Ben768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFU8MJ63LEq
768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOIaEEnFr7m
February 14, 2005
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Same day
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I see her across the room. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGs71zAynHe
768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFSrTROBCs
Of course I see her.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr58rs4ZDSd
I always see her.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡujbONSWTHp
And she's just as fucking beautiful as always. Maybe even more so.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTm7RL7BGHl
Damn it.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNhZHrPzBTc
I need to stop looking at her. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOIOsQxD6j
This is fucking Valentine's Day. The Holiday for desperate chicks, so why the fuck am I sitting here alone?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡacyPeQ06v1
You already know the answer to that, you fucking idiot. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Dl8ptgKfJ
Damn it.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PPDbwXlL3
I scan the room for the thousandth time. My gaze lands on her, like it always does. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmxcYkc02V8
I want her so much, it physically hurts. I couldn't think about anyone else, even if I wanted to.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvxBU77n0W
I don't want to. I want her, only her. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSiLLO0MVn
But I fucked it up. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7YIKF9qrH
768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAHgiGcPko
Of course I fucked it up.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpalYZkQ3t
768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqjuYBA6fyJ
Because I'm a fucking idiot.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODUoF2APLi
And now she really hates me. She's been avoiding me this whole time. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaTQWa3VVLO
It feels like a fucking knife in my chest every time I see her and she's not near me.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zz5YbiEZU
I need to touch her soft skin. I want to kiss her sexy lips. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBMntAIzGV
Can lips be sexy?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOL7tNjVlEF
I don't know, but hers are. Everything about her is perfect. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhqpDukEujV
I need her. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Gh4naLDin
A blonde approaches me, Karen, I think. Fuck, I don't know. Who cares. She pushes her arms up in an attempt to display more of her tits and any other time, I would have been interested.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsrLzFHDH1P
It's feels like that was another life. Everything feels so different now.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJSJu0OLd1
"Hey Ben." She says my name like it's supposed to mean something, but I couldn't care less about what she wants.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBoziAHhYMN
Oh shit, I think I may have fooled around with her before. Maybe?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzC8d3oCMB
"Hey, sorry, I gotta go. See you around." I stand quickly without a plan of where to go, but I figure I can hide from everyone in my room. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRuAOCZ7V4
Even her.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRisU1Vri3
I close the door, locking everyone out and stumble to my bed in the dark. Shit, I drank too much trying to ignore the girl across the room. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCP2JZjQTFb
I feel something strange as I lay down...768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrs3JSoJmDi
I'm not alone. Fuck! Who the hell is in my bed?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XI1A8Xw5K
"Ben?" I hear her groggy voice and instantly relax. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUdIO9F7cX
"Kat? What the fuck? You scared the hell out of me!" Why is she in my bed? Was she sleeping?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcoyp1XNCR4
"What are you doing here?" Her confusion coming through her scratchy voice.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVYBtfbcLU
"What do you mean? In case you forgot, this is my room." I'm too amused to be irritated. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡizZjXd26dI
"Oh." She seems to realize where she's at. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3ppSgx43f
"Oh." I chuckle. God, she's so fucking adorable.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1LqdJHPsiQ
"Sorry." I can hear the embarrassment in her voice and even though I can't see her in the dark, I know she's blushing. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ7oM5uaNAf
She moves, in a hurry to get up and probably run away from the asshole that I am. I need to make her stop. I don't want her to leave.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD893n0ftSa
"What are you doing in here, Kat?" I hope my question will be enough of a reason to stay at least a few minutes longer. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMF6AbOz4sE
It's not. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1a38HI8AHh
She stands up quickly, just as a crash sounds through the room. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqFp4Z9cKy
"Oh shit! Ben, I think I knocked something over." I can hear her scurry around, feeling for whatever it was.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW64YM1FmuW
I laugh. Nothing in my room is that important. "Don't worry about it, Kat."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGfAOb3HYc
"Don't worry about it?!? I'm pretty sure there's broken glass down here!" She's frantically feeling around. She's going to get herself hurt.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINflFRTYK6
"That's all the more reason to not feel around in the dark. Seriously, Kat. It's fine. Stop before you hurt yourself." I hear her sigh, but she stops her movement. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZUV1uMZUQ
"Now, tell me. What were you doing laying in my bed? Not that I'm complaining." Shit, that last part wasn't supposed to come out.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTrVfnBNi9I
I feel the bed sink next to me as she sits down. "I just needed to... get away."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlntko3jdVk
"I know the feeling." I sigh. What I don't say is I was mostly trying to get away from her.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1W9XDa5ATd
"You do? You know what it feels like for all you friends to be in happy relationships and worried about you and your sad pathetic life?" She lets out a huff. Damn. I was not expecting that.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjX3eD32aa0
"Uh... Yes?" She gives a humorless chuckle and I can just see her eyes rolling. "Well, I mean, I kinda do. Actually. I guess I just never thought about it like that before."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd0MjwVpfWK
"Oh." Well, that shut her up, which would usually be a good thing, but I'm not sure what the fuck to say.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBRFR9ZmpvM
I decide to use this moment to beg for her forgiveness. "Listen, I just want to say, I am really sorry. For everything. I know you're not a fan of starting over, but do you think maybe you could forgive me?"768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYXaqioKUEI
She scoffs. "Oh please, like its that easy. You don't even mean that."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9cRklOgdSg
"I do too. More than anything. What can I do to make it up to you?" I would do just about anything she asks, I just hope she does forgive me.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrM2bLt0IdH
"Nothing. There's nothing... at... all... Wait! I have an idea." I can hear the smile in her voice. Oh shit, why do I feel so nervous?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWyuABmNA5
She keeps talking, not waiting for my response. "Okay! Just hear me out before you say anything. Okay?"768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXgTMB4Kqpm
Again, I couldn't get a word in before she barrels on. "Okay. So, I think we should date."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTSwzbbyaMP
I can't stop the sound that erupts from my chest. It's somewhere between a laugh and a choking sound. I'm so in shock that my body has broken.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAZlepkwWd
"I-uh... You-what?" Words. What are words? 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGFwyMVZu2A
"Okay, before you shut me down." I wasn't going to. "It's not real. We can just pretend to date."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoKbr2MDd2J
"Why the fuck would we do that?" Okay, now I'm really confused.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa687VWZGkY
"Because I really need this. And you said anything!" She throws my words back in my face.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWI8NfglIyb
I groan and rub my hands down my face. What the fuck did I just get myself in to? 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97xy1KqPY0
"Okay, okay. Just give me a minute... to... to..." To what? What the fuck is there to think about? I can't say no. "Just give me a minute to process... all of this."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7S9R2tpv9U
"Sure, take your time." I feel her shift on the bed as she lays down. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvh38CskfK7
"Make yourself at home." I half joke, because I honestly don't mind her laying in my bed.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5W0JvIi0c
She just giggles, stretching out to get comfortable. Damn. I really missed that sound. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vx5c91uku
I missed everything about her.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3zvQhUwml
I'm going to have to do this. Pretend to be with the girl that I can't stop thinking about. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCHU5LpTvm2
Shouldn't be too hard to fake feelings, it's the keeping them fake part that's going to be a struggle. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJz7G6EYBD
"Why exactly do you need this?" I have a right to know why we are doing this, don't l?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3CIzDroBZS
She sighs. "Does it really matter?" 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8Bf5GjPxd
"Before I agree to your crazy scheme, I need to know why we are doing it in the first place." Why can't it just be real? Of course, I don't say that out loud because I'm a huge pussy.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDoqyT1qxBT
"Okay, fair enough. Everyone has been treating me like I'm fragile since the whole... you know... happened." I lay down next to her on my back.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrgZNRdwrY
"The whole you know?" I'm completely confused. What the fuck is she talking about? 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpivly4qakO
"You know... New Year's Eve?" She sounds embarrassed, but I still don't understand.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRGOfxsfym
"Why would they treat you differently because of that?" Maybe I'm missing something?768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7urR1pTEi
"Uh... because of... what happened... with you." Shit. This is all because of me? 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UWdJOoKdW
"Oh... I didn't... I didn't know." I can't believe she has been struggling and it's all my fault.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb8a47WBzPf
"So uhm... Yeah... They act like I'm going to break, so I'm sick of being pitied and worried about and I just want to be normal... And you can help with that. Two birds, one stone. You know?"768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgXNHGpkOs
"Uh, am I the birds or the stones here?" I chuckle. She's so weird sometimes. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SAoT6wXxO
She laughs. "Well, I guess the stone."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TKjd8mJHS
"Okay, so what are the birds?" I'm barely able to hold my laughter in to get the sentence out.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlfbYkNj2C
"Wait. No. That's wrong. You're a bird!" She sounds excited, like she's made a huge discovery or something.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGIqFiIRue
"So... I'm a bird now?" Seriously... She is the most adorable person I know.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGI2XPlZD72
"Okay, everyone is worried about me because they think you broke my heart or whatever. So, bird one is you. And everyone pities me because I'm single. So, being a pathetic loser is bird two."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuiFD6aFVwi
I turn on my side to face her. "You are not a pathetic loser." Completely ignoring the fact she said I broke her heart.768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz555miGmPJ
"I most certainly am. That's why I need this. If I can just throw the stone of our fake relationship at the birds, everything will be okay." Exhaustion fills her voice as she turns to face me. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2R0mgCqKIJ
I can't help but notice we are only inches apart. I can feel her breath on my face. If I leaned forward a fraction of an inch, our noses would be touching. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDeDoYVAGfJ
Shit. This is bad. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPICx0O159
Faking it is going to be so hard. 768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ6VpwhdTeL
"So... What do you say, Little Birdie? You in?" Her laugh echoing into the core of my being, reverberating and filling my chest.
I find her hand and pull it to my face, placing a kiss on it. "Let's throw that rock."768Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbcjJrdUye6
I am so fucked.
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