同學們面面相覷。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ928ilPUown
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCXmzaMuXW

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MKkiRxIcx
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFPRf2LcbR0

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkAxeaV0O2
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqpOELx7Q4

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WTMQjWpIW
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9eDMnGZut

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFyGAU3sTj0
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27D9kNbvPG

「那改成老不羞好了。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2jZX1jJqp
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡioPXaAKbnV

「更糟糕了啊！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4liwUnOTCa
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBP5ne9OPd

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvrAmsuVEtX
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1PVjrkkyA

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEWo0AilTz8
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbujgxk16u

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2JA5bJ34ju
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMfCdISpqWq

「老師，它正在暖身。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe08ERFWMyP
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFODqlSf1mB

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa4rBRstWBH
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUnPR2giTn

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKQFhE05tg
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrooNJWXWc

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcOZPo1Sa8
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHxe6smw5hd

「那我改姓三岐。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqS7MYM7PD
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlgWAftCZ4t

「才不是這個意思！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iyS2NxnyK
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqOlc3YaZq

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBhM2puAnZ3
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fGhiSvXFA

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlMVaHQv6O
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRF8US3CBCz

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqGGqfCKYca
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPfXGNUCHo

「元帥好弱。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ3cttZgIRM
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0rwUUUK2UU

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvbiwnYd9V
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMwDRGA9Vv

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyebGg7VWgW
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIVkFG6SAZq

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLg89EcRiW5
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwE5JsgaBMO

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJhDzMAHCp
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYaKJ2qIcBX
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIZjL6Z4z2

「老師！別中計啊！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XODrP4645
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvXCtm5ooR

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8gJhLwOqQ
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIhy3a39dJ9

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpFdSJ6n7m
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMegiMRrNj2

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtUPNDyn1z
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLGwlsWRNtV

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLukjnh0PVr
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1QnsKazcXN

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtXUAyQyfQ
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAIgUM7sZvF

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFz6fQoP5Ox
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB0pXw7uRQc

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoBPuaiysb
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTYA52e7Wi

「什──」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNsJMejW9q
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBn9mMv8XwI

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL3rL0Pd3lz
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS7ef3oplqv

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLa2XVdFVCF
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYzxTo1lO8

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcCTd7geok
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrc5lyId5Bz

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKWVOr1LHD
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBgiwjo8D0

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNp9R2Behs
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡglMML3ECeY

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HEugXxscW
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqtH3LlU18

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkf8y7ZlWlQ
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgdL0wME3ZM

    賴妍歪頭。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZNTVbrYTdt
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLJwLoHsiQ

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhEUJZ4zvVV
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6mkgTrlkt

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwOUzIZi2Ov
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSPXPVaY03

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5OQJgiex8
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60xDxK9VxM

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpPx2zHJW5Y
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ211ka2BnvW

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDppTbGNVmD
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEejFLD4tT

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNi7nZta8Q
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxI8nc3nMpz

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDsmaFfP24L
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7cLl5eym4

「一加一等於二。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOnY7KA0JIq
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWEeMYchhs

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjt2FTg2rJL
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMugXqK9kN

「……咦？」老師愣住了。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoglQfomAf
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy5xXJSHmpa

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTH79l6EBPE
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZpChebaaD

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmiigIBi5Mh
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxjmDBJVAz

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qR0MDgVfF
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIKRrgaRna5

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF01vjmAjTj
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdq0sSURXQv

    完蛋了。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMG4JDzGNJ9
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbIwRHtHXf1

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsFj6hcWb1
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKKVK32mez

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGvL1Iq8xn
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjr90XqKmUv

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoJRBrHfh6
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMnfnnq3Y63

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoAo47RcaDS
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKGVK3G7B3

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYRqUfkHHLU
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOocGfuErYZ

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfTviERcSfX
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQnXSh8yH5

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4gAvOsW9uB
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf9xjzpUT4y

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TQrZpaEFt
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqY0vPa4Rd

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbZ6vmu6Zd9
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcxQfwTxZLf

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRY3ovaBbwh
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99cw0jozCt

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDOiRgIgCKJ
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa3N77EApxk

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NM5Ra7ZoK

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWqODov1IEU
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHmabm1feSm

「同學！一加一等於多少！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuPZsfwvj2
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkeg4NRw7Qf

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCqEbpIzYS
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYpr8Wu1Dz

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEg4Di7cTPg
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsM3HlV9U3W

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEY01RQmX0
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rK8WXqkzt

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVksDwdwH4O
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3X1Ru2hrmo

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1lkPpXMv2
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYXDdfyhun

    全班盯著三岐。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCeMrBkJgec
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrKSpoRElE

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1KbkImXHHZ
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAvfSfMjqMB

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Gf36gtwuC
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtDLlOSZ0Ir

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaPJQ5BHWa0
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WeVZbJPu8

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpH88Co2RxC
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXjToWeJC9
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當日結果：284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxREu0jG2Qe
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gvf2DVkpz

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaNjetXYrPu
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1HP6ACsLpt

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xokMGG6qB
284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3U0lSmYdYn

    柳困依然單身。284Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlKouVavab