我和傾姐坐在沙發上,一同蓋在被子下。491Please respect copyright.PENANASZAD5GC3Xw
491Please respect copyright.PENANAScEImFotcx
拉上被子,右手拿出麥提莎,放進口裡。491Please respect copyright.PENANAnxeUoOFCLq
491Please respect copyright.PENANApblpLcJ8W8
「咬下——」明白了。491Please respect copyright.PENANAaIBVfd28OS
491Please respect copyright.PENANATkOb7L5QcK
目前,我知道了她和蔣少的關係。基本上,蔣家和家裡給予她的壓力,使她過著一個沒有自由的人生。491Please respect copyright.PENANAOJegCvWOik
491Please respect copyright.PENANA41o2FrGJql
難怪,她會向神許願,祈求能夠脫離現有的生活。491Please respect copyright.PENANAcYBIysi8fJ
491Please respect copyright.PENANATw3Osg7wAK
脫離現有的生活?慢著,那不正是我做過的,最誇張的一件事嗎?491Please respect copyright.PENANAcErP2WZ5cg
491Please respect copyright.PENANAFR62MInsLX
封閉自己的內心,流落孤島,徹底地脫離原本的生活。491Please respect copyright.PENANAns9Wri7apO
491Please respect copyright.PENANAoUwVZtvBpL
神是不是故意的?491Please respect copyright.PENANA9pDe6laiiM
491Please respect copyright.PENANAFuWPueLTET
竟然……安排這種測試給我。491Please respect copyright.PENANA2LUeCpHkWU
491Please respect copyright.PENANA7d00EP5VSl
我望望時鐘,時間奇怪了。491Please respect copyright.PENANAQkCWHYZIeW
491Please respect copyright.PENANA7mnASOVITW
牆上時鐘還沒到達兩點,顯示著一個奇怪的時間。491Please respect copyright.PENANAdNV3k4fgVA
491Please respect copyright.PENANAmPwFlUCfTV
「雖然你好想幫我,但其實我唔係一個值得幫嘅女仔嚟。」傾姐訴說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAvzPK4Yyb3h
491Please respect copyright.PENANAAk662ZWn46
「點解咁講?」我問,準備再取下一粒。491Please respect copyright.PENANA0wD4yN1fJ6
491Please respect copyright.PENANAFAhHBPesRS
「因為欺凌同學嘅人,唔止得蔣少,我都有份。」她自白。491Please respect copyright.PENANA8TQabMkyUC
491Please respect copyright.PENANAuQ4t0Pr2a8
「唔止有份,我仲縱容陳菲菲佢地去蝦其他人。」她繼續說,「就好似之前,要逼李可兒除底褲咁。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAFxWcf6U1gK
491Please respect copyright.PENANAzW9MH2PLA2
「我做過嘅壞事,一啲都唔少。」她說,「如果唔係,啲人都唔會咁驚我,我都唔會有傾姐今日嘅地位。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAKXwLVdmKjO
491Please respect copyright.PENANA0A9zyTnHAO
「有一次,中六蔣少啲friend想約女仔出去玩,希望我介紹幾個畀佢地,我都介紹咗。」她黯然說,「雖然……我明知會發生咩事。」491Please respect copyright.PENANA48oRJ9UZKL
491Please respect copyright.PENANAwyHfvjkQeQ
「唔好再講喇。」我說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAbmX6DnxDAo
491Please respect copyright.PENANA68lZdc3HNr
「如果你係想幫我嘅,至少,我想你知道真正嘅陸傾兒係一個咩人。」她認真地說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAXGECs9YGjk
491Please respect copyright.PENANAYD7aGY3rYw
然後我沒有再阻止她。491Please respect copyright.PENANAvVhFm68hQd
491Please respect copyright.PENANABonttwO5gv
讓她一直說著自己的壞,說著自己欺負了多少人,威脅了多少人,傷害過多少人。491Please respect copyright.PENANAxO4iUq8z9E
491Please respect copyright.PENANAmVQYfLM7KA
聽著,我聽到了熟悉的聲音。491Please respect copyright.PENANA5AigEra5PP
491Please respect copyright.PENANANzoWpvL5Lj
不是我也做過這些事,而是我也說過這些話,一些自責的話。491Please respect copyright.PENANAgvOK2eOGyz
491Please respect copyright.PENANASo9qMaru2P
透過用言語來責罰自己,讓自己好過一點。491Please respect copyright.PENANAmKRwcMP3G7
491Please respect copyright.PENANAuwpwHbPXiP
除此之外,在寂靜的夜裡,受著海風的吹襲,以虐待自己的方式來受罰;透過惡言惡語,破壞別人對自己的印象,讓別人討厭自己,也是懲罰自己的方式。491Please respect copyright.PENANApQTVi4oN3W
491Please respect copyright.PENANAKtYTe5tmLf
如今她正企圖破壞自己的形象,破壞她在我心中的印象。彷彿期望著我拒絕她,同時又期盼著我接受這樣的她。491Please respect copyright.PENANA0uVO5JNMh9
491Please respect copyright.PENANAVtPInamh5i
聽著,聽著,聽見了哽咽。491Please respect copyright.PENANAckR9FP91Jy
491Please respect copyright.PENANAiFCylJjzNB
「Sorry。」她垂下頭,「你聽完,覺得點……仲想唔想幫我?」491Please respect copyright.PENANAgSn8VTPJXT
491Please respect copyright.PENANAhVbuOvBiic
「定係……」她自我形象低落,幾乎抽泣,「你已經想即刻趕我走?」491Please respect copyright.PENANAdZ5DmB7psZ
491Please respect copyright.PENANAmZhTgL3hSQ
「做咩唔講嘢?」她問,終於望向我,「喂……」491Please respect copyright.PENANApq85iuyBFn
491Please respect copyright.PENANAs3gj86scYm
我也正在難過。491Please respect copyright.PENANA17lprRFOEU
491Please respect copyright.PENANACw5bN9qvAE
「啜泣……」我哭了,抹抹眼睛,「Sorry.。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAXWvpCHyxC5
491Please respect copyright.PENANA0temeIJrye
「你做咩喊?」傾姐問。491Please respect copyright.PENANAd5ixx9phGM
491Please respect copyright.PENANAQoyzOWc6V4
「因為我好擔心你。」我照直說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAtVF9q7SfZC
491Please respect copyright.PENANAOcGz6Zt56w
「點解?」她問。491Please respect copyright.PENANAmFaFwW9TXT
491Please respect copyright.PENANAmyisGxZ5Ko
怕你走上跟我一樣的路。491Please respect copyright.PENANAvhU4pJWtNj
491Please respect copyright.PENANAOg8SlV2VYz
「我驚你太過自責,之後會做傻事。」我說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAcEmNVWtv2D
491Please respect copyright.PENANA8FIWEa91b6
同是做壞事的人,同是不原諒自己的人。491Please respect copyright.PENANAVXcRmS2xOR
491Please respect copyright.PENANAv2IJPITjOU
但是困在孤島的人、封閉內心的人,有我一個就夠了。491Please respect copyright.PENANAhVuuskyViZ
491Please respect copyright.PENANANHuuxm3Aqr
「我亦都好感動,你肯講畀我知。」我說,收住了淚。491Please respect copyright.PENANA5aVlBS57AF
491Please respect copyright.PENANAO6kkKCODcm
只要說了出來,就不會鎖在心上了。491Please respect copyright.PENANApirXV3a6I2
491Please respect copyright.PENANA8V2zhC12eP
「其實我已經做緊傻事。」陸傾兒說,「我上網識男仔,或者可能……都期望緊會發生意外。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAdepi8LVlqq
491Please respect copyright.PENANAlogrQ4lZIZ
「如果我畀人非禮、姦咗,出咗醜聞,蔣少一家人可能就唔會再鍾意我,我就可以解脫……」她說,「從此唔再需要理屋企人嘅指示。」491Please respect copyright.PENANA3KWK0dr0HS
491Please respect copyright.PENANAsqe9oDobHF
這是……什麼爛方法?491Please respect copyright.PENANADqQ3aRsnaw
491Please respect copyright.PENANAGx25eMOnvJ
即使要折磨自己,也不是這樣的吧!491Please respect copyright.PENANAgZJ3ciZmTJ
491Please respect copyright.PENANA09Zebrk8Ot
在被子裡的手,握緊了拳。491Please respect copyright.PENANACx9ywN5Bn6
491Please respect copyright.PENANA9xsucekLNi
「哩個都係一個方法嚟嘅。」我漠然地說,「只係,有一個條件。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAoJameLG462
491Please respect copyright.PENANAOOBPca9ojj
「咩條件?」她問。491Please respect copyright.PENANAhjJswXLsRB
491Please respect copyright.PENANARAPKTYq2Ns
「搞你嗰個人,要係我。」我說,「除我之外嘅人,你諗都唔好諗。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAOWwabkVILP
491Please respect copyright.PENANAJytlQYbLkC
陸傾兒笑了,哈哈地笑了。491Please respect copyright.PENANA7MGd7UiQH1
491Please respect copyright.PENANApUjp5lKN5c
「點解?你同其他人有咩分別?點解要係你先得?」她笑著,笑容漸漸僵硬。491Please respect copyright.PENANAfsfvv4qzZV
491Please respect copyright.PENANAIVdTjPFCMb
「因為其他男人搞完你,就唔會理你,而我會繼續幫你。」我說,「雖然我未必可以長期係你身邊……」491Please respect copyright.PENANAnT0TIAIh0n
491Please respect copyright.PENANA36ZuSrrBnM
但即使我身在遠方,我都一樣會擔心著你,為你的人生而牽掛。491Please respect copyright.PENANA52UJU65wWz
491Please respect copyright.PENANAtj37DYkF1V
「你可以點幫我?」她問,「撇除哩個方法唔計,你有咩方法幫到我?」491Please respect copyright.PENANAmZ9wYS52lm
491Please respect copyright.PENANAgwpmcmfXnY
「我已經答咗你好多問題,你已經知道咗我好多嘢。」她繼續說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAPGC0GXoNs0
491Please respect copyright.PENANATuoXMstw8f
「孫正直,你可以點幫我?點幫陸傾兒?」她問,很想知道。491Please respect copyright.PENANAlolOPCIMIl
491Please respect copyright.PENANAmgoN5OKkRo
鬆開了麥提莎,我輕放在地上。491Please respect copyright.PENANAnCvWCLWXXh
491Please respect copyright.PENANA2XHfJx28Qp
「我唔係神,冇可能幫你解決所有問題。」我說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAVkgX5qshli
491Please respect copyright.PENANAWlqLJR9UBd
「咁你可以點幫我?」她追問。491Please respect copyright.PENANA7y6g0ZR1T8
491Please respect copyright.PENANAtDCntffFuC
她遇上的困境,不是耍一點小聰明就可以解決的。491Please respect copyright.PENANAkK9hBWpWio
491Please respect copyright.PENANAjU35G1nVmI
也不是叫她離家出走、自食其力、無視家人等,就可以過上美好的生活。491Please respect copyright.PENANAOeb4tbODZa
491Please respect copyright.PENANAGJm51QFGIo
「我都冇咩方法可以幫你。」我說,淚水情不自禁,「但係……」491Please respect copyright.PENANAGdc9PfmObm
491Please respect copyright.PENANAguNDHJrkMc
「當你凍嘅時候,我會幫你戴一條頸巾。當你想講嘢嘅時候,我會靜靜地咁聽。當你想喊嘅時候,我可以借個膊頭畀你。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAoTETLp9hpk
491Please respect copyright.PENANAEzzbcNhijq
「今晚嘅我,只係可以……今晚嘅我只可以……做到咁。」我抽泣地說,「對唔住。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAXLwN5wyMUk
491Please respect copyright.PENANA06Y2QKv3VR
說完,她聽完。491Please respect copyright.PENANA4VCbMK1ymH
491Please respect copyright.PENANA9QRBYOtXGf
「明白,我明白。」她說,「好多謝你今晚可以陪我,好多謝你,可以為我喊。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAar1hQwur7p
491Please respect copyright.PENANA0Sp5FyhY6o
「我成世女,都冇人為我喊過。」她誠懇地說,準備離開,「好多謝你,孫正直,我有少少感動。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAYCtKlkzmVz
491Please respect copyright.PENANAoeg8br8yET
等等,時間還沒到兩點,仍然是1點35分而已。491Please respect copyright.PENANAusiSZ7L2yF
491Please respect copyright.PENANA4GcAdvX7ZJ
「你係第一個為陸傾兒喊嘅人。」她看著我說,「你值得我,畀一個獎勵你。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAa3ghnnjTEN
491Please respect copyright.PENANAbFPcYrsS9I
被子從她身上落下,露出了她的頸巾、衣服,和手上的電池。491Please respect copyright.PENANAhCRLBxeuxN
491Please respect copyright.PENANA5MwAMAWMcT
「個鐘粒電,我係你去廁所嗰時拆咗。」她還給我,「唔好意思,因為哩個係唯一阻止時間流逝嘅方法。」491Please respect copyright.PENANANBZyiWuEUh
491Please respect copyright.PENANAsvYrZLj5yK
「但我依加要走喇。」她說,「實在太夜喇,聽朝仲要早起。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAS55OjoWX2t
491Please respect copyright.PENANANxRWEIPomJ
「陸傾兒……」我說。491Please respect copyright.PENANA7yxftjzbEC
491Please respect copyright.PENANAaF7ByjbGfO
「我畀你揀啦,一個獎勵,當最後一回合係我輸咗,而我揀大膽。」她睄一眼空酒瓶。491Please respect copyright.PENANAcclSmIp0xk
491Please respect copyright.PENANAag9D86S4jB
「揀咩都得?」我問。491Please respect copyright.PENANACj1eC8gaq2
491Please respect copyright.PENANAA7w2r0he4K
「你揀之前,我仲想講一樣嘢就係,你雪櫃根本有勁多啤酒,我搵到嘅開瓶器,就係係你雪櫃個蛋格到搵到。」她說,「但你唔想我飲,寧願呃我話冇酒。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAMQo4yfkdWg
491Please respect copyright.PENANAMNKDLZHnQS
「哩個世界點解會有你哩啲咁嘅人?」她泛淚,卻微笑。491Please respect copyright.PENANAtkFIAi3lgu
491Please respect copyright.PENANAAkzTtv2WSU
而我不懂回答。491Please respect copyright.PENANA59Zs2iSjLu
491Please respect copyright.PENANAgFgUhMAoCo
我是知道有酒的,昨天就知道了。我也知道時鐘被拆了電池,只是不說破而已。我猜她也知道我知道,才會在默契之下,延長了時間。491Please respect copyright.PENANAgep6pI0GWK
491Please respect copyright.PENANAGgtOQGwaG2
「陸傾兒,我揀……」我準備說。491Please respect copyright.PENANAWcfYZNmSeT
491Please respect copyright.PENANAprvQcf8U2V
「你會唔會想揀錫我一啖?」她先說,站在我的面前。491Please respect copyright.PENANAJpizHF9ylL
491Please respect copyright.PENANAARFF5CTG06
我展露微笑,問,「你覺得我敢唔敢?敢唔敢揀哩樣?同傾姐錫一啖。」491Please respect copyright.PENANAEyuHKYHyHB
491Please respect copyright.PENANA214ASHOZyv
「視乎你驚唔驚死。」她說。491Please respect copyright.PENANA87DLfKkOsd
491Please respect copyright.PENANARILdBKzaeE
「我驚死,我當然驚死。」我說,慢慢翻開被子。491Please respect copyright.PENANAUQMmmLx83W
491Please respect copyright.PENANAx796KxbB4u
「但唔係今晚。」我也選了大膽。491Please respect copyright.PENANAzF7BJd8wls
491Please respect copyright.PENANAlyejRsTs25
過後——491Please respect copyright.PENANAz87p8zmSwk
491Please respect copyright.PENANAkCgSWUkgLs
沙發上只留下一條米黃淺啡間條頸巾。491Please respect copyright.PENANAt6hbjAvMv7
491Please respect copyright.PENANAk19ihFHQeN
屁股坐下。491Please respect copyright.PENANA3H730EPSnC
491Please respect copyright.PENANAKI1nTcfZDR
還有開了一瓶啤酒的我。491Please respect copyright.PENANAja8KAtpNn9