After the visit to the cemetery, I decided I wanted to go home and talk to my mom about the letter I found. I hadn't talked to anyone about it and I wanted to discuss it with her before my session with Dr. Alder tomorrow. I wonder if she would tell me to find him, or stay here and just wonder what could have been.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQbOgsfCs4u
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I wasn't even sure what I wanted to do. In all honesty, I hadn't thought about the letter for awhile. It's not that I didn't want to, it's just that to me, there were more pressing matters at hand. Like the nightmares. Something told me they were just going to keep getting worse. And what if I had a dream about killing Jared, and then he's found dead?328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcqK64nB9z
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjWWz2eueB
Even though I'm not actually the one doing these things, it's terrifying to know that someone is. I feel like whoever it is, is trying to get to me, because they're murdering the people around me. First John, then Cassie. Who was next? That was the hardest thing to thing about. About who out of the people around me would be savagely killed, either shot, stabbed, or whatever else the killer chose to do to them.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwe04g7rBt
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These were the things I thought about as Jude drove me to my house. We didn't talk about Abbie, though I was curious, and we didn't talk about the kiss that never should have happened. We didn't talk about anything he turned down my road. Then he turned to me, his eyes serious.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRTd7gFrI1
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"Kendall." His voice was urgent now. "I have to tell you something."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPFJ9NZGSAz
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I looked at him. "If it's about the kiss, don't worry about it. I know it was wrong, that I shouldn't have done it. I have a boyfriend."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkBgkwE4lD
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQX5wSDi1YW
Jude scoffed. "Right. A boyfriend who just pushes you away and leaves you standing alone in an empty school parking lot. Tell me, have you heard from him since then?"328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbJrLvbHwE
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2p6AWLp0IQ
"Well no."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstTEkTwSgQ
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"Exactly. But that isn't what I wanted to talk about."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItOAdsUj14
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"Can it wait?" I asked as we pulled closer to my house. I opened the door and looked back at him.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡth7UXyFs6W
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"No," he said, shaking his head. He reached over and cupped my cheek. "It wasn't supposed to be like this," he murmured, more to himself than me. "It was just fucking business, I was not supposed to get attached."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYeZhjcYA28
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4KE6ZbszeC
I blinked, removed his hand, and said, "What's going on?"328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu8NVbIVXMZ
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"Do you think it was by luck that I began talking to you? I wish it was. I wish I wasn't in this shitty situation, but I am, and I'm about to make it worse."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbnRQSQOff
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"What are you talking about?"328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyAHD9tugn
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The fact that he couldn't even look at me hurt. Slowly, I grasped his hand and held it tightly.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2QJQFnxom
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"You can tell me anything, you know. I'm not going to judge you."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuKKNR5XV1
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuh2rxDdFW
He looked at me and smiled. The smile was all wrong. It wasn't warm or caring, but like he knew whatever he had to tell me I wasn't going to like. That maybe I would hate it. Maybe I would hate him. I didn't think that last part was possible.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6OnwhnQIqJ
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtJ7sAfffCk
"I was paid a lot of money to befriend you, Kendall. I was supposed to get information about you for someone. I don't even really know who the guy is, but anyway, I don't want to do it anymore. I care about you and I'm not willing to ruin what I have with you for a few bucks."328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifAABdg57B
328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsKu9UQth7M
I couldn't believe what he was telling me. I was so mad that I started to tremble. Every part of me wanted to hit him. When I spoke, my voice was chipped, bitter.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0ci4PBvFN
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"How much money?"328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTCY9zwNZs
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"Excuse me?" Jude said. He stammered a little when he said it. He wasn't expecting that question.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUsaSaZINy
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"How much money were you offered to put up a false friendship? How much was my agony worth to you?" I glared at him. "How fucking much?" I slammed my foot into the dashboard of his car, breaking the glove compartment open. Papers fluttered out and I heard him make a noise, then I looked down.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4gJGLt6TN
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My face, all different angles and views, stared up at me.328Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYx1K1rG9RT