I placed my fingertips against my face and snorted in disgust, my
face screwing into a scowl. I played with my short black hair pulling
and twisting it. I looked at my scrawny body that I hide behind
boyish clothes and at my face that held self loathing behind a smile.
I averted my eyes away from myself.871Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmaMShQNETR
I was disgusting.
Walking out of the bathroom, I slowly shuffled to my bed and flopped onto it with a sigh. I turned towards the wall letting a tired scowl accommodate my face.
I was sick of pretending to be what I wasn't even if it was my idea. I mean I brought this upon myself and it worked out good for a few years, but lately I felt that I was restricted. I want to go back to being able to play with my hair all the time and be able to wear dresses and wear skirts.
I sighed. Why should I though? I would just look revolting. No one would go for a girl like me. No one would go for a girl who crossdresses as a boy. I'm not supermodel material. I don’t have long hair ever since I cut it, beautiful long legs, a perfect button nose, full lips, full eyelashes........
I'm not beautiful. And I can accept that. Even if it hurts like hell.
Shutting my eyes I held back the tears threatening to fall as I drifted into unconsciousness.
…..................................................................................................................................................................
I opened my eyes and noticed I was in a bright white room. It was small, Simple. There wasn't any furniture except a beautifully hand crafted mirror painted silver. The glass was shining brightly as it contrasted in the white room. I looked at myself in the mirror before promptly looking away.
Then I felt two hands land on my shoulders. They made me shiver. They weren't cold. They were the quite opposite actually. They were very warm. That warmth seeped through my shirt making me blush.
I looked into the mirror again and just saw a shadow. I stared curiously. How can a shadow be so warm? So comforting?
Then I whispered quietly. “ Who are you?”
I felt him chuckle behind me and he slid his hands until they rested on my bare arms making me shiver again. Then I felt his warm breath ghost over my ear as he whispered to me.
“ That is of no concern.”
His voice was soft and husky and I wanted to just lean into him, but I snapped out of my little trance and tried to turn around but found I couldn’t. My eyes widening, I asked as calmly as I could:
“ Who are you and what do you want?”
He chuckled again. I felt his chin rest on my shoulder. “ Like I said my identity is of no concern. What I want is to help you.”
“ Help me? With what?”
“ To help you see how beautiful you truly are. I'm here to show you that.” He whispered.
“ What do you mean? I'm not beautiful. I don't need anyone to tell me I am because I know their lying.” I snapped jerking out of his hold. Then regretting it once coldness took over those once warm spots.
I heard him sigh deeply. I felt him touch my arm that sent warmth coursing thorough my entire body but I just shook him off.
“ Don't touch me.” I hissed.
He sighed again. “ Samantha I'm just trying to help you. I know your upset-”
I stopped him by raising my hand. “ What did you just call me?”
“ Samantha. Isn't that your name? Or was I mistaken?” He said confused
I felt tears sting my eyes. “ My name's Sam always has been. You have no right to call me by my birth name. I don't deserve it.”
I heard him sigh again for the third time. “ Sam I'm just trying to help you. You may not believe me right now but your a beautiful individual and you deserve to be called Samantha as much as you want. Trust me when I say that soon you will.”
I crossed my arms still unable to turn around. “ What do you mean?”
I heard the smile in his voice as he spoke again. “ I mean that I will visit you for five days and show you that your a beautiful woman and that you shouldn't hide it from the world and especially from yourself.”
I dug my nails into my arms. “ I don't hide anything from myself. I always tell the truth.”
I didn't push him off this time as he wrapped his arms around my middle. Then he whispered to me:
“ I know the views you have of yourself and it isn't healthy. Your deceiving yourself. Your truly a beautiful person and I don't know how many times someone has to tell you until you figure it out. So I guess you need to figure it out for yourself.”
His arms slipped away from my waist. “ Samantha Maria Brown. A beautiful daughter and growing woman. To everyone else she's perfect. Now you just need to feel the same.”
I felt my lip tremble. “ Why are you helping me? What makes you think I'm beautiful? Huh?!”
“ Because you are. And I'm helping you because your someone in need of help. You wont go to your friends or family and because of that you'll break if you don't get help now.”
“ I still don't get it! Why help an ugly duckling like me? I not worth your help.” I said tears running down my tan face.
I felt him brush a piece of hair behind my ears and spin me around hugging me to his chest. I gasped at how warm he was. His strong arms wrapped around me making me feel safe and secure.
That's when I broke down.
I cried and sobbed. I didn't even feel when I was getting lightweight and when his arms disappeared from around me. But I did hear him say:
“ Your beautiful Sam. Now I just have to show you I mean it.”
…..................................................................................................................................................................
I shot up with a gasp as I looked around my small room. Sunlight was streaming in through the window.
Everything was quiet except for the sounds of birds chirping outside and people talking loudly.
I shivered as warmth cascade throughout my entire body making me shiver and blush.
I remembered everything.
Yet I shook it off as one of those weird dreams that people get for no reason. Planting my bare-feet on the carpeted floor, I reached up to rub my eyes, but I almost screamed at what I uncovered that changed my thought process on the dream I just had.
My face was wet with fresh tears.
ns216.73.216.173da2
