The last time Arya saw Ihsan he was angry with her. Standing before him now, her mask slips just a little before she offers him a smile he doesn’t return. Instead, his eyes slice to Malich. He opens his mouth to say something, but Arya won’t let him ruin things for Malich, so she speaks first. “King Rayne, it’s a pleasure to meet you again. Forgive us, but I’d like to have a word with his majesty,” Arya smiles to the other royals.
She loops her arm through Ihsan’s, while he and Malich exchange murderous glances at one another. Arya drags him into the palace away from prying eyes and ears. Malich, Navi and Evander follow close behind. Arya isn’t sure Ihsan even recognized Navi. His eyes were solely fixed on her.
The moment they are behind closed doors Ihsan begins scolding her. He doesn’t care who’s listening. “Is this some sort of joke? Queen? Did you invite me here to torture me or was that Malich’s idea?” He seethes.
“What?” Arya gasps, offended.
“You said we couldn’t be together because you were beneath my station and now you present yourself asQueen?”
Arya is so taken aback by his tone that it takes her a moment to realize what he’s referring to. “Actually, you were the one who said you couldn’t marry a lowborn,” she recalls.
“Yes, but I also said I’d be willing to make a concession for you.”
“A concession I didn’t want.”
“Obviously. Now I understand why. When were you going to tell me? Before or after you married someone else?”
Pinning him with a glare Arya spits, “I don’t owe you any explanation. I came to you for answers and I got them.”
“Before or after you let me share your bed?” He asks.
Several lights blow out and she clenches her eyes shut. She didn’t have to look at him to know the source of that power surge. She can still hear the crackling and sizzling of his electric currents as he tries and fails to keep his jealousy in check. A second gasp followed by a muffled cry catches Ihsan’s attention. His eyes slice over to Navi standing behind me and he freezes.
Evander excuses himself from the room but made sure to stand guard right outside the door. Tears his gaze from a sobbing Navi, Ihsan addresses Arya. “I love you. I’ve always loved you and I’ll never stop. This is your doing Arya. This is what you’ve done to me,” he pours his heart out to her.
Arya swallows hard. Malich’s currents are crackling wildly now, rising with his anger. “You’re supposed to marry Navi,” her voice breaks as tears form in her eyes. “She deserves you, not me.”
Turning to Navi Ihsan says, “I do love you and I owe you my life, but I’m in lovewith her. I’ve never hidden that fact from you because I knew if the time ever came I would choose her. I’ve told you as much.”
Navi nods. His words did nothing to stop the flow of tears falling from her eyes. “You promised you would come for me and you didn’t,” her voice trembles and breaks.
“I didn’t come for you because I’ve been busy. My kingdom won’t run itself and thanks to my uncle Ziba, I don’t have the luxury of making any mistakes.”
“Like me,” she surmises.
“Like chasing after a female when my kingdom is in shambles thanks to my mother who fell prey to my stepfathers charms. He’s cleaned out our coffers and weakened our economy.”
While Navi and Ihsan speak, Arya slowly slides her gaze to Malich. He holds her gaze for a moment before looking away. She tried to tell him, but he wouldn’t let her. He told her he didn’t want to know.
“I have resources I’d be willing to part ways with,” Malich interrupts their conversation.
Ihsan pulls his gaze from Navi to the man he despises. “I bet,” Ihsan scoffs. “Always the diplomat…always looking for a way to extend your kingdom and your cock. I would ask the cost, but I’m an expert where you’re versed so I’m pretty sure I already know what you want.”
“Arya,” Malich speaks without hesitation. “All I ask is that you walk away. Marry Navi. I’ll give her land, a title, a small fortune and resources. Whatever you need.”
Fury sparks behind Ihsan’s eyes. He looks around the room at everyone before returning his gaze to Malich. “You have some nerve to ask that of me. Had you not have pried us apart and broken her spirit she and I…we would be…”
“Together.” Arya finishes his sentence. It’s the undeniable truth. Ihsan hated him for it, Arya feels conflicted about it, and Malich wants to atone for it. “Had he not have done what he did, its true, we would be together. I wish it hadn’t happened because I do love you. And this…this is my fault. I should have been stronger for you. I should have torn the world apart for you as you have for me.”
“Why didn’t you?”
Arya opens her mouth to speak, but can’t. She doesn’t know why, she only knows she was afraid. “Fear,” she swallows hard.
Ihsan sighs. “Of the man you want to leave me for?”
“Yes.” She looks to Malich.
“And yet you’d leave me for him, still? Like you left me all those cycles ago, beaten and alone?” Ihsan’s voice breaks. “I love you. I never would have broke and I never would have given up.”
“I know.”
“Then why did you give up on me? On us?”
“He would’ve killed you,” tears fell from her eyes.
“So you gave up and gave him yourself instead? Forsaking me?”
Again she opens her mouth to speak, but no words come out. She retreats as the depths of what she’d done slowly sinks in. She gave up. She gave up and she gave in and she betrayed both their love and herself. Arya withdrew from the conversation and the world itself, diving deeper into herself. How could she let this happen? How could she allow him to break her and then bed her as if nothing ever happened, as if Ihsannever happened?
Malich’s desperate voice pulls her from her thoughts. “Walk away. I’ll make it worth your while, just…walkaway.”
“I can’t walk away any more than you can,” Ihsan seethes, “The difference is, she was mine before she was ever yours and my conscious, unlike yours, is clear.”
“Is it?” Navi gazes at him with painful eyes. “It’s true. Everything you said about her is true, but I love you. For many terms we’ve shared a bed together and you knewhow I felt. I didn’t hide those feelings from you. How can your conscious be clear when you are ripping out my heart?”
Ihsan grimaces at her words. He’s just as stubborn as Malich. Arya knows he loves her, but she owes Navi. Her life with Ihsan has to be the price because if Navi weren’t there to put him back together, neither of them would have him now.
“She was there to put you back together, not me. If it weren’t for her, you’d still be broken.”
“She gave me hope, I wont deny that, but you were my motivation Arya. You.”
Arya made such a mess of things that she wants this whole conversation to just go away. If she chose Malich, Ihsan would never stop coming for her. If she chose Ihsan, there’s no telling what Malich would do, but it wouldn’t be pretty. The only choice she had was to deny them both access to her heart and her bed.
“For what I did I’m an arsehole, but I won’t regret any of it,” Malich approaches Ihsan, electricity sparking to life and murderous intent in his eyes. “Judging from the sounds of things, not only do you need resources, but you need an ally. I can give you all of that as long as you keep your distance.”
“I don’t want your charity, I want what you took from me.” Ihsan hisses, squaring off against Malich.
“And I would love to give it back, but I can’t. I will not let her go, ever, but if you name your price, I’ll gladly pay it.”
Ihsan thinks long and hard, before he promptly decks Malich in the face as hard as he can, knocking out a tooth and splitting his lip. Malich falls backwards onto the floor, his nose a bloody mess. “That’s my godsdamned price,” Ihsan spit on him.
Electricity crackles and Arya expects Malich to strike back, but he doesn’t. Instead, he uses it to heal his wounds and replace his tooth. He wipes the spit off of his overcoat and holds out his hand for Ihsan to shake. Ihsan promptly decks him in the face again. Neither Arya nor Navi steps in to intercede. Malich tries several more times to be civil and each time Ihsan decks him in the face. He pulls out a dagger and holds it to Malich’s throat. “I should kill you,” Ihsan hisses.
“Do it,” Malich holds up his hands. “Anan knows I deserve it, so do it.”
With bated breath Arya waits, unable to move, frozen in fear. Ihsan wants to kill him, she can see it in his eyes, and Malich is resigned to his fate. She sighs with relief when Ihsan releases Malich instead, shoving him backwards. His eyes flicker to Navi and Arya sees remorse in them. “I don’t want anything from you, save her, what you took from me,” Ihsan points to Arya.
The two of them are at an impasse, both roads leading to Arya and neither of them willing to deter from their course. Done with the conversation, Ihsan takes Navi by the hand and leaves the room so they can talk alone.
Arya and Malich stand a few feet apart, gazing at one another. This can’t go on. Malich needs as many allies as he can get. They both did. She wishes they weren’t so divided, but Malich’s actions saw to that, just as his actions are responsible for the conundrum she now faces.
“Why would you invite him here?” She asks.
“He is the King of the Unseelie Court. It’s in my best interest, not to mention rudenot to.”
Politics, Arya gathers. She’s still learning how things work here. “About what he said, I…”
“I knew,” Malich grimaces and shakes the thought from his head. “I could see it in your eyes, the guilt and the shame.”
Arya exhales slowly. “Well tonight has been very eventful,” she deadpans.
“Choose me,” he pins her to the spot. “I know I don’t deserve you, not like he does, but I’m better when I’m with you. You make me want to be.”
“That’s a lot of pressure Malich. Don’t make me solely responsible for your happiness, it’s not fair to me.”
“You know me and you know how I was before. I was bitter, angry and alone.”
Arya nods. “You were.”
“I don’t want you to feel like you’re solely responsible for my happiness, but you area big part of it. More than you know or even realize.”
“Then give me time. Real time. Not time you command, my owntime.”
Malich bristles at her request. “How much time? How long?”
“As long as it takes.”
He slowly drags his eyes up the length of her body until he meets her gaze and inhales deeply. Reluctantly, he nods. “The night isn’t over yet. Keep your eyes open and your guard up,” he throws over his shoulder as he leaves the room.
Arya nods, following him out onto his terrace just in time for music. Malich motions for her to join him on the dance floor and she does. They practiced the dance for hours at her palace before sneaking off to whatever room they could find to boff their brains out undetected.
Malich showed more resolve than she was used to seeing. He did it for her, allowing Ihsan to strike him the way he did and repeatedly. It’s in that moment she realized exactly how deep his love for her goes. For a second time he was letting her go and she knew it was eating at him. As they sway to the musical melody of a cellist, he gazes into each her eyes, blocking out the world and savoring the moment.
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