同學們面面相覷。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7HCCLAVg5
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「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkclG8fevk
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「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBIbKq637X
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG60VahbWLF

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0mIWhKiBMZ
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡocZDtb1WD7

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGoFxWdiZp
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「那改成老不羞好了。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmcUO96OYS2
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「更糟糕了啊！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD33ytuOTNB
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuuzb6SoH0

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2og3CZRTCq
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tQBsUu8QC

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdWd7fDZib
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzAHapKBx2

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRXSvla2V5
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjfWtwWEWm

「老師，它正在暖身。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82LWVYnakY
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「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1PvegMR0W
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi3n6Ll7TmX

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtz02WHi5AB
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5uezwMunP

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqiqbJfndk
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHe8On0iZ7S

「那我改姓三岐。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡygJCHznM8L
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「才不是這個意思！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKy61yYneeh
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「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmwRyXrDtb8
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB47hMzO8P3

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGOGyUxPhL
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtCYgUx6Vg

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3G1Jwmy914
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「元帥好弱。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgFTVCrPatw
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「你根本是想殺了我吧！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuO6SXHypAg
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgsJR1yqhd

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpGBcT9DXA
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmnXd2S1Tz

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNTl7Mu1IbV
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Y18PdgogN

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8ZHTpUBLk
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wTMWkUj5K
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「老師！別中計啊！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUMOGm8RypC
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHB32VMh6n

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2J6asQEMOb
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtg29LJ6Ed

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzW0r8JXlR
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    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡViL7PnguOD
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjGuKHzxdGO

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqOCISgB7E
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoxTJX65l9

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jlK7FjSNU
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpb7QnX7vcM

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIxvu0yXL1
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkidCGac5k

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNEp9k7Fgq
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「什──」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvp3LpNQQ6c
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「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyj6hr9dn5s
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2Jf4ty3d7

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2EEogJMFc
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtNKEW6Mnmx

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMYfXt1U3c
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKlZc8YTzf0

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXQcAbYeK4
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    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GHEYLcNUg
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUW6Dizmwv

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3wsnIs5JT
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf64NOp042O

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpomipHMrT9
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCU8xnRXhF9

    賴妍歪頭。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuNpRX1pCe
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「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEe1CcudeP
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB0eCHGenPe

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6uoaiB2ml
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9A1sKyLSxZ

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvK2U8W47s6
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPneisXl62

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOih8lAmwFB
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv8MgJjrRJl

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnaWXjpHD3
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc1spzz5M4X

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe3Rp0NsN3m
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxcSKylbVmg

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0b0HJtXge
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「一加一等於二。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkcon6Lyf6b
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「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZJ38NdDS0
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXbnWOcgjV

「……咦？」老師愣住了。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhZKtDL6IA
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTPCP3GioD

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9JOFwrploj
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡafN0wfO6kt

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhIgK8me9K
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「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoi0hChLRs
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6khy6PEodI

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1TFo01DXoE
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    完蛋了。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVUkSj2i3g
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「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWb6HtCQNe
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjpmQEl6sf

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9by8JZTcMP
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ16tlcGLEwC

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41qBiFjOHG
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcsDL2ja2r

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IIviw3uEJ
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfT9ESVgGE

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgsPGC35GKO
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcK00dyRt8n

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurRtL2i7tF
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWktdRLlZo1

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1B4pU3nxRg
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tD6PtDvNY

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe6ADvHulpn
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtu00Ateih8

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJ8n3i1Jq2
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Gf8qGuqDA

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvq7BXT4vMK
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6HzDHjhSY

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBVWsVBXJWA
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAI1ngvA6F5

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpWbeUe8bm

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWLlPGjYMH
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkz4XULNjxO

「同學！一加一等於多少！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrusIf13teh
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDM8uH5Hnma

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbghTM7fJXi
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgqURbLvDv

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW9JzVgRWfO
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTWGCaYLsgV

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsFT4rsRLj
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCvaApTzCL

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcU103ylTxR
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「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡViZXlAr0dl
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    全班盯著三岐。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE0rj4279fg
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「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAuq7enFQA
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    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYBhb1bq01
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmt1qTWAuP7

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMIgexW5bTD
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJargZ2E71

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuyDaRjtkk5
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當日結果：329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKTE52CI44
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    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYQOBkGhHr
329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcItK6vudFB

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20IKMpwufd
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    柳困依然單身。329Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzS4Sv60iZB