39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXu9plBB1V
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDxNMLKKnQ
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKUb7ZEa87
黃月英將火把留在外面，推開門，逕自走了進去。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6Pa1l4FCk
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs1v9jEH1hp
我也連忙跟上，並將門給關上。門裡是一個客廳模樣的地方，左右方都另有39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcFVyfU687o
兩個房間，但出入口沒有用門做區隔，自然也沒有上鎖。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ45wQX8Dnpx
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINRMkUMhvT
黃月英：「我左，你右。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCf8FblDDft
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHhRMEBbJpE
我點頭。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkKNiY6ttHb
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1C1GYTETl9
我到了右邊的房間，這裡是一個標準的辦公室，書桌、椅子、文房四寶，旁邊書架放置著紙本書籍、公文文件等。我暫且不管，繼續往另一個房間走過去，那裡放著一些箱子、竹卷公文，看起來比較像一個儲藏室。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtLffmshF4
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12VOERS0vw
這時雖然有紙張製造的技術，但還不是很純熟、而且造價高昂，所以會和竹卷交替使用。我隨意看了看，很顯然這個地方的東西比較不重要、而且我一點都不認為我能從這茫茫書海中找到我想找的東西。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyN9e1Yn8g
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7DKanFPWuK
我走回第一間房，開始翻翻找找，尤其是一些上鎖的書櫃都打開來好好檢查過。但怎麼找都是一些普通的魚雁、公文，並沒有特別之處。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4gF5LOElB
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJuSFW70Z0
魚雁不是不小心複製貼上、也不是打錯，不知道魚雁請上網搜尋。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRH5Hf9b59p
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4M1O9ewp2m
我和黃月英同時回到客廳處。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOYtmxlvvPf
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNsbXGA9k7x
我：「沒找到什麼特別的。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBVH3Hk1ES
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6LoBpNEu3
黃月英：「這地方應該是共用的，不可能會把東西放在這裡。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV383kBj9hY
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2O7UVH2D9a
我：「那就等鏡兒過來，再繼進行下一步吧。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxYfLemP0HB
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvFvYsVfg6
黃月英點頭。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZDlwmccSI
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡho3hhzJcOW
我們離開城樓房間，躲在城牆旁，注意著城樓底下的狀況。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusJhAsMnti
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpf8r82iXVC
我：「妳殺過人沒有？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfgGZKDGRy9
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHcbNAvX08Y
黃月英：「啊？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTBsrDlknp
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbZdAg6nmh
我再問一次：「妳殺過人沒有？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrC38IgmSPx
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUStmUXnvV
黃月英：「有──但死的都是該死的。為什麼這樣問？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKc7QlOyfbM
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5j5JEElYNa
我：「因為我沒有。上次在關羽那邊被襲擊，我明明該下手、但我才發現我根本下不了手。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEy7rIlbeRB
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOrQHYwaS4a
黃月英沉默了下，說：「我也會害怕。你沒什麼不對的，不用想太多。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KEKKTp8oH
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlY9oF1sPb
我：「我是會害怕，但不只是害怕。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZOOpyt0sE4
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXkO1zhki4
黃月英：「對我，就不用逞強了吧。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUUG4fI89f
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBRXx8gKUeN
我：「我真的不是。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4tLy5v6Jl
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe5mKqveYOx
黃月英：「那是為什麼？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVvvIA3Kj2
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqTi4CFy5Y
我：「每次我一跟別人起衝突，就會有一股異樣的衝動……好像我一旦動手，就會沒辦法停下來。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMj7pUHFiI
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8L4tSw0QnN
諸葛亮的身體，終究不是我自己的。還藏著什麼樣的秘密，我真的不清楚。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRdo2M613B4
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHX2FvszDH
黃月英倒是比我自己還信任自己：「你想太多了，你根本就是個濫好人──就是能面不改色用一些不正經的手段，我就沒辦法。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ335G1iDUYg
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8S60M5oFu
我：「因為我日後的每一個決定都會攸關數萬條人命。小小的詭計與數萬條人命相比，別說打暈他們，就算會有人因此而死，似乎都不算什麼。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzy96z8N1NL
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZynqpMcD7W
黃月英依然沉默。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcld81hhMdX
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZZtH9iDQm
我：「我不想讓任何人因為我而死，但這個世界註定要戰爭──已經註定了會有數十萬人死在我眼前，事情越是順利，就越是接近那樣的命運。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGO8Ef3KZb
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIVORWjR4F
「那是我真正害怕的事情。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lNtI6jXO9
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKlbjwLgJC
不等黃月英說話，我自己接著道：「抱歉，我好像真的想太多了。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2KeTwWjch
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeq7WmeOs6y
黃月英搖搖頭，卻是問。「你的世界很和平嗎？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe75OzEqK1G
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmM5SBit0s
我：「也不完全是。我只能說，我生活的地方、二十幾年的人生，都是平凡無奇的日子……」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5gnb8LBNAf
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ81mQeOA3zQ
黃月英突然握住我的手。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGAp1aH277
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGBv8yGorm
「我母親……事情你是知道了。兩年前，我初學有成，就一個人出門遊歷，途中碰巧遇上那時候的一個強盜。雖然老了一些，但我還是一眼就認出他。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVn2TOCTX6G
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNxpQ9PF3Hi
我：「然後你就殺了他？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSvZSiuMF3u
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMemnSu3wGD
黃月英：「是。但也不是。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cZ6Bzvfdv
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv04I2yga2X
我等著她自己說。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtKS7bkguGe
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGa5zUIRcSE
黃月英：「他不當盜賊了，在一個小地方蓋了房子、娶了妻子、生了孩子，早就忘了我母親的事，當然更不會知道我的存在。我的心情很複雜，沒有立刻發難，只是向他借宿了一個晚上。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNd7SBsBhM
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxHD3LukaT7
「但就在那晚，一群山賊襲擊了村莊，我想起以前的事，一怒之下動手殺了一些山賊。我救了他，我確實從山賊的刀下救了他一命，卻不是救了他們一家，只救了他一個。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ81cT37JXBb
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBf8lkCpkM
「我腦中一片混亂，不知道自己到底在想什麼。他的孩子被殺了、妻子就在他眼前被凌辱，我卻只是看著他跪著哭求我救他的妻兒，卻不知道該我到底該怎麼做……」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4I7B2F12pj
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjl9d1oE4iA
黃月英說到這裡，卻突然不說了。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOAOW4Gs4Z
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPdXz9Jjc5I
我忍不住問：「最後呢？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTdfFIBSWW
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBss5iekdDy
黃月英搖搖頭，表示她不想再說下去，只是問：「你會不會覺得我是個很壞的女人？」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7gVLfwAh9
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡde5B5iePyU
我：「不會。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHzsnlA2Ta
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFMflJxYNR
竟然不會。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuMU9b23hs2
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5xvQpOAD3
竟然完全不會。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtm3HyYFny8
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsj3XXzRByz
我突然想起了她跟我說的話。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36gCGZ4DGD
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlf1IBDdZGd
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJJmGs7CE1
都是因為你太沒用了，才害要我一直擔心，真的好怕你死在我面前我卻無能為力……39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZR8MlxPkv
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzCPpJJSdTM
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBoJGvjUTU
黃月英淡淡地說：「我才了解，這個亂世容不得任何人置身事外，我能做的只有保護好自己身邊的人。我不想救天下所有的人，但我那時就下定了決心，要讓自己有能力保護重要的人……」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMdWkdFnXT
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNWr0LVgw9
「我很高興，我現在有能力保護你。」黃月英竟是笑了。「不要只是讓我依賴你，你也多依賴我一點吧，我很樂意。」39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEl7GEt5iJO
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7UAViJ4MOd
我很想跟她多說一點，想了解她的事、讓她了解我的事。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpT9o5kSL3
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT1c3EHW4VV
真的很想。39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpnVtYt0lD
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiiChwHvlhj
39Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaCEIUQ61n
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