二十年前——342Please respect copyright.PENANAok9T6qja5G
342Please respect copyright.PENANAFBS3X5SXZX
小荷是個人見人愛的六歲小女孩,胖胖白白的臉配上一雙水靈大眼。她每天穿著荷媽親手做的一雙由彩色布碎拼湊而成的小鞋子到處玩耍,有時會跟同村的孩子們跑上山頭採菇,有時會為獨居老人送上新鮮採摘的漂亮花朵,有時會在湖邊遊蕩。342Please respect copyright.PENANAI5zMYKMkhZ
342Please respect copyright.PENANAHuq8paL4rS
荷媽曾多次提醒她切勿走近湖邊,但小荷偏偏喜歡看蓮花,說蓮花是仙女的化身。荷媽忙著預備晚餐,不甚耐煩地反譏小荷幼稚。小荷不堪被譏諷,激動嚷著會帶蓮花仙女回家,然後頭也不回衝出家門。342Please respect copyright.PENANA5K1n9J3TOI
342Please respect copyright.PENANA2i19m3kPdR
傍晚,晚餐備好了,小荷還沒有回家。荷媽心緒不寧,深怕小荷遇上意外。她挑燈外出,急步走往湖邊。342Please respect copyright.PENANAmvpHDjyduy
342Please respect copyright.PENANAZHBX3yzFwq
小荷不在。342Please respect copyright.PENANAhUG1u2sqMW
342Please respect copyright.PENANA4HYy3EGWjL
荷媽的心頭涼了大截,連忙前去村長家求助。沒多久,大伙兒在湖邊叢林間搜索。342Please respect copyright.PENANALLCJTYScUC
342Please respect copyright.PENANAggILQkxR2d
無發現。342Please respect copyright.PENANA3r0jVmUzXQ
342Please respect copyright.PENANA5KstrRU2Si
村長打算重新部署搜索行動之際,有人指著湖中央的一朵蓮花大叫:「看!湖中那朵蓮花上有一隻鞋!」342Please respect copyright.PENANARGhqN7QhFt
342Please respect copyright.PENANA5NQlSb6Ew9
大伙兒定睛細看,卻因光線不足而未能確定那是否一隻鞋。荷媽救女心切,不理眾人勸阻跳入湖中游向那朵蓮花。游著、游著,她的身影突然消失了。342Please respect copyright.PENANAkchW0MpCqJ
342Please respect copyright.PENANAP9lLAE7ZUL
為免有更多人命犧牲,村民只得待天亮才落水找荷媽。不出所料,荷媽的腳踝被水草纏住,溺斃湖底。村民認得蓮花上的鞋子確是屬於小荷,但找遍湖底亦找不到她的身影。唯有繼續在林間搜索。無果。個多月後,眾人認為找到小荷的機會渺茫,於是停止搜索。342Please respect copyright.PENANAtvuRst81d7
342Please respect copyright.PENANAvwQR9Jp0Lm
村裡開始流傳蓮花仙女帶走小荷的傳聞……342Please respect copyright.PENANAkp8tfdaPpX
342Please respect copyright.PENANAByqaC5yg60
「那是在你出生前發生的事情?」阿夏一邊聽得著迷,一邊望著車窗外的油油綠草地,驚嘆著這寧靜山村背後竟有這種可怕事。342Please respect copyright.PENANAn7ip7Tz0FS
342Please respect copyright.PENANAIqwBBw264w
「不。當年我十歲,和小荷挺熟絡。」芙兒沒心情欣賞風景,逕自倚著椅背,微微仰首凝視車廂天花那色調偏冷的米光燈。342Please respect copyright.PENANA09Km7O3xaB
342Please respect copyright.PENANACL6YRmk56J
「小荷失蹤一事是你當警察的原因嗎?」阿夏與芙兒作伴數年,不難看出芙兒心事重重,尤其今趟「回鄉之旅」是離鄉別井十多年的芙兒主動提出,可見其別具意義。342Please respect copyright.PENANAgmZacCRcQg
342Please respect copyright.PENANANLt2RJi831
「嗯……一部份吧。不能說是完全因為她,也不能說是與這事情毫無關係。」芙兒苦笑,些許後悔無故主動提及這大煞風景的陳年往事。回鄉目的不是向各位鄉親苦老宣佈自己與阿夏的婚訊和設喜宴嗎?不是要歡天喜地、眉開眼笑嗎?342Please respect copyright.PENANAtoxIJ4YIuY
342Please respect copyright.PENANAN1v5A5t6EE
「不管如何……」阿夏是個聰明人,明明對案件內容細節有興趣,但也知道要適可宜止。他輕拍芙兒的手背,安慰道:「事情已然過去,多想無益。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAFpqJiIg6PF
342Please respect copyright.PENANAKhypBOcrGE
「是的。過去了。」芙兒吁一口氣,似是釋懷,奈何揪心的感覺難以單憑幾句安慰說話連根拔起。342Please respect copyright.PENANAqvN6mSlsdl
342Please respect copyright.PENANA8M7rQyDxqD
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?342Please respect copyright.PENANADPYhdLDaLC
342Please respect copyright.PENANAdpVmK2W7Oa
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。342Please respect copyright.PENANAybsQ0foEWU
342Please respect copyright.PENANAHqGJoONwvj
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAy47urMtFve
342Please respect copyright.PENANAHxjARv51QK
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。342Please respect copyright.PENANA1C6nE2Bhyo
342Please respect copyright.PENANATMEQQOsGL2
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。時間彷彿隨著步伐逆行,日落月出,瞬間回到二十年前那個夜晚……342Please respect copyright.PENANAgC3BS2YHIl
342Please respect copyright.PENANAy1wmtv8ZHA
「我帶芙兒外出散步散心。」晚飯後,芙爸病懨懨地對妻子說。342Please respect copyright.PENANAT525CokO6b
342Please respect copyright.PENANAuVDTrZDvS4
「嗯。」芙媽忙於照顧病兒,分身不暇。342Please respect copyright.PENANAcctX7RGaNx
342Please respect copyright.PENANACSk3y5uELI
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上,芙爸眉頭鎖得更深。芙兒乖乖不作聲,默默尾隨他快步走。342Please respect copyright.PENANAeyx0r1vXuw
342Please respect copyright.PENANAIubEIq9Abh
「芙兒,你愛媽媽嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANA5L37jpQeID
342Please respect copyright.PENANAWaxbYf9U4c
「愛。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAmDAl3BaL9i
342Please respect copyright.PENANAPUMj5ya7HH
「你愛爸爸嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANAIOWCa8aZiJ
342Please respect copyright.PENANAMuVuJFunIf
「愛。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAOpTNKh6jYZ
342Please respect copyright.PENANAvRXXw8Patj
「你愛哥哥嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANApqGoBBvm1X
342Please respect copyright.PENANAcLJfB5gW15
芙兒心裡一寒,不自已停下腳步——她早前無意間發現爸爸向前任村長秘密查詢有關人口販子的事。難道爸爸為了替哥哥籌措醫藥費而打算賣掉她?342Please respect copyright.PENANAr9xQQcfNKg
342Please respect copyright.PENANAjzMCsM3IsR
「你愛我嗎?」芙兒無力反問。342Please respect copyright.PENANAWBX6CsbTiJ
342Please respect copyright.PENANATXUHrRMTYH
芙爸沒有回答,繼續低頭開步走。342Please respect copyright.PENANAqd3H2YmjIM
342Please respect copyright.PENANA8ECK0JoLx2
芙兒想要跑回家去,雙腳卻不由自主隨著爸爸走,縱然明知那是不歸路。342Please respect copyright.PENANA3eFieiJtv4
342Please respect copyright.PENANA0sHVTb4ThB
途經蓮花池,巧遇小荷。芙爸倏忽衝前打昏小荷。芙兒明白爸爸的意圖,連忙拉住他。342Please respect copyright.PENANAr1ryR9C9ZX
342Please respect copyright.PENANAUyE61Qf5ZE
「小荷是無辜的!」342Please respect copyright.PENANAQDlqwT9Euj
342Please respect copyright.PENANACoQxUEedzL
「但我捨不得你啊!」342Please respect copyright.PENANAucXblCvobt
342Please respect copyright.PENANAX5IJ3hw4y9
芙兒不期然鬆開了手——她聽得出話裡的割捨與堅決。爸爸向來善良老實,日子艱難亦不會做鼠竊狗偷的勾當。奈何今次關乎兒子的生命安危和女兒的命運!他寧可割捨良知,亦要保住家人。342Please respect copyright.PENANAgdHyqbPKVg
342Please respect copyright.PENANAuU5AnNxjlv
芙兒理解了、妥協了,芙爸眼神反倒更為悲憤不安。他脫下小荷的一隻鞋,使勁拋向蓮花池。鞋子剛好不偏不倚落在池中央的一朵大蓮花上。342Please respect copyright.PENANAqVE8YH6fk9
342Please respect copyright.PENANAtCPDhOWTGf
父女兩人不約而同望向那朵大蓮花。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。342Please respect copyright.PENANAZkoxn2KUQg
342Please respect copyright.PENANAGHeUfFstGd
小黑點,人生裡的大污點。342Please respect copyright.PENANAcLdhEMU3Bj
342Please respect copyright.PENANAC7dfq09faC
來到約定的地方。人口販子沒有芙兒想像中的鼠頭獐目。他相貌平凡,打扮平凡,舉止平凡,有如田裡的一顆穀粒,獨一無二卻平凡普通。342Please respect copyright.PENANAUgO8o82Msu
342Please respect copyright.PENANAVYiOQ6M31O
二人無聲的奉上小荷,默默的收下金錢,不能見光的交易在無光的樹林中順利完成。342Please respect copyright.PENANAtvMYIKv4f3
342Please respect copyright.PENANA5MgpP3TaRU
芙兒自此在這夜池邊中無限輪迴。342Please respect copyright.PENANALH7462Rloy
342Please respect copyright.PENANAnWHSg0BdCy
晝如夜,夜是夜。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,異裝同臉。池中有蓮,家中有蓮,路中有蓮,蓮上有鞋。342Please respect copyright.PENANA7mLbHFOyOJ
342Please respect copyright.PENANAcWRQH9z8O3
瘋了。芙兒的世界瘋了。342Please respect copyright.PENANAsgZtiOBNJt
342Please respect copyright.PENANARgRjQ8Au0a
需要救贖。無人能救。只得自救。342Please respect copyright.PENANApDoRuSiTWB
342Please respect copyright.PENANAlfsxhcbTRS
救哥哥,犧牲小荷。救自己,犧牲誰?342Please respect copyright.PENANAlYCqsQ3PAP
342Please respect copyright.PENANAFbUfmsHsGO
「記住,賣掉小荷的人是我,不是你。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAoqyMZazH1H
342Please respect copyright.PENANAo5HN1pfPm0
「我沒有阻止你。」342Please respect copyright.PENANA1JkIwlwJWn
342Please respect copyright.PENANAhLvPU35Bsq
「阻止得了麼?」342Please respect copyright.PENANApy9fUao5WE
342Please respect copyright.PENANA4xfQgm4zf0
「至少,我該要嘗試。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAZNuYgoApq5
342Please respect copyright.PENANASdiBD53uND
「嘗試有用麼?」342Please respect copyright.PENANAAaXvpMPKPo
342Please respect copyright.PENANA8fuqjinRaH
芙兒如夢初醒——芙爸企圖獨自扛起一切責任,救贖芙兒。她不自控笑著流淚,內心得到救贖的同時又跌落另一深淵——自己得救,爸爸犧牲。342Please respect copyright.PENANAmoJKNRsrGc
342Please respect copyright.PENANAM67to35Duf
真的得到了救贖嗎?不肯定。342Please respect copyright.PENANAgMv1i4a621
342Please respect copyright.PENANA7pDoFGuSms
她離鄉到城市尋找工作,輾轉當上警察。對失蹤案尤感興趣。找人,找救贖。找到人,找不到救贖。342Please respect copyright.PENANAiHWOsNcfhl
342Please respect copyright.PENANAVZ2EWrauJs
收到來自家鄉的信,提及哥哥病逝。她丟掉信件,假裝未曾收到。根本沒意義,根本誰也沒能得救,無論犧牲多大。342Please respect copyright.PENANACeRRYnVQft
342Please respect copyright.PENANACtrxWXz71T
芙媽來了,問芙兒為何不出席哥哥的喪禮。她說不知道哥哥逝世一事。芙媽低頭掩面大笑,笑了很久,然後哭了很久。「你爸說你不會為此回來,我說你不是狠心的人。原來我們都錯了——你根本不知情。」342Please respect copyright.PENANADN4FXf0TOP
342Please respect copyright.PENANAO7d1hUYcpX
有甚麼值得笑或哭?芙兒不明白。或許媽媽也不明白,純粹為笑而笑、為哭而哭,無謂卻有為。至少她的情緒得以紓緩,面容不再繃緊。342Please respect copyright.PENANA9svqKUSlfW
342Please respect copyright.PENANAFhKe2hGq9c
數年後,芙媽死了。芙兒同樣沒有出席喪禮。她向上司請假數天,躲在家裡,足不出戶。不斷憶起媽媽當日又哭又笑的癲狂模樣。真羨慕。沒有隱藏,沒有秘密。342Please respect copyright.PENANAikHtRbyIyf
342Please respect copyright.PENANAgB8FNOZ3zc
假期完結後,芙兒重投工作。警局來了一個新丁,名叫阿夏,比芙兒年輕數載。他長有一張孩子臉,胖胖白白,水靈大眼,像小荷。芙兒的目光離不開阿夏,主動接近他、勾搭他。二人由相識至同睡一床,僅是三天內的事。342Please respect copyright.PENANAtkng9KSCaw
342Please respect copyright.PENANADlSJaebUns
阿夏不解。342Please respect copyright.PENANAKw1XGruAoU
342Please respect copyright.PENANAzp1wEoOO4w
「你不似是水性楊花的女人。」342Please respect copyright.PENANA1wwEEsXQyO
342Please respect copyright.PENANAzZoZ05aPux
「你不似是諸事八卦的男人。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAJHzYjHNGRf
342Please respect copyright.PENANAeEY056Jocy
阿夏開始追求芙兒。芙兒不接受,卻偶爾與他同睡。為何不愛他卻會與他睡?是發洩,是鬱悶,或是對往事的情感投射?芙兒解釋不了,亦不想解釋——找到解釋之時,另一個問題就會隨即出現。342Please respect copyright.PENANAt0Nd1y1bYM
342Please respect copyright.PENANAYvrsJBei21
繼續同睡,繼續被追求,繼續找人找救贖。生活不過如此,平平凡凡,無無謂謂。342Please respect copyright.PENANAgqZ1rn6KAy
342Please respect copyright.PENANAjXwSgn8Psc
數年後的某天,芙兒收到來自兒時鄰居的一通電話。對方說芙爸病重,行將就木,希望她回鄉探望。342Please respect copyright.PENANAMixN7TcOJG
342Please respect copyright.PENANAX5WD1BxU0W
「是他希望我回去,或是大家希望我回去探望他?」342Please respect copyright.PENANA2s5rFzRGf1
342Please respect copyright.PENANAl5QxwdBY0a
「他堅持不要通知你,但大家還是決定要告訴你。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAUEVfQiMboy
342Please respect copyright.PENANAGbNEwT36QS
「我明白了。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAwSOYFjiezk
342Please respect copyright.PENANAJo87p3T8gO
當晚,芙兒跟阿夏說要盡快回鄉宣佈婚訊、設喜宴。342Please respect copyright.PENANAt4fm25mKRW
342Please respect copyright.PENANAVba2YYTnAs
「你跟誰結婚?」阿夏詫異。342Please respect copyright.PENANAb8FLUr4z5B
342Please respect copyright.PENANA61miRWyOzZ
「你。」芙兒明白阿夏的不明白。342Please respect copyright.PENANAhBRicgXAHv
342Please respect copyright.PENANANfemAaizgA
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?342Please respect copyright.PENANAEfz0MYItSe
342Please respect copyright.PENANAKYJkPBo1Qa
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。342Please respect copyright.PENANA5SLnzmaA2z
342Please respect copyright.PENANAEICeXE6e7D
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」342Please respect copyright.PENANANEwkmiC8GV
342Please respect copyright.PENANAlcJSR9Voxz
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。342Please respect copyright.PENANAgn3k0iRSro
342Please respect copyright.PENANA0z4DWoKWJh
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。踱踱踱,時間有可能隨著步伐逆轉,帶她回到二十年前的那個晚上嗎?若明知結果,她還是會不阻止爸爸賣掉小荷嗎?342Please respect copyright.PENANALHHVTMIOlQ
342Please respect copyright.PENANABI8Tii1CtS
老家陋宅裡,趁著阿夏上廁所的空檔,芙兒湊近芙爸耳邊直接問:「若明知結果,你還是會賣掉小荷嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANARHxaKwrwBS
342Please respect copyright.PENANABbdJsOuKDU
「會。」氣若柔絲的芙爸斬釘截鐵:「因為我是當爸的。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAWEo5w1tsaJ
342Please respect copyright.PENANAOaSKufBpJw
「若沒有遇上小荷,你會賣掉我嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANAbly1VwT5lk
342Please respect copyright.PENANAf6ZbAa4BJt
「會。因為你們兄妹倆都會活著。活著才會有希望。」342Please respect copyright.PENANA03oJiH9lXF
342Please respect copyright.PENANAdJyPuAYQn7
芙兒大受刺激,轉身奪門而出。342Please respect copyright.PENANA4XqYbRNjv1
342Please respect copyright.PENANAUKuxOl9Tui
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上行人疏落,卻異裝同臉,小荷的臉。路中倏忽生出白蓮朵朵,蓮上皆有小彩鞋一隻。芙兒知道自己瘋了,眼前盡是幻覺。理智脫軌,她不再恐懼,像個十歲的少女那樣跳脫輕盈,一步踏一蓮,來到池邊。342Please respect copyright.PENANAy31iNesW0B
342Please respect copyright.PENANAnGJ1YV5Njq
池邊有人,像小荷,像芙爸,像人口販子,像阿夏。她握著一隻彩色小鞋,木無表情直盯池中那朵大蓮花。芙兒走近女子,女子報以微笑,遞上手中小鞋。342Please respect copyright.PENANA5CLTnImwmP
342Please respect copyright.PENANAAqy05PPtwx
芙兒接過它,模仿爸爸當晚的姿勢,以完美的拋物線弧度拋出小鞋。小鞋不偏不倚剛好落在池中央的蓮花上,有如二十年前的那夜。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。342Please respect copyright.PENANATrUCMP6zIg
342Please respect copyright.PENANACDYE1j9qhb
女人哈哈大笑起來,笑聲豁然開朗。芙兒腳下的白蓮和小鞋驀地消失隱去,唯獨女子依然完好站在面前。笑過以後,女子轉身離開,身影沒入林間不復見。342Please respect copyright.PENANA28l4V8S7oa
342Please respect copyright.PENANAgxhYr4dgJB
芙兒惘然——她不肯定對方是幻覺或是確切存在的真人。342Please respect copyright.PENANAzCU7GbwyIB
342Please respect copyright.PENANAgfcfHGuAtE
數日後,芙爸與世長辭。342Please respect copyright.PENANA8Qw3dbePXk
342Please respect copyright.PENANA1fwkET9OQX
「既然不需要沖喜,你還會跟我結婚嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANApNfoaCrdTn
342Please respect copyright.PENANAhkEdjAo8QH
「你想跟我結婚嗎?」342Please respect copyright.PENANAtkG8qjRaZz
342Please respect copyright.PENANAynfUQjTTZw
「想。我愛你。」342Please respect copyright.PENANA51YNakPazn
342Please respect copyright.PENANAt1y1bvsYCp
「那就繼續吧。」342Please respect copyright.PENANAFadDF4p6ks
342Please respect copyright.PENANAmd862hJOJD
喜慶夜,大排筵席。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,新郎是小荷,老爺是小荷,奶奶是小荷,滿堂皆是小荷。芙兒帶醉喜極而泣,感激小荷前來祝福她。342Please respect copyright.PENANAzSeoFY0sT1
342Please respect copyright.PENANAWTJVXZy0Pn
宴後,賓客散去。醉得幾近失去意識的芙兒被攙扶到新房去。滾燙的臉龐忽爾涼涼的。她知道有人為她用濕毛巾抹臉抹汗。342Please respect copyright.PENANAPKbh49pSAO
342Please respect copyright.PENANAfQDcCn0IWj
「謝謝你……小荷……」342Please respect copyright.PENANABgCza6xkDi
342Please respect copyright.PENANArJBZizLNTL
「不用客氣……」342Please respect copyright.PENANAUX1Kkl2UWX
342Please respect copyright.PENANAtNDOQdqM15
說著說著,阿夏哭了。晶瑩淚水沿著胖白的臉頰下滑,水靈大眼楚楚可憐。像小荷。