Matthew's POV
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Green eyes like the depths of the forest open before me and I sigh having been watching her for a few moments. The peace and clarity leaving her expression when she remembers our conversation last night. My hands sweep around her hips and she sighs softly. Watching me as I pull her closer and stroke her tummy. Bells chiming in the distance as I attempt to block out the surging pain in my shoulder. The sun is weak today as the leaves rustle around the ground below.
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"You cannot be doing that shoot today" she comments and I relax. It seems Emily and I are talking normally despite our arguments.
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"I'll call in" I murmur thinking about telling Paul I've got to let him down.
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"It's Sunday anyways" she sighs which can only mean daddy is popping by. Obligatory roast day and talk to the father in law.
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"Who marries on a Sunday" she murmurs wiping her hazy eyes. The shoot is a wedding one. A happy couple ready to spend the rest of their lives together.
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"Lots of people you know" I quip and she smirks, holding my hands in her own when she looks upon me.
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"I never had a serious...you know" she begins slowly as I search her eyes. A look of insecurity on her face as she holds my hands and I gaze down at her engagement ring.
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"I know that's weird, I've had flings and boyfriends but I've never been seriously romantically involved before now. I think that's why I don't get the whole situation you have with Taylor" she whispers as I grip onto her.
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"I'm sorry I overreacted" she sighs and I wipe her eyes.
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"You did not. I should have been more... sympathetic. I just left you know. And the more time I spent here in England the more I grew away from it all" I explain and she smiles softly.
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"I understand you're going to Italy but just come back for me" she whispers. We spend a few minutes kissing in bed, the wind sweeps cool air into the room and I carry her to the shower. Turning the brass knob as the water pounds down onto the tiled floor. Setting her under the water and watching it stream down onto her body.
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"Let's have a relaxing day; long walks, dinner with your father" I whisper in her ear as the water skims over her.
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"More sex in the fields" I laugh as she giggles watching me join her in the shower.
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"More ?! With your shoulder" she laughs as I tickle her.
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"Yes more you don't think I'm up to taking you in amongst the daisies" I sigh and she laughs.
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"Okay well breakfast first and pain pills" she quips and I nod. Emily is the boss, but only because I allow her to be.
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"Let me make it" I smile as she scoffs wiping water off of her face.
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"Will it be edible?!" She laughs and I tickle her some more before washing her and massaging her back. Turning the shower off as the water drains away I vow to install an extractor fan when I come back. The steam collects everywhere as she wraps an Egyptian cotton towel around herself. Clipping her wet hair back and turning to face me briefly.
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"It will be pancakes" I say softly watching her walk through to the bedroom and place on a pale blue shirt and some loose jeans. She blushes heavily when she turns to look at me staring at her.
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"What !?" She sighs buttoning up my fanciest shirt and smiling in the long standing mirror. I approach her from behind and wrap my still wet arms around her as she giggles.
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"Are you wearing my shirt" I laugh and she scoffs, it's an expression she does all of the time.
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"Of course" she says defiantly as I giggle placing my hands under the fabric and stroking her again.
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"You need to get dressed or are you planning on making pancakes in your towel" she whispers as I watch her in the mirror. Her eyes searching my own as I look over her pale features and wet hair.
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"I love you Emily" I whisper looking at her in the mirror, her cheeks turn a glorious red as she smiles.
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"I love you Matthew" she whispers before shaking her head at my wet body all over the shirt and instructing me to get dressed.
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"Would you help me with my shirt or am I to go topless" I laugh indicting to my shoulder which is very much aching without the sling. Pulling it off of the oak dresser alongside my button up khaki shirt as she turns and appraises me.
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"I could get used to you shirtless" she smirks before holding the garment over my neck. I wince as my arms slide into the long sleeves and she tuts. The sling goes on next making me feel every bit the decrepit husband.
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"Ready for the best pancakes of your life" I smirk pushing my wet hair back.
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"Always" she smiles as I pocket my phone and we leave the canopy bed un-made. Clothes all over the floor and our chaotic messy bedroom left behind. I make the pancakes whilst holding her, my arms around her waist as she watches the batter form in the pan. Laughing as I toss them up and almost miss catching them back down in the pan.
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"This will be the best one" I say whilst making the third batch and she sighs rolling her eyes.
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"You can have this one. I'll never forgive myself if I make you crappy pancakes" I laugh as she giggles kissing my neck.
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"They're good" she sighs trying a few scraps from my first attempts.
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"Uh no this one will be better" I say stopping her as she laughs at me swiping her hands away playfully.
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"Take a seat" I whisper in her ear. Before I brew the tea and add her favourite sweetener setting the cup down on the table. And then cutting up fresh fruit and drizzling syrup everywhere. Including all over the white worktops and the gas rings.
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"Here'" I say as she looks up at me softly with a smile.
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"And there's fruit" I smile producing a bowl of fruit salad before taking a seat at the head of our table. Strawberries and kiwis which she eyes happily before eating heartily. I fork up my own less perfectly formed pancake and stare out at the grounds for a second, the weak sun and the rustling leaves. It's the perfect day for a horse ride. However considering my recent injuries and the undoubtable lecture I would receive from Emily I keep my mouth closed for now.
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"What are you thinking?" She asks slowly watching me as I look out at the puffy clouds. It's unusual for such a clear day in October however I'm sure the temperatures are cool outside. The sun is deceiving.
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"I was thinking it's the perfect day for a horse ride. However considering my injury" I laugh at her abashed expression.
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"Not so perfect after all" she laughs looking at the sling as I grimace and take some pain medication.
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"Grazer. Silly bloody horse ran straight for his pen. Had that of been Apollo he would still be galloping around the countryside" she giggles and I cannot help but to agree. Apollo is a far more adventurous male horse, rather than grazer who appears much more vulnerable.
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"Look it won’t be long” she laughs eyeing my sulky expression, like a small child who has been told he can no longer ride his bike or play with his toys. I nod slowly and she smiles. Emily has solely introduced me to horse riding, it’s become a past time that we enjoy and share. Frolicking around the immediate land with but the fresh air and the sun on our backs.
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Emily stands briskly having finished her pancake and clears away the kitchen. Pottering around and banging plates as she washes them. Clinking cutlery around before she sips her tea and looks upon the large double fridge with a calendar placed upon it with a magnet. A pink heart magnet with the words daddy’s girl on it. I wonder how I became a man who shares a calendar attached to a fridge with his fiancée.
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“Hen do is next weekend” she announces, Emily and three other girls are travelling to the south of France in October. It will be cold and nothing like a typical on the beach hen do, but Emily is set on it.
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“I’ll take a look at flights” I say looking over at the grounds as she hovers, stress cleaning. I’m sure it bothers her a great deal having me leave for Italy. And not only that but to visit my ex-partners home, even though she is now married to my best friend.
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“When will you return” she asks as I stare out at the weak sun and imagine the deep rays that will beam down in Italy. How the children will be older and more grown up. I begin to wonder whether Henry will even recognise me, considering that it has been years. It’s likely that as he was very young when I left that he may not even remember me at all. A pit of regret opens up in my gut, the closer I get to leaving for Italy, the more the feelings resurface. Only lurking within them are my sorrows. The worries that I have just missed too much and worse that nobody has missed me.
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“Matthew” she says alarmed as I stare out of the panes of glass contemplating, worrying and almost sobbing.
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“Sorry yeah will be just for the weekend” I admit wiping my eyes as she looks away. Rustling around with stuff in the kitchen to avoid the conversation. The what’s wrong questions and the why are you crying chat we should be having. Embarrassed, I pull myself together, deep breaths. As I realise one day, Emily will know everything about me. The engaged eighteen year old that dreamed of having babies and spending the rest of his life with Taylor. The thought worries me and I stand collecting my jacket from the cloakroom. Retrieving hers as she places a hand on my back and helps me into my wool jacket.
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The look Emily gives me when we finally leave the house, her wrap up jacket pulled tightly around her, her face solemn and her worried eyes that tell me I’ll have a lot of explaining to do for my most recent mood swings.
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