同學們面面相覷。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCzKGmgSxC
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6BtRbw7bg

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡroxv1F1DVB
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjfnLiatlX

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡekAcMaVokf
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCq4pBI5JIN

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmO7mX6ARGB
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzAtsYqIKC

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEv3xVwUxqC
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZsfLP8rA3

「那改成老不羞好了。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBawtISGP3R
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DvvdqtRM4

「更糟糕了啊！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwg0UFLxJw
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2Q0jH1Oyn

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwDvp0bf6U2
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxAsa0mwV7G

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeui1YKaAN
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPfJZ7VGj6

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV9pr9T4eG
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO6w5Wm6yZe

「老師，它正在暖身。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPHLd1nEpS
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKnGJ4jVo0C

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3neiLKSwZJ
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbp7USnfvlM

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtSaZ0fEjtn
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZZLsG1R2u

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDE7h8sU7Lb
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzympxK1ue6

「那我改姓三岐。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqujW9mwuh
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU79nsXcKg3

「才不是這個意思！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlodENV3LYd
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRLPtBMAtTD

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fFEdgv8TN
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIERITU5AxF

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4DUbmW3L7Y
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFqHqlrEXk

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXVGlQivy3
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxpOmbE4OMM

「元帥好弱。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhu5lBldL0h
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogYIcHuFMS

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0eBukSq7XR
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe6Dv46vXan

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLz4h4UG8aw
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU7EZplS0lF

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gBfu7eWeO
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bRNFhGoOx

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz5zQLt4sLg
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuyFo2WQrt
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa63TNcsNr5

「老師！別中計啊！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt4qgKscEMS
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhYdO1apUrG

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxNeKq5Fio
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1n0HQC0zJ

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VEcjUu3fT
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFGbB7G6Jl

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRtchXLUNi
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaaSyYmY1hi

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNR1a4J91qj
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXiYkKUYSd

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡau2V9H7A56
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡITOKgDFJf9

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6HrSvGl3O
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5LpPmy8fT

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuv5v3UqgXE
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaTf8nFdfIf

「什──」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmIzNyvWDB
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqU5ZAIGRu

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxq1weyldfF
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3HVG7qIRf

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUtMH77PvA
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ78AxJAlvU

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkDGMBI0oDi
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKUGUlSWHW

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPyncFagpe
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1kWmN7OaI

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAm1QcDO0I
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrJfuDkGskH

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZjF9OL4XYL
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiGdS2WVopc

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1XLEe67Dr
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Bp5nfNnKn

    賴妍歪頭。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPSXeFIs50
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3TB6gNpHwT

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1ejhKO7y4
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDpwzO8N3rn

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKux1pt2tLr
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2pgX0IPHJj

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKSTUFOwlG
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsBA1eVOOcl

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE95z15qAOw
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRj9vsPTwo

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbStZGLNkAs
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjabghXaPOl

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWyu4E2zCu
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSigVuiZRC5

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtDylfD0p9J
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9w6AZYGRe

「一加一等於二。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNcDvz6JGw2
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSdMSFRyIUn

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLIbwbSEedR
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfTKC6oqMK

「……咦？」老師愣住了。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYBRZkvTNx
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZHMA4h8YN

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9iJcbR2xI
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8HTJrcXWEP

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJ8MQsUyH3
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY57GaQxBVm

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXssF4IgyN
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfxPoLG57S

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFMtP3yqph
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxk5VPYBEv7

    完蛋了。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCVEuAWXyU2
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIOCR7c8SQ

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpU6YKvAX73
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnhao9Ijsl

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpMFxhAG8I
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO85rKaWdnf

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjkkgUNq8j
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡolyuCLErjy

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz2oXQDxpQl
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1rHaySweSL

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqV8IelDad
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ53vBEPIRN

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzShg7HQ72r
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BS1HyHjZ6

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2FBQS4Ke8
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JJQ1MLhA2

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6DZozMW9Or
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRBLugzR0T

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6GMgG3Uca
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLMOiSC2S3I

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOFZVddJ6h
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbAalGt0V7G

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkD7TBDa5T
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtrpuZJyc1b

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ71xBQ6QfFL

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkG57yMGnvP
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMnZxeCwCg

「同學！一加一等於多少！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzVXOeu5zm
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeiJ4mIsIYT

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4z7ZoXilBS
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPI3Q3vHVOi

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAU3pYdGdpL
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbK5TuaV9E

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhJmrXtWh1
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesKjL1nR1H

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGzwxYzUFs
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAnVDH4cm3I

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ8YsRb14oo
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbhFj9Qr33

    全班盯著三岐。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe77o44ECZi
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnziwDPyTq

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡop2J7YYsJD
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZpHjn3AEK

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKggNj3QsSn
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGlha5c2OXG

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukvjAvDekc
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRh2II3xZyi

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNC0qLTlEvq
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy39gEFSu60
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Si1aEbjSr

當日結果：326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQFWWVe0E0
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcIfZh80UO

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpePxSKEsm2
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb63yps3S1n

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEeqhI0UKRi
326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfEyOGAj5H

    柳困依然單身。326Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxmzESe0eSU