The first month was the worst. It was when he was at his peak when it came to Media attention. Everyone and everything knew what he was then because it was all that was ever talked about. Did you see his stellar performance or did you see the Japanese dragon he got on his back from the most famed Japanese tattoo artist of all time. Everything was about him. It was hard because I struggled, struggled to erase the memories of that night. It kept playing over and over and over like a broken record player.
89Please respect copyright.PENANAOEwDwgTUJd
“Girl we can have this house to ourselves”
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Merriam jumps on the couch
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“Merriam this man has cameras”
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“And”
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She grabs my arms tries to get me to jump but I decline and continue cleaning
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“This month has been peaceful with bang boy away”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAy26LbBSoPs
She falls onto the couch and smiles
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“So comfy”
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“Glad you like it”
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After the first month those teasingly weeks until his arrival made me happy. I was happy to escape what I have made unprofessional and tainted. Tainted with what I swore never to do. But then something I never expected happened
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“Huh that’s weird”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAGBlJbFUO9g
Merriam hands me some pads and I take it
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“What”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAarzRqDfaIS
“Well my period is late”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAK2iooCfoTV
She looks at me and my heart drops
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“It’s late”
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I repeat this over and over again before letting out a screeching scream
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“NO”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAysV5V7sAuG
Me and Merriam rush to the pharmacy and pick up a pregnancy test. I can’t have this happen, I can’t be pregnant there is no way. Once we Enter the penthouse I make a beeline for the bathroom and rip open the pregnancy test. After I pee on the stick I leave the bathroom and crouch down crying
89Please respect copyright.PENANAOY2nFrXtQ8
“I can’t Merriam I can’t be pregnant”
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She walks into the bathroom and picks up the stick
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“I-“
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She walks toward me solemnly and bends down. In her face I can see her deepest of sympathies as I grab the stick and look
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Pregnant
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I felt my soul rip from me as I lay down and cry. Merriam brushes my hair from my face as the past two days has been spent crying in my house and at work. I never thought about it but the memories of me eating and throwing up especially pop up now. Merriam will make different foods for me thinking that Ryder must have made contact with papa legba and sent me a baby since he is sometimes viewed as a fertility god.
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“I doubt Ryder knows who papa legba is Merriam”
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She stirs the soup
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“You don’t know it’s hollywood after all. Now drink so you can get this baby out”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAMojBfw2jeC
After a week of throwing up my throat was sore and my mind was soo hazy. I know I have to tell Ryder and see what we do from here but the thought of that convo alone scares me. I sweep the floor and feel the urge to throw up but I try to hold it in
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“GIRL HES COMING”
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Merriam throws away all her plans about how to get rid of the baby brung by papa legba in the garbage and I prepare myself for seeing his face again. I hear the keys enter the lock and my body tenses as each agonizing seconds leads me closer and closer to seeing him again
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“Hayyy maidsss”
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A woman enters and it’s the same one he left with on tour. She smiles and gets closer to us
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“Ladies we will be having a party today”
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She rambles on and on but pregnancy brain is making me forget all of what she was saying
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“Huh”
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Merriam laughs out loud and the lady looks dumbfounded
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“What you mean huh I said we will have a small party today so please make this place look like a marble beauty” she walks away and my eyes catch Ryder coming in. I can see the stubble across his face and also his hair now touching his upper back as he walks in with a suitcase.
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“Get these washed”
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Merriam nods yes and drags his luggage away. We exchange a look then I turn away
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“Make me a smoothie”
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I nod okay and walk to the make him the regular. I hand it to him and go to walk away
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“Stay we need to talk about your resignation”
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I walk back
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“I have collected the papers. I have signed them and will be mailed off today. They won’t know the real reason other than familial matters so relax”
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I nod alright. Shit I have to pee
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“I have to pee now”
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I rush to the bathroom and pee then come back out and see him still sitting.
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“I’m sorry please continue”
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He nods okay
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“Well I will send them off tonight but for now we are having 3 guest come in. Candlelit dinner is what I’m going after”
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I have to tell him now
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“Ryder I need to tell you something”
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I take a deep breath in and out
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“I’m-“
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“ENGAGED YESSS”
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The woman comes back out interrupting me and flings herself to Ryder. Merriam’s face screams don’t tell
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“Me and Ryder are happily engaged so I’m happy and hopeful of our marvelous future”
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FUCK
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I rush to the sink and throw up. Merriam rushes to my side
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“What the fuck”
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The lady walks to me and turns on the sink
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“My gosh a better response then puking to my engagement would’ve been way better”
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“I’m sorry”
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I wipe my mouth with a napkin and Ryder looks at me
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“Upset stomach”
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“For how long”
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Ryder stands up and stands near the woman. His eyes dim as he glares at me
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“Since yesterday. I have been eating soup”
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“Eat more. Merriam make us all a nice soup”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAi1p5oOFTvf
She nods okay and I sit on the far end as the others sit on the opposite end. He’s engaged to her, I mean it’s not like she’s a better choice then most women in Hollywood but if I was to keep the baby, she would be in its life. And from the looks of it that might be a bad idea.
89Please respect copyright.PENANA32U6uu1XAR
“So I was planning of a beach wedding”
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The lady shoves a magazine in front of me and points to the wedding a latest celebrity had.
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“Looks nice”
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She smiles and shows me her ring
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“24 karat diamond ring from monteque. I know it was a pretty penny to purchase”
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“How pretty”
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“I don’t know like a million”
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“Damn that’s really pretty”
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“I know”
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Well glad to know my kid won’t be struggling if i do go with keeping it.
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“Psst”
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Merriam hands me soup and whispers in my ear
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“He looks like he’s encountered papa legba”
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I quickly look at Ryder and see his regular unfazed face
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“I doubt that Merriam. Stop being paranoid”
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“What, can’t I as a proud Haitian woman tell you when I know a person has encountered an Iwa”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAi21OXBHDGk
We both look at him then look away
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“Merriam keep your conspiracy theories on the low for now”
89Please respect copyright.PENANATAjljB26Bz
She shakes her head okay and eats her soup
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“By the way what did you have to tell me Sam”
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I swallow my soup down hard as Ryder focuses on me
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“Nothing really”
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“Alright then”
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He stands up and offers the woman a hand up
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“Although she introduced herself to you guys she hasn’t said her name. Maids meet Natasha. She’s my fiancé”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAvaUtHq569B
We wave hi and Natasha waves back eagerly
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“Hi maids I’m so happy to be here”
89Please respect copyright.PENANATvTNC9w1OW
They walk to the window to chat and I massage my temples
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“Of all the fishes in the sea he choose a chatty one”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAR2PjH9wpQA
Merriam sits next to me and hands me another bowl of soup
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“At least he looks content”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAfoGiTdKnli
My phone rings in my pocket and I smile as I see James
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“James”
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“Sam”
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I smile warmly as I excuse myself outside to speak
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“James you haven’t spoken to me in a while. what the hell”
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“I know”
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“NO YOU DONT KNOW BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU”
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I control my anger and feel my sadness start set in
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“I’m sorry Sam I really am-“
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“No your not”
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I sob on the phone and sit down
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“Sam I wanted to tell you that I’m back in town”
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“Really”
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Like a dog my ears perk as happiness floods in
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“Woah talk about a change in moods”
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I smile embarrassingly. Must be the pregnancy hormones
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“I’m sorry”
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“It’s alright. I know every Friday you leave early so when you do please change and meet me “
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“I can’t tonight Ryder and his fiancé need us to prep a candlelit dinner”
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“He has a fiancé”
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“Yeah but don’t tell anyone alright”
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“You got my word. So how about tomorrow”
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I smile
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“Yeah”
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“Alright I think you have to get going so bye”
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“Bye James”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAYnUnX7nb6H
I hang up and walk inside the apartment to see Merriam and Natasha arguing
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“MARBLE WILL MAKE YOU LOOK UGLY CHOOSE BLACK”
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“BLACK WONT GO WELL WITH MY LIMITED EDITION GUCCI CULTURE”
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“THEN EAT OUT THEN”
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“FINE”
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I slowly close the door behind me and Merriam spots me
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“SAM”
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She storms at me and holds grips my shoulder
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“Does marble go with Gucci culture or the MARVELOUS BLACK”
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I can see Natasha follow too and she pushes Merriam aside to speak to me
89Please respect copyright.PENANA7ckJ3eQGES
“NO MAID. I think Gucci culture goes well with the MARVELOUS MARBLE”
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They stare each other down but my mind is focused on the bathroom. If I get there quick I might be able to pee
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“We’ll make what is it”
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I look back at Natasha
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“I think you should eat out”
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“TOLD YA”
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They continue arguing and I run the bathroom to pee. Once I get out I see Ryder listening in on Natasha and Merriam. I take this time to place my gloves on and clean the penthouse door. I grab the bucket and slyly make my way to the apartment hallway and close the door. I take a deep breath in and start scrubbing with a scented detergent
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“Trying to escape the arguing”
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The door opens and I look up to see Ryder. He closes it behind him and leans his back on the wall as I clean
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“Not really I just need to do my job”
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I scrub all around the doorknob and bell
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“Your a weird one”
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Ryder grabs the rag from my hand
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“Now let’s have a real conversation about what happened a month and a half ago”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAmTnAfnXXvH
Petrified I grab the rag back and turn away from him
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“There’s no need”
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I get in all the nooks and crannies of the door as the memories of such night start to reappear. The last thing I need right now is to be triggered from such Events.
89Please respect copyright.PENANAMdDI1Ur8zN
“Why not, it is the reason why your resigning”
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I place the rag down
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“Fine”
89Please respect copyright.PENANApjiLXqCQjp
We sit on the windowsill and observe the bustling street life from above
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“What happened that nice was a drunken mistake. I was upset about that man giving my dog some whiskey and cried. Everything I held in I cried and drank. You happened to be there so things happened to happen”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAb4UxeZDCtv
I steer clear from Ryders eyes as I glance at the tall skyscrapers reflecting the suns light
89Please respect copyright.PENANAv4QEGDu6Pv
“So did you mean what you told me when you told me to admit that I hated my life”
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I sheepishly look away as I feel my face flush
89Please respect copyright.PENANAljIlJzvs70
“Yes. When your drunk don’t you always speak the truth”
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Ryder looks onward at me and shrugs
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“That is for me to know and you to never find out”
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I stand up and stroll towards the bucket and squat
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“Well mister Ryder I must clean the door. Please don’t think I’m cutting our conversation short”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAmiqfElpBg0
Ryder sits up and walks towards the elevator
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“No need for proper talk Sam I know that doesn’t suit you well”
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He enters the elevator and I ignore his words. All because I talk normal he thinks that proper behavior doesn’t suit me. I swear rich people and their fucking antics. After a while of cleaning and making sure Merriam and Natasha doesn’t rip their throats out Ryder decided that it’s best we go home
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“I will send you each an outfit to wear for tonight’s outing. Most likely you will be photographed. For now you will pretend to be my fiancés friend”
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We nod okay and I walk towards the train and go home. One I enter home I hear chubs wonder barking as he runs to me and jumps up. I lift him up and gently place him on the couch
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“Alright chubs no barking alright”
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I look at the pile of envelopes on the small table and pick them up. Ah yes more envelopes telling me my rent is due. I place the envelopes down and in my mirror I lift my shirt up.
89Please respect copyright.PENANAlRlpuXZek7
“Alright so I’m 7 weeks along”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAm3WvxzeuBp
I look for any sign of a bump but then again I’m chubby so a bump can be mistaken for some fat. I hear a knock on the door and when I open it I see a kind man holding a bag
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“For you”
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I slip him five bucks then close the door. when I open the bag I see a long black backless dress with a note inside.
89Please respect copyright.PENANAaD8gh6Ob4Z
For you from Me
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I smile to myself and shake the bag, when I do a book falls out
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“Hmm”
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I grab the book and read the title
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Evergreens love galore
89Please respect copyright.PENANANWSbGZjRvM
I read the back and I find myself smiling harder. This must be a sequel to secretive enchantment. In this sequel this girl and man live together in the castle and something happens to the girl. Forced to keep a secret she must choose between happiness or devastation.
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“What a cornball”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAiEeyV1OZBt
I place the book down on the table and go to shower. After I shower I check the time and I rush as I’m suppose to meet up at the restaurant in 10 minutes. Time flies when your worrying about pregnancy, dresses and books. I blow dry and curl my hair as quickly as I can then place the dress on slowly to not rip it
89Please respect copyright.PENANAfb8cUQ1JPy
“Of course he chose this dress look how tight it looks”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAqvjEqmQGq1
I examine the dress on me as and notice that my bust was bigger then before and sorer too. Ugh I can’t worry about that now and hopefully this won’t affect me never. I rush out the house and walk to a car that Ryder has sent out for me. I feel my nausea start to boil over so I crack open the window to feel the fresh air as we drive. These heels are abusing my toes but you know what I gotta deal with it.
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“RYDER RYDER”
89Please respect copyright.PENANATW9Ap8PY3Y
The screams of rabid people fill my ears as multiple flashing lights blind the entrance of the restaurant. I can see Ryder and Natasha interlocking arms as they enter the restaurant. His Pr team must have tipped the paparazzi here. I soon get out of the car and hear Merriam’s voice in the distance
89Please respect copyright.PENANA1WZCVD0ctQ
“SAM”
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She runs to me and then stops.
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“You didn’t go inside yet”
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She shakes her head no and takes a deep breath in and out
89Please respect copyright.PENANA4vwg1gRhGX
“You see how much paparazzi is there. The reason they are here because this has been known to be a celebrity hotspot only every Friday. Fancy as hell I know but really I bet they serve food that are very small in portion. It’s like you pay a thousand for a nibble”
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We walk into the restaurant and the bouncer stops us
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“Who’s your connection”
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“Ryder”
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The bouncer checks the list
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“Names”
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“Sam and Merriam”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAZMlbj3u34z
He nods okay and we enter inside. The smell of seafood and candles swarm the place as soft and warm instrumentals play in the background. The view of the Hudson River and the skylight illuminate the place as it’s dim in nature. We make our way through the chatty crowds to the balcony upstairs where it is lined up with other wealthy people who can afford such luxury. Natasha waves us over and we make our presence known.
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“Look nice maids”
89Please respect copyright.PENANA9YZEwXbBdo
Ryder takes his eyes off the menu and looks up at me and for a second I swear I can see something other than a distant stare. For a second in his eyes I can sense some what of a soft look, It’s as if he was staring at a puppy
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“Sit ladies”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAEL6UZDoVuy
We all sit down in the round glass table and we pick up the menus. I glance over the menu and so far I see far more caviar dishes then anything of real substance. The only thing I see there that really peeks my interest is a seafood boil.
89Please respect copyright.PENANAneW91msnft
“Well hello what would you loves like to order”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAG4hvtH46lr
Merriam goes first and orders a mushroom infused spaghetti made with wagyu meatballs with a side of caviar. Next Natasha and Ryder over risotto with various seafood dishes with a side of wagyu
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“And you mam”
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I rub the bridge of my nose and smile
89Please respect copyright.PENANAzGSNGtxrqk
“May I have the seafood boil please. Add extra potatoes”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAdtOj38b26n
Natasha and Merriam look at me as if I’m stupid
89Please respect copyright.PENANABEmfdBsypm
“Girl you are in a fancy restaurant and someone’s paying. Don’t be afraid to go all out”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAfHJug9sBNe
Merriam whispers this to me and I hold her hand
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“Really all these foods aren’t very-“
89Please respect copyright.PENANAtfaIoTiPLf
“Very what”
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Ryder takes a sip of his wine and looks at me. I see a hint of enthusiasm in his eye as he awaits my answer
89Please respect copyright.PENANAxhAQmfAk8N
“Well these are great foods but I’m not hungry for that much”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAiNaqpNzZbg
Natasha laughs and playfully hits Ryders arm
89Please respect copyright.PENANALm8Hug8wlR
“Babe you know someone coming here for the first time will not know what to order. Relax on her”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAWX1wfXpmCX
She lays her head on his shoulder and together we all sit in silence and listen to the music play. I close my eyes and slip into the beat when the sounds of dishes against the table alert me. I look up to see many seafood dishes in my bowl
89Please respect copyright.PENANAzKbxTEyTKg
“Gimme some”
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I give Merriam some squid and in exchange she gives me a bite of her wagyu meatball
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“Guugh”
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I gag and spit the meatball out. Natasha gasp but Ryder laughs hard
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“Exactly how I felt when I ate those for the first time”
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I drink water and eat my food to push the gag feeling down and after a while I feel my body start to relax.
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“Drink some”
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Natasha pours a glass of wine and hands it to me
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“Ah no thank you I’m not very thirsty for wine”
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Natasha pushes it closer to me
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“Oh but I Insist”
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Merriam looks at me then grabs the wine glass and chugs the wine
89Please respect copyright.PENANAnkMJUf9Wp1
“She can’t drink wine it’s against her religion to do so today”
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I grin at Merriam
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“Yea it isn’t worth the trouble to break culture today”
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Ryder nods okay and does a cheers
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“To my first day back”
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We all clank glasses and after a while I see Natasha start to get even more drunk on wine and Merriam already drunk but getting drunker
89Please respect copyright.PENANAzDb2XqzhNh
“I swear people really don’t know how to control their liquor”
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Ryder takes the last sip of wine from his glass and stands up
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“Follow me”
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I nod okay and we walk towards the end of the balcony where the cool breeze of the river takes over. In this spot it’s more dimmer and yet so peaceful
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“I want to thank you once again for coming out”
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Ryder remains facing towards water. I can see the intensity in his eyes even when we are in a calm environment
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“It’s just my job-“
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“No this isn’t what a maid does. They don’t go out to eat with their employers but the fact you did. I thank you”
89Please respect copyright.PENANAtNnkIc4ObC
He gives me a soft look then looks back forward
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“Your welcome”
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He points to a star above us
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“We rarely see stars in New York City yet in this exact moment we caught one. Fate works in mysterious ways doesn’t it”
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I walk forward and stand next to him
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“Yeah”
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Alright you have to tell him now
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“Ryder i-“
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“RYDER WHERE ARE YOU”
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I see his attention focus back on Natasha
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“Alright we gotta go”
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“NO WAIT”
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I grab his arm
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“Bold aren’t we Sam”
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He turns his back to Natasha and looks down at me
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“Speak since you have me here”
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I look up at him
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“I’m pregnant”
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