?真係點諗都唔明。可能因為佢無殺人?定係大家白人圍威喂,當無事發生?942Please respect copyright.PENANA9izYOb8qOn
942Please respect copyright.PENANABv60IRbElw
是鳩旦,唔撚理鳥。942Please respect copyright.PENANAirIVdCvgD5
942Please respect copyright.PENANA4zBM8Rc0W2
最後,是在太陽下變得非常純良的奶鏈白鬼,他用詭異的公雞聲,正經八本地說:942Please respect copyright.PENANAmWqtIrtDaz
942Please respect copyright.PENANAwOAbN4tvn2
「那個凶殘的中國人是駕駛一架好古怪的粉紅豹車來的。(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANADUL1xkjMR4
942Please respect copyright.PENANAdkKpSfA5x2
回到主播室,韻味主播作個總結:「警方相信今次事件應該是幫派仇殺,以下是疑犯的樣貌拼圖。(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANA8jtXOtuEkP
942Please respect copyright.PENANAL5XDxkK56I
一幅疑犯(我)的拼圖馬上就出現。942Please respect copyright.PENANAIsnt21Q2Se
942Please respect copyright.PENANAm1y8IFv52Z
但我第一個反應是:942Please respect copyright.PENANAsGDDjH8ifr
942Please respect copyright.PENANA2SWMKq0jcR
邊鳩個黎嫁?942Please respect copyright.PENANAutmwQ2HxnG
942Please respect copyright.PENANAtciSzaarmr
圖中人與我根本是兩個不同的人,條友似成吉思汗多過似我,成個額頭重要係光頭,然後好似清朝人咁有條辮,重要連眼鏡都無戴,相信依個通緝對我應該是完全沒有威脅。942Please respect copyright.PENANAyf1k7lxLvL
942Please respect copyright.PENANAK2ggM8cU9m
『我』的拼圖出了五秒後,主播就報導下一段新聞:「接下來,同樣是華人新聞,一群華人現於市中心遊行,爭取……(英語)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAs8U56FhRZJ
942Please respect copyright.PENANAdRY84A8LZJ
942Please respect copyright.PENANAej1dIGT2uL
既然有關我的新聞已經播完,我都無理由睇落去,於是繼續諗方法解決一個更重要的問題。942Please respect copyright.PENANA8e3ZdMtO6Q
942Please respect copyright.PENANAuH5Ox0i8sL
盧卡斯張單其實我有能力找到數既,不過我將具有這能力的白金信用卡以及提款卡遺留了在香港。因為不習慣帶太多東西遠行的關係,所以我現在身上就只有一張得50000蚊信用額既垃圾卡,以及幾百元美金。942Please respect copyright.PENANA9LvHphPnz5
942Please respect copyright.PENANA8DdNqdU4zO
五萬蚊港紙距離搞惦條數重有好遠路。心入面既魔鬼同我講,其實我可以一走了之,不過諗深一層,諗到之後盧卡斯會比人丟出街,就真係有少少唔忍心。942Please respect copyright.PENANAWsO9OM35By
942Please respect copyright.PENANAd0n0kZZK67
加上聽講佢屋企係拎綜緩過活,相信都無能力幫佢找左依條數,如果找唔到條數,醫院之後應該會搵佢追數。942Please respect copyright.PENANAVsLbqbE4eM
942Please respect copyright.PENANAr5N2CTXLNw
如果問我,醫院會用乜野方式去追返條數既話……我只諗到盧卡斯健康既內臟,將會同幾個唔同既有錢佬合體……雖然美國是法治社會,但法治唔到的地方依然是存在的。942Please respect copyright.PENANAeitmLqnVlk
942Please respect copyright.PENANAjmw1ma4JkK
算喇……我都係盡一盡長輩的責任,諗計幫佢搞惦條數佢。942Please respect copyright.PENANAu5yOlsQF41
942Please respect copyright.PENANAvresE6HfGZ
可能你會問,而家我身上得咁少錢,想幫都幫唔到嫁?不過我要話你知,依個世界有樣野叫做「出外靠朋友」!942Please respect copyright.PENANA682g1u2qO2
942Please respect copyright.PENANA56njYeivwa
所以我現在立即致電一個人,請她幫我解決現在的問題,對她來說,這個小銀碼根本就不是錢。942Please respect copyright.PENANAroQfqwsg1U
942Please respect copyright.PENANARKdVTfoaIu
響了兩秒,終於有人聽電話,她不帶尾音地說:「Who.」一聽聲音我就知道是阿花本人,於是立即就開門見山地請求:942Please respect copyright.PENANAEu8QHu7xU0
942Please respect copyright.PENANABAGXOnmvUP
「阿花,是我,有點事想找你幫個忙。(普通話)」我特登用了普通話,首先我們上次溝通是用普通話,無疑這已經成了慣例。942Please respect copyright.PENANA8wSWdePwhQ
942Please respect copyright.PENANAndHh6F0qN5
再者,有求於人都是不要太自我,太有骨氣,帶有過多原則比較好,所以這一刻,為了使她順耳一點,我為救盧卡斯放棄了自己的母語。942Please respect copyright.PENANA4YX0h34uQx
942Please respect copyright.PENANALTCX3uSKTe
她沒有問我是誰,相信在芝加哥會同佢講普通話既人唔多,加上我把聲其實好鳩易認,唔講你唔知,我歌喉重非常之好。942Please respect copyright.PENANAbIIGPgVZdN
942Please respect copyright.PENANA5MhK0tUB20
「你才剛駕我的車去殺完人,又想我幫你做什麼?(普通話)」她以皇帝那種高傲得黎,又帶點微微輕佻的語氣反問我。942Please respect copyright.PENANAGk4rEkEMyf
942Please respect copyright.PENANAzTl7LuSfTO
唔知點解我覺得她應該正躺在一張高級梳化,一邊讓女僕為自己修甲,一邊說出以上的話。942Please respect copyright.PENANAQU8B6fvGwK
942Please respect copyright.PENANA1rUCjxWzxR
但她居然會知我殺完人,這使我有點驚訝:「你怎麼會知道?(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANA7qGC1rfdIB
942Please respect copyright.PENANAV3rG64u2ok
「新聞才剛播過嘛,別說這個,我都有事要找你幫忙。(普通話)」她以很高的速度說出以上的話,同時命令我。942Please respect copyright.PENANAATyfmd843k
942Please respect copyright.PENANAPLYG3YacHn
這個緊急時期,我沒有拒絕的理由:「什麼事?(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAepQebCBPDA
942Please respect copyright.PENANAjl0rPLBvVG
她沒有回答,大概懶得向我解釋。她很清楚自己有能力秒殺我的要求,所以直接了當,以沒有疑問語氣地問……其實應該說,她又在命令我,這樣可能會貼切一點:942Please respect copyright.PENANA02v7reILfM
942Please respect copyright.PENANAbhZaha9r8z
「你有什麼麻煩。(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAleVrMoDVZF
942Please respect copyright.PENANAu72dZc4I4E
我很清楚遊戲規則,所以跳過無謂的開場白,誠實地說出對她來說連蚊咬都不如的要求:942Please respect copyright.PENANAkul6wN56Ku
942Please respect copyright.PENANAfpBEcvPxYb
「我要借點錢。(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAn3kSt1vBuC
942Please respect copyright.PENANAPaKzurKxUC
她立即就問:「多少?(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAgVutjzVVRf
942Please respect copyright.PENANA58eQgZN7Vs
這含有答允的意思,所以我馬上說出銀碼:「三萬,美金,我朋友住醫院了……所以……(普通話)」對於我所補上的原因,她完全沒有興趣知道,所以打斷順便正式答應道:942Please respect copyright.PENANAtY740FGCOW
942Please respect copyright.PENANAjxKpx8znJV
「好吧。(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAKQytt7l22z
942Please respect copyright.PENANAEkvVIFtMPK
為保形象,我必須表達自己以朋友的身份向她借這筆錢,留條線讓我以後有個理由,可以搵返依個『有錢』的『朋友』:942Please respect copyright.PENANAXseNRdYPrv
942Please respect copyright.PENANA1iAfLIcp0P
「我回香港再還給你。(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANA1QoMpBsC9s
942Please respect copyright.PENANALNc38kurDY
她即時拒絕,然後繼續命令我:「不用還了,你立即回來,明天幫我做一件事就可以了。(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAINlFw6lUNe
942Please respect copyright.PENANAN0cxe89fQF
其實我都預左唔洗還,而家佢自己話唔洗還就最好喇!咁就幫我慳返筆,真係多鳩謝哂。既然係咁,d錢愈早到愈好,我都唔想再繼續留係醫院:942Please respect copyright.PENANAyJjUikMpMp
942Please respect copyright.PENANAdGj9ZxHVYA
「但那些錢我現在要,你可以怎樣給我?(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAIzkFilWL8Y
942Please respect copyright.PENANAmSpQfR6Fmx
她非常踏實地,用有錢人的方式回答:942Please respect copyright.PENANAumRKzkVEy7
942Please respect copyright.PENANAX9Vip3tSA2
「等等有人會聯絡你,到時你給他醫院與你朋友的名字,就會有人幫你解決。另外,你最好一小時內給回來。(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAeKITOl9k0d
942Please respect copyright.PENANA4pijobTac7
趕在她收線前,我問最後一個問題:「你那架車要我駕回來嗎?(普通話)」942Please respect copyright.PENANAQaQpH9XduM
942Please respect copyright.PENANAJ29LlUJGcl
睇過新聞,我肯定D差佬靠張清朝成吉思汗既拼圖係無可能拉到我。不過佢地唔認得我一件事,佢地依然會認得停在樓下停車場的傻豹號。942Please respect copyright.PENANAM6D9HOK9OX
942Please respect copyright.PENANASgALCt5Wkg
當然我不會再回傻豹號,但我也不能讓車入面的東西變成證物,這對我非常不利,所以我必須要阿花幫我解決埋這個問題。942Please respect copyright.PENANA4HYYIodFss
942Please respect copyright.PENANApv81UnviNI
她爽快地回答:「不用,有人會處理。(普通話)」然後就收線。942Please respect copyright.PENANAqkYvahv0q5
942Please respect copyright.PENANAdNfdgJO4Rn
今次談判得到重大勝利!我讓她在不知不覺間幫我解決哂所有麻煩。雖然要我講普通話有少少唔開心,但諗返個成果,就知道一切都係值得既!942Please respect copyright.PENANAKPmnovaMhr
942Please respect copyright.PENANABRbFNFCslN
942Please respect copyright.PENANAD5F7H2JXEH
兩分鐘後,一通電話打來,是阿花派來的人,有錢人辦事速度真係好快,我講返醫院同盧卡斯個名,再叮囑佢解決傻豹號,他就忠實地向我保證一切都會妥當地解決,然後就非常有禮地收線。942Please respect copyright.PENANAWwYKVk6xHA
942Please respect copyright.PENANA97OIoCB4wQ
體驗到這種服務態度,我心入面不禁讚歎:有錢真係好西正啊!942Please respect copyright.PENANAZf1tFJxtOA
942Please respect copyright.PENANAOtyXwzAnD6
我光明正大地從後門離開醫院,打算走出馬路截架的士回去阿花的豪宅,怎知道走了兩個街口都沒有的士。942Please respect copyright.PENANALbf4TPD4Ee
942Please respect copyright.PENANA8qTQlXUmlK
去到第三個街口的時候,我見到一大群遊行示威的人群,本來我打算等人龍離開後就繼續搵的士。942Please respect copyright.PENANAKcsT8OjbRE
942Please respect copyright.PENANAXhLFHB5oSt
但有遊行的地方,就一定會有警察……所以兩秒鐘後,我發現自己已經被幾個差佬包圍……942Please respect copyright.PENANAyOvJE8mtpg
942Please respect copyright.PENANAkSJnKJ8Dxc
他們盯著我,看起來非常嚴肅,半秒後一個痴肥白鬼差佬上前,來到我面前兩米的距離。942Please respect copyright.PENANAqRiIqtIV0O
942Please respect copyright.PENANAbT7ILfTNlg
佢望住我,我望住佢後面碌電燈柱,心諗:唔鳩係咁樣都認得我啊!?但無事既!無事既!行走多年江湖既經驗話我知,佢無意思拉我。我身上又無槍,D槍我全部留哂係傻豹號,所以就算搜身都唔驚!942Please respect copyright.PENANAUu5vtaz3LH
942Please respect copyright.PENANANDfVNmWdL6
敵不動,我不動。942Please respect copyright.PENANAd0PKAQeOMI
942Please respect copyright.PENANAA8XKsXXqt9
敵一動,我都唔撚動!因為我根本就唔柒知可以點動!咁多個差佬圍鳩住我,你叫我動去邊撚度?定係打鳩佢?唔好玩野啦!佢地五個人有五支炮,我就得條撚,重打?你當我真係痴撚線嫁?942Please respect copyright.PENANAPGtNAHolOG
942Please respect copyright.PENANA0LcPdO1QQp
仆街!我成日係新聞見到美國D差佬好鐘意亂鳩咁開槍,而家見到佢地個個都好唔鋸咁望住我,我就好鳩淆底喇!942Please respect copyright.PENANA3v75RjGoMp
942Please respect copyright.PENANA2Og9rPFJRA
媽啊!耶穌佛祖真神,求下你地一定要打救我啊!!今次無事既話,我初一十五食齋啦,好唔好!?942Please respect copyright.PENANAllzHDQn9vW
942Please respect copyright.PENANATvw3cueup1
見到痴肥差佬依然非常凶狠地啤住我,我立即再加注:最多我兩個禮拜唔打飛機!942Please respect copyright.PENANA6pvHatahCo
942Please respect copyright.PENANAo7mwAxclG0
942Please respect copyright.PENANAOzJNuuRpI6
下一秒……他開口鳥……
942Please respect copyright.PENANAuyl9tuhLs3
942Please respect copyright.PENANAmI6YunTSmR