天亮,上班。651Please respect copyright.PENANApasj7rPx9F
651Please respect copyright.PENANAcWcwZE4a8R
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。651Please respect copyright.PENANAdgX3yJ9ND1
651Please respect copyright.PENANAKzOjeKutrT
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。651Please respect copyright.PENANAF0E36ld8kZ
651Please respect copyright.PENANAcOuuDrAPcZ
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。651Please respect copyright.PENANAA3OVJURb55
651Please respect copyright.PENANA60QWZzcBuK
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。651Please respect copyright.PENANAU2ZEOvr3ug
651Please respect copyright.PENANA6bPHgoEVOo
看不見,罷。
天黑,下班。651Please respect copyright.PENANARgUr7IiRSQ
651Please respect copyright.PENANALGOMIpxIAR
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。651Please respect copyright.PENANAMd00F4sb1r
651Please respect copyright.PENANAaWToQ6XX9E
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。651Please respect copyright.PENANAptzZ9Cq0wZ
651Please respect copyright.PENANA5VUdClDY6U
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……651Please respect copyright.PENANAe7m5VzdON8
651Please respect copyright.PENANAjm1IbXWObf
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。651Please respect copyright.PENANAF3ZCW1FsHZ
651Please respect copyright.PENANAo6SMqQ43ip
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」651Please respect copyright.PENANAw5H6aiv5j4
651Please respect copyright.PENANAF2rU7OBE3w
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。
公司,午飯時間。651Please respect copyright.PENANA6Jrrnhz4aO
651Please respect copyright.PENANAzChobk13Mv
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……651Please respect copyright.PENANAuzZpYOwQsz
651Please respect copyright.PENANAhQ4sO4xWFN
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?651Please respect copyright.PENANAbM6sa5DE1X
651Please respect copyright.PENANAHBvlZD2t3j
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。651Please respect copyright.PENANAPAAIrzSKbW
651Please respect copyright.PENANAxZdIFRAkUS
還是……651Please respect copyright.PENANApjc5fa5QE7
651Please respect copyright.PENANAsBfVDh46pW
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!
公司,工作。651Please respect copyright.PENANAdNcBV47T9m
651Please respect copyright.PENANA9abn5NoQf1
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。651Please respect copyright.PENANAUjYtFCPAQo
651Please respect copyright.PENANAMyHzmZ3BV7
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。651Please respect copyright.PENANAdoxrtgf3lK
651Please respect copyright.PENANAjMKD6UpIJq
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。651Please respect copyright.PENANA0WqjEc9b88
651Please respect copyright.PENANAGgjD6kYaCy
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。651Please respect copyright.PENANAyDAF995wd8
651Please respect copyright.PENANAPSWERxx2hM
快意,笑了。
酒吧,喝酒。651Please respect copyright.PENANAhLWUO4BJw7
651Please respect copyright.PENANA5p1cYgeaK0
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。651Please respect copyright.PENANAvAtfssrYSu
651Please respect copyright.PENANAZi7ntr9evI
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。651Please respect copyright.PENANAA0szMBOHpJ
651Please respect copyright.PENANADPW27G5Ybg
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。651Please respect copyright.PENANAuUvDENah5O
651Please respect copyright.PENANAgto6P1VUiV
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。651Please respect copyright.PENANAN2QiLXzchB
651Please respect copyright.PENANAinaCPbEuhA
醉倒。651Please respect copyright.PENANAbLGBiAwCej
651Please respect copyright.PENANAlCOa5o9LpM
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……651Please respect copyright.PENANAGDz5sYDOv1
651Please respect copyright.PENANAcTmDknyGcs
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」651Please respect copyright.PENANAwnTqfuTOOJ
651Please respect copyright.PENANAJYMvMcVGdu
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。
假期,醫院。651Please respect copyright.PENANA1VEEK9woHM
651Please respect copyright.PENANATmxcSdPlZK
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。651Please respect copyright.PENANAIm0WEsW3No
651Please respect copyright.PENANAObwFENIEwL
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。651Please respect copyright.PENANAPIIN37z1qk
651Please respect copyright.PENANAYUWIT4gm1T
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」651Please respect copyright.PENANAPDuK1H3G6i
651Please respect copyright.PENANAp8pCFHiIdE
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。651Please respect copyright.PENANAI9saA5feKA
651Please respect copyright.PENANAcFtNoDHHsm
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。651Please respect copyright.PENANA1pSbBT7OUW
651Please respect copyright.PENANAbjrzPVoB7u
死寂。651Please respect copyright.PENANActs0ppUqgs
651Please respect copyright.PENANAqZ55gtcfqQ
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。
回家,晚飯。651Please respect copyright.PENANAeGVV7Yo0Wj
651Please respect copyright.PENANAccrh60WWeQ
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。651Please respect copyright.PENANArteFGDsOFv
651Please respect copyright.PENANAdad9EoUmzN
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」651Please respect copyright.PENANAMSqwxy7bFY
651Please respect copyright.PENANAB2hYn42BZI
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。651Please respect copyright.PENANA8Z9gxP8bj6
651Please respect copyright.PENANARQg4UMII5B
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。651Please respect copyright.PENANApzW7JGQKo5
651Please respect copyright.PENANAH4IRqlGLVK
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。651Please respect copyright.PENANAeFZfLPo9tm
651Please respect copyright.PENANAIorJBunMms
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。651Please respect copyright.PENANAqjRLvtQ8J5
651Please respect copyright.PENANAAPSPJ5VoEZ
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。
男友家,床上。651Please respect copyright.PENANAifBG6wQStn
651Please respect copyright.PENANAvuht7aPI56
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。651Please respect copyright.PENANAZO5xzIeg4p
651Please respect copyright.PENANAHjkGFqkVIL
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。651Please respect copyright.PENANANYrvWze2Es
651Please respect copyright.PENANAEApuySi8B8
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」651Please respect copyright.PENANA42xTknpxP9
651Please respect copyright.PENANA0JQYJq7bnI
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。651Please respect copyright.PENANAjJbOJUuVRP
651Please respect copyright.PENANA5QpUvAcaob
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。651Please respect copyright.PENANAmZQZ6rOAu3
651Please respect copyright.PENANA5YnyoBBVYA
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。651Please respect copyright.PENANAYzp7zSjNNJ
651Please respect copyright.PENANAJKXSHzkvnL
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。651Please respect copyright.PENANAdHnpeCavlp
651Please respect copyright.PENANALpNxhbRpZz
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。651Please respect copyright.PENANAHlaLfUafN8
651Please respect copyright.PENANAxVIdYFz8Nx
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。651Please respect copyright.PENANAlpPIPyx2Nq
651Please respect copyright.PENANAjBI39bta8u
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。651Please respect copyright.PENANACVyi1U7RVN
651Please respect copyright.PENANAQZYTEcROtQ
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。651Please respect copyright.PENANAGDR1W0VAwk
651Please respect copyright.PENANAlWCpvdIGJp
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」651Please respect copyright.PENANAQ6fNLpoVe2
651Please respect copyright.PENANAc7jyrWkoSC
「在你體內。」651Please respect copyright.PENANAOsrXn3iA78
651Please respect copyright.PENANA1CF8mmjE8H
「甚麼?」651Please respect copyright.PENANAA50ADlW1ye
651Please respect copyright.PENANAF0tRmEnubX
「蟻。」
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。651Please respect copyright.PENANAMopxw4XPtR
651Please respect copyright.PENANAyKsM7rhmEC
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!651Please respect copyright.PENANAPcpwnLoqno
651Please respect copyright.PENANAWGYaWGVloe
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。651Please respect copyright.PENANAYlaTAroqAm
651Please respect copyright.PENANAccslJhI97d
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。651Please respect copyright.PENANAWOOo7YczLf
651Please respect copyright.PENANARnfw7UhZf7
「誰?」另一聲音反問。651Please respect copyright.PENANAU0zAM1C5dQ
651Please respect copyright.PENANADkhw3icR8i
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」651Please respect copyright.PENANAs6kqxIaNts
651Please respect copyright.PENANAS9GkdROvJr
靜。651Please respect copyright.PENANA8TTQPI0SDt
651Please respect copyright.PENANA3YclzAdy2p
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」651Please respect copyright.PENANA43QNxdYvkN
651Please respect copyright.PENANApaflT47jgo
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」651Please respect copyright.PENANAZfbs5M3bQW
651Please respect copyright.PENANAPUrzhuaUTZ
我:「我有精神病?」651Please respect copyright.PENANAoFLCcsEPnS
651Please respect copyright.PENANA95Flo2OvVz
醫:「是情緒病。」651Please respect copyright.PENANAr149Byj7Rv
651Please respect copyright.PENANAQn8mIbPc39
我:「怎麼辦?」651Please respect copyright.PENANACHDQRnE2Nb
651Please respect copyright.PENANAMQhYc6s6jE
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」651Please respect copyright.PENANAnelAdIkFt4
651Please respect copyright.PENANA4K1j2fBu0g
我:「謝謝醫生。」651Please respect copyright.PENANA4pdkhuYdyR
651Please respect copyright.PENANAkUPKf46YP0
醫:「不用謝。」651Please respect copyright.PENANAuZbguWdV3C
651Please respect copyright.PENANATSUqfp8Wzw
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。651Please respect copyright.PENANAzedGqck4ax
651Please respect copyright.PENANA5EX0Tckwvr
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?651Please respect copyright.PENANANwUPCiPlCp
651Please respect copyright.PENANAq9cZZszvWY
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;651Please respect copyright.PENANAUlMEqB9ZJR
651Please respect copyright.PENANAIFjF1S1ctR
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;651Please respect copyright.PENANA0Fi3MEjTHT
651Please respect copyright.PENANARPcuCl7DH4
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;651Please respect copyright.PENANA9fqTCQZadp
651Please respect copyright.PENANAAudPwM6QnZ
……651Please respect copyright.PENANAugfll0jFGX
651Please respect copyright.PENANAYVXuup05mU
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。651Please respect copyright.PENANAgA80lKHOBM
651Please respect copyright.PENANAq8KfhCsX3r
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……