思思記得,阿朗的父母為何離婚——窮,或者說是因為:曾經富貴。940Please respect copyright.PENANAaAvzB3bOtT
940Please respect copyright.PENANARITDpR82kh
她沒有驚訝,明白感情脆弱,一紙婚書故然比Facebook的關係欄可靠,但到底只是一張砂紙,用作擦嘴也嫌粗糙。940Please respect copyright.PENANAigi75Qtlsi
940Please respect copyright.PENANAadvwjWJyOy
大學二年級,思思從哲學系轉到社工系,因為她認為自己還是更適合落地工作,而且,探究形上形下,太困難,她連自己到底是誰都不太清楚。她覺得,這個社會充滿問題,談不上幫助所謂少數,只求與別人同行。940Please respect copyright.PENANAisX1u5UoXP
940Please respect copyright.PENANAjboPoPQIv8
阿朗同意。940Please respect copyright.PENANAYyudPZ1IQu
940Please respect copyright.PENANAgm3gTQOPmD
他回想以前的自己,如果有個人願意傾聽他,他會快樂很多;或者,很多事情又會很不一樣了。940Please respect copyright.PENANArkSLEj67ms
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阿朗的家中,父親開設工廠,收入可觀;母親在家看顧阿朗,見證牆上的「身高尺」越來越多鉛筆的痕跡。940Please respect copyright.PENANAA87kmNKLwk
940Please respect copyright.PENANAhjCMItaBJQ
父母很恩愛,非常懂得當着阿朗小小的腦袋展現甜蜜,也不忌諱對對方的讚美。940Please respect copyright.PENANACF5n4SAOOp
940Please respect copyright.PENANA0Y3325j5Cg
「阿仔,以後娶老婆,記得揾阿媽呢類型呀,又靚又顧家。真係美源髮彩!」940Please respect copyright.PENANAwKLbTFzfTn
940Please respect copyright.PENANAJt6AwuhA7j
「唔好喺啲細嘅面前講呢啲啦,教壞哂啦。」940Please respect copyright.PENANA7wep96IIpG
940Please respect copyright.PENANAhWNatuySDt
「真話有咩唔講得呀?教吓阿仔誠實嘅美德,好好喎。」940Please respect copyright.PENANACJrAQRCl6D
940Please respect copyright.PENANAokB7hbWilj
小時候的阿朗不明白,一九九七年的金融風暴為何令一切變天,分明無聲無息;而每次來勢洶洶的行雷閃電,都有父母在旁安撫他,和他說這是正常的,只是雷公受冷咳嗽,不用怕。940Please respect copyright.PENANASeTA9cDfWO
940Please respect copyright.PENANAnmOMcJzHYU
父親的工廠倒閉欠債;其時,母親再度懷孕,肚內的,是阿朗的弟弟。940Please respect copyright.PENANAor85BKe3Rx
940Please respect copyright.PENANAfEZUcYIpnG
父母開始爭吵,口中總唸着「冇錢呀」、「諗吓計啦」、「屌」,云云。940Please respect copyright.PENANAZTEeAxnArh
940Please respect copyright.PENANAygizt7vKGc
弟弟出世後,父母的關係沒有好轉。阿朗心懼,自我安慰:一切正常,不用怕。940Please respect copyright.PENANAavI9Dcky7H
940Please respect copyright.PENANATBlcbIXX8V
他也很想如此跟父母說,難道不可以和以前一樣開開心心地吃一頓飯嗎?為什麼要摔破媽媽最喜歡的墨綠瓷碟?為什麼將爸爸的模型公仔肢解?為什麼不理會弟弟的哭聲?他那尿片上的糞便已經乾冷……像透了朱古力——肚餓的阿朗揉揉眼睛。940Please respect copyright.PENANAhIVI8x9Ou8
940Please respect copyright.PENANAhp7Po2WGqs
生活質素一下子降級,大概,很難適應吧。940Please respect copyright.PENANA4U6Wr3hwOO
940Please respect copyright.PENANA3XCff5BtiW
從複式大屋搬到三百呎公屋,從魚翅到碗仔翅,從有暖氣到只有冷氣,從「啱size衫」到「買大少少着耐啲」,從「將各人衣物分機洗」到「一日只洗一機衫」——說白了,就是從有錢到沒錢,這就是家道中落嗎,哈。940Please respect copyright.PENANAcv2zfHUqwp
940Please respect copyright.PENANAoeGKG2BevM
可惜,沒有電視劇裏的最後東山再起。940Please respect copyright.PENANAExGUl99OrH
940Please respect copyright.PENANAzSvnziHb8z
從那以後,阿朗父母一直冷戰,如果說話,一定是抱怨生活、批評對方、踐踏對方的自尊,句句冷箭,阿朗作為兒子,聽着心寒。940Please respect copyright.PENANAd2OKcEnGeu
940Please respect copyright.PENANAymgPEfq7w8
「屙尿可唔可以揭起廁所板?當我係工人咁日日幫你抹?有錢請到阿四就話啫,但你又咁窮,妖,早知就唔嫁俾你!」940Please respect copyright.PENANAWH3mWKDyAo
940Please respect copyright.PENANA1ahfPcGBzb
「你都痴痴地,應該係我話唔娶你。你睇下你,個仔冇錢學嘢但你走去買護膚品?」940Please respect copyright.PENANAxt6sbCD3j4
940Please respect copyright.PENANAhD415LfHPw
「如果你慳番啲唔賭波,我洗搞到塊面又殘又黃?你估個個都好似你咁樣衰,唔理外表呀?」940Please respect copyright.PENANANF6RmWkWbC
940Please respect copyright.PENANAHjQT2LHQzd
這是曾經日夜向他盛讚伴侶的一對伊人麼。940Please respect copyright.PENANAHvdgADqfVz
940Please respect copyright.PENANAHjXFHBDXWE
心凍成冰,一整顆,供箭直插,爛成碎片,化水消失。他們已沒有心。940Please respect copyright.PENANAiPI8gMjWc9
940Please respect copyright.PENANA3AiYkYKw3g
原來所謂深愛,可以變得如此冷漠,一生一世的浪漫,化為三生三世的怨懟。940Please respect copyright.PENANAAwr6ZK5G2m
940Please respect copyright.PENANAqK3s9BGzCt
阿朗想,為什麼大人不可以堅守承諾?940Please respect copyright.PENANAQjuWCk1xxl
940Please respect copyright.PENANA8as7qGCb5v
他不解,鬰悶,想找個不認識的人傾訴、怒罵、怨唱。940Please respect copyright.PENANA4UV5q7vYue
940Please respect copyright.PENANAF7M8TfA7L5
他發誓,如果將來,他許諾和某個女子結婚,必定愛她一輩子,永不分離。940Please respect copyright.PENANAHFQx5QhVMW
940Please respect copyright.PENANAG8Q8zki50n
他不想成為自己討厭的人,不想足陷一棟眼見築起、宴賓客,但最後塌了的樓房,他已經目睹過這樣的頹垣敗瓦,對之厭惡。940Please respect copyright.PENANARNwqWrqUa3
940Please respect copyright.PENANAZIVJ045Qql
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阿朗的父母最後離婚,在法庭上大爭撫養權。940Please respect copyright.PENANARi5C7MsMOo
940Please respect copyright.PENANAOHCST6Rntc
阿朗跟隨母親,弟弟則跟了父親居住。940Please respect copyright.PENANAWvjACIa39M
940Please respect copyright.PENANAl4uOAE4SnW
父母二人即使離婚,仍然很喜歡鬥嘴,只是言語不再粗俗。每次家庭聚會,都會將阿朗和弟弟互相比較,看看誰的成績更好,仿佛這代表父母二人誰的養育更佳。940Please respect copyright.PENANAK9gX9B0VPN
940Please respect copyright.PENANAGDfA7b3aXS
二人都不服輸,令兩個兒子都不能輸;幼馬,已不停蹄。940Please respect copyright.PENANAmgRcMfcxf3
940Please respect copyright.PENANA872UfhW56L
母親將阿朗的課業牢牢看顧,要求他用功温書,不要再看五點三的叮噹卡通,足球只能在完成功課後踢。這種監督,令阿朗的成績不錯。940Please respect copyright.PENANAhsNi2msVE4
940Please respect copyright.PENANAEBgc0IwZem
但他已經受夠這種束縛。940Please respect copyright.PENANAyAMh3f1yiQ
940Please respect copyright.PENANA88efrOahSU
他莫名地覺得很煩,他是程日朗,一個活生生的人,並不是誰用來攀比的工具。940Please respect copyright.PENANA9n32wKiykB
940Please respect copyright.PENANAniLh1rbK2B
他是他,他想做自己,不想被控制,世界分明很大,即使年少仍有很多可作的事,何必只流連幾張考卷、幾個分數、幾座學業獎。940Please respect copyright.PENANAmhNZZObTZC
940Please respect copyright.PENANA6XvUnE6DD9
一直以來,他都嘗試破戒,想做一些媽媽認為「頑皮」的事,譬如無病sick leave、早戀、徹夜不歸,等等,像是澄澈心志,像是一種不言語的示威,不算轟烈,但有血有汗。940Please respect copyright.PENANAzfHPh1o5mI
940Please respect copyright.PENANAh0hzAtYC2i
他渴望媽媽知道,他絕對不是當日那個目睹父母爭吵而不知所措的孩子,他已長大。他想方設法地,意圖告訴母親,他已經成長,已經夢遺、生出恥毛、肩膀也變寬闊;已不需由母親喂食、接送、去領成績表。940Please respect copyright.PENANA2qOyuJTNWU
940Please respect copyright.PENANAEZHIfBYOsW
不果,母親太需要他。940Please respect copyright.PENANAcMtiapMBAh
940Please respect copyright.PENANApZTWOOelSJ
直至,阿朗十八歲,升大學。940Please respect copyright.PENANA4JrXuyOoEn
940Please respect copyright.PENANAcRdt9D0BR2
碰巧,母親再婚。她和阿朗的父親爭來鬥去,已經不知道意義何在,其實也沒什麼可鬥、可得、可失。她只是覺得,自己變得越來越似阿朗父親,或者是,他越來越似她;但反正,一切已無意義。940Please respect copyright.PENANA2UPuHCr9Oz
940Please respect copyright.PENANAgqNjKeX0ae
「我都唔明,點解我哋會變成咁。唔係嘅,唔係唔明,講出嚟好笑啫。明明,錢財應該係身外物嚟,但係,我真係……我只係,唔想再住喺嗰個蝸牛咁細嘅竇,同佢一齊等死。你爸爸冇咗間廠,脾氣好差,講唔夠兩句就嘈,好似已經唔愛咁;我同佢,都係。估唔到,離咗婚之後仲好聲好氣咗,哈。」940Please respect copyright.PENANALMm5EVpWcC
940Please respect copyright.PENANAkf34ctn3Yi
她想,如果不曾和丈夫享過富貴,說不定真可以堅毅地和他共患難。940Please respect copyright.PENANArIeO17H9jz
940Please respect copyright.PENANAvPqaaBgmHq
畢竟,他們都受不住落差感,慢慢地脾氣變差,耐心盡耗,磨擦漸多。怪誰?怪那場金融風暴嗎?不,這樣的話,她會瞧不起自己。940Please respect copyright.PENANAgNpf0Le7LA
940Please respect copyright.PENANAwPf5jr4kHE
到底,沒有如果。如今,她要過新生活。940Please respect copyright.PENANAHdciAaspBw
940Please respect copyright.PENANAT0fwSxNwjj
「你都大個仔啦,我就唔再管你咁多。以後生生性性,俾心機讀書啦!」940Please respect copyright.PENANAYbxFLxwflg
940Please respect copyright.PENANAZFbGUGpTUC
阿朗覺得自由自在。940Please respect copyright.PENANAdFmjCUV79M
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所以,他想放縱。940Please respect copyright.PENANAntMsvo2aja
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他很享受這種不受管束的、快樂的自由。940Please respect copyright.PENANAz0iq1JfPsD
940Please respect copyright.PENANAs8sGl9QHal
他不再認真聽課,時常走堂,走去離校園甚遠的地方食飯,順便到網吧打機,逃離讀書的魔咒。如果思思不滿,他也肯乖乖處理課業。總之,只要他確定自己不再是小孩,不再連看電視也受限,他就舒暢。940Please respect copyright.PENANAOpKMNZenuC
940Please respect copyright.PENANA8ncNwD81hU
他想認識更大的世界,闖蕩江湖。940Please respect copyright.PENANANmwbdSRuOQ
940Please respect copyright.PENANAU6A2VHmaDm
不撇下思思。940Please respect copyright.PENANApFCc2ZkTdO
940Please respect copyright.PENANAcqw9DLERJk
阿朗第一眼見思思,就覺得她的氣質很特別,很清冷,像薄霧一樣。940Please respect copyright.PENANA9On5Cql98w
940Please respect copyright.PENANAgQXHsSqAxa
當時,他有預感,他們是很不一樣的人。940Please respect copyright.PENANA2vN1V9FwWI
940Please respect copyright.PENANA5nUKSNyBvG
無論如何,他會以她為先。940Please respect copyright.PENANAIrbz7CyfjL
940Please respect copyright.PENANAZDHqhNIwoD
他肯定,他與那些大人不一樣。940Please respect copyright.PENANAfVQfpUiy18
940Please respect copyright.PENANAOKSUbnkYeY
他承諾,絕不食言。940Please respect copyright.PENANAlIqz3df055
(喜歡的話可以按按喜歡鼓勵一下~!)940Please respect copyright.PENANAp3KLavMLQR
940Please respect copyright.PENANA3foQxIp9bP