5/29/2019
137Please respect copyright.PENANA6wGL9ukIbM
I've checked the calendar and it seems that I've been practicing how to pole dance for 16 days; minus that day I got really depressed. I guess that means I'm very serious about this and I've been considering quitting my job at the cafe. Well, I would really miss the free and tasty coffee, and the occasional free bread or cupcake but the club has the meanest chicken wing in the city so I think it's a fare trade. I am not sure if they give free meals to the dancers but I hope they do and I also hope that I could get some free drinks. Of course I won't drink while working but I would like some free shots on the weekends. Oh the possibilities are really getting into my head that I'm finding it hard to sleep lately. Anyway, about today, I did my routine again but less sexual, like I didn't remove any clothing or showed too much skin. I just danced like I was trying to pass an exam and Scott didn't look too happy about it. He said that if I dance like a robot, nobody's gonna make it rain or worst, their gonna talk to the manager. Well, wow! I never thought that karen would also be at this club; I would have never tried because I've already taken enough shit from them while working at the cafe. When he saw that I was making faces before trying again, he said sorry because he thought it was harsh. Actually it wasn't, he was just being frank for once and I think it's just good criticism because if I want to earn big bucks, I should dance like my life depends on it. But he was sorry nonetheless and he told me that he wasn't feelin like himself because he fought with his EX on the way to work. He admitted that it was a terrible decision to remain hopeful in a toxic relationship. He really believed that maybe Benny was serious about rehab and he even supported him by giving him a place to stay and food while he is lookin for a job that will not influence him to do drugs. He said that Benny was already lookin health and dating him was fun again but yesterday, he caught him cheatin with another man. Scott told me that he saw them smoochin at a parking lot near his apartment. He said that he didn't know how to react even though he was extremely angry at that moment. Well, he knew that their relationship is not that official but he didn't expect he was that much of a bitch. I tried to return the favour just by listenin to him and just nod at every receipts that he has shown to me because he stole Benny's phone to investigate further. The tea was hot baby and it just became more serious because he asked me about what would I do in that situation. Like what would I do if my lover was cheating on me. Well, simply, maybe it's not that simple but it's just over. Because as they said, trust is like a mirror; if you break it, you can fix it but the cracks are still there to remind you of what they have done and you might never forget about it. I can't be in a relationship knowing that she or maybe he has done something not gucci behind my back. Like, he or she might do it again and what should I do if it does happen again? Just weep and forgive? I won't be like my mom! I will break up with that bastard and find someone who deserved my love. Scott agreed that it's not that simple and he also agrees that he can't trust Benny anymore but he isn't sure if someone could make him special like Benny does. Scott said that Benny is such a indecisive guy with a loud mouth that he could not believe he would like him at all but Benny can be serious and he knows how to use words to explain his feeling; also he's very thoughtful, like he won't forget about birthdays and anniversaries but then again, that is not enough. Scott said that he should have followed his instincts and just waited for the right one. I wanted to tell him that everything has a reason and this is just a learnin curve so he should not give up on finding another one but I just stayed quiet and let my eyes do the talking. When Scott finally smiled, he asked me if I could hug him. I did and I was ready for a bear hug but he kissed me. LIKE PUT HIS TONGUE IN MY MOUTH AND HE DIDN'T STOP UNTIL I WAS TURNING PURPLE!!! This motherfucker is an opportunist but I let this one go because he apologized like crazy after that.