尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCUvQFufzX
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFEeizsz03f
「妳瘋了嗎？」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMWbDdSoMo
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfs4lYe0nO
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoqGYVygLT
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GzpTywqn8
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ63nPykzqCS
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR95jXZgJlE
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0PEDsWGdr
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfjqYSuAxR
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5PNcOBHvEi
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21VzzipKFF
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYX7kCVGskF
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8prQJHrAvN
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyKm3gOjAY
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRYSHzfm0z5
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyjlaB9WGs
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLloAIEDOp2
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7lsTpxFxj
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQnZ3sOLaJ
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA47iBqRpmZ
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6uPOnSaXUR
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uE9fKSeO4
站在樹下的人是英傑。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpWySEym2A
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMirkY6PBX5
我跑向他，勾住他的手。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fE3wjkdbF
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXaffnq3SV
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6WBI6AxQwE
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyygLHO6RVE
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQtfjfbWYH
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2j78OZqmjB
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbTBodvKBc
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2LiRPfa3m
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvfBH8KILI
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJSOg16ep2J
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Inm7VLnPB
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGMGczdTCd
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUDdx2uehXc
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRKwQH6yEQ
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfheSLEoJRL
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTS29YpUsst
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOhLpqf7QS
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQ3hNhjxeM
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKb7W7uTnez
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIMoeQcfe4C
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDM2orq93u1
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RNw2vSo1M
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHX2Ya6trd3
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8hR2Q1rCKS
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OFCvfiiPa
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CbYyMtrdk
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jQzHB3lTr
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1UbSk6zvwU
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqX9VTuoVw4
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucAMLnr39B
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡremjtTYaoP
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1f27fQIwsd
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIehQuIJYAy
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQbF7DpoaC5
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPt9kYsgaR
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxGiXzQ7Jf
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ47NqKsSbSA
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡreeeRxMUaU
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRH92VRVyjH
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwr6fYRMiY
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyrayCe7B6d
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9IWkGGnkVQ
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2aAzeGdxBb
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadUXw9PrM7
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlfFRyEDNKD
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBmJlQK8ZR
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYCp6YZeHl
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4SP5Mvxk9
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigbdGbx47u
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjffG9pf9I
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcaoQSDroNr
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjmXZNizEy
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXP8KMr7kI
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfCPwiG2Awd
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNJ4al9ZrU
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFYTFuERKN
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFvjzF6dzY
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUI9aC5TJu
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRz8UaKqzIl
在電視裡面。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqINJ6yjId
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIC7uvEGIad
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mfX9fgUiz
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCv702BNBQO
待續。
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