So, rather recently I've had this thought ambling around in the back of my mind. It's a thought that everyone has. It's a fear everyone has. This thought is something you never hope to be included in. This has just been stuck in my head for a while, I wanted to just get it out there.354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNM2Yf7ORK
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You see, there is a point in which everyone becomes second. There is a point in which someone else matters more. This point is what I like to call the Push Point. It is the point where you being to be pushed away. It is a point were you no longer seem to matter. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeyJP6QqKX0
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I feel like I am always at this point. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJU8EcflqiQ
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I am the person who is second by nature and first, well, hardly ever. In people's minds, I suppose, I am someone who is replaceable. To lose me is to only fill that empty space with another me. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuEIwCYEqQ
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I wonder, am I so generic that I can so easily be replaced? 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpFo9uvZVgW
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And God-forbid I speak up about my position or I really will be replaced. It feels like I don't matter enough. Do I have to be some kind of eccentric person to be accepted? Must I make myself more interesting and flattering to the eye? Do I have to change myself just to seem amazing enough to keep around?354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZR3E3jZuB
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Is that what people want nowadays? 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQq6v9C78hy
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You know, I don't think I've ever really had a best friend. I've never been first, no one has ever chosen me for anything. I'm second-best. I have fair-weather friends who only want me when there is nothing better to do. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGenQISPD9
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My feelings don't matter to them. Only they do. They want help with their lives when I'm stuck with "I'm sorry". In todays society, I feel like we, as people, are being less and less in-tune with other people's feelings. The generations now seem to only care for themselves. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMz8DDNHWNc
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Maybe I'm being a hypocrite, I am apart of said generation. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyECE9MhhVz
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But I want to be cared for and loved so badly I can't stand it. Family is obligated to love me. I want someone who choses to. Maybe I'm being selfish and too egotistical about myself. I should feel lucky to have the family and "friends" that I have now. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUf3i5MbVq
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But, I'm not. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIZtmDg4z4
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I guess its a human flaw: we always want more. We are never comfortable with what we already have. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg7ITMSG49B
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I complain a lot, it seems. Maybe I just have a lot to complain about or maybe I just need to be grateful for what I have. I know I'm not the only one. 354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDYwT2OZP0V
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- Ayame354Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkEgN1T45s
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