~Jeremy~
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“um… and um… um… are you still married to Morin… no Mary? …or I don't know what Mary something… pff what's her name again?'
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'' What what ?''
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"...um the name o-of...your...oh my god I never thought I'd say that one day...your wife?"
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"Marylin! Yes I am STILL happy in a fruitful and fulfilled marriage.
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We had decided, at least <<I>> had decided to come and rest and have lunch since the dolt sitting in front of me had refused the only source of sustenance that the other psycho minister at least feigned hospitality to offer. Rather, I hoped to find some semblance of calm by this lake and bring my heart back to normal, which never tired of drumming at the call of the grim reaper but oh no, this imbecile, THIS IMBECILE! He had to decide to drag my leash like I was just a damn stray dog to keep an eye on.
I hoped that those vapes of wind that swept beneath the litany of strangely irascible clouds were enough to drown out the verses of excitement that formed in my stomach every time his voice... his voice rocked my hearing.
My throat constricted all the hot flashes that my lungs could no longer dispatch. I was choking on the smell of his cologne, and in that moment…in that moment…knowing that he was running his pinkish tongue over the sides of his lip to hide his embarrassment at feeling silly to be there, there with me, casting a vague gaze on the friezes of the drowsy lake and rethinking his new action to rob from me a loving reaction , could have granted me an aneurism. I felt everything I shouldn't have felt. I felt his palms rubbing in embarrassment, begging for a cordial response from between the thin crevices of my lips fantasizing his, his legs slapping together in his tight jeans, the feint of sweat which was generated one last time in a race on the delicate straight line of his pointed nose, his hair which twirled with the ardor of the wind, his feet in a trance scraping the tiles of the terrace for fear that I would abandon him... a second time. I felt the breath fly away and my stomach repudiate the food I forced into it every time he cried out for a breath. And my heart danced with joy at being able to steal back the sighs that he graciously expired. I don't know what the heck is happening to this retarded brain of mine again but IT NEEDS TO FUCKING STOP FOR GOD'S SAKE!43Please respect copyright.PENANA4Ph1VFUt38
If I avoid meeting his gaze and continue on ignoring him, everything will be fine… Jemy keep your head down, concentrate… Wait! why am I even calling myself with this nickname? The hell is he doing to me?
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"Right...you are...happy? Happy is a word you love to throw around, isn't it? Happy…What did I expect_ he slammed his teeth in a bitter laugh_ well then I’m happy for you too. You are, HAPPY… it shows in the pounds you have gained in the meantime’’43Please respect copyright.PENANA5nvhWsYsva
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Ouch he's hitting the bull's eye there, but I better ignore...43Please respect copyright.PENANAYo1UxR7AGc
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“Me… I am not HAPPY. No I'm not… HAPPY. Aurora is dead. Two years ago, from acute endometriosis… happy right? I'M A FUCKING WIDOWER…and no I'm so not happy about it!”
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''OK''
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"Please don't start pitying me! I'm just-''43Please respect copyright.PENANA6xVVMqmVuR
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''I only said OK! I don't give a fuck! Besides, I doubt you liked that lady anyway, I bet you were wasting your time fucking all the available asses back in Florida and tumbling New York drag queens while the poor thing rotted like an old cotton sack on her shitty bed death. I don't give two fucks about you being a widower.”
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The parades of lightning in the progressively funerary sky that sheltered deaf thunders in fury were the only remnants of nuisance that remained of our conversation. I was trying to keep my full attention on the swollen flour that those stupid niggers call bread and him... well, I don't know. As long as I avoid his gaze and ignore him everything will be fine, right? Right!43Please respect copyright.PENANAmXDiMFKcx4
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"It's just weird how the weather got this dark today-"43Please respect copyright.PENANAvNaph0ptuE
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I took a long breath before stopping him. I needed to put an end to this annoying conversation and free the both of us from the embarrassment.
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“Listen Ken-um um_ I pretended to cough_ Kendrick, you didn’t follow me here to tell me about the weather…”
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"It's not like you want me to talk to you whatsoever to begin with…I want- Jemy, I just want us to-“43Please respect copyright.PENANAp9NZKYZzrk
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"WANT US TO WHAT HUH? THAT I LET YOU JUMP ME LIKE THOSE BASTARD FAGS YOU'RE BENDING?! WHAT US TO WHAT KEN ''
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I did not want to draw attention but these assaults of victim pity party will make me punch the hell out of his handsome face.
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‘’We…we..I..’’
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"Weweayeayeaye, are you a monkey now? Don't you know how to form some good fucking sentences anymore?!'’
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‘I JUST WANT US TO BE IN FUCKING GOOD TERMS AGAIN! I just want us to be friends again, at least like before this whole thing happened and our families pushed us apart and your mom died…and, and I believe, I believe it's still possible... You even called me Ken... We're old enough not to run after each other like when we were sixteen Jemy…I think we could just be friends Jemy.. I miss the ones we used to be''
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What I feared the most and would have given my head to the stake for this not to happen… his hands were lazy on mine and the strawberry cologne that powdered them led me directly to the hazelnuts that were waltzing in a milky fury. I could see the boiling of emotions, a bacchus of pain, of affection that was exploding in the faith of his irises that time had resisted riding. It was as if my disgust for what he had been for the past few years had evaporated. He was a nightmare that I was beginning to dream about. And then I saw this tattoo...
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"You-You...Ken, did you keep it...?"
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“It was the last sign left of us two, I wish I hadn’t died without remembering you one last time…”
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"What are you talking about?"
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"Love sometimes get us a second chance at living... Remember? We did it the first time I intervened-“
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"The first time I loved you... as my friend for sure"
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"Your step-mom had you chained to the garden lights and I was so mad that I had kidnapped all your farmyard hens-"
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“OH MY GOD, you were already a rebel since you were little… I remember how you killed one and broke into her room and smeared her fucking wedding dress with chicken blood… LIKE HOW DID YOU GET IN OUR HOME?! You were such a psycho!'
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“And then I spilled all the bleach acid in the vegetable soup she had made for dinner with my dad…ouuh I remember when our parents had been rushed to the ER for food poisoning”
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“And then we both fled to hide in our cabin in the forest”
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"And then we fought over who was going to sleep on the bed and who was going to sleep on the floor."
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"Actually, I had won but I was such a good friend that I let you take the bed"
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"Oh yes that's it, said the gentleman who had muscles as thin as a fishbone"
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''Ohhh we're playing this now, I remind you that it's the gentleman with muscles as thin as the fishbone that you fell in love with and for whom you got yelled at for two weeks for a tattoo made with gooseblood''
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and we could no longer hold back that we convulsed in the laughter that the memories intoxicated the hopes that freed themselves from the depths
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"yes...this is the guy I fell in love with and think I'll always be? <<Dear little Jemy-chick>> is what the tattoo says. I used to think I could protect you against any harm. When I saw you chained to wood lamps for a stupidity that any teenager would do I swore to protect you... And I came back for the same reason... But I don't know if it's worth it anymore... If it was worth accepting the trade…”
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The drunken winter wind had swept my limbs but every second I spurred on my course in a fit of laughter, my hands clinging to his, the brown shirtless boy. The timid noises of the animals blended with the groans of the approaching shadows. The brave birds to defy the cold weather revered the moon and prevented its light from penetrating the dark paths for us not to turn back. the foliage of the sectarian trees which engulfed each other, the black, the black of this forest. Nothing seemed to stop us. We just wanted to escape the fury of my parents. My body still hasn't gotten used to the scars my mom's clothes iron left on my thigh after I accidentally damaged her wedding frame. My memory had not yet expelled Mom's growing smile as she applied the hot iron with maternal slowness to my burning flesh. We thought if they found us I would die and Ken promised me I would live…
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‘’Jemy... I just want you to-“
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"Ken... I can't... I'm so sorry... I don't know, you can't talk about love... I don't know-"43Please respect copyright.PENANAT27lrZklvS
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''UHM UHM!”
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I was about to make a mistake, his eyes had made me forget for a hot minute all the women I had planned to fuck and Marylin, to whom I had promised to change. But before saying something probably stupid someone interrupted us. And immediately, the hairs on my arm bristle with stupor. His face literally melted into a poisonous black larva with every blow of wind in his direction. His skin was crippled by black lumps, acrochordons scraped his visible skin that he had not covered in his strange black suit tunic. Then he starts to open his mouth, OH MY GOD, his tongue wrinkled in a long, endless cascading palisade and his eyes, they were like the driver's this morning, clad in an almost unhuman black. He waved goodbye, or hello, I don't know, but his fingers were so long they weren't real. They were barely noticeable and at the same time barely concealable. Before he said a thing, his teeth were full of larva melting
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"Your time is already up Jeremy!"
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"JEMY! JEMY!”
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"OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK!" I jumped out of my trance, he was gone.
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"Jemy, what is it?"
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"You..Y-You n-didn't see it? He was tall, with a melting face, he had no white spots in his...Ken you? You've seen it haven't you? His teeth were falling out of his jaw. He..he''
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"Jemy...oh calm down, there was nothing, you just got lost in your thoughts and-"
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“Sir your bill…”
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"WHAT THE HELL?" YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME''
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I was so scared of his occurrence that I sent my fist to eat him in the face. They're a bunch of wizards around here... What the fuck is happening?
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"JEMY! ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? OH MY GOD !''43Please respect copyright.PENANAek54gtjR1N
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"Sorry sir I don't know what's happening to him but I can handle the bill, sorry, sorry, sorry-"
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''NO NO NO LET'S GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!”
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The waiter who had collapsed on the ground following my blow immediately turned around and just like with the other frightening sort of a man, the whites of his eyes had disappeared to give way to a funeral blackness.
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"Remember Jeremy, your time is up!"
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I couldn't help but kick my hardest in his stomach
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‘BUT WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU JEMY? ARE YOU GOING TO FUCKING KILL THE GUY?'
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"But he... He... was... He got..."
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"THERE NOTHING JEMY... Dude passed out after your first punch why are you giving him a second one, what's wrong with your slow ass brain?"
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"He...he...SHUT THE FUCK UP KEN, LEAVE ME ALONE!"
and then I ran away with all I could.
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