成人禮
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雖然嗰日同Jessica最後有啲尷尬,但係之後,我哋兩個都好似都冇嘢咁,變返好似以前咁,成日聯繫。
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我,照舊每日返工放工,但星期日呢,就會多咗搵Jessica出街,有時會去佢舖頭,睇吓佢裝修有冇啲咩嘢要幫手。 有時又會一齊幫佢做吓資料蒐集。當睇多啲嘢學多啲。總之就大家維持住朋友關係。
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好快又到左小弟20歲嘅生日。Jessica話想同我慶祝,但係我話正日咁重要嘅日子,我想留俾老媽子,問佢介唔介意提早或之後先幫我一齊慶祝?講真,我唔想大家有咩誤會。雖然咁樣諗好幼稚,同埋可能好多人都會覺得,後生仔使乜諗咁多,有啲咩就緊係要爽咗先啦。但我唔係咁諗,我之前嘅生日願望,係希望我以後啲日子唔好白過,包括談戀愛都係一樣,唔想好似其他𡃁仔咁,淨係睇到眼前嘅嘢,而唔去諗將來嘅事。 我唔想同Jessica 一開始因為甜蜜嘅感覺蒙騙左大家,去到最後,大家會真係因為視野嘅距離同分別,而產生拗撬,甚至導致要破壞或者結束一段感情。可能就算我事業有啲起色之後,然後拍拖,最後大家都可能會因為唔同嘅原因而分開,不過嗰啲嘢係預計唔到,但係我好清楚呢一樣嘢係我預計到嘅嘢,我就想盡量避開咗先。
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我有同Jessica講得好清楚,如果我哋決定開始嘅話,我想段感情係好認真,唔係小朋友嗰啲Puppy Love。 Jessica同我都好明白,佢同我都要時間去習慣呢個親密朋友模式。第一,佢都係啱啱甩拖,如果咁快有段新嘅戀情,我驚佢可能會仲混亂。第二,亦都係最重要嘅,就係如果我真係想同佢拍拖,起碼我覺得我喺事業上方面,都要迎頭而上。就算唔係講話要做老闆,但都起碼要搵多少少錢,拉近返大家嘅距離。 我由細到大都唔信童話故事,乜嘢灰姑娘遇上白馬王子,聽落去就好聽,但出邊嘅人咪一樣會諗到個女仔係為咗錢。如果調返轉個男仔係冇錢嘅,唔通第時要靠個女仔養佢咩? 雖然我咁樣諗係好守舊,但係我就係一個咁固執嘅人,有啲嘢唔係咁容易突破自己嘅框架。
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Jessica都明白我嘅睇法,但係佢就講笑咁同我講,佢話可能等等下我嘅時候,當見到一個更加鍾意嘅人,就唔會再等我。 我經歷咗之前梓慧嘅事,都好明白到好多嘢係唔會等人,但係始終我都冇改變我自己嘅諗法,如果我冇辦法喺事業上做出少少成就,我就唔會考慮開始呢段感情。
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我生日嗰日,都係要返工,不過就同英姐請咗假休夜晚,打算返屋企同阿媽食餐飯,然後一齊切蛋糕。走嗰陣時,英姐仲陰陰嘴笑咁同我講生日快樂,叫我快啲返屋企慶祝,走之前仲塞咗封利是俾我。
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收咗工打俾阿媽,同佢講,我去街市買餸,叫佢唔使買啦,淨係買個蛋糕返嚟同我切就得啦。點知佢話佢買晒餸,叫我快啲返去食就得啦。
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一打開屋企道門,黑蚊蚊,我個心仲諗緊,老媽子都幾注重儀式感㗎喎,肯定又會好老土咁拎個蛋糕出嚟同我唱生日歌啦。 你睇,估中晒。happy birthday to you。。。。咦,兩個人唱歌嘅? 當我個瞳孔擴大之後,望到原來Jessica都嚟咗! oh my god, 點解佢會知我住邊個單位? 我知啦,唔怪得之英姐陰陰嘴咁笑啦。 都話㗎啦,公屋嘅保安,係唔會過問訪客,所以Jessica好輕易就上咗嚟。對於Jessica嘅出現,我真係好surprise! 但係我又唔知點同老媽子解釋呢個人係咩人。
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老媽子突然同我講:「家晴,做咩拍拖咁耐而家先帶個女仔返嚟!」
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我:「吓?」
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呢一刻我真係唔知點答,答真話,又驚令到Jessica唔開心,答假嘅,又驚比咗個錯覺Jessica。
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點知Jessica搶着答:「auntie, 你個仔仲未應承我㗎,你可唔可以幫幫口?」
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唔知點解我突然諗起阿成同佢個未婚妻。會唔會其實一路以嚟都係自己諗多咗呢?其實點解一定要否定可以發展嘅可能性呢? 總之呢一刻,我個心就係溶化晒,我呢個小老頑童,乜嘢框架,乜嘢觀念呀,全部都即刻放低晒。我冇諗過Jessica身為女仔,但係會咁進取。相比起我,又諗前又諗後,做啲咩最後都係嘥氣。
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我:「老媽子,其實我追咗Jessica好耐㗎啦,佢今日先應承做我女朋友咋!」
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作為一個男人,點都要俾啲風度出嚟咁講。
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我繼續話:「Jessica,你真係唔後悔呀嘛? 老媽子,我拍拖你都冇問題呀嘛?」
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Jessica喊住咁講:「auntie,如果第時佢蝦我,你會幫我㗎何?」
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老媽子對住我講:「我點會反對呢?你成20歲人,你估我唔驚我冇新抱茶飲㗎?」
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然後佢笑笑口咁同Jessica講:「頭先你撳鐘,我都唔知咩事,有個鬼妹仔拎住一袋二袋嚟撳鐘,仲以為你會係嗰啲教徒送物資俾獨居長者,叫我信耶穌,估唔到你係家晴個女朋友,仲要識講中文嘅。哈哈。放心啦,我睇住家晴大,佢係除咗個人懶啲之外,個人心地都好好。而你呢,生得咁靚女,都睇中我哋家晴,佢執到啦。不過如果真係家晴第時蝦你,我實會幫你鬧死佢!你生得咁靚女,第時如果你哋真係結咗婚,生埋個孫,一定係靚仔靚女!我唔會俾家晴蝦走你,搞到我
冇咗個咁可愛嘅孫!哈哈」
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然後,我就捉住咗Jessica隻手,正式同佢喺埋咗一齊。
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我同Jessica講:「我預咗,我哋嘅將來會有好多風雨,但無論點都好,我今日拖得你隻手,我就會盡最大努力去維繫呢段感情。我將來未必可以比到好多嘢你,但我會將我自己最好嘅嘢都分享俾你!」
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Jessica:「我知道有啲嘢要自己爭取先會有。而你,就係我認定嘅,我鍾意嘅人,所以我先可以鼓起勇氣咁主動。我相信我嘅眼光唔會有錯!唔理第時係食粥定食飯,我哋都要一齊食!最多第時食粥嘅,剩係得我個碗粥有鹹蛋!哈哈」
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很多國家的成年為20歲。有學者講過,人類在20歲之前,大多數都還在學習成人的法則。 而到了20歲之後,人類就要開始要肩負成人責任。
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2016年冬,趙家晴剛滿20歲
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