日子還是這樣在過，學校裡的夥伴不時耳提面命「大考將近，獎學金不能拱手讓人」的事，我知道他是逼著我轉移注意力，也就順著他的意，認真上班、認真上課、認真睡覺，好像我換了個叫「課本」的男友，天天與它相伴，沒見著它的時間，都在夢鄉。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Libq9gvhM
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZAqaelk3La
但，無論怎麼讓自己逃開，總有那幾個瞬間，會被回憶淹沒，尤其是，酸楚的回憶。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWCuUYxDXF
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGsSayHfyHl
我把自己關在家幾個禮拜，直到被朋友挖出門。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcjE0wFMSN
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiueiCXblh6
坐上朋友的車，也不是很在乎要去哪裡，明明身邊有人，但全世界好像剩下自己。
也許這些，都是失去愛情的症狀。
可笑的是我連自己是否曾經「擁有」愛情都不確定。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1z1MRwEPF
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknwTbRp0nD
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOkcWeS84B6
朋友載我到熟悉的山上，我以為他是要去山頂的土地公廟拜拜。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgOgcKupxg
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjUloD6j6vf
「妳最近不是很愛爬山嗎？帶妳來山上走走啊。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡquT8DVsFhS
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqC9RzYsg06
「……喔…」
我心裡一沉。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwarIkdQtm
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfw6P1ZNYI
他不知道我為什麼開始爬山，我又怎麼能怪他呢？578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvrdlYCQDZb
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2T5eiDhn4o
我們延著樓梯，爬到了山頂的土地公廟，便隨意照找了個地方坐下，那是山頂的展望區。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtj9bDMgo3s
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgYrACULQQ
「那是什麼山啊？」
我指著橫過城市、遠處一座被雲海包圍的山。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbpWS3AZ7K
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtjXc6Sf4k
「我哪知道。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXTfXH1Q6pn
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomyqk6aBar
「……說的也是。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2zfOFkE8Nh
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzwvU1ssB7B
我才發現自己的愚蠢。
那是我和張先生一同爬山時，我很常說的話。
他總是像個「山的萬事通」，有問必答，即使在我看來那些山都長得一個模樣，他仍能數家珍般地，念出它們的名。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVdZAdr6NAq
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡezGWDmqLXE
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGYw48bRiWR
黑兔子找我去唱歌，在包廂裡和另一個女生朋友故意想弄哭我，不停點悲傷的歌來唱，一開始我只是笑，笑她們無聊。
直到某首歌的歌詞刺進我的心裡，痛了那麼一下，我哭了，就停不下來。
兩個女生見我掉淚，居然也跟著哭了，還哭得比我悽慘。最後我還得幫她們擦眼淚。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL422lMluPh
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VDPP3ZE72
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCfizTJ0Lw
我很努力要自己不去怨懟、不去記恨，但總對自己被欺騙一事糾結，同時也怪自己不夠聰明、不夠謹慎。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5q8CD1FTw
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vfJVJShF8
無法灑脫。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIidUleqyBL
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5AIcIwdVB
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw692IfDRGk
我還是持續的爬山，但不明白自己是因為什麼而爬。
我害怕自己是為了不忘記他，所以更不敢面對這個問題。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv8u6AqMq4I
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXOowrhjT2K
直到某次，母親找我一同去爬山。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0XK3nlPS39
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJHTTTs7Ua
那是一座有著神話故事點綴的郊山，山上的涼亭裡還用木板刻著傳說。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡruY2ljFKlD
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHrNUiFN40
「這是我和妳爸爸第一次約會的地方。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5zMRRsIIp
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe05RrZ8xEA
母親突然提起父親，自他們離異後，母親甚少和我聊父親的事。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvEf9KZMngw
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpclR5ZOsC
「我喜歡運動，妳爸爸不愛。我喜歡在舞池跳舞，他只想坐在沙發聊天。妳爸爸體能好，明明是蛙人，運動神經好，私底下卻懶惰得要命。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzldgH4rquT
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjEBhOri3u
「但這是我們第一次約會的地方。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bS31fDlP3
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRLZ2Wk4OE
我不知道母親為什麼突然說這些。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw6OX4Nj6Ro
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXIvXB53Re
「妳和那個來過家裡的先生，應該沒有再聯絡了吧？」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTHNe5Bduw
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVm09XWf7Y
「沒有了。」我立刻回答。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxq0p4crSXz
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB0EEJiq3Cs
「妳一開始喜歡上爬山，是因為他嗎？」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtetGI14FjE
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxnpYsXHPY
「嗯。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstLQBL59Mu
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTEQObhv2tu
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6cCN8UA9g
「那他留給妳的影響，就夠了。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIddEqePU8
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9g4xpvzNqS
我還不明白。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQhVy0546pp
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNL0hHuAmx
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEZ1xIl7ZV
「妳本來就喜歡小動物、小昆蟲，剛剛一路上來妳都在跟我介紹那些蜘蛛蝸牛，山區就是讓妳更親近牠們的地方，妳這段路爬上來有想到那個男人嗎？」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7ZXszi2GQ
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzr2MT0pIob
「……沒有。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZNaf3FElH
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkW2fSAUYN
「那妳還介意是誰啟發妳喜歡爬山嗎？」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGIOJQnE4i
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7AIoNY7XbR
我盯著她，努力消化她的話語。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtlmXFhGtn
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFFvzxPySyz
「不管事情是怎麼開始的，只要最後有好的地方值得妳保留就好了。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLqnjkaJkA
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqesWsbrOZ
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6mOCKnQHao
「妳沒必要忘記。」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkeBpjvSC2
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuITXQ3WayV
我的眼淚差一點就奪眶而出。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFsqjQi51Gz
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6cAVAN1GQL
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFFc3KYiGB
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFwMXkQbuoZ
後來。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxsP7Vsndt3
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2J0gy1ant
學期順利結束，我依然拿到系上的獎學金。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9p4YA4riy
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo83jJGEjmW
真正了解我的家人朋友，都沒有怪我隱瞞他們，我以為會面對很多責怪，卻意外收到過多的心疼。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJZcmIbe1F
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo14R3jDlL8
我去爬了更多的山，也因為山結交了更多新朋友，也間接因為爬山認識了現在的男朋友。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ661qGqXoB
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeF6SYOjpqr
在之後我曾和幾個好友在居酒屋裡，酒酣耳熱之際說完了整個故事，朋友們聽到我查證的過程，開玩笑的說「妳怎麼不去徵信社上班啊！」578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJ8Dd5tCzt
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1LjkKim3i
而我真的在因緣際會下踏入了徵信業。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3HyTIu8Ms
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8suRZvfnU
看到了更多更多事例，才知道感情的故事，真的都是一個套路，所以我們總覺得「這首歌在寫我」，「這個故事在說我」…因為我們的感情路，好好壞壞，都差不多會是那個樣子。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1NSjspaQvb
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbfXoSaB1m
我沒有繼續怨恨他，但也沒有原諒他，我只是原諒自己。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcH5Bf2O4D2
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEQs4OqWkm
在寫這篇之前，我偷偷地搜尋了他的名字，發現他們有了個可愛的女兒。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2GVSC72qt
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6QiFoXbys
「希望你專心愛她們。」我發自內心的想。578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2mjA6HWU0m
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuMXBoC8qSw
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjh2XD0mXTA
578Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSQzvQd8Xd
完。
ns216.73.216.176da2
