第五十九.五章713Please respect copyright.PENANAV5xXIPOqiy
713Please respect copyright.PENANAGht4z7uwxO
「何鵬侑,其實你對我仲有無感覺?」713Please respect copyright.PENANAje03mUJ7kM
我終於都決定要問一次,這一個一直埋藏在我心底裡的問題。713Please respect copyright.PENANA0hpEzRuxQ8
713Please respect copyright.PENANAn7RrqAKHXm
我已經拖延了Alvin不少時間了,他可是還要回去為姐姐買晚飯的。713Please respect copyright.PENANAXGwPkhUOtP
雖然心裡是這樣想著,但我還是把他從醫院帶來了車站,再由車站從帶到來了現在暫住的家樓下。713Please respect copyright.PENANAjIQJsvLWPy
原因就只是希望能夠問道他這一條問題……713Please respect copyright.PENANAdWU9N4Dts7
713Please respect copyright.PENANA8pz1cRATIo
但當我問完後,只見Alvin思考了一會。713Please respect copyright.PENANAOtT9aPydQ8
拜託,你一定要回答「已經放下了我」。713Please respect copyright.PENANAxMSwvxVdiR
這樣我才能夠有藉口都讓自己放下你的……713Please respect copyright.PENANA6j0FfYLgyo
713Please respect copyright.PENANAtj1EQQe7id
「你要我老實答嘅話,喺仲有感覺。」他思考完後,就看著我說。713Please respect copyright.PENANAu38Nl7Jsc0
聽到他這一個答案,我的大腦頓時如同電腦當了機一樣。713Please respect copyright.PENANAOOxj8yUaxL
他這個答案,完全打亂了我原先預定好要與他說的話……713Please respect copyright.PENANAWEz2oF1eQJ
713Please respect copyright.PENANAd4PXgB7vky
我初初是希望他會回答我「已經放下了」。713Please respect copyright.PENANAj4Qly7hcDV
然後我就可以順勢假裝自己都放下,並與他再一次由「朋友」的關係,重新再來一次。713Please respect copyright.PENANAuzx1wuT807
但現在他竟然直接回答我「還有感覺」……713Please respect copyright.PENANAb9pqZKUXEA
713Please respect copyright.PENANAaONYBr7lzi
單單就是這一句,就足夠令我已經很想立即走進他懷中,然後跟他說,其實我都一樣還沒有放下……713Please respect copyright.PENANAxC1IB6pAdK
雖然感性上,我真的想與他再一起。713Please respect copyright.PENANAkILnxSlMk7
但理性上告訴了我,一開始令他失望及傷心的人……是我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAFasOFlv1nG
即使我知道一切都已經過去了……713Please respect copyright.PENANA28nR1k4RdM
但是曾經的傷痕裂縫,是沒法輕易就能填補得到的。713Please respect copyright.PENANAdwS0aHHb03
我或許已經沒有資格,在他的心裡再佔上一格。713Please respect copyright.PENANAiVgpjy6ILx
我更不能再在他的心裡刻上第二條傷痕……713Please respect copyright.PENANAH2YnxJz0Yf
713Please respect copyright.PENANAqZoqRcQwkB
但是這刻情緒已經有一點開始湧現出來。713Please respect copyright.PENANALCBXEvn0QQ
然而,我都一定要假裝冷靜,不能讓他看穿我此刻的情緒。713Please respect copyright.PENANAyG84FllkPh
於是我便深呼吸了一下,然後說:「都過咗成年啦……點會仲有感覺架……」713Please respect copyright.PENANAcaS8r18zI2
我說著的時候,心裡其實都一陣隱隱作痛。713Please respect copyright.PENANARVq8Zvp7mF
713Please respect copyright.PENANAf2KD0fzFWB
「原先都無乜架啦,但同你相遇翻之後,個感覺即刻出翻哂嚟。」713Please respect copyright.PENANAUKvJwhFoc9
他回答著我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAS96LLSv6Pl
為何你一定要說這些說話呢……713Please respect copyright.PENANAgum9QGSlWW
713Please respect copyright.PENANA0nFQOJ7Dq6
雖然心裡很難受,但我自己弄出來的問題,就必須由我自己來解決。713Please respect copyright.PENANA4ul7a6dbOc
「問題就喺呢到啦!」我立即回應他。713Please respect copyright.PENANAAGOWZf3Bmj
而他都很快就看著我問:「問題?」713Please respect copyright.PENANAGUsy5sDt49
713Please respect copyright.PENANA9CZ9NqTTif
「我哋依家嘅身份仲喺前男女朋友,所以一見翻臉就自然會咩感覺都出翻哂嚟……明明大家都已經分咗手成年,但你仲喺好似move on唔到咁。」713Please respect copyright.PENANAyjfgs8zwfg
我都不知道自己正在亂說著甚麼……但我說完後,就立即轉身背向著他。713Please respect copyright.PENANAGOYTSSz6hN
因為我真的開始壓抑不住心中一直不斷湧現著的情緒了……713Please respect copyright.PENANAGUk2WhacpK
每當我說一句與心相反的說話,我就變得更難受了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAynglRXPZgo
713Please respect copyright.PENANA8PcsavWbEI
「你咁樣講,好似講到自己已經放低咗咁。」他又回應了我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAaqU8j5LQS0
原來你認為我已經將你放下了嗎……713Please respect copyright.PENANANRsTjigBot
雖然,心真的很痛,但既然已經決定了,我就必須繼續演下去。713Please respect copyright.PENANA2xcpzmC1Sy
713Please respect copyright.PENANABH7kPyW9eV
「我……放低咗架啦!」我說道。713Please respect copyright.PENANAycriKAReXQ
但這時候,淚水都終於壓抑不住,從雙眼開始流下來。713Please respect copyright.PENANAcO2iw2SVhi
對不起……我撒謊了,但這都是為了你好。713Please respect copyright.PENANA4qpIpgj3Jv
713Please respect copyright.PENANAouhRXU4qBI
「喺啊……你放低到咪好囉……唔似我咁。」他回答我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAAqRmdBAuVg
拜託不要再說這些說話了……713Please respect copyright.PENANATjilyDoi6Y
713Please respect copyright.PENANAMlumt3S7ZH
此刻,聽完他的說話後,我的心真很痛,很痛,很痛。713Please respect copyright.PENANAv2Rir1JpiH
但是我還得繼續演下去……713Please respect copyright.PENANAvBfDlDw6dS
於是我強忍著眼淚,並轉身看著他。713Please respect copyright.PENANAxtkqHub6V8
713Please respect copyright.PENANA2rNBZDjmS6
幸好,這時旁邊的的路燈剛好因時限而熄滅了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAKhRZjnqyGF
這麼暗的環境,他應該是看不到我的表情的……713Please respect copyright.PENANAeZ8nhYOhpW
於是我便立即向他說道:「所以我覺得點解有時我哋喺班房到會有啲尷尬就喺因為我哋身份嘅問題。」713Please respect copyright.PENANAjxpnz4viM5
句子之間完全沒有停頓,因為一停頓下來,我就會又想哭了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAUnTZel9oqY
713Please respect copyright.PENANATCq4pctkPH
「身份嘅問題?」他問道我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAsg6lYOOXZO
「你仲覺得我喺你前女朋友,所以有時喺交流上先會有啲尷尬……你應該好似我咁放低哂,然後就以一個新嘅身份去面對你!」713Please respect copyright.PENANA3mSr1iJLaV
我看似很有道理地說著。713Please respect copyright.PENANAlmdVijzm88
但其實我根本就沒有放下過對他的感情。713Please respect copyright.PENANACbum0BZOl2
713Please respect copyright.PENANAktqSYUwYSz
接著,Alvin竟然沒有回應我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAXV4bJw31yQ
於是我都只好繼續說:「不如我哋重新嚟過,唔喺曾經嘅戀人,唔喺前男女朋友,而喺重新由朋友呢個關係再開始過。」713Please respect copyright.PENANArwdYCGI5MI
本來這一句說話,是打算一開始在他回答我「已經放下了」後,就接著說的。713Please respect copyright.PENANA6KSm4nEfGJ
713Please respect copyright.PENANAuOsZYwoF1A
713Please respect copyright.PENANATQ3uTM3gRv
雖然我都希望我們能從「朋友」再重新開始過。713Please respect copyright.PENANAUjStwHkGTH
但至少都讓我有一個藉口去先放下對你的感情吧……713Please respect copyright.PENANAukcr3Ciqnx
現在這樣反而讓我更不想去放下對你的感情了……713Please respect copyright.PENANAil6ftvfd9R
713Please respect copyright.PENANAc3ChSoFFeh
「你嘅意思即喺我哋做翻朋友,好似啲典型嘅分手對白咁。」他又開口說道了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAwyb7kWxp3c
「咁唔好咩?你又可以放低我,而我哋又可以繼續正正常常咁交流……」713Please respect copyright.PENANAqQDzOagk4O
這對現在的我們來說,應該是最好的解決方法了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAUQ81vyOkKX
713Please respect copyright.PENANAlEcbtL6kGC
接著Alvin都沉默了一會,看來他都應該是在思考著這個唯一的解決方法。713Please respect copyright.PENANAPlcOVYR9me
而很快,他都彷彿想通了一樣開口說:「好啦,我哋做翻朋友啦咁!由今日起,我哋就只喺朋友。」713Please respect copyright.PENANA086bxscR24
713Please respect copyright.PENANAnAg5PuxWGH
當我聽到他說我們只是朋友時,我就知道「何鵬侑與蔡霜玥」這段關係,在這一瞬間……完結了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAJenkOoiTx2
雖然這本來就是我的目的,但為何當我聽到他所說後,我反而更難過……713Please respect copyright.PENANATFInshzfmw
713Please respect copyright.PENANAj7VyPfZmnN
我的眼淚又開始從雙眼流下。713Please respect copyright.PENANA4yxAbiDqAg
但現在與他這麼近的距離,他一定會看得見我臉上的淚水。713Please respect copyright.PENANAIgt4PII2Y5
713Please respect copyright.PENANAuJvzk1HFnr
因此,我只好立即轉身,並強忍著淚水說:「好啦……時間唔早啦,你……快啲翻去買飯比家姐啦,我都要上翻去煮自己份晚餐啦!」713Please respect copyright.PENANAhRg8SPMknq
接著,我就背向著他揮手,並往前面的方向跑去。713Please respect copyright.PENANAqDlfKOscuM
我必須離開他,因為我實在不能再忍耐下去了。713Please respect copyright.PENANA7fs7KjkBjY
再這樣下去,我一定會在他面前痛哭出來的……713Please respect copyright.PENANATAKYypcVEY
我不想他後悔。713Please respect copyright.PENANArcoVesO7yx
713Please respect copyright.PENANAoJAVYYMFDk
我跑著的時候,並沒有理會身後的Alvin是站著還是轉身離開了。713Please respect copyright.PENANAAjQ0pdioSZ
淚水已經不斷從雙眼滲出,而我都只能加快腳步走回家中。713Please respect copyright.PENANAM2QueiExbo
713Please respect copyright.PENANA16qE7bZbyS
接著,當我成功回到家,打開了門進到屋內,並閉上門的一剎那……713Please respect copyright.PENANAqbZ4MEAwxt
我直接跪在地上,大聲地哭起來……713Please respect copyright.PENANAAbhcUWvmUF
對上一次,我會這樣大聲哭出來,應該是與Alvin提出分手後……713Please respect copyright.PENANAFf3QspULBF
713Please respect copyright.PENANAhY1aqTNFEF
「好痛,好痛,好痛……」我哭著的同時一直說著。713Please respect copyright.PENANAMmcCIzR43Z
這一刻,並沒有任何人能在我身邊能夠安慰及陪伴著我。713Please respect copyright.PENANAu1s9AcJ9zQ
而我都只能一直痛哭著,直到淚水流乾涸為止……713Please respect copyright.PENANA8O5eGyyfzN
713Please respect copyright.PENANAO8W9EViXR9
對不起,何鵬侑,是我親手摧毀了我們這一段感情的。713Please respect copyright.PENANAgHYLrmsm2X
過去你所認識的蔡霜玥,將不再存在。713Please respect copyright.PENANA5cNbQIhXRG
而接下來的蔡霜玥,都只會與你以「朋友」的身份繼續相處。713Please respect copyright.PENANAiqr1h8WC9n