尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHXZcehd9q
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlhPfqQSDIA
「妳瘋了嗎？」527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMwwXcfvMrC
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1KUjfrmVkd
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorYh5Ujppr
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJB1doV4X06
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkISEESLjxi
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKi7sj295W
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBz80wAO8vA
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62TupJ8ABH
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUU5DOFuHZ8
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl82uvvULW8
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡti5lQvfkCr
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKefB2vxRsS
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKTmfxH5JC
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXUNOp5KRDD
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhpK7tcP3d
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YZxWSy3yr
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2BheyBz2CD
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRbF9Fsr8o
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ277kcHY13y
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6wmmSCoBE
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnq4eOlKAGn
站在樹下的人是英傑。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dwIgnOZ3z
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyQcqeeVSN
我跑向他，勾住他的手。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2H1HdH7r9D
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKN3TOMz8gf
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KWmSHFwQH
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4DuzZKOIud
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTx24XLXoR
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJhKCL2zoB
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0yQUURRIk
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHUVteLjGP
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt4oPkclE1E
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODEu4dkMau
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS27nf9HsB6
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuLjd8dlcqn
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmX1BCbouV4
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOqURuQ0Ux
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC4sNiNau9v
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgJHdSkyK5w
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmHIcGSAvYV
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiKJxXvPpP
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTEWCME73g
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrE0P7VPVE
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmROZYTDnzW
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0x8Zv6dJp4
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwv99w4cgYU
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4X2ppdVwhx
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzu5QhqhLa
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWjmqM4afTY
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFeGVJMNPeG
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSfNbFqZoVu
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKu8ktSAVAR
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO11eQh8Vkf
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvJtCURUkP
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFl39ertanH
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY54ihrH4jZ
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWsZPJDFPrx
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzlbPj2aMD
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4aMhVfDQqJ
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkjrAUDa1KA
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZHECfQomWw
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveLvFf5qeU
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdCpSTwiZXp
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNB4CqAuCMq
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡze4bSTEODx
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx0wc76pRKo
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsVSXPIUMRj
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx59DwpY3SB
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMhT5uo4qva
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL2kJqREnUb
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJNhSt7oXEZ
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACb8iIx8Nb
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOHoMdKdl1
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdThuBFwK1c
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkByRTaRY3
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡngchfZkCOJ
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXS8qItagV
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡebRVi6rYOI
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ112LtPH5gB
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkNPKrERLS
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPUpvhAwkm
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfREx26v3Iw
在電視裡面。527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ILvrRCVrA
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lFQAiNJZp
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUDGsERStt2
527Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCtL7KUZDZ
待續。
ns216.73.216.30da2
