不知何故,她把父母的離異歸究到自己身上,認為那是因為母親並不喜歡自己;離開蘇家時,其母親並沒對她流露半點不捨之情,往後亦不怎麼接觸。人們以為作為蘇日坤的獨女,她必然是其掌上明珠,被受其寵愛;事實卻相反,蘇日坤並不特別疼愛她,把照顧她的責任都交予管家。即使蘇家人丁單薄,蘇日坤並不怎麼跟其家族親戚來往,致使蘇君慎對其他蘇氏的人一無所知。她的身邊不乏朋友,但她無法從他們身上感到自己是個被喜歡的人;或許是家庭背景有關,朋友們要不對她有所顧忌,要不對她有所圖謀。33Please respect copyright.PENANAI4vgg2JSn1
33Please respect copyright.PENANAAW3Oslg68O
岳君琳是個例外。她像是個姐姐一般的存在,也像是一個閨中密友,是她絕對信任的人,尤甚於其父親。33Please respect copyright.PENANAZQaVKuN0bK
33Please respect copyright.PENANA4NOik6qLjR
「阿姨跟表姐很像,都很溫柔,但又不是對每一個人都溫柔。」33Please respect copyright.PENANA2YzqcdXJdg
33Please respect copyright.PENANALw8VvXVRnQ
「對每一個人都溫柔是很累的。」我笑說。「不划算。」33Please respect copyright.PENANArruYrDjRes
33Please respect copyright.PENANADt8TaAQgeI
「到英國以後,就不會有人對我這麼溫柔了。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAt44g8FErYt
33Please respect copyright.PENANA4KIU7wri3r
「現在科技發達,打個電話,上個網就能見面啊!再說,你表姐本來就是在美國,從英國飛過去還比較近呢!」33Please respect copyright.PENANAotOshSJgCa
33Please respect copyright.PENANAIBxY9oBBCz
「自從表姐到爸爸公司工作後就很忙,我要找她都不容易。雖然她總會抽時間跟我聊天,也很關心我,再忙都不會不回我的訊息,但我知道她很累。工作已經夠忙的了,工作以後的空閒時間還要照顧我的感受,對她也是不公平的。所以,我已經决定不讓她操心,只跟她說輕鬆的、開心的...」33Please respect copyright.PENANABQ9jOhVOkx
33Please respect copyright.PENANApdbDZNXIMG
「那可不會是你表姐想的。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAgbb94Ymq1r
33Please respect copyright.PENANA6xxuVt1BPk
這是一個努力地催促自己長大的孩子。我向她微笑,她不明所以;我拍了拍她的手,她只抖了抖。33Please respect copyright.PENANAgPbO71Xko5
33Please respect copyright.PENANA2iMDA5exIF
「你害怕失去被寵著的感覺,但又决意把寵著你的人推開,那不自相矛盾嗎?」33Please respect copyright.PENANAAkSJMy2AQ8
33Please respect copyright.PENANAZS8StQbKrc
「但是...」33Please respect copyright.PENANASIxYwB989m
33Please respect copyright.PENANAqdoCyTX7oz
「阿姨告訴你,無論對方有多愛你疼你,你把人推開,終有一天她是真的會離開你的。難道這是你的本意嗎?」33Please respect copyright.PENANAGGT1nfT4Xb
33Please respect copyright.PENANAatBcK0aCOa
「不是。當然不是。」33Please respect copyright.PENANA4xrTkNG6lX
33Please respect copyright.PENANAQTAdENUbnD
「而當那個人離開了你,她是真的不會再回來,無論你多努力去挽留、去補救,走了的就是走了,追不回來,回不了去。」33Please respect copyright.PENANADDJln00k4d
33Please respect copyright.PENANArqhaNuNZqw
追不回來,回不了去。痛入了我的心扉。33Please respect copyright.PENANA8LuxwR1Ujq
33Please respect copyright.PENANA9HAMYq7xkR
「曾經也有一個人這麼寵著我,做什麼都以我的利益為依歸,把我寵得像是溫室小花一般。」微笑,我握著她的手,看著小枱面上的杯子。「表面上看來是我照顧著她,實質相反,她一直照顧著我。我努力地學習照顧自己也照顧她,以為這樣才是愛她的表現,結果卻非我所願。我們分開了。也不過是近期的事。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAp7gjmB6vjE
33Please respect copyright.PENANApxErCcYHnT
「原來,阿姨你失戀了?」她一臉關切,被我握著的手施了點力,把她的緊張都傳到我這兒。33Please respect copyright.PENANAj6Ek6CtVlk
33Please respect copyright.PENANAJka3G3iQ6G
「嗯。」我轉了轉眼眸,向她微笑,帶狡黠地說,「所以,我最近思考了很多。這都是我的經驗之談。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAdWCh3fYkRK
33Please respect copyright.PENANAmnk8FpdcXt
蘇君慎沒有回應,看著我,像是要從我的臉上找著什麼。我說我累了,著她去睡,便躺了下去,背對著她。33Please respect copyright.PENANAsORfNW5rsF
33Please respect copyright.PENANAukmz22rIoR
我不過是想靜靜,把硬拉了出來的情緒塞回去。她大概猜到,沒有反對,也躺了下去。33Please respect copyright.PENANAV205CTU09V
33Please respect copyright.PENANARFPMecKDoJ
我做了個夢,夢見她。我們在某個沙灘上,並肩坐著,看著海。她枕在我的肩上,讓我半邊身僵硬,半邊身酥軟。隨隨她吻在我的耳廓,吻在我的脖子,吻在我的鎖骨。一股電流在我體內流竄,讓我不住在抖。抖著,我伸手摟她的腰肢,卻抓了個空。醒來,我哭濕了枕頭。33Please respect copyright.PENANA0r4HAliTfM
33Please respect copyright.PENANAVLE1B4kFzf
那情景曾真實地存在過。哭,因為那已消失殆盡。33Please respect copyright.PENANAZE8NB67opO
33Please respect copyright.PENANAqj0yLVT29g
往洗手間梳洗了一番,換了一件汗衣,回到座位時燈開始亮,空氣中是麵包的味道。還有三個多小時便抵港,已沒法子再睡,我整理了一下自己的私人物件,便坐著等著。33Please respect copyright.PENANAb8R34hGvQ7
33Please respect copyright.PENANA9jKGzCdiSa
「阿姨早餐會吃什麼?」她也梳洗了一下。睡醒的樣子精神得很,與我差天共地。33Please respect copyright.PENANAKkwgnRbLWJ
33Please respect copyright.PENANAFTya6VS1wR
「粥吧!清一下腸胃也是好的。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAquuIQgKmkv
33Please respect copyright.PENANAD0huVGXpnE
「那我也是!」33Please respect copyright.PENANAkZGf0gijgX
33Please respect copyright.PENANAlSdpTbwqwT
我只微笑,沒有回應,反正不過三選一,無謂認真斟酌。33Please respect copyright.PENANAWUR0qEqOc6
33Please respect copyright.PENANAFS0COjOAkB
我們沒有聊天,各自吃著早餐,選一齣電影來看。她挑了什麼愛情小品,好奇查看我選的,發現我在看關於歐洲建築風潮的紀錄片,一臉難以置信地盯著我,良久才又繼續看她的。33Please respect copyright.PENANAzecHVQpmQE
33Please respect copyright.PENANADolCmoxC1w
影片看完,航機還有大半個小時便會進行降落程序,人們開始霸佔洗手間進行梳洗,又或是收拾一下隨身物品。我笑了,忽然覺得自己不在他們的行列當中也未嘗不是一件好事;畢竟,這種匆忙在本來已讓腦袋萎縮的高度是一項折磨。又要了一杯白酒,我笑著,什麼也不看,只看著自己的手。33Please respect copyright.PENANAmZaR0n3fkC
33Please respect copyright.PENANAYmj1eoDtuU
「阿姨。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAY51yKm6ZG7
33Please respect copyright.PENANAvYFYOkscLN
「怎麼了?」33Please respect copyright.PENANAIhHOn1F4Gs
33Please respect copyright.PENANAzWT2qu4IPu
「你會坐什麼車?」33Please respect copyright.PENANAZEMeW3cZhT
33Please respect copyright.PENANAm5Cp9aggST
「機鐵啊!又快又方便。」33Please respect copyright.PENANA882n54pNaX
33Please respect copyright.PENANAhfxvc0JoHd
「我送你一程?」33Please respect copyright.PENANA6ku1hkpiC0
33Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9vnffaBYK
「不用了!機鐵真的方便。出了入境大堂就是,在香港站換的士也是快。你這種坐私家車的還得走一段路才能上車,說不定上了車時我已經在中環了!」33Please respect copyright.PENANAUNzu6Lzp1X
33Please respect copyright.PENANAnFGyrpNWlW
她悶哼了一聲,有點失神,看著跟前螢幕播放著飛機底部的即時片段,不發一言。她的臉上無光,但明顯地想著什麼,時有皺眉,又時有牽強地笑。33Please respect copyright.PENANAxhqZ4CoUyF
33Please respect copyright.PENANAKD6j0lrScV
「在想什麼想得出神了?」我輕柔地問,微笑,喝著酒。她扭過頭來,木無表情地看著我。33Please respect copyright.PENANA23a3fr7dL0
33Please respect copyright.PENANAsB98etsmYz
「想起我們相遇時的事。」33Please respect copyright.PENANALG78yOjzBZ
33Please respect copyright.PENANAGSbNvGQe9V
「挺搞笑的,對吧?不過是幾天前的事。」我不禁失笑。33Please respect copyright.PENANAWWni3gQgNc
33Please respect copyright.PENANAHka1VzcEgE
「阿姨。我們會再見的,對嗎?」33Please respect copyright.PENANAh247CXL5i5
33Please respect copyright.PENANACXMv00PrqX
「嗯。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAjSxD9qnHWJ
33Please respect copyright.PENANABldjxYVKWZ
她這才鬆了一口氣般綻放笑容,喝著汽水,像個小孩一樣。33Please respect copyright.PENANAVKSALNZgd6
33Please respect copyright.PENANA3vJHhCbMhZ
從下機那刻開始,一直到入境,再到候領行李,我們都沒說話,但拉著手走著,不時相視而笑。很是奇怪,我不曾拉著一個只認識數天、還說不上相熟的人的手這麼久,公然無視周遭的目光,大模大樣地走在人來人往的機場。但我一點別扭的感覺也沒有;反倒覺得這一切來得自然。33Please respect copyright.PENANAjUEmQ1H89y
33Please respect copyright.PENANAoSAHhlzDSv
沒多久,我們各自推著自己的行李箱步出迎來閘。一個穿著整齊西裝的中年男人向我們這邊揮手,她微笑示意;我們往男人走,他亦快步上前接過她的行李。33Please respect copyright.PENANA40yiOunx9l
33Please respect copyright.PENANAoIP93yrX6n
「謝謝陳叔。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAIiCE31y0TB
33Please respect copyright.PENANAOIb2EXzGBn
「應該的,小姐。」他看了看我,微笑,點頭;我也如此回應。「需要送這位小姐回去嗎?」33Please respect copyright.PENANANnTpnFilcn
33Please respect copyright.PENANA3Sz5vKykOU
「啊!不用了。我坐機鐵就好。」33Please respect copyright.PENANA6ZzjhwqpEX
33Please respect copyright.PENANAIqO3uAGbcn
她的臉上有點失望,稍稍垂下頭一會兒,便著陳叔先行往車子走,自己則隨著我到另一方向的機鐵站。我沒有阻止,也沒有說什麼,以普通的步速走著。我們一直到了月台才開口說話。33Please respect copyright.PENANA3z7ORpNsDC
33Please respect copyright.PENANAHJhkJv8nZh
「好了!送到這就好了!要不然你就要跟我坐機鐵出市區了!」33Please respect copyright.PENANABuBFVDB4Rc
33Please respect copyright.PENANAJxmZmI3ga7
「那也可以。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAALwE0MzLOu
33Please respect copyright.PENANASbfls7TQi2
「我不是答應過你我們還會見面嗎?別弄得像是生離死別一樣。快回去吧!」我看見陳叔還站在遠處等著。「回到家給我一個whatsapp message報平安,知道嗎?」33Please respect copyright.PENANAoTKxgqU0kc
33Please respect copyright.PENANANBfpKXgY6X
「阿姨也要。」33Please respect copyright.PENANAOUEwY2CVaL
33Please respect copyright.PENANAMVJ20wQGnK
「知道了!」33Please respect copyright.PENANA9CqLIfrmq6
33Please respect copyright.PENANAThYCiFckdW
我忍不住捏了她的臉頰一下;她就像被我摸到頭一樣愣著。33Please respect copyright.PENANAMaTpiozBO1
33Please respect copyright.PENANAytmPMeUMUk
列車來了,我趕忙推著她離開;她是依依不捨地走了幾步便回頭一看,一段小路程走得像萬里長征一樣。我笑得燦爛,搖了搖頭,便轉身步進列車。置好行李,坐到座位上,掏出手機,開著,我往窗外看。她還站在我能看到的地方,縱是面目模糊,還是看得出來她在看我。我往她揮了揮手,她也舉著手臂搖著;一直到列車離開了機場,我再看不到她,這十八相送一般的場景才告一段落。33Please respect copyright.PENANAAH0ofTStrh
33Please respect copyright.PENANAk7bdr2Cs6t
手機終於完成開機程序,跳出多條訊息。我看到的卻只有一條。33Please respect copyright.PENANAi6mGWLSoPF
33Please respect copyright.PENANAhqwYsht6j4
『明天十點,老地方。』33Please respect copyright.PENANANhnMH3mPRu