x
天亮，上班。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4gm04zebGk
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFV7FHL9wD
擠進人山人海的車廂，心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物，我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟，好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1qfTiGFruL
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgWhSh90Aax
車廂一如往常，平穩中帶輕微搖晃，教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲，繼續進食，令人側目。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8hNt7gUqte
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEnjuCURfnc
食物的細碎，像沙子一樣，在人們毫不注意的情況下，悄然掉在地上，再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站，人們再肆意加以踐踏，令碎粉再度粉碎。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqlrLMv2RI
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65GUhyqmcs
到站了，我有意無意地繞過人羣，「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉，心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上，我回頭望進車廂，想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉，但列車經已開駛。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd4lLXrhat6
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBiGGQm4m6q
看不見，罷。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsDSaUF4bw
天黑，下班。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowE1aYKThO
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtYID5dFEE
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂，繼續講上司的壞話。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡscmekgmBio
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqjZRZn04rI
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJaWlMhRPiO
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWNitc552Vt
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不！有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰？我看不見……我不想看見……237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmL0EKi3Yr
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpPZ4UVkwt
「啪」的一聲，男同事一手拍在我的小腿上，那隻螞蟻——扁了。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTWy4jezJ1A
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfLJtbfATA
「沒事了！」他笑了笑，問我：「你很怕小昆蟲？」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8l6bnS35Ue
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqIC3h4HjCY
「不，只是怕蟻。」我感覺到，我的唇還在顫抖，但卻仍勉力一笑。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOQDYTj5ibs
公司，午飯時間。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuGX9p0N8l
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXU7k3luPnP
甲小姐正在上網看劇；乙先生在打盹；丙小姐外出吃飯去；丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒；戊小姐……237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIHB2D6kRyW
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3Q59J0Ekl
看著同事們的百態，我突然覺得自己和他們一樣，都是很渺小的生命體，小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事，尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌，不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎？那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別？237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qCgfe8ZhB
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVYGFGogta
驀地，我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過，卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上，讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失，我感到自己也消失了似的。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ysJGiB1gW
其實，真正的我只是一隻螞蟻，不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己變成人類，過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活，是有目的的付出，有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑，多奢侈！無他，這就是意義。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnUMXrO7Lt6
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCLuboXcbF
還是……237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Z3Quef1oH
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRy5uB46KB
其實，真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己是一隻蟻，過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味，只懂一味尋找食物。無他，這就是生存！237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeT9k03aSva
公司，工作。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFsvWY0p5Kt
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuNXGUir9QS
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDRBPqfKI8s
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxsQrKJtRg6
大家心知犯錯的不是我，奈何人是怕事的，只好把我推上斷頭台。事後，一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsiX2jlGA5B
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bJh4v1Xng
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3O2tJFkIE
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU9twjZGAZ5
剛巧，一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKhY8170TA
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWhDavCI9z
快意，笑了。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFi7DTh7zK
酒吧，喝酒。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnaszwOCM9c
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRD2LkKbMAf
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎？為何現在也怕酒起來？」男同事笑問。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY87uk5DD9G
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhZKrByyAx
「其實，我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3ST2xFRX3
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGbuXVJq9l
「還是……你根本不會喝酒？」他哈哈大笑。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQAUgbRXZk
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6VAlKrkupU
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲，我突然變得不大抗拒，乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4QhiRJn4P
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiOr8ZiaVvy
醉倒。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvTJAsXWpx
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HdHckUUBU
迷糊間，我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體，不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲，想要到它的洞穴去……237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSa5BrfkBeB
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZKMFOJj8zM
「上天取走你的一扇門，定會留給你一扇窗。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6l8hy3zFn3
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQonozcyraR
今趟，上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZNxU8AMNU
假期，醫院。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfgY0D2TiH
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOv3LAsCCj2
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病，還未明確，因為報告要待下星期才會完成。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdE98gjmCgn
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9EQJ0kpEyr
看見媽的時候，家中各人都是淚眼漣漣，很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHaOXc1wG9h
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYRyXkxHrh
「我覺得……」近幾天，媽的話都變得斷斷續續：「自己……」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6cR3FhBdHY
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLnnZ4aeAf
大家都屏息靜氣，深怕這是她的最後一句話。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRcQhf0Fgzf
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHkwBrj9Ele
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音，輕如柔絲，但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrLfEFRq8O
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRKbecyWhQ
死寂。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9YKaZvL64E
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGV5RZuexP
出乎我意料，這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話，不論是肉體還是心靈上。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr251TAnCxp
回家，晚飯。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIGQvL8s7KN
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcK4Ysaq96H
一枱六椅，異常的沉默。電視的聲浪，掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意，繼續吃。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAZQDQ7UOk
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXZBmKGRtW5
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子：「不如外出吃飯。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkbbbp6AAh
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynZuVAJpsf
妹放下筷子衝進房內，甩門；姨低下頭來，但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見；婆呆了，眼眶紅潤；我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnP6CAKYjWV
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ137d1nvq2A
我心想：世界末日來臨後，地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻？237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHQkVnCTEdN
每次望著媽，心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣，彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpA1K1FCb9K
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6bctUi5CLx
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑！就是因為她是一隻螞蟻，所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭，去減輕她的負擔。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkO5NU9IaF
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxYsN4Q1Iy
久而久之，我每次一見到她，便會掉頭走。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKzS5H25YdH
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rPjS56jV8
但我知道，我永沒能走遠。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUzwHwfl2q
男友家，床上。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSMNKH43coQ
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJPyRIxq2dv
前奏後，男友進入極度興奮狀態，沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時，我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcVZd2hukj
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5E7qd84vw
産房內有一張床，床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了，是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示，她要生産了。不消一會，整張床上都是幼蟻，恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwuNZkoijJt
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eyD8hXpwR
我驚恐萬分之際，耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音：「他朝君體也相同！」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGnOBALoid
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWmVyrzb4Tn
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮，於是更用力……237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYGz3T5Xno
舊生聚會，內地某酒家。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxhQ8jlGEL
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6v9SqcNs5U
說也奇怪，舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意，說會給我們驚喜。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGafXqRMqFu
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0epTIp6Dm
「蟻宴？」我呆了，但逃不了。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EjcAhtxH2
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWAT3XmzWrc
「你有收看《天與地》嗎？」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIv2QIHAhw
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN46IodA462
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼！」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ66gfDYyCOK
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqA5Baawbb
「結局何如？」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ791yakbom8
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bc1PKwoY1
「沒好下場！」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlDaEq035k
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4OTceyuAVg
「對！沒好下場！」我在心裡重覆著，衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcTzVbxNlD
男友有很多恐怖的寵物：蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時，他都會放一些寵物在床邊，以增加他的性趣。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnH3fYKgpiD
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtlv7sDpIx2
今趟，床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後，我不經意的問道：「你的寵物呢？」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAaidjmasb
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrUmaeJjTL
「在你體內。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDXOWvaIO7p
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBjy2wfqgp
「甚麼？」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5iFo0Kyxmf
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp5c8vvmJPp
「蟻。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZzb2AqmUC
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ59VV7X2ZGl
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgraylyUKtm
它平常會做甚麼？做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯，它會做的事真的很多，但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活！它最好立刻消失！237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy0vsajIopS
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODJSi9hevN
結果，我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0kFrB8Tlh
靈堂上，我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0KUns4Ilg3
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tirqSBH8z
「她真的死了嗎？」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊，但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbdLqooeYJ
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8LdbG62vpH
「誰？」另一聲音反問。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAx5lZuJgw
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ZHvUxZCpM
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道：「她……」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApHqqOQ2Ss
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHPgYnAGoT4
靜。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFCVvOkfa0
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVnpfriGN5Y
我回過神來，低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY8C8ZRIIZd
我：「我的耳朵有毛病嗎？為何會聽到螞蟻講話？」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJcm8BjL4N
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCohQw5cPl
醫：「不。是你的壓力過大，導致有幻聽。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CmMW1BQnP
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9kD7ffOPY
我：「我有精神病？」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKnqytVyFl6
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7ZCrxLWiQ
醫：「是情緒病。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuJMtoo1fE
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIwmBd6VpE
我：「怎麼辦？」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZljiMUi10C
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSBozpfcXED
醫：「我會處方一些藥物，你要按時服用；另外，你也要多休息……」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT43drNWUU1
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcC1WFslil
我：「謝謝醫生。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yWtp0EYZ3
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFgpbRNcyh
醫：「不用謝。」237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TX6keb2Bh
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡShdAkoVuni
離開診所時，我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TdiuJttyK
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi9LHanzX1c
不，我走近細看，是「虫馬虫義」專科。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6LTdY30qLG
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻？237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOGl4J7POw
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrG9jUBGSA0
醫生替我作身體檢查，一切正常；237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUqT10anV8U
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTURu10dTFy
男友向我解釋，螞蟻之說，純粹幽默；237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlvf5cZrj3p
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVmIFjBICM
同事都勸我休息，減少工作量；237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVCmv3p0KP
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8QWSrAKJy5
……237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoY6VrN7y1
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexWQWSO3q5
「真的有蟻在我體內！」我尖叫，奪門而出，從天台一躍而下，肝腦塗地。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9llQRph1nh
237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlg1QPWq2Yy
臨死前，我看見那東西了——不是蟻，是……
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規，煩請創挑主通知，願刪文。237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYCMES2a4xQ
