"Ms. Hendricks, will you please come sit down over here?" the officer asked.
"No."
"Why not?"
"Someone was too busy not trusting her friend's willpower to lock up my damned shop. I'm watching for thieves."
"Ma'm, I don't think that is important right now."
"Oh, I'm sorry, sir. Have you ever been raped? No? Then you can shut your fucking mouth about what's important." Lisa returned her eyes to the screen. "That's my whole life in that shop. The only thing in my life I ever set out to do and actually fucking managed to do."
Danielle walked over to her and sat down on the chair. "I'll watch it. Go tell them what happened."
"This is why you don't get your own keys. You never remember to lock up."
"I'm sorry, Leese. I just thought you'd..."
"I what? You thought I was too weak? That's it, right? That's what you've always thought about me."
Danielle didn't refute the accusation. Instead she held Lisa's hand and said, "I was wrong. I'm sorry."
Lisa got up from her chair and said, "If I go to jail, you're bringing me cupcakes every single fucking day." She walked over to the couch and sat down.
"Ms. Hendrick-"
"Lisa."
The officer took a breath, "Lisa. I'm officer Mackey."
"Mmkay."
"Pardon?"
"Mackey? Mmkay?"
The officer stared at her.
"Am I the first one to make that joke to you ever?"
"What joke?"
Lisa blinked a few times, "Okay."
"Can you walk me through what happened?"
"I woke up this morning and when I went to the living room, Rick was in here. He'd broken in."
"There's no sign of forced entry."
"I asked him how he got in. He said he was watching when Danielle left this morning and saw her stick the key under the mat."
"Oh, Leese! I'm so sorry!" Danielle stood from her chair.
"Less talking, more screen watching," she said, then turned to Danielle. "Please? You know how important my parlor is to me."
She nodded and sat back down.
"What happened after that?" Mackey asked.
"He told me he wanted to get back together."
"You two were broken up?"
She nodded, "After all the cheating and the beatings, yeah. Shouldn't you have records of that stuff?"
He nodded, "I'll have them pull the files."
"He tried to give me some heroin. He got the needle ready for me and held it out. I told him I didn't do that anymore, so he slapped me," she turned her head to show the bruise that was forming. "Then he held me down and..." she sighed. "I tried to resist him but you can see how big he is. The last thing I could think to do was stab him. And the needle was the closest thing."
"Why did you stab him so many times?"
Danielle stood again, "He was fucking raping her! And you want to know why she wasn't more gentle in her self defense?"
The officer sighed and sat down in front of Lisa. "Look. You, and your friend, seem to be under the mistaken impression that I'm trying to fish for something other than a rape. And I don't blame you. That's how most of my coworkers are. I'm not. I believe you. But that's why I need the facts."
Lisa smiled weakly, "Okay." She stifled a wider smirk as she imagined Mr. Mackey's voice coming out of the officer's mouth and saying, "Rape is bad, mmkay?"
At first she wasn't sure why she wasn't more distraught over what had happened. It wasn't that she wasn't upset. And everything that had transpired in the bathroom after was definitely the act of someone upset. She realized that, plain and simple, she was seeping with joy that Rick was dead. And that she'd done it. This joy was outweighing the trauma that was surely lurking under the surface.
"So as I said, why did you stab him so many times?"
"He kept moving after the first time. I'm sorry to reduce this to such simple terms, but there's no world in which he doesn't kill me after that."
The officer nodded, "Assuming your statements of his abusive history check out, and I'm certain they will, then yeah. Now what did you do next?"
"I ran to the bathroom. I puked, then took a morning after pill and showered."
"Morning after pill? He had ejaculated?"
She nodded, "Rick wasn't known for his stamina. And I'd spent some time trying to pull away from him before grabbing the needle."
"When was the last time you did heroin?"
"Two years ago," she held out her arms. "Doctor told me the marks should be gone, but you can still kinda see them. I hate that."
He nodded, "Makes sense with your complexion. There are creams that can help."
She crossed her arms and looked down. Officer Mackey then said something that took her by surprise.
"Took three years for mine to fade."
She looked up at him and smiled. A glance at his left hand showed a wedding ring. Romance was the last thing on her mind, but that check had become a habit of hers. And she'd discovered the merit of the old saying; the good ones are always taken. Well, except Calvin. She really wanted to see him. She knew he'd be there for her. So what if he wasn't real? Real was the last thing she needed right now.
"I want you to understand that this is just a formality," the officer said, "but will you consent to a drug test?"
Lisa nodded. She wasn't offended by the request. She knew how similar her situation looked to the story someone would make up after a drug deal gone wrong.
"I think it would be in your best interest if you left for a while. It'll take a bit for us to finish up here. Do you have somewhere you can stay?"
Before Lisa could even turn around to ask, Danielle said, "Yes, she does."
Lisa thanked her and went to her room to pack a bag. The officer gave her a number to call, as well as a card for a rape counselor. She got into Danielle's car and they headed off.
For about five minutes, Lisa said nothing. She only stared out the window. She finally broke the silence, "Do you hate me?"
"For what?"
"Letting him into my life so many times? Being so obsessed with finding someone again when it's clear that I can't choose a good guy to save my life?"
"No, sweetheart. I don't hate you."
"I lied to the cop."
There was a pause, and Danielle said, "About what?"60Please respect copyright.PENANAMDMK7Crv67
"Rick didn't prepare the heroin for me. Or rape me. He sat the bag on the table and I was tearing through it and preparing it with so much...fervor that I didn't even care that he'd started fucking me. Then I saw our graduation photo. I didn't tell the cop what I'm about to tell you because I know it won't fly in court. But I knew. I knew that there was no way I could stop him. I knew that if I didn't make him think I'd injected, he would have grabbed the needle and injected me himself. So I waited until I had an opening, then when he was in the middle of coming, I stabbed him."
Danielle nodded, "You're right. That wouldn't fly. But rape culture means you could have literal video of him raping you and people would hymn and haw about it. But you didn't do anything wrong, Leese. And what he did was rape. He coerced you with a demon he knew would control you."
"Where are we going? This isn't the way to your house."
"Oh, I forgot to say. I may have forgotten to lock up the parlor."
Lisa laughed despite herself and put her head against the window again, "Can you play some of Calvin's music for me?"
"Poets?"
She nodded, then sighed, "Rick broke my phone when I tried to call the cops."
Danielle smiled, "then I have an excuse to get you the new model."
She put some music on, and after a while Lisa dozed off to a voice calling out, Sleep sugar, let your dreams flood in. Like waves of sweet fire, you're safe within. Sleep sweetie, let your floods come rushing in and carry you over to a new morning.
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