I woke up at eleven in the morning, had breakfast and left for home. The drive back was easier, mostly because I was so excited to see Damien after three days.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeyiUkHGKR
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I was planning on going home, do laundry and find Cleo. I wanted to try and talk to her one more time. We were best friends since we were babies, her opinion meant the world to me and I wanted to be clear about that; even if she haven’t contacted me at all since I left town.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaBNFM8uASt
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As soon as I arrived I went towards my parents kitchen; not even bothering going into my garage.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHF1hEaItmL
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“Hello,” I greeted my mom as I entered the kitchen from the back door.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFVNb67cmoT
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“Welcome home baby,” mom replied “How are you?”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGDtZ5cXFSY
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“Fine, you?” I smiled and left my bag on the floor.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPfBlIlMiU
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“Got dirty clothes?”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMjkACB6mw
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“Yup,” I grinned “Why aren’t you at the office?”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2mqwfP4W5
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“Have to visit a client in a bit,” she explained and narrowed her eyes when she noticed I was smiling at her. “Don’t look at me like that, do laundry yourself.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLQSfdcdUm
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“Fine,” I groaned and I retrieved my bag before walking towards her. I kissed her cheek as I passed her by and exited the kitchen. I turned right and entered the laundry room. I left the bag on the ground once again and took my mobile out of my back pocket. I dialed Damien’s number and put it on speaker phone. His phone was disconnected. I put the phone back into my pocket thinking he must be at work.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHXeB4hurQP
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After putting all my clothes into the washing machine I sat in the kitchen with my mom until she left for work. I tried calling Damien again and like earlier his phone was disconnected. I sat into my parent’s living room to watch some television, though I should probably be into my garage and try and study.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6RocvG6Nc
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I dialed Max’s number and put the phone on speaker. It took three rings before he picked up.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvy5FuWEsge
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“Hey,” he breathed, sounding weird.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvUj9g2007
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“Hello to you too,” I frowned a little bit “Are you okay?” I asked referring to his weird greeting.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQRfhNVlqk
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“I’m okay, how are you?” he asked, still sounding weird.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZ8VvONvgA
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“Fine,” I replied “Where are you? I’m home!” I smiled. He didn’t reply for a moment.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8LO71HrOq8
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“Fuck,” he mumbled “Dude, I’m gonna have to call you back,” he said; the word rushing out of his mouth.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9spxVatZVb
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvY3aHGkFUe
“Okay, don’t be late because I’m so bored!” I replied and hung up. I wanted to call Cleo but something stopped me. So I texted her instead. “I’m back home, if you want a coffee.” I remained on that couch until three o’clock in the afternoon when Max finally called me.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUCXZkel7x
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“Hey, “ he breathed “Offer still stands?” he asked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfh0ixMDv1F
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“Of course,” I replied “Come over!”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPNi8f0bKs
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Max turned up soon afterwards. He said Cleo was trying to finish a project that she working on since I left. She was trying to keep herself occupied as I understood.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwddJdfnHIw
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He told me she had a date with Mike two nights ago and that she looked very optimistic. It looked like Max was trying to avoid mentioning Damien, so I left it at that, doing the very same thing but not really understanding the reason.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kayDGiYcX
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About an hour later, that I still haven’t heard from Damien, my mom returned home. I refused to cook for myself because I was cooking the whole time I was living with James, so her arrival made me extra happy.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNcHh0y9OiP
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I was sitting with Max in the kitchen sofa playing cards until the food was ready. Thankfully mom had prepared the meat and now I only had to wait half an hour until it was grilled. At some point I heard mom talking on the phone, telling someone to bring a soda for us. A while later Evita, the twin’s mother, walked through the kitchen door.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRx2wSDDDN2
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“Hello guys,” she greeted us “Welcome Erica.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQuaklujR1
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“Hello Aunt,” I smiled and got up to take the soda that she put on the kitchen counter. “How are you?” I smiled.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKOdjMcbim
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“Here,” my mom said at the same time and left some money on the counter.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pUFnGgDzo
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBdahug87eM
“Don’t even think about it,” Evita replied to her. “I’m still trying to digest the fact that my baby left again,” she sighed.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrIapSJ5oUk
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“Which baby left?” I frowned with a half smile as I walked towards the cupboard with the glasses. Max was here. Cleo was at home. That only left one person that could leave…435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IfgCG6y7O
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZlobQxT7X
“Damien,” and a deep sigh escaped her chest the same time the realization hit me. My heart fell. I blinked; staring at the shelves. My chest started going up and down quickly as my heartbeat increased. I swallowed the lump in my throat and took one glass in my hands.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOFDW88783D
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“Wasn’t he supposed to leave in two weeks?” I asked trying to sound as casual as possible. I took another glass out of the cupboard and opened up the soda bottle.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRya9gzgAcZ
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKePV71yDkx
“Yeah,” Evita said “But he said he got a call this morning at work from some friends and he’s meeting them in Rome before going in Tuscany,” she explained. I felt a strong pain in my chest as I tried to keep the tears back.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSk2ga00Avk
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“That’s nice,” I noted and put the soda into the fridge; never turning my head towards Evita or my mom. I wanted to keep my expression hidden because I didn’t even know how I looked like.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNle31SxhFj
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“You kids should go and visit, using those tickets he got you for your birthday,” she suggested as I was walking towards Max.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrieLKHCup
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“Maybe after their exams,” my mom spoke. I put the soda on the table in front of Max, never looking at him.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRgUQpQsIiv
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“Yeah, after the exams,” I replied and sat down with my back towards the kitchen. I didn’t care if Max saw me crying, but I didn’t want Evita to see me. I took a deep breath and focused on my cards.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgmDUF3tjm0
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“Your turn,” I said to Max. He didn’t move for a moment.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMbvW88ZbH
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“Yeah,” he breathed after a while and put a card down. I sipped my soda and took a deep breath. I couldn’t stop staring at my phone. We haven’t even finished the game when I grabbed it from the table and dialed Damien’s number.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOtXKYgQtA
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Nothing. His phone was disconnected. My breathing started to increase and I leaned forward, touching my elbows on my knees, as I tried to calm myself down. “Why would he leave like that? Things were fine last night” I was thinking over and over again.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzETftqaOEb
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My mom approached us then, holding two plates with grilled chicken and left them on the table. I thanked her, not really talking, and pulled the plate in front of me.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNq4qIxgda9
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Max closed the door behind us as we walked into the renovated garage. I took small steps towards the bed and sat down; my chest aching.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVvRCOKb1Z
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“Did he…” I breathed “Did he really left?” I frowned looking at Max for the first time.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4106plkHS
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“Fuck,” he mumbled and leaned against the door “You didn’t know. He said everything’s okay,” Max frowned.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMaOZke4GXi
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“When did he say that?” I asked; my voice fainted.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFXdTl80g1b
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“He woke me up this morning,” Max breathed and took a step from the door “And said he’s leaving. I asked where he’s going because I got confused because I knew he went into the office this morning and he said that he got a call from a friend and that he’s meeting his old buddies in Rome before going up to Tuscany,” Max explained like he knew I needed to hear the story one more time.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINRAgPNmo5
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He walked towards me as he spoke again “I followed him to the door and I asked if you knew about this,” he said and finally sat down beside me. I swallowed. “He said “everything’s okay kid”, hugged me, hugged Cleo and left,” he breathed.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTEfXQ0EzIr
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I couldn’t speak. Everything was fine last night. He was excited that I was finally coming back home. What could possibly change overnight? Or if nothing changed, and everything was okay why he left without calling or texting? Or at least answering his phone?435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvnUy3KIqgG
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“I…” I stuttered “We spoke last night…” I breathed. “I don’t understand,” I whispered and pulled back on the bed, pulling my legs against my chest. Max turned towards me and put his hand on my ankle; stroking my skin with his thumb.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZWH6OwHW7
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“I’ll talk to him. He’ll call sooner or later,” he said.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbphDg0PeQ
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“No, no,” I rapidly shook my head.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43qZV5nwW1
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“Why not?” Max frowned.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0VcQ1qvBB
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“Don’t get involved please,” I shook my head again but slowly this time.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmezpO1BTzN
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“I wanna know too,” he blinked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGKKrTTlLqp
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“Please don’t. For the past two months I’ve been trying to keep this casual, like I wasn’t dating your brother. You getting involved will cancel all that out,” I explained.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhJMXtuZ4U
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The truth was that I was afraid. I didn’t want him to feel pressure about anything. If his brother got involved he would probably feel pressured and that would pushed him further away from me. If it was possible to be further apart.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKopYJo94pm
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I should have left. I should have taken the chance to go away for university. Then none of this would have happened. Even if I have taken up on Alex’s offer. I wouldn’t have stayed and Alex wouldn’t have broken my heart and most importantly I wouldn’t be around to fall in love with Damien once again.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1j2qyIW6PQ
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ49F6LVSUfg
It hurt so badly. What I was feeling now was nothing compared to how I felt when Alex cheated or when we broke up. My heart was shuttered into a million little pieces inside my chest and everytime I had a thought of him it was like those little pieces cut through my flesh; burning my insides and killing me even more in the process.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECsUDghbEV
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I even made my mother cry when she came to check on me that day. And it hurt more. I was avoiding the mirrors because I didn’t want to see how I looked like. The way I felt was enough.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjmK86BNPLG
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There were moments that I couldn’t understand why he would leave like this. Moments that I was going insane, running our last conversations over and over and over again into my mind trying to find what went wrong. And I would pick up the phone and dial his number.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqCsmqpWPV
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He never answered; even if the phone was now working, two days after he left. And why would he? We didn’t belong together. I wasn’t enough. Why would he stay with me? It was a miracle we even had those two months together. I should be happy I had those two months. I should be happy I got to taste his bittersweet lips, stare into his mesmerizing grey eyes. Deep down I was glad I never got to tell him how I really felt because he would probably laugh.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYHKGjVt1E
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But what about all those times he held me into his arms and stared into my eyes? The times when he wanted me to say I was his. Why would he do that if he never cared? Or when he assured me that he would never cheat on me. Why would he do that? He knew I hated big words. He knew I hated promises and yet he would say those things.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfwVDhtp0hh
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Every time the phone rang my heart fluttered. But it was never him and the soft pain in my chest returned again. Max was calling regularly to check on me; trying to get me out of the house. Cleo had texted me, asking if I was okay but I wasn’t ready for her or the outside world yet.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhWnNJETXyy
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Only the third day I got up from the bed and opened my laptop, trying to slowly have a connection with the outside world. Yesterday and the day before that my mother came home from work to cook and bring me food; that only made me feel more pathetic but I never argued.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GAwLeppvg
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After I was done eating and I was ready to sit on the couch and ignore the world around me, including my examinations, my phone rang. My heart fluttered but fell when I saw that it wasn’t him. It was Alex. I had completely forgotten about him.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡntQlilylZb
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“Hello,” I answered; my voice completely lifeless.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqi6TUIKVmK
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“Hello,” he said slowly and I could hear the frown on his features “Are you okay?” he asked, sounding anxious. I breathed sharply.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3AkRXM7dx
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“Yes,” I lied automatically.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTL50gug3zl
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“I thought that by now you’d know better than to lie to me, love,” he said softly.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrQzsPJigNH
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“I’m not in the mood Alex,” I replied; the impatience coloring my voice.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkaGW0Utg1u
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“I’m coming to pick you up,” he said but by the time I refused he had already hung up the phone.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9SaBn8oHA
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He arrived sooner than expected; right when I was done getting ready. Not that I made an effort. I just put on a pair of jeans and a simple black top. Thankfully it was daytime and I could hide my red puffy eyes under my black sunglasses.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLmq84I833
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I greeted him heartlessly as I sat beside him in the black Aston Martin. He breathed a greeting back and never spoke again until we were at the mansion.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ld4NwILIb
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“When did you arrived?” I asked as we got out of the car.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVePhilBpV
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“This morning,” he replied as he walked beside me towards the double doors of the entrance. “How did you know?” he smiled.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3faPRM33Hy
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaAXn6CAVW
“You came too fast,” I made an attempt to smile but failed. Smiling felt strange. He looked at me for a moment and then turned around, opening the door and walked inside.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0NY7nRlbFx
435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cbvPj10XO
I never thought that I could talk to Alex so freely about what I felt. Maybe it was because when we were together it was the only thing I never wanted to do. But I didn’t care anymore. I knew he wouldn’t judge me for having feelings for Damien.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hLuldMg4k
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When, at some point, I burst into tears he pulled me into his arms and held me there. And as he kept me I realized that maybe I shouldn’t have talk to him at all. Three days ago our positions were reversed, maybe it was selfish talking to him; after all he had his own problems to deal with. I pulled back and wiped the tears from my eyes.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXX6sLXRnWz
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“Are you okay?” he asked softly.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzu6fpJLn0I
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“I’m better, thank you,” I swallowed and pushed my fist against my chest, trying to ease the pain. “How are you?” I looked at him, trying to keep my mind occupied. I saw him looking at my hand that was against my chest before looking at my eyes.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Zzu5OKK5p
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“I’m better too,” he smiled.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2i8D9UjIlc
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“Have you gone to the cemetery?” I asked. He turned forward and looked at the floor, brushing his face with his fingers.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡctHhDWIMLW
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“No.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESDbv3LkF7
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“We’re gonna go together,” I told him “I’ll be there with you,” I assured him. He breathed and nodded. “What about your father? Have you talked to him?”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmggQ074x6n
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“No,” he said his expression hardening “My father and I don’t talk.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDPN9yqpop
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“Well, he’ll notice when you’re better and everything will be okay,” I told him and took his hand in mine. He turned towards me and looked at me; his brown eyes liquid.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GQ0wTZcIu
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“I admire you for being able to do that,” he mumbled.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9N5vK8qq1
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“Do what?” I blinked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuFIZ5Ep2T
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“Be so strong.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzTKHntY0To
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“There’s no strength left in me,” I whispered, shaking my head lightly and looked at the floor.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVy2dFEf63e
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“Hey,” he said and searched for my eyes. I turned to look at him before he spoke again. “You’ll get over this,” he said sounding confident.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLjv2AXS2A
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“I can’t,” I winced and my tears betrayed me once again. I turned my head away from him and tried to wipe the tears away.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjlFJ0Ixdwb
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“Come here,” I heard him saying right before he pulled me to his arms again. He put his palm against the side of my head as my cheek was laying against his collar bone. “Calm down,” he whispered and a déjà vu hit me; Damien holding me as I was crying over Alex. I pulled away abruptly from him as my breathing fastened and the pain in my chest hardened.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1VCjUomKs
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“I’m sorry,” I breathed. Alex looked at me shocked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnZKBXWC1B
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“What?” he asked confused “About what?” he frowned and I got up.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgeugebHrC0
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“It’s my fault. Everything’s my fault,” I mumbled as the air filled my lungs quickly; my chest going up and down rapidly. “Four months ago he was the one holding me,” I begun talking quickly and started hyperventilating “As I was crying over you. Now it’s happening again but in reverse. It’s me. I keep doing this,” I rambled, tears oozing from eyes.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDOYnQUSTvL
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I was doing this. Alex was never the right guy for me and maybe neither was Damien. Maybe that’s why it hurt so bad, because I wanted him to be that guy so bad. My chest was going up and down quickly and aching. I didn’t noticed Alex moving, until he was standing in front of me.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkomsBmbfVy
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“Erica, calm down,” he said, putting his palms against my cheeks and looking at me. I bit my bottom lip trying to calm down with no success. Everything was great before he kissed me that day in the swimming pool for the first time. Why would he do that? I was fine before. I was fine just imagining that kiss, imagining him looking into my eyes with care. I was fine before.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSM80Y2gxPO
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But I was glad I lived it. Grateful that I was free to caress his beautiful face and that I saw the way he looked and smelled after sex. I was thankful even if now my insides were aching and burning like a demon’s flesh that’s being touched by holy water. I breathed out a whimper and put my palm against the center of my chest.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlggXcrmAL2
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“It’s the same thing isn’t?” he asked; looking at me. I just stared at him. “Let’s go,” he said and grabbed my hand.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUWl5nOhHQ
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“Where?” I asked breathlessly.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGEVGWrt6cy
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“To the hospital,” he said; his voice colored with his intimidating tone.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZDwoCUPgV
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The ride towards the hospital helped a little bit, mostly because Alex had my window wide open. If I cared the slightest about myself at that point, I would be worried about getting pneumonia.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkDUJTkqrM6
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At some point I heard him talking on the phone to one or two people but I didn’t pay attention. I was just glad that he didn’t know the twins or my parent’s number. Or at least I hoped he didn’t. I was too lost in my trance to worry about that. My mind was spinning and I had lain back enjoying the ride.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTREJhZ73DS
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Only when we walked into the Emergency Room I became aware of what was really happening. The pain in my chest wasn’t so bad anymore but I still felt something. Maybe it was my heart that was ripped out.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQ7VoTZouA
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I guessed that the phone calls that Alex made as he drove me to the hospital were to a doctor because we didn’t have to wait at all. A doctor led the way towards one of the beds and told me to sit down. When he asked how I felt I was very tempted to say that it felt like I was hit by a truck but I thought it would be better to avoid my bitter humor.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1CUt2MeR9
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“Does it still hurt?” he asked as he took my pressure. Alex was standing on the end of the bed, his one arm against his chest and the other over it as his fingers were tracing his mouth; the whole time staring at me.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsu9s87qMEQ
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“No,” I replied “But it tickles,” I frowned not sure if that was the right word to describe the feeling.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDnTvUkmdT
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“Mr. White, can you please pull the curtains close?” he asked Alex and then turned towards me. “Lift your shirt please, I need to listen to your heart,” he told me. I nodded not even thinking that Alex was there.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡln23LvZ4iT
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“Do you want me to …” Alex told me, pointing outside. I shook my head politely. It wasn’t like he would see anything he hasn’t seen before. That thought brought a scoff to my lips that I chocked as the doctor place the stethoscope to my chest and then my heart rate increased again.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYu46BfLgiq
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“Take another deep breath please,” he told me and I noticed a light frown. My sight blurred for a moment but then I controlled myself and did what the doctor asked. “Okay, turn around,” he asked and I turned towards Alex; my top still upwards. I blinked to control the tears and gave a weak smile to Alex. “Okay,” the doctor exhaled and removed the stethoscope. I pulled down my top and turned towards him again.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡADXbOJu9js
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“You just had an anxiety attack,” he looked at me.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIYbCoMH5BF
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“But I’m not anxious about anything,” I frowned. I didn’t give damn about my classes at this point.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTShYRQBNBA
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“From your symptoms, pounding heart, shortness of breath, hyperventilation and insomnia I can come up with one answer and that is anxiety attack,” he begun. “But I can say that grieving can also be a cause. Grieving is a powerful emotion that can have physical effects on our autonomic system and can even cause arrhythmias or bursting of weakened blood vessels,” the doctor explained. I wasn’t surprised he thought of “grief”; my red eyes were one of my symptoms.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL8h7RMkzue
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“Oh,” was all I managed to say. “What can I do?” I asked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1vwcYkTTX
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“Because this have happened again in the past, I’m going to prescribe something to just calm you down,” he said.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ85nwu1bI9E
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“Anti-depression drugs?” Alex asked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFbF8wVS70
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“What?” I frowned “No,” I turned towards the doctor as I realized what drugs he meant. “I have my exams to study for,”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqiWMbwPiND
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“Alright, take one before you go to sleep for two nights in the row. It will help you sleep and rest. Then take them if you start having any symptoms again, okay?” the doctor smiled and wrote something on a paper and left it. “Though I don’t think it will happen again soon.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgw1IqQqv4m
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“Thank you Dr. Wallace,” Alex said as I nodded. The doctor smiled at him and shook his hand before leaving us alone. I exhaled deeply and got up from the bed. Alex walked next to me, his hand on the back of my waist as we exited the hospital.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVsozScsVo
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“That was interesting,” I smiled as approached the car. “Many people have been dumped before but how many were they diagnosed?” I laughed.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhGtPRHEIx6
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“I need to know that you’ll be okay,” Alex told me as he sat opened the passengers door for me.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0zwYIh2kV
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“I’ll try,” I mumbled.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLuzUTWxMej
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The next two days I did sleep well thanks to the drugs the doctor gave me but the third night was as the same as the first night I learned Damien left. I tossed and turned, curling up into a ball. I tried to avoid taking a pill again because I’ve heard that you can get addicted to anti-depressing’s.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojDevYcHgg
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I wanted to hear his voice so bad; to hear that everything was okay. And I made the mistake to pick up my phone and call him; because this time he picked up. My heart almost exploded.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgv6j9iGtAw
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“What?” he asked so abruptly that made my heart shutter into a million pieces.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOLulQLqf2
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“Hi,” I breathed.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPtK4fBVkZ
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“What the hell Erica?” he asked. I never thought it would hurt this bad to hear him calling my name “It’s four o’clock in the morning!” he replied; his tone cold and distant.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgF4pMTyMKp
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“I’m sorry,” I whispered “I just needed to hear your voice,” I swallowed hard.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDF5BL47aR
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“So what?”he breathed out. He sounded like he was struggling too but it still hurt so badly. Tears filled my eyes and I hung up the phone before throwing it at the end of the bed. I wasn’t ready for this. I fell against my pillow, covering my face and smothered the sound of my sobs.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6DxadSwCL1
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And that’s when it happened again; the pounding pain returned to my chest. I sat up trying to calm down and looked at my phone, thought of calling Alex but I didn’t want to wake him up. So I stood up and walked into the shower. But again, tears came out of nowhere. I couldn’t calm myself down. I wrapped my towel around my body, between sobs, and walked into the room again.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY9zZ7TdkUE
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“Yes?” Alex answered his phone sleepily.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzrLHN7ZB7
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“I’m sorry,” I said softly “I…” I trailed. And that’s when Alex must have realized it was me on the phone.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPwmazfIXP
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“Are you okay?” he asked anxiously.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvVeiK95rqv
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“I don’t know,” I whispered but my breathing was still quick.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAqLC8pAJW
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“It happened again?”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpL9ebUr44R
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“Yes,” I breathed.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwjH4MzV9t
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“Get dressed.” He said and hung up the phone; not even giving me the chance to argue with him.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGkeKfWfb1
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This time the doctor that examined me thought it was best to keep me in. He said that it was suspicious for a girl my age to get those episodes so regularly. I tried to delay notifying my mother as much as possible as I didn’t want to scare her. I was lying in a bed, with stickers against my chest and my heart beat was beeping through a machine for the entire room to hear.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9V5xUlIhe
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“You need to call your mother,” Alex said from the foot of the bed. I studied him for a moment and noticed that I never saw him dressed so casual and I frowned.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCjro1zyQL
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“You’re not wearing a button up shirt,” I stated. He chuckled and shook his head.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Wq1EvgLNc
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“Yeah, sorry,” he smiled “I didn’t have time for a formal outfit,” he mocked.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4B6xEi08AH
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“Thank you for coming,” I smiled at him. He looked at me for a moment and then sat down at the end of the bed; exhaling deeply.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1s7OelrTwP
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“Three days ago, when you’re having that episode, you said something,” he begun “You said that you keep doing this to yourself,” he said. I felt uncomfortable and the beeping sound on the machine picked up. He looked at the machine for a second and then took my hand in his. I swallowed waiting to hear what he would say next. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time,” he sighed.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmt83h3ErCo
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“What? You’ve lost me,” I frowned.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8kwHE5CO9v
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“If we haven’t met that night, you wouldn’t be in here now,” he explained but I was still lost.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwnMq9tCWo8
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“Alex, what are you talking about?”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG2mopeHzZp
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“I’ve been thinking about this since that night at the club you had the first episode,” he explained and that’s when I realized what he was talking about. That night when we were out together after the second time we got together. I couldn’t breathe inside the club and accidentally told him this was happening often since he left.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOdwS950AR
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“Oh my God,” I frowned “This isn’t your fault,” I breathed and tried to sit up.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqw4UtHlSL
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“Stay down,” he said and stopped me from getting up “This is my fault. I damaged you so badly and he…” he trailed. The thought of Damien brought a sharp pain into my chest that made me ignore what he said.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡch3bWXWHno
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“He broke me,” I smiled a humorless smile; the machine giving me in. Alex looked towards it and stood up.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21ljg9cQ6G
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“Damn it, I shouldn’t have brought this up now,” he frowned. “Here,” he said and gave me my phone “Call your mother. It’s seven a.m.”435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrQ91bQX158
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I looked at him and sighed. It was best to hear it from me that I was in the hospital; to see that it wasn’t anything serious. Or at least I hoped it wasn’t.435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZv9zfDeFIX
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Conjure One - Tears From the Moon435Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCTehMKEOD
