前言
不完美的我,不完整的我,根本沒有被愛或愛人的資格。65Please respect copyright.PENANAg7hDPq4vNb
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即使有人說喜歡我,我也無法完全相信,因為當他看見真實的我時,還有辦法說出這樣的話嗎?65Please respect copyright.PENANA3tIhGQ05pP
65Please respect copyright.PENANA8b7NN6xPw2
正因為不完整,才要用面具遮掩那支離破碎的自我,儘管被喜歡上了,那也只是喜歡上那個面具吧………65Please respect copyright.PENANA7iiEuTbUST
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打從你離開時,我就戴上面具了。因為,那時的我,早已支離破碎,毫無自我可言,就讓面具控制我,讓我繼續漂流在這早已瓦解的現實吧…………
我,沒有愛人的資格。65Please respect copyright.PENANAwNYo44sG9s
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崩壞的自信,取而代之的是無盡的自卑。65Please respect copyright.PENANADHkE43LEdp
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妳的一句話,將我深深的打入谷底,墜入無底的深淵。原來之前的一切,都只是謊言,直到最後一刻,妳才讓我看清現實,因為那個秘密,所以我永遠不會完美。65Please respect copyright.PENANAfItO1DiPaZ
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為了隱藏這個事實,我將一層又一層的面具戴了起來,這些都只是為了不讓自己被看透,為了讓他人認可我。65Please respect copyright.PENANAB0zBjthQSd
一.同樣的現實
(嗶-嗶-嗶-)65Please respect copyright.PENANAxtA7rchDmh
65Please respect copyright.PENANApRZLIocmGd
鬧鐘叫了無數次,已經醒來很久了,卻遲遲沒有關掉鬧鐘的原因是………………………65Please respect copyright.PENANAYhQs00tnT1
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不想再去面對那殘酷的現實。65Please respect copyright.PENANA3auzIGoY3r
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“課,還是要去上的。”65Please respect copyright.PENANAqpzPbm63ZQ
65Please respect copyright.PENANALp4Qz4RmfG
你的話突然在我腦中浮現,明明是很久以前的事了,為什麼到現在還會不時的想起你呢?或許……是我傻了吧…………65Please respect copyright.PENANA3TpgbF3ZhK
65Please respect copyright.PENANA4UXCbhvbh4
在想著這件事的同時,人已經莫名其妙的到了教室坐著。65Please respect copyright.PENANAxPLUQoKrGU
65Please respect copyright.PENANAd8PQqR5i3X
“抱歉,請問隔壁可以坐嗎?”65Please respect copyright.PENANAmv8rLZyrIi
65Please respect copyright.PENANArw86fSOnQq
“嗯,當然可以。”65Please respect copyright.PENANAqUwLbRGEEI
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教室已經沒有空位了,難怪要選我旁邊這個位置…………65Please respect copyright.PENANAfPix806XHf
65Please respect copyright.PENANAhu7pninS0h
“我叫陳紹翔,同學妳叫什麼名字?”65Please respect copyright.PENANAxFWlMSVTZw
65Please respect copyright.PENANAO3VfITGXXs
“我叫紀悅涵。”65Please respect copyright.PENANAPf0fla1x5U
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為什麼要問我的名字啊…………65Please respect copyright.PENANAwaUgFVXE8v
65Please respect copyright.PENANA6rOHmuPtyc
“啊!抱歉,剛才教授說這次要做分組報告,所以我才會問妳的名字…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANAE488FbzcvH
65Please respect copyright.PENANATRaKHdikFS
像是看透我的疑惑一般,他急忙解釋道。難怪所有位置都滿了,只剩我旁邊這個位置…………剛才沒注意看,其實他長得滿帥的………………65Please respect copyright.PENANA0hMWJAEIOy
65Please respect copyright.PENANAvHRg92Oev0
“嗯,沒關係……抱歉因為我剛剛沒注意聽…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANAKNQMkevvIt
65Please respect copyright.PENANALMZRSNoBPI
“啊!那個……沒關係……”65Please respect copyright.PENANAtv5RuMjHo1
65Please respect copyright.PENANAxZOuBQaeh6
“喂!那邊的同學!不想上課的話可以出去!這堂課不需要製造噪音的學生!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAo9h7SFe33T
65Please respect copyright.PENANAMKj86zPQqM
“啊…抱歉…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANAdtMPMpmMEG
65Please respect copyright.PENANAmURiR2sBCs
他尷尬的笑了笑,便趁教授轉身之際比了中間的那根手指,還調皮的笑著對我比了一個安靜的手勢。65Please respect copyright.PENANA0pyvVaxXAH
65Please respect copyright.PENANAQoglu4GbWc
“噗!”65Please respect copyright.PENANALINfteGeHc
65Please respect copyright.PENANAcDODKQc69D
我忍不住,不禁笑出聲來,因為他實在太有趣了。仔細想想,自從你離開以後,我就再也沒有像這樣發自真心的笑過了………65Please respect copyright.PENANAeVZGkvNQiy
65Please respect copyright.PENANAaF1e2GxUgM
“學……紀同學!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAeXSlYbkhbC
65Please respect copyright.PENANAMH8rAZax4J
“啊?什麼?”65Please respect copyright.PENANAvffm2deCQG
65Please respect copyright.PENANAj3kZtg9Vsr
“妳還好嗎?因為剛剛妳的臉色不是很好……”65Please respect copyright.PENANA2K6I9x0gcz
65Please respect copyright.PENANAHBFJ8Tmz2j
“啊,我沒事…………還有,直接叫我紀悅涵或悅涵就好了。”65Please respect copyright.PENANA7H5sABHO23
65Please respect copyright.PENANAif8A0bxKVs
“好!那妳也直接叫我阿紹就好!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAo5MtRN1w36
65Please respect copyright.PENANAUaVV9QRdBp
“好喔~”65Please respect copyright.PENANACVydRVYNHj
65Please respect copyright.PENANAeCOsZPcdTm
「涵」,是專屬於你的叫法,除了你以外,我不想讓任何人這樣叫我,儘管……那是曾經………………65Please respect copyright.PENANAwikeF8rmyP
65Please respect copyright.PENANAswWZimmMVt
現實還是相同的,你離開我身邊,我無法忘了你…………
二.無法放下
“我要一杯摩卡,謝謝。”65Please respect copyright.PENANAxEy9N0lIIG
65Please respect copyright.PENANA2gapFMDzUl
甜蜜中帶著苦澀,或許這是戀愛的味道,或亦是妳的味道,先是給予我甜蜜的滋味,再送給我濃濃的苦澀,不,用摩卡來形容妳未免也太美好了。65Please respect copyright.PENANA3iUcdpGeE5
65Please respect copyright.PENANAqTcMOukynx
一樣的街道,一樣的光景,卻缺少了妳的身影,也對,妳打從一開始就不想接近我,妳的出現只不過是要讓我認清現實罷了65Please respect copyright.PENANAvZnbzCpedn
65Please respect copyright.PENANAKwszGTAMJx
“我是不完美的。”65Please respect copyright.PENANA0EUzPUDDJb
65Please respect copyright.PENANAmHpzyadO2H
“沒有任何一個人是完美的,所以別自暴自棄啊!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAnFPvSjBfjo
65Please respect copyright.PENANAOSdPWmIsfJ
呵……永遠演不膩的肥皂劇橋段………………65Please respect copyright.PENANAzAOqHzLFJe
65Please respect copyright.PENANAQ8wO3v162L
當然,沒有一個人是完美的,但,不完美還是有程度上的區別,如果是到支離破碎的程度,還有辦法輕鬆的說出這句話嗎?65Please respect copyright.PENANARvjrgvlfF4
65Please respect copyright.PENANAjHOEaLkmEs
(叮-叮-叮)65Please respect copyright.PENANARpqamVgGI8
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3點了,該去上課了………………65Please respect copyright.PENANA1WlPhO5FCt
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“吼~你又來了!快給我去上課啦!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAauF3rLXjHI
65Please respect copyright.PENANAlSxZ9YnPPx
“好啦~”65Please respect copyright.PENANAjxDlZPb3Y4
65Please respect copyright.PENANAc6yr6pGwxI
回憶又莫名其妙的湧上,明明已經不斷的提醒自己認清現實,但回憶卻像是不受控制般瘋狂的浮現…………65Please respect copyright.PENANAC3Nj3dhcHC
65Please respect copyright.PENANAjfWaO64vRx
“停止,拜託,快點停下來!”65Please respect copyright.PENANALRSSWX5P1G
65Please respect copyright.PENANAYSXMUyMWLp
像是無視內心吶喊般,回憶依然不斷湧出,甚至變本加厲,浮現更多令人心痛的那段美好時光………………65Please respect copyright.PENANAOH2khT6b6L
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“啊……沒位置了…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANA0RAnUBDPZm
65Please respect copyright.PENANALhhRia6GMK
在內心如此想著的同時,我望見了一個位置……只不過,那個位置旁邊有女孩,而且今天還要分組報告,算了……成績比較重要………………65Please respect copyright.PENANAB4Xz7Mavhr
65Please respect copyright.PENANAL5CI6A5eKW
“抱歉,請問隔壁可以坐嗎?”65Please respect copyright.PENANAdCymRApsrH
65Please respect copyright.PENANATrP88odHl7
“嗯,當然可以。”65Please respect copyright.PENANAwfjfdPC8mw
65Please respect copyright.PENANA9JMjo0Z0D4
“我叫陳紹翔,同學妳叫什麼名字?”65Please respect copyright.PENANAuVyLv1suTa
65Please respect copyright.PENANArcIVacMgEV
“我叫紀悅涵。”65Please respect copyright.PENANA9hM1QCJfo7
65Please respect copyright.PENANAdaEZU16YoS
她的表情怪怪的,難不成…………65Please respect copyright.PENANAqZKhQHjtDd
65Please respect copyright.PENANAMFhqRo457j
“啊!抱歉,剛才教授說這次要做分組報告,所以我才會問妳的名字…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANAlHFIVY5pas
65Please respect copyright.PENANApMGd4hKKD8
“嗯,沒關係……抱歉因為我剛剛沒注意聽…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANAKrD9sEKEEX
65Please respect copyright.PENANACZMx1sUtOd
“啊!那個……沒關係……”65Please respect copyright.PENANAyzrh71AYy0
65Please respect copyright.PENANAbd1O6IgIOL
“喂!那邊的同學!不想上課的話可以出去!這堂課不需要製造噪音的學生!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAooP0dRPwKn
65Please respect copyright.PENANABKHyK9kqbK
“啊…抱歉…………”65Please respect copyright.PENANAdxQO2XgFCP
65Please respect copyright.PENANAIDq6c5lmuQ
去你的教授咧!看我比你中指!啊!旁邊還有人…………希望她不要講出去…………65Please respect copyright.PENANAfU2Nta4pki
65Please respect copyright.PENANAjiQtpQPge0
“噗!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAuE0n3Ka8lo
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她笑了,其實她長得蠻漂亮的…………嗯?臉色突然變得好難看…………65Please respect copyright.PENANA9TJBrWPu5T
65Please respect copyright.PENANARsClieUexQ
“紀同學!紀同學!”65Please respect copyright.PENANA12DXavyc4Y
65Please respect copyright.PENANATfkRy9tCVx
“啊?什麼?”65Please respect copyright.PENANAoTXFbdZGiW
65Please respect copyright.PENANAa8BTyY1wmt
“妳還好嗎?因為剛剛妳的臉色不是很好……”65Please respect copyright.PENANAScbY8kdobt
65Please respect copyright.PENANAjB8344a72g
“啊,我沒事…………還有,直接叫我紀悅涵或悅涵就好了。”65Please respect copyright.PENANAsK4hjPjje1
65Please respect copyright.PENANA1vjXb4T7Mr
真的嗎?……算了,反正不干我的事…………65Please respect copyright.PENANA7fizmX53sA
65Please respect copyright.PENANArK4K1pkNDA
“好!那妳也直接叫我阿紹就好!”65Please respect copyright.PENANAQhiVxNsX1z
65Please respect copyright.PENANACH72ziyN8b
“好喔~”65Please respect copyright.PENANAOYpDPyxFFK
65Please respect copyright.PENANAzaARaPpQyW
「紹」,是妳專屬的叫法,我無法讓別人這麼叫我,儘管過了那麼久,我還是無法放下啊…………
三.棄
自從那次的報告後,我和阿紹變得越來越熟,漸漸地,我們成了非常要好的朋友。與其說朋友,倒不如說………有點曖昧…………
我,該踏出這一步嗎?我,可以放開去愛嗎?我,不知道。
因為之前犯下的錯誤,我已經失去太多了,你帶來的傷害,對我造成永久的創傷…………我……膽怯了…………
而且,他對我應該也沒那種意思……
每當產生這種念頭時,你的臉總是會浮現在眼前………彷彿在提醒我
「別傻了,妳不完美。」
是呀,我不完美…………我,是時候該放下了,放下這種念頭,我…依然無法忘記你………………
停留吧,至少不會再受傷了。
拋棄向前的想法和勇氣吧,那些都是多餘的。
我,只要停留在此地就行了。
誰叫我,是不完美的呢?
四.怯
我無法展開新的戀情。
因為,放不下妳。
最近出現在身邊的悅涵,有時會讓我想再嘗試一次,但妳的話卻無時無刻的出現在我耳邊
「你,糟透了。」
是呀,我糟透了,因為那個秘密,所以我不再是最初的那個我。
我,有時還是會想放下那些過去,向前走,嘗試新的戀情。
但,我是不完美的。
這個事實,把我所有的想法擊退,算了吧。我,沒那資格。
怯懦,將我拘禁在原地,囚禁在名為自卑的監牢。
Fine
ns 172.70.127.135da2