Ben612Please respect copyright.PENANAcC0tvPhhZv
612Please respect copyright.PENANAom1Vt4trfh
February 14, 2005
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Same day
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I see her across the room. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAt6EIdzn2YU
612Please respect copyright.PENANADJddC5kcPQ
Of course I see her.612Please respect copyright.PENANAkoAorESPGW
I always see her.612Please respect copyright.PENANA29dwZ9wSjg
And she's just as fucking beautiful as always. Maybe even more so.612Please respect copyright.PENANAWG3ahzjtTP
Damn it.612Please respect copyright.PENANAAz6xqYlwAD
I need to stop looking at her. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAr4YRzvoS8P
This is fucking Valentine's Day. The Holiday for desperate chicks, so why the fuck am I sitting here alone?612Please respect copyright.PENANAXQelROGUpn
You already know the answer to that, you fucking idiot. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAzrC0LSAPBz
Damn it.612Please respect copyright.PENANA2sNqDNsDtm
I scan the room for the thousandth time. My gaze lands on her, like it always does. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAeRG1AG1bWu
I want her so much, it physically hurts. I couldn't think about anyone else, even if I wanted to.612Please respect copyright.PENANAtruXB5epnt
I don't want to. I want her, only her. 612Please respect copyright.PENANATdJyJ2EZS9
But I fucked it up. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAc2PYtZxJ2L
612Please respect copyright.PENANABHNrrqu6kK
Of course I fucked it up.612Please respect copyright.PENANAIDFvKKdXmp
612Please respect copyright.PENANAARyl2DAqkG
Because I'm a fucking idiot.612Please respect copyright.PENANAOYu8l2RuzA
And now she really hates me. She's been avoiding me this whole time. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAqqdD2NABfi
It feels like a fucking knife in my chest every time I see her and she's not near me.612Please respect copyright.PENANAiZkXGGEfcs
I need to touch her soft skin. I want to kiss her sexy lips. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAWwH8wqIWqE
Can lips be sexy?612Please respect copyright.PENANAsVWAdK973i
I don't know, but hers are. Everything about her is perfect. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAVmH7iiXuv3
I need her. 612Please respect copyright.PENANASmA4BgQj8i
A blonde approaches me, Karen, I think. Fuck, I don't know. Who cares. She pushes her arms up in an attempt to display more of her tits and any other time, I would have been interested.612Please respect copyright.PENANA1LD7wpRgTD
It's feels like that was another life. Everything feels so different now.612Please respect copyright.PENANABSqxm7ngfQ
"Hey Ben." She says my name like it's supposed to mean something, but I couldn't care less about what she wants.612Please respect copyright.PENANA7TrHZdRZ4Q
Oh shit, I think I may have fooled around with her before. Maybe?612Please respect copyright.PENANAVaVGOJ1yfj
"Hey, sorry, I gotta go. See you around." I stand quickly without a plan of where to go, but I figure I can hide from everyone in my room. 612Please respect copyright.PENANATOcYgMf56v
Even her.612Please respect copyright.PENANAyZhYcX2LCG
I close the door, locking everyone out and stumble to my bed in the dark. Shit, I drank too much trying to ignore the girl across the room. 612Please respect copyright.PENANA1C8gIirAJV
I feel something strange as I lay down...612Please respect copyright.PENANAaUMLiKCQIz
I'm not alone. Fuck! Who the hell is in my bed?612Please respect copyright.PENANA5Dud5xglvR
"Ben?" I hear her groggy voice and instantly relax. 612Please respect copyright.PENANA2FScbHDWkO
"Kat? What the fuck? You scared the hell out of me!" Why is she in my bed? Was she sleeping?612Please respect copyright.PENANAHCZOVJvQF2
"What are you doing here?" Her confusion coming through her scratchy voice.612Please respect copyright.PENANA5ZUlJaZ5w5
"What do you mean? In case you forgot, this is my room." I'm too amused to be irritated. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAGFfjISGMuj
"Oh." She seems to realize where she's at. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAqCIGuro4q4
"Oh." I chuckle. God, she's so fucking adorable.612Please respect copyright.PENANAA58pfEqp11
"Sorry." I can hear the embarrassment in her voice and even though I can't see her in the dark, I know she's blushing. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAisxgEfkBqX
She moves, in a hurry to get up and probably run away from the asshole that I am. I need to make her stop. I don't want her to leave.612Please respect copyright.PENANAtjceQ04p7C
"What are you doing in here, Kat?" I hope my question will be enough of a reason to stay at least a few minutes longer. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAtY6K2kJ3xL
It's not. 612Please respect copyright.PENANA5RNI4apW8C
She stands up quickly, just as a crash sounds through the room. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAz3phyuPdFv
"Oh shit! Ben, I think I knocked something over." I can hear her scurry around, feeling for whatever it was.612Please respect copyright.PENANA3ln1hfiIh6
I laugh. Nothing in my room is that important. "Don't worry about it, Kat."612Please respect copyright.PENANADSFsRBdoR3
"Don't worry about it?!? I'm pretty sure there's broken glass down here!" She's frantically feeling around. She's going to get herself hurt.612Please respect copyright.PENANAOddFq20NJH
"That's all the more reason to not feel around in the dark. Seriously, Kat. It's fine. Stop before you hurt yourself." I hear her sigh, but she stops her movement. 612Please respect copyright.PENANA74GNWHS9Ow
"Now, tell me. What were you doing laying in my bed? Not that I'm complaining." Shit, that last part wasn't supposed to come out.612Please respect copyright.PENANAEGBFTOVNIz
I feel the bed sink next to me as she sits down. "I just needed to... get away."612Please respect copyright.PENANAJvMWfeRk35
"I know the feeling." I sigh. What I don't say is I was mostly trying to get away from her.612Please respect copyright.PENANAYg9UGgOQzV
"You do? You know what it feels like for all you friends to be in happy relationships and worried about you and your sad pathetic life?" She lets out a huff. Damn. I was not expecting that.612Please respect copyright.PENANAmagUznvLWp
"Uh... Yes?" She gives a humorless chuckle and I can just see her eyes rolling. "Well, I mean, I kinda do. Actually. I guess I just never thought about it like that before."612Please respect copyright.PENANA35v2olmIRk
"Oh." Well, that shut her up, which would usually be a good thing, but I'm not sure what the fuck to say.612Please respect copyright.PENANAcXtbVu9qoR
I decide to use this moment to beg for her forgiveness. "Listen, I just want to say, I am really sorry. For everything. I know you're not a fan of starting over, but do you think maybe you could forgive me?"612Please respect copyright.PENANAonw8Q750z0
She scoffs. "Oh please, like its that easy. You don't even mean that."612Please respect copyright.PENANA4Y3sftfNnL
"I do too. More than anything. What can I do to make it up to you?" I would do just about anything she asks, I just hope she does forgive me.612Please respect copyright.PENANAYVYZLsuEF0
"Nothing. There's nothing... at... all... Wait! I have an idea." I can hear the smile in her voice. Oh shit, why do I feel so nervous?612Please respect copyright.PENANAAMSbU5osYX
She keeps talking, not waiting for my response. "Okay! Just hear me out before you say anything. Okay?"612Please respect copyright.PENANAVes5Gm7uS1
Again, I couldn't get a word in before she barrels on. "Okay. So, I think we should date."612Please respect copyright.PENANAipdlrXnrOs
I can't stop the sound that erupts from my chest. It's somewhere between a laugh and a choking sound. I'm so in shock that my body has broken.612Please respect copyright.PENANA1P1n59eqcG
"I-uh... You-what?" Words. What are words? 612Please respect copyright.PENANAVsYdXpCemX
"Okay, before you shut me down." I wasn't going to. "It's not real. We can just pretend to date."612Please respect copyright.PENANAzWnkU8lKlp
"Why the fuck would we do that?" Okay, now I'm really confused.612Please respect copyright.PENANAAwhKZ05jEo
"Because I really need this. And you said anything!" She throws my words back in my face.612Please respect copyright.PENANA24LfLwWR7M
I groan and rub my hands down my face. What the fuck did I just get myself in to? 612Please respect copyright.PENANAR5lg33odAD
"Okay, okay. Just give me a minute... to... to..." To what? What the fuck is there to think about? I can't say no. "Just give me a minute to process... all of this."612Please respect copyright.PENANAotvpe1sXHa
"Sure, take your time." I feel her shift on the bed as she lays down. 612Please respect copyright.PENANA8tiV6SCyuN
"Make yourself at home." I half joke, because I honestly don't mind her laying in my bed.612Please respect copyright.PENANABhl2xOcuOf
She just giggles, stretching out to get comfortable. Damn. I really missed that sound. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAvMKTe5S7yo
I missed everything about her.612Please respect copyright.PENANAWT1tdLtj1H
I'm going to have to do this. Pretend to be with the girl that I can't stop thinking about. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAN06JnE28bD
Shouldn't be too hard to fake feelings, it's the keeping them fake part that's going to be a struggle. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAQpfseMUv28
"Why exactly do you need this?" I have a right to know why we are doing this, don't l?612Please respect copyright.PENANAHvOxurkTtP
She sighs. "Does it really matter?" 612Please respect copyright.PENANAzZVqaciD2V
"Before I agree to your crazy scheme, I need to know why we are doing it in the first place." Why can't it just be real? Of course, I don't say that out loud because I'm a huge pussy.612Please respect copyright.PENANAwu3rNxW0pq
"Okay, fair enough. Everyone has been treating me like I'm fragile since the whole... you know... happened." I lay down next to her on my back.612Please respect copyright.PENANALRSDSq3V3D
"The whole you know?" I'm completely confused. What the fuck is she talking about? 612Please respect copyright.PENANAdMJH0mia8F
"You know... New Year's Eve?" She sounds embarrassed, but I still don't understand.612Please respect copyright.PENANAFCO8oWNXoB
"Why would they treat you differently because of that?" Maybe I'm missing something?612Please respect copyright.PENANAgRyg9KcUC8
"Uh... because of... what happened... with you." Shit. This is all because of me? 612Please respect copyright.PENANAAZnDQAFz9Y
"Oh... I didn't... I didn't know." I can't believe she has been struggling and it's all my fault.612Please respect copyright.PENANADP1d2HcVa8
"So uhm... Yeah... They act like I'm going to break, so I'm sick of being pitied and worried about and I just want to be normal... And you can help with that. Two birds, one stone. You know?"612Please respect copyright.PENANAwaI5UOSghW
"Uh, am I the birds or the stones here?" I chuckle. She's so weird sometimes. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAU1olrXj25c
She laughs. "Well, I guess the stone."612Please respect copyright.PENANA5hwfMzGFJ3
"Okay, so what are the birds?" I'm barely able to hold my laughter in to get the sentence out.612Please respect copyright.PENANAhKIWaahcKy
"Wait. No. That's wrong. You're a bird!" She sounds excited, like she's made a huge discovery or something.612Please respect copyright.PENANAnhsEOEVQmv
"So... I'm a bird now?" Seriously... She is the most adorable person I know.612Please respect copyright.PENANAUXzw9ahHtc
"Okay, everyone is worried about me because they think you broke my heart or whatever. So, bird one is you. And everyone pities me because I'm single. So, being a pathetic loser is bird two."612Please respect copyright.PENANAZJ00MGQk5a
I turn on my side to face her. "You are not a pathetic loser." Completely ignoring the fact she said I broke her heart.612Please respect copyright.PENANAgEbkF93P6l
"I most certainly am. That's why I need this. If I can just throw the stone of our fake relationship at the birds, everything will be okay." Exhaustion fills her voice as she turns to face me. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAOytOQYxcFn
I can't help but notice we are only inches apart. I can feel her breath on my face. If I leaned forward a fraction of an inch, our noses would be touching. 612Please respect copyright.PENANA8pAAW2MJ5q
Shit. This is bad. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAbB8IFF95Q3
Faking it is going to be so hard. 612Please respect copyright.PENANAsvrR3CV1WX
"So... What do you say, Little Birdie? You in?" Her laugh echoing into the core of my being, reverberating and filling my chest.
I find her hand and pull it to my face, placing a kiss on it. "Let's throw that rock."612Please respect copyright.PENANAES1bink7Jl
I am so fucked.
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