暑假篇:釋懷515Please respect copyright.PENANAZpSm4xmyHU
515Please respect copyright.PENANA6aEknNeMzL
「你真喺Alvin啊?」515Please respect copyright.PENANAl7aSO7rOkR
那名女生仍然一臉難以置信地問著我。515Please respect copyright.PENANAke7zF8O1Ob
其實此刻,在我心一樣徘徊著同樣的問題「你真喺Ivy啊」。515Please respect copyright.PENANAqhymLN373E
但是對於記性好的我來說,當然知道她就是Ivy了。515Please respect copyright.PENANA093zvF0lgy
雖然她把過往的長髮修剪為及肩短髮,並開始佩帶起眼鏡。515Please respect copyright.PENANAdT01bIjl7B
然而她那張熟悉的臉孔,仍然存在於腦海之中。515Please respect copyright.PENANAFjZQzHd6RX
最糟糕的就是……我在一瞬間也回憶起,她哭泣著的容貌。515Please respect copyright.PENANAw4JOnoaWcl
亦都是多年前,我最後一次看見她的時候……515Please respect copyright.PENANAqd6P6qhhqA
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「我哋好耐無見啦!有無……有無三年啦?」515Please respect copyright.PENANANQS7Q1v0tr
Ivy在一陣驚訝過後,便隨即臉帶笑容說道。515Please respect copyright.PENANAyoBWjXJ7Iu
再見時是哭著,現在重遇卻是笑著,是多麼矛盾的事情……515Please respect copyright.PENANAiIteKkHCPq
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「正確嚟講應該喺四年啦。」我回應她。515Please respect copyright.PENANAKeeeyIgNao
而她在聽到我的更正後,也立即數著手指:「一、二、三、四……喺喎!原來已經四年囉,嘻嘻!」515Please respect copyright.PENANAXD8Jwa5h0G
看著她傻笑起來的樣子,我的心中卻逐漸產生起一種感覺。515Please respect copyright.PENANAaKXMEOGN1i
一種難以形容的內疚感。515Please respect copyright.PENANA1DHKoP8mNS
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而在她的一陣傻笑過後,她似乎也察覺到了我並沒有多說話。515Please respect copyright.PENANAs3klgAt0Ig
於是她便接著再說:「Alvin,你成個人成熟咗。」515Please respect copyright.PENANAoKlCBvj4Te
「喺……喺咩。」我稍為避開了她的目光說道。515Please respect copyright.PENANAtLIMng0wkR
隨即視線也落在她的長袖衣上。515Please respect copyright.PENANA82JzxSSxMZ
明明現在是夏天,外面三十多度,但她還是穿著長袖。515Please respect copyright.PENANARLxCL0tonP
是用來遮掩著手臂嗎?515Please respect copyright.PENANAGLNuwr0RNO
是用來遮掩著手臂上的傷痕嗎?515Please respect copyright.PENANAAQBdrtvzyH
是用來遮掩著手臂上因為我而弄出來的傷痕嗎?515Please respect copyright.PENANA5LcfLTNnPp
單是回想起昨晚Mandy所說的畫面,我便不禁倒抽了一口氣。515Please respect copyright.PENANAR4AmaBKN8W
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「Alvin,你介意緊以前嘅事啊?」515Please respect copyright.PENANAjxwxgiRxTe
Ivy很快也發現了我的目光落在她的衣袖上,於是隨即便把衣袖卷起。515Please respect copyright.PENANA8kDlCNpFWG
展露了手臂上的數條疤痕。515Please respect copyright.PENANAj2iXDAQc8N
這一瞬間,我的心涼了。515Please respect copyright.PENANAOuVkvkTCy7
原來這就是我當時的決定,而導致的後果了嗎……515Please respect copyright.PENANAA6CyMdLBRz
我沉默了數秒,接著也開口說:「對唔住。」515Please respect copyright.PENANARNCCb0xaRw
道歉,因為當時我傷害了她的心。515Please respect copyright.PENANA9gDgs8ryTt
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「哎呀!做咩道歉啦你?」Ivy立即愕然地說道。515Please respect copyright.PENANA4Yb77PbmLJ
我沒有回應她,只是繼續沉默著。515Please respect copyright.PENANAuSIgZ3decb
使得她隨即也皺眉頭起來,並思考了數秒後說:「睇嚟Alvin你真喺好介意以前嘅事……真喺好對唔住!」515Please respect copyright.PENANADIzknOeNIf
然而在她話後,她卻立即向我九十度鞠躬道歉起來。515Please respect copyright.PENANAaTTR5ZTsQ0
這次輪到我感到錯愕起來並立即說:「做……做咩突然道歉啦?!」515Please respect copyright.PENANA7HPxAu2kU2
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「因為當年我一時嘅衝動,搞到Alvin你原來一直都介懷於心!真喺好對唔住!」Ivy繼續面朝地板說著。515Please respect copyright.PENANASZDQ7rYsh5
使得我都開始有點不知所措起來,只能不斷揮動手臂,示意她快抬起頭來。515Please respect copyright.PENANAQR4EDODSDI
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於是Ivy也快速地把頭抬來,然後雙眼注視著我說:「如果喺一年前嘅我,我諗依家一定喊哂口。不過依家嘅我已經對一切都釋懷,所以希望Alvin都唔好因為當年嘅事而怪責自己!」515Please respect copyright.PENANAeZf6DdnHwz
「我自責緊……?」我疑惑地重複她最後一句話。515Please respect copyright.PENANA6mXc4EOF0K
而她只是隨即指向我並說:「我識少少心理學架!所以咪睇得出你自責緊!」515Please respect copyright.PENANA4VVkiox0TD
是嗎,原來我一直都在自責著……515Please respect copyright.PENANAeFz8Dk7zfo
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「其實講真啊,我都估唔到我哋會咁樣相遇翻,突然之間覺得所有嘢都好似喺琴日發生咁。」515Please respect copyright.PENANADKGTy4jqDN
「如果當時我唔拒……」當我打算開口說道的時候,Ivy卻再說:「唔可以。」515Please respect copyright.PENANAn91QxvP24g
「吓?咩唔可以?」我瞬間愣住。515Please respect copyright.PENANANh6WpZu5Ap
而她只是搖一搖頭,並說:「唔可以因為要迎合其他人,而強迫自己失去咗自我。」515Please respect copyright.PENANAigERrFwej1
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她的這句話如同子彈一樣,一下子打穿了我的大腦。515Please respect copyright.PENANA3ZIrcdfBkH
她說得沒有錯,我一直以來都是在扮演著一個只會迎合其他人的角色。515Please respect copyright.PENANAxTOOvZvJaR
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「以前我一直都會諗,如果Alvin你無拒絕我,究竟之後會點。」她說道。515Please respect copyright.PENANAYUv9lzE1zL
而我思考了一會後,便說:「我哋會一齊咗,跟住就唔會發生之後嘅事?」515Please respect copyright.PENANAEvVtwVJdoV
「喺,我哋喺會一齊,但喺一切都只喺因為你唔想hurt我,而強迫自己同我一齊,咁樣嘅話,我哋根本就唔會過得開心!」515Please respect copyright.PENANAFzOZi2VhPz
她說著的時候,語氣明顯變得有點激動起來。515Please respect copyright.PENANAOZO7Ehmn0U
但她仍然繼續說道:「咁所以,唔好再因為我嘅事而怪責自己啦!我依家過得好好,識咗一班好室友,佢哋仲教識咗我好多唔會嘅正向觀念。」515Please respect copyright.PENANA5t6ZNy2rSt
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而在她的一番言論後,我便合上嘴巴,並閉上雙眼,大腦開始思考起來。515Please respect copyright.PENANAPjWP6rTmk7
因為當初Ivy的事件,我變得開始只會迎合他人。515Please respect copyright.PENANABXjZoq1cFF
後來與Mandy交往後,我開始執著於承諾。515Please respect copyright.PENANAQXEu95oe4F
結識依玲及Venus後,我仍然只是一直在配合著她們對我的心意而行。515Please respect copyright.PENANAW8kl0150a4
一時是好朋友、一時是前度、一時是曖昧對象。515Please respect copyright.PENANA5LT37KKQHQ
到底我的真正想法是甚麼?515Please respect copyright.PENANAtIJmpI402C
而為什麼,我又會落得如此的地步呢……515Please respect copyright.PENANAGQhAz0lWck
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想著想著,我便不自覺地冷笑了一下。515Please respect copyright.PENANArl2cXurfVf
而Ivy也隨即說:「所以希望你唔好再自責啦。」515Please respect copyright.PENANAXZp3qrsJak
我慢慢地張開眼睛,然後看著她說:「多謝你,我諗我諗通咗啲嘢啦。」515Please respect copyright.PENANAhalgr7QbLs
其實一直迷失著的人,原來就是我自己。515Please respect copyright.PENANAZg7JQJqzAH
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「見翻你,可能喺種緣份,喺上天安排我哋再相遇翻,然後解開心結。」515Please respect copyright.PENANAOxVVu1vNu4
「心結?你唔喺話你釋懷咗啦咩?」我好奇問道。515Please respect copyright.PENANAaejxLFWS2R
但Ivy接著卻突然面紅耳赤起來,並說話變得有點口吃起來:「對你喺釋懷……但對另一個人唔喺……」515Please respect copyright.PENANAV1xjYtXILZ
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「喂!學生妹原來你喺到啊!」515Please respect copyright.PENANADHm0vAEpPY
此時,從我的後方傳來了一把男聲。515Please respect copyright.PENANAdVprDmA1lk
於是我便立刻扭頭過去查看,發現原來是剛剛那位受我邀請完成任務的Youtuber以及他的另外兩位朋友。515Please respect copyright.PENANANGKdCyY7FM
而從他剛才的對話推斷,他們應該是認識Ivy的……515Please respect copyright.PENANARgHksUwBea
莫非Ivy所說的室友就是他們嗎?!515Please respect copyright.PENANAUqgUyO7mJZ
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接下來,其中一名男生更走到我們的身旁時,並稍為打量了一下我。515Please respect copyright.PENANAwlmVI8zsrG
然後就一臉恍然地向Ivy說:「哦!原來就喺佢!」515Please respect copyright.PENANACqbBmNaE4o
「嗯?」我立刻擺出了一個疑惑樣子。515Please respect copyright.PENANA8VxYHq5qkt
甚麼原來就是我?515Please respect copyright.PENANAPVRQaAYBN6
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然而,那名男生並沒有理會我的反應,只是繼續與Ivy說:515Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6P6P1TnjB
「你要講嘅嘢喺咪講哂啦?」515Please respect copyright.PENANAsSYnyy9iYx
「講哂啦!」Ivy立即回應對方,並表情瞬間變得更害羞起來。515Please respect copyright.PENANAsC9EIsWukT
而我對於他們的對話,仍然感到萬分不解。515Please respect copyright.PENANAeq8MoWM1BX
但是那名Youtuber也隨即向我說:「我哋幫你哋做完任務啦!記得subscribe同like多啲我啊!」515Please respect copyright.PENANACjRRimQ7aZ
接著,那三名男生便與Ivy一同向我作了一個簡易的道別。515Please respect copyright.PENANAYxT2zXPrCT
然後就轉身從圖書館的另一個出口離開了。515Please respect copyright.PENANAErZC9mnZQn
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與此同時,也只留下了完全摸不清頭緒的我並自言自起來:515Please respect copyright.PENANAzsRHWUHCNW
「到底講緊咩啦……」515Please respect copyright.PENANARqDdLsD5xM
不過既然今天能重遇Ivy,並得知她至今還過得挺好的。515Please respect copyright.PENANAKiuwVrbBcv
我想……應該是時候要放過一下自己了。515Please respect copyright.PENANA2zb29YBib9
當年的內疚,應該都會逐漸消散了。515Please respect copyright.PENANA4f4XGOUMyC
這算是解決了我人生其中一個遺憾了吧?515Please respect copyright.PENANAxdnRAmPtC4
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但是,在解開了過往的困惑同時。515Please respect copyright.PENANAV6zpQWO4rM
也提醒了我,在未來,我將再次需要作出選擇。515Please respect copyright.PENANAPLL2xXrA07
而且還是三個那麼多……515Please respect copyright.PENANAwJNm9QKT96
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「只有釋懷,才能夠走更遠的路」515Please respect copyright.PENANAg69iCINcqp
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作者閒聊:連動篇總算告一段落了。在不久將來,Ivy還是會再次出現喔,不過那已經是第二個故事了~515Please respect copyright.PENANADoOSSItv7b